A/N: I know very little about Lucy and Alex's relationship, so forgive me if you're don't like him or The Cab. I love both. Oh, and Cady Groves' involvement in this story is entirely fictional, although its apparently now possible that she's dating Alex DeLeon (lead singer of The Cab)...either way, just glad to know she hangs out with those boys! LOVE THEM!
Chapter 8
If It's Just Temporary Bliss
"tell me what's the point of doing this every night
What you're giving me is nothing but a hollow soul lullaby
When you kill my dreams
Oh, this is the last time, baby make up your mind…"
"I thought you hated that song," Ian said as he pulled the clasp shut on his watch. Lucy was seated at the kitchen table, scribbling out a list while her iPhone played The Cab nearby.
"I do," she said. She looked up a moment later, tapping the pen on her bottom lip as she tried to figure if she had figured out everything correctly for her shopping list. The apartment was getting dangerously low on food, and she and Ian had been working ridiculous schedules for the past ten days, which hadn't left either of them time to pick up any food. "Or at least, I did."
"Still on pleasant terms with Alex then, I suppose?" Ian asked as he walked over to her. He peered at the list over her shoulder and then pointed to the dairy group. "Milk. The stuff we have went bad," he shook his head, disgusted. "Weeks ago. I don't know how it was still in there. Oh, and kraft cheese."
"Yuck," Lucy muttered, adding both items to the list.
"Sorry," Ian said in a lightly teasing voice. "I like cheeseburgers. You're the oddball here, love. And am I wrong, or did you actually like that bacon cheeseburger you stole half of last night?"
Lucy rolled her eyes. "Your baby is blackballing me on food. Apparently she likes cheese. That doesn't mean I have to once this is all said and done." She reached over and turned down the music on her phone. "And yes, we are. It's only by e-mail, but he's…well he's a lot more cordial than Chris is."
Ian nodded, sitting down in the chair next to hers. He grabbed one of his converse hightops from the floor and shoved his foot into it before resting his heel on the chair and pulling the laces. "The song?"
Lucy rolled her eyes at him, looking back at her list. It was nearly two pages long, but she'd also added other necessities to the list. "When I got past the fact that it was about me, it doesn't totally suck."
"It's about you?" Ian asked.
Lucy shrugged. "To some degree, a couple of them are. And when he and I started falling apart, you and I were spending a lot of time together. I guess he got it in his head that we were together again."
Ian nodded, pulling his other shoe on and tying it. "We did come pretty close last year."
Lucy smiled up at him and reached across the table, squeezing his hand lightly. Their close call was a drunken kiss after a cast dinner for Ian's birthday, during which their regular repartee had been laced with shameless flirting. Lucy hadn't entirely been over Alex at that point though, and had quickly pulled a halt to anything that could've happened the next morning when she told him that she shouldn't have kissed him.
"Yeah, and I shouldn't have ever said that it was wrong," Lucy said.
"Luce-"
"No," she said dismissively. "I said it because I was wasn't ready, but that didn't make it true. The reality of it was that I was too afraid to let myself be aware of what was between us. It was always so much easier to drum it up to great chemistry for Ezra and Aria, even when it wasn't true."
Ian nodded. He smiled a bit. "I remember when you made that comment about us kissing during the ustream, and how you should kiss someone like you'd kiss them in real life. It made me feel cheated, because it seemed like it was all the work and none of the feeling."
"It wasn't fair," Lucy replied. "I don't know what I was so afraid of. I don't think I really realized that I was, either, until we had sex, and I just wanted to forget it like the kiss."
Her phone chimed on the table. She reached over and grabbed it and cleared the screen before standing up. "I'm gonna change so we can go get some food."
Ian nodded. Once she'd left the room, he looked over the shopping list, making sure she'd gotten everything written down that they needed before he turned her laptop around and looked at the shopping cart she'd put together that morning on amazon. He enjoyed seeing her through this pregnancy more because of her eagerness than anything else. It seemed like each week, her excitement for the baby grew. For a few weeks after she'd told him that she was pregnant, he'd worried that she would see the baby as a bad thing that had pressured her into something, but she hadn't shown any emotion of the sort.
Curiosity peaked in him, and he clicked on the facebook tab. She was still logged in. He clicked on her messages, and then clicked on the thread with Alex. He skimmed over them and then stopped when he reached the bottom message.
I'll be in LA for three days this weekend. If you're up for it we should meet for… well you probably aren't drinking much coffee right now, eh? Maybe a smoothie? Send me a text and let me know! It's good talking to you again, Luce.
"If you wanted to know what he said, all you had to do was ask."
Ian looked over his shoulder. Lucy was hooking an earring in her ear.
"I-"
"I don't care that you were doing it," she said. "I have nothing to hide. I'd never get back together with him." She walked over to him and sat down in Ian's lap. "Didn't you hear the lyrics? I'm only your one and lonely only when you're lonely? Baby why you calling me? Alex and I are on good terms. As friends."
"And you're sure he's clear on that too?" Ian asked. "Because it's not you I don't trust. After everything Chris has done lately-"
Lucy nodded, running her hand down the back of his head. "I'm positive. Last I checked, he was dating some new up and comer named Cady Groves."
Ian nodded, but it was clear her name didn't register for him. Lucy chuckled. "She's the girl who sings Murder. 'Every girl is capable of murder if you hurt her'?"
"Oh that song," Ian replied.
"So do you talk to Sophia at all?" Lucy asked curiously.
Ian shook his head. "Not in almost six months, except for the occasional message from a friend of a friend saying she said hi or asked how I was doing."
-
I can't keep sleeping your bed
If you keep messing with my head
-
Lucy sipped from her smoothie, chewing lightly on her straw. Something felt odd today, but she hadn't quite been able to place it just yet. In the midst of it all, she was doing her best to keep distracted by keeping her attention on Ian. They'd spent nearly two hours at the store that morning shopping, and then picking out colors for the baby's room. They were still trying to be smart and not plan too far ahead, but she wanted to get the painting done before she was too far along, and given that they would be spending time with their families after their mid-season break came, she wanted to get the painting done before they left.
She'd also been in talks with music labels. She had promised her fans that this was the year she was going to put some of the focus back into her music career and she intended to make good on her. It floored her sometimes that she still had fans from almost a decade earlier. Still, nothing was set in stone, but she wanted to be able to devote her short vacation from Pretty Little Liars to that before she got too far along in her pregnancy, or more, gave birth, and didn't have the time to talk with label representatives.
Ian ran a hand down her back and she moaned softly in response. She might've only put on a few pounds since the beginning of her pregnancy, but the little bit of weight was doing a number on her ankles and lower back anyway.
"Lucy!"
She looked up in the direction of the voice that had called her name. Alex was walking up with his new girlfriend. She waved, yawning.
Alex and Cady walked up and sat down across the table from Ian and Lucy. Pleasantries were exchanged.
"It's so pretty out today," Lucy murmured, widening her eyes for a moment. The exhaustion that came with pregnancy had started creeping up on her. It seemed that the closer she got to hiatus with Pretty Little Liars, the more her body decided it wanted to sleep.
"LA heat," Alex said with a nod. "The only city where it rains more on a TV set than in the city."
Lucy chuckled, taking a drink from her smoothie. "Are you guys back in the studio yet?"
"Not yet," Alex replied. "We're on the road for a bit more. They're pushing La La on the radio right now, so… What about you? Did you meet with any label heads yet? I saw you said on twitter something about music?"
"Yeah, no," Lucy said with a slight frown. "I'm doing what I can, but it's taking time. Mostly just writing a lot of lyrics at the moment. We'll see what happens though."
"Anything that I should be afraid of?" Alex teased. "I'm certainly cautious about what I say with this one," he said, tipping his head teasingly towards Cady.
"I tell the truth with my lyrics," she said unabashedly.
"Exactly!" Lucy said cheerfully. "And you mean something like Temporary Bliss? No. But I did bring something along I wanted you to take a look at. I'm kind of taking shots in the dark right now, trying to write anything."
"Sure," Alex nodded. Lucy grabbed a small notebook from her bag and pulled it out, flipping the book open to the page she wanted an opinion on, and then handed it over. It was silent for a few moments as he read, and then asked if Cady could as well since she wrote her own lyrics too. After a few moments, he returned the notebook to Lucy.
"Does it seem good?" She asked.
"It does," Alex said. Cady nodded.
"He doesn't know originality if it doesn't involve a repeating chorus, but I think it's great. It'd be great to collaborate sometime if you're up for it."
Lucy nodded, smiling
The rest of the afternoon passed gracefully. After a little while longer of feeling awkward, the foursome split up and Lucy headed back to the apartment with Ian. Upon arrival, she walked over to the large chaise longue in their sitting room and curled up on it. Ian joined her, and she curled up against him.
"Sorry if that meeting made you feel awkward today," she said quietly.
"Not really awkward," Ian said. "More out of place."
Lucy tilted her head up to look at him. "I would've showed you what I was working on, but its for you, and I needed a musicians view on it. But it's good to know that I don't have any bad blood with at least oneof my exes."
Ian chuckled, rubbing his hand gently up and down her back. "Just put Chris out of your mind. He's gone to London now anyway, hasn't he?"
"For now," Lucy murmured. "Hopefully he stays away when he comes back to the states."
"Well with any luck, we'll be on hiatus and out of LA when he turns up," Ian said with a hopeful tint.
Lucy sighed, nodding. "I can't wait to go on break in two weeks. I swear, every day my body pushes me just a little bit more; 'take a nap, Lucy. You know it's what you want to do'."
Ian chuckled, brushing his lips against her forehead. "So take a nap. I'm not going anywhere."
-
Say I should leave, you're over me
Say something, say anything
-
Lucy yawned as she took a sip from her non-caffeinated iced latte and rubbed her eyes as she settled the cup next to her in her chair. Ian was shooting a scene with Holly – one of their first in weeks. She was set to be filming with all three of the girls later in the evening, but at the moment, she was extremely bored.
Her phone buzzed next to her, and her gaze dropped to her phone. She picked it up and tapped the screen.
Alex:
On the back lot shooting a music video.
Lunch?
She looked up at Ian and Holly, who were still shooting the scene. It was the one thing that she disliked about her job. The days when you had to shoot the same scene fifty times so that they could have a dozen different options when it went to editing.
The director called cut, and Ian crossed the room, stepping out of from in front of the cameras.
"Are you taking a break?" She asked.
Ian shook his head. "Not for any longer than to use the bathroom and get a drink." He picked his phone up off his chair and checked to make sure he hadn't missed any messages, and saw the time. "Get lunch without me."
"You sure?" She asked. "Alex texted and asked if I'd meet him."
Ian nodded. He leaned over and kissed her chastely. "Have a cheeseburger for me."
Lucy narrowed her eyes at him. "Ha. Ha."
She hopped down off her chair and grabbed her bag before kissing him quickly and then heading out of the building. She made her way across the parking lot, which they often used in the past as the parking lot for Rosewood High School. She spotted Alex heading towards her a few moments later.
She waved to him, and he reached her a little over a minute later carrying two white paper bags.
"I got you two enchiladas," he told her as they made their way across the parking lot. They settled on a bench on what was supposed to be the outside of the high school, and Alex handed over a bag. Lucy pulled out one of the enchiladas and opened it up. She took a bite out of it and smiled as the flavour of chicken filled her mouth.
"So how's it going with the liars?" He asked.
Lucy chuckled, shrugging. "I'm not doing anything right now, other than sitting in a chair and wishing for something to do. You kind of saved me from losing my mind."
He nodded. "I read something last night on…what was it? The Hollywood Reporter?"
Lucy grinned and he smiled.
"So it's true then. Hollywood Records?"
She nodded happily, pulling a piece of tortilla off her enchilada and popping it in her mouth. She chewed and swallowed before answering. "It's been in talks for a few weeks, but I wanted to be sure it was going to happen. And anyway, it's not going to be out for like a year."
"Still," Alex said cheerfully. "That's huge!"
Lucy smiled, owning her happiness. They ate in silence for a few moments before she looked back up at him. "Can I ask you something?"
He nodded. "Sure. Anything."
Lucy wiped her hands off with a napkin and rolled up the wrapper to the first enchilada and then reached into the bag and grabbed the second. "When we broke up… did you cheat because of Ian?"
Alex's expression shifted quickly, showing his surprise at her question. It wasn't necessarily that he had a problem answering it, but more that, if she was truly happy with Ian, then why ask him about his prior relationship choices.
"Does it really matter?" He replied.
Lucy shrugged, pulling tortilla off her second enchilada. "I don't know. I guess it's just that now, sometimes when I think back to how things were with us, and how things were with Chris…I wonder."
Alex nodded as soon as Chris' name passed her lips and he quickly understood why she was truly asking. "Well I can't speak for the child," he replied. "But for me…I guess part of it was. I mean you could say things until you were blue in the face about what would or wouldn't happen with you and Ian, but it was different when you were the boyfriend, watching from the outside."
He took a deep breath and picked up his drink taking a long sip from it. "To be honest with you though, I could see that something was going to happen there. Whether it happened after two days or two years. I jumped the gun because I figured if someone was going to get hurt, I wanted it to be you and not me. I ended up hurt in the end anyway."
Lucy nodded, understanding what he was telling her. She stared at the ground for a few moments before she looked up at him. "But you're happy now, right?"
Alex nodded, and a smile was once again on his face. "Yeah. I'm happy."
When they finished with lunch, Lucy headed back into the building and he headed back to the lot that he had been at with his band. She was grateful back to be in the cool air instead of out in the summer heat.
Ian was sitting in his chair when she made it back, playing a heated game of tetris.
"Want my leftovers?" She asked as she sat down next to him.
Ian forfeited his game and looked up at her. "No thank you. How was lunch?"
Lucy shrugged. "It was good. He answered a question only he could answer."
Ian nodded. "And what was that?"
"If he cheated because of you," she replied honestly.
"Ouch," Ian replied. He could tell by her expression what the answer had been.
Lucy let out a deep breath, looking over at him. "I guess I was ignorant to how many people I was hurting when I wasn't seeing it. A part of me wishes I'd known that this would happen then. Maybe I wouldn't have hurt so many people then."
Ian shook his head. "Don't look at it that way. You should be allowed to enjoy this time, regardless of how you got here. You might've been wrong for hurting Chris, but he's gotten you back tenfold for that. You have no reason to feel bad about what happened."
"You really think so?" She asked.
Ian leaned over in his chair and pecked her on the lips. He brushed his hand down the back of her head and smiled at her. "Baby, I know so."
The rest of the afternoon passed easily, and by the time they were driving home, they were both exhausted.
Lucy stared down at the face book IM she had open on her phone and read the conversation she'd been having since getting in the car.
Lucygoose:
Okay, officially out
What's up?
Alex Marshall:
I was curious of something,
If you don't mind me asking.
Lucygoose:
Not at all. Go ahead.
Alex Marshall:
What the child posted on twitter
back in January…Was it true?
Did you cheat on him?
Lucygoose:
*deep breath*
Alex Marshall:
I'm not judging you either way,
but…idk. I'm curious.
Lucygoose:
Yes.
It wasn't planned, and I wasn't
trying to be malicious, but it
happened.
I never expected he'd react
the way he did.
Alex Marshall:
Refer to above comment
about him being a child :P
Lucygoose:
lol :/)
Alex Marshall:
You're pretty great, Luce.
I'm sorry we ever stopped
being friends.
Ian looked over at her as she tapped back a similar reply.
"Cheatin' on me over there?" He teased.
Lucy rolled her eyes and chuckled. "Nope." She looked up at him as she closed out the app on her phone and grabbed his hand. "I'm just realizing how grateful we should be that we have Alex as an ally. And that Sophia hasn't said anything about us."
Ian nodded. "We are pretty lucky that way."
"But you know what I want to be lucky about now?" Lucy asked.
"Getting lucky?" Ian asked, raising an eyebrow suggestively at her.
She giggled and shook her head. "SLEEP!"
"Oh," he replied slightly defeated. "Well, that's pretty great too."
Lucy chuckled and then stared at him for a moment, making a decision. She released his hand a moment later and reached across his lap, placing her hand high on his thigh as he pulled up to a red light. She leaned over in her seat and brushed her lips up against his ear.
"And maybe you'll get a little lucky too." She moved her hand up closer to his manhood and brushed her hand lightly over the zipper of his jeans before settling back into her seat. Ian shuddered.
It was going to be a long night.