Disclaimer- Stephenie still owns the usual suspects.
I own my original characters and original story.
*This parallels chapter 57 of V&V 'Making Plans & False Allegations'. It was so long that I'm not doing a double chapter…However I will post chapter 58 before returning to V&V.
Enjoy!
****************************LRM**********************************
Chapter 57 – Two Steps Forward, Three Steps Back
Dr. Miller was exactly what Bella needed. From what Bella told me, she didn't ram her ideas down her throat, she more or less let Bella decide what they needed to discuss.
I fell into easy conversation with her. After we left, I realized that this is someone I could talk to quite comfortably about my own anxiety. It was something I should probably consider doing in the near future.
Stress. Dr. Miller touched on the one area that seemed to be literally haunting my dreams. The fucking nightmares stopped once Bella was with me, but the memory still haunted me, adding to my stress level substantially.
I'd already decided that if the stress of being in the public eye as a couple became too much after our marriage I'd change careers, plain and simple. We could move to France like Johnny, maybe buy a vineyard.
That actually sounds like a wonderful idea.
Or we could move to the North Pole and live in an igloo as long as we were together.
I didn't give a fuck.
Bella was delighted when I had Sidney drive us to the movie theater. She wanted to see Letters To Juliet.
I wanted to laugh out loud when Bella stared down a few of the female moviegoers. She was so adorable. Granted the women were staring, and probably attempting to flirt with me, but I'd learned a long time ago to ignore that shit.
If they didn't get the message through Bella's pointed glares, I believe it was driven home by the fact that my arms remained around her during the entire feature.
I waited until the lights dimmed before stealing a few innocent kisses even though the sight of a jealous Bella made me want to kiss the hell out of her.
On the ride home, she talked about wanting to go to Italy next winter. I couldn't help it, every time Bella brought up something which would take place after our marriage I would become absolutely giddy inside.
It is quite possible that I may have grown a mangina.
Best of all, when I thought of being married to Bella, I was overcome with a feeling of 'rightness'. It was as if everything in my life had been leading up to that day.
It was meant to be. We were meant to be.
I longed to be able to show her, with no restrictions, how utterly and completely in love I was with her. Something I intended to show her every day for the rest of our lives.
-LRM—
Christopher was in rare form that evening as we ate pizza at Emmett and Rose's. Evidently he'd spent a good portion of the day doing fittings for several of Emmett's groomsmen and had gotten rather keyed up.
Jasper and I were in the wedding, but we had yet to meet all the other groomsmen.
I suppose that will happen at the bachelor party.
I made a mental note to speak with the Chief and Jasper about how we could incorporate a little 'payback for Emmett' into said party.
Knowing that Chris was in a committed relationship with Gerry made his remarks all the more hilarious. He certainly knew how to push buttons and make people around him a little nervous, all in good fun of course. I'd known him for so long, that I'd become immune to his teasing, although I had to admit that I enjoyed watching him in action.
When Emmett choked on his beer in reaction to Chris's remarks about Charlie, the room filled with raucous laughter.
Bella snorted at one point after that, causing me to turn and look at her. I silently wondered if that was in reaction to Emmett's discomfort. As I sat there pondering other ways in which we could take Emmett out of his comfort zone, his big mouth interrupted my thoughts.
"Bella, would you please stop eye-fucking Edward. It's beginning to make me uncomfortable, not as uncomfortable as the thought of Pops in bed with Chris, but uncomfortable nevertheless." Emmett boomed.
Eye-fucking?
Bella?
I turned to look at Bella, only to be treated to the sight of that lovely blush enhancing her already beautiful, albeit embarrassed, features.
"I hate you Emmett." She muttered as I pulled her against me.
"I happen to know for a fact that's not true." Emmett smirked before taking another swig of his beer.
Jackass
I pulled her closer, rubbing her arm soothingly as I leaned down to kiss her hair. "Baby, don't be upset. I love it that you were staring." I whispered in her ear.
It was the damn truth. I always felt like such a pervert because I spent the majority of my time ogling Bella, holding Bella, imagining getting naked with Bella…
"I'm not thrilled that Emmett embarrassed you though." I added.
She still wouldn't look at me. "Bella, I stare at you all the time, and I'm not ashamed to admit it."
She smiled in reaction to my confession.
"Better?" I questioned.
She nodded before I gave her a gentle kiss on the lips.
After the pizza, Rose blew the candles out on her cake. While everyone was enjoying a slice, I pulled Jasper aside. "Do we know of anything, other than the thought of Chris in bed with Charlie, that makes Emmett squirm?" I asked.
A sly grin came across Jasper's face. "I may know of a couple things. Do I sense a little 'payback' may be in the works?"
"Fuck yeah" I answered before we clinked our beer bottles together.
-LRM—
I'd finally decided to broach the subject which had been on my mind since I'd returned from England while we lay in bed that evening. "Baby, I've been home an entire week already." I announced.
"Wow, a whole week? I hope the rest of the time until our wedding moves that quickly." She answered.
"Do you? Do you really Bella?" I whispered. She had been so physically distant since my return that my fears had run rampant. I rolled on to my side in order to face her.
She turned to look at me, surprise evident on her face. "Of course I do Edward. Why would you ask that?"
"It's just that," I let out a breath
Just fucking say it.
"I don't know, before you left England, I thought things were progressing between us physically. Only now, you seem to have pulled back."
I let those words hang there for a moment before continuing.
"I'm just afraid that you may never be ready for.."
sex
She interrupted me. "Edward, no. You're wrong. So, so wrong." She whispered as she caressed my cheek.
I was utterly confused.
"I'm sorry that I haven't been more forthcoming since you got back." She said softly. "Our relationship is the most important thing in my life, and I apologize for 'living in my own head' so much lately."
"I haven't said this out loud until now, but I'd really liked to wait until our wedding night to make love." She said the words slowly.
I was so thrilled that she actually still wanted me that I didn't care if I had to wait until the wedding. I was such a geek that I'd been keeping a count ever since we'd chosen a wedding date.
"I hope you're not too disappointed, I mean it's only a little over two months away…"
"Eighty-two days" I blurted.
God, now she's going to know what a freak I am.
When she gave me a questioning look, I defended. "I've been keeping track." I admitted sheepishly.
She smiled before continuing. "You see, it's not that I don't want to do it, it's just that if we take up where we left off in England, I'm afraid I won't be able to stop."
I let out a breath, I needed to make sure. "Are you certain that you're not just afraid Bella? You know I'd never force myself on you."
"Edward, please believe me, I'm not afraid, especially not of you. You've been nothing but patient and kind with me. I really want to make love, God how I want to…" She smiled ruefully. "I just don't want to be in Emmett and Rose's situation."
Dear God I hadn't even thought of that.
"Pregnant?" I questioned, a little alarmed.
She laughed.
What the hell about that is even remotely funny?
"Well, that's something to consider. But I was thinking more about having to abstain. Right now, we don't know what we're missing. If we did, and had to stop, I'm pretty sure it would be torture, even worse than the torture we've having to endure now. I've had to listen to my brother and Rose complain loudly and without shame, about their lack of a sex life." She shuddered.
So she's afraid to do 'it' because she knows it will be so good that we won't want to stop. She is one of a kind.
I snickered. "You have a very unique take on things Bella." I smiled as I pulled her to me, kissing her lips. "I adore your quirky mind, and I understand your reservations about getting closer physically. But I'd still really like it if you lost this shirt." I said as I fingered the sleeve of her shirt, fully expecting her to turn me down.
Her look of surprise made me chuckle, but didn't change the fact that I really wanted to see and feel her again. "I promise to behave." I murmured. "I just need to feel your skin against mine. Please baby."
She sighed and sat up to face me. I followed and sat facing her. I decided to remove my shirt, hoping against hope that she'd do the same.
She took a breath. "You promise you'll behave?" She asked. "Because Edward, I'll have you know that my will power is shit right now. I am literally hanging on by a thread. It wouldn't take much to change my mind."
"But you'd regret it tomorrow Bella." I said while giving her a soft smile.
"That's just the thing, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't regret it." She said before pecking me on the lips. "Not even a little."
What the..?
I laughed. "So why are we waiting exactly?"
She sighed. "Once we make love Edward, I'll be yours in every way. I'd really like to be yours legally and morally before that happens. I'm not taking this step lightly, it's a big commitment." She answered with a hopeful look in her eyes.
Of course I understood.
I smiled. "Do you know how much it means to me that I'll be your first Bella? You're already giving me such a wonderful gift by marrying me, but to know that you trust me that much…it's humbling actually. I don't deserve you."
She is everything to me.
She placed her hand on my cheek again. "Edward, what you just said, that was the sweetest, most romantic thing. I feel the same way about you. I mean, I'm your first too…it's kind of hard to wrap my head around how truly wonderful that is."
Then she dropped her hand and gave me a knowing smirk. "But, if you keep up with the sexy, romantic talk, I am certain that my panties will abandon my body, which in turn will probably cause you to lose your boxer briefs."
I grinned.
Was it terrible that part of me secretly wished for that? Okay, most of me wished for that.
She frowned. "Under no circumstances is that allowed to happen Edward. Just like in the movies, you need to keep your package covered." She ordered. "Because if you don't, I know for a fact that I'll be riding you like a mechanical bull before morning."
She is going to be a death of me.
I was conflicted. The hard-on which I was now sporting due to the image of Bella riding me was warring with my need to laugh out loud at her words.
The need to laugh won.
I fell back on the bed and laughed my ever-loving ass off. The hard-on made a comeback though, when in the middle of my laughing fit Bella yanked her shirt over her head and tossed it aside.
I tried not to ogle, but she was absolutely beautiful.
We both sighed contentedly as we snuggled together after that.
I had known for some time that our first time would not be spontaneous, and I was okay with that. I wanted it to be special for Bella, and that meant well-planned. From what I'd heard, it can easily turn out to be a bad experience for the woman if the man is not careful and doesn't make sure to put her comfort before his own selfish desires.
"If we're really going to wait until our wedding night, I need to ask one favor." I said quietly.
"What's that?" She whispered.
"I want to plan the honeymoon."
"Why?" Bella asked.
"Because I want everything to be perfect, and I also want to surprise you." I murmured.
I have an idea of the perfect place.
"And I want there to be as much distance as possible between your brother and us when we finally make love." I admitted with a chuckle.
Too fucking true.
She laughed with me. "Smart man, I knew you weren't just a pretty face." She said with a giggle.
"Pretty?" I asked, insulted. "Please Bella, you are wounding my male ego." I said, teasing her.
"Okay I'll rephrase. You got a purty mouth." She continued.
Images from the movie Deliverance suddenly came unbidden into my head.
Yep, now I'm completely soft.
"Bella!" I blurted with a laugh.
"Alright" She stuttered between laughs. "You are smart and handsome." She said while punctuating each word with a kiss. "Better?"
Much
"Better" I grinned before taking her into my arms and giving her a proper kiss.
-LRM—
The next few days were good. I tried not to let my anxiety govern my mood, but it was a struggle. It had been a relief to discover that Bella's reasons for waiting to be intimate were not caused by fear, or by the fact that she just wasn't interested in having sex with me, but I still couldn't seem to relax.
Before meeting with Bella for lunch on Wednesday, I had clued my mother into the fact that Bella was intimidated by the large guest list. My Mom had gone overboard by including every one of her and Dad's society friends and many local politicians. Most of these people, I discovered, Mom and Dad only saw at cocktail parties or at charity events throughout the year.
Bella and I had discussed it and decided that if one of us didn't know the invitee personally, or they weren't a relative, we would only invite them to the reception. Mom wouldn't have given us a hard time no matter what we decided, but I could tell she was pleased.
Before we left the restaurant, my mother mentioned that she'd spoken to my grandfather about our scheduled visit in June. I couldn't wait to introduce Bella to him, I knew he'd adore her.
The next day while Bella was as school, I phoned him.
"Hello"
"Hello Duke"
"Edward, you haven't changed your mind about the trip have you?" My grandfather asked in a worried tone.
"No, I just hadn't talked to you in a while. How have you been?" I answered.
"I'm getting old Edward." He stated flatly.
I chuckled. "Duke, you'll never be old."
"Maybe to you, and Alice, and my other grandchildren, but I'm starting to feel it son." He sighed then. "Be that as it may, I'm really looking forward to your visit. Hell I'm even looking forward to the big shindig in August. Your Mom says it's going to be quite an affair."
I could actually hear his smile over the line.
"We're basically giving Mother free reign over the reception." I admitted.
Duke barked out a laugh. "You're a brave man Edward. You do know that she and Alice don't know when to stop don't you?"
I laughed out loud then. "Sometimes, I'm made painfully aware of that fact."
"What does your young lady think of all that?" He asked. "I mean, I knew she must be something special to have caught your eye, but to give your mother carte blanche over the wedding preparations, well.."
"She's one of a kind." I finished for him.
Duke took a deep breath. "You've been alone and lonely for too long son. It's not healthy for a young person to shut themselves off the way you have for years, although from what your mother tells me, I don't need to worry about you anymore."
Yet another person who has worried about my well-being for years. I am so undeserving of my wonderful family.
"You'll see for yourself very soon." I answered quietly. "Bella has changed me."
"I'm glad Edward." He stated before changing the subject. "Anything special you want to do while you're here?"
"I think we'll just play it by ear. The only thing planned so far is an appearance on Oprah."
Duke chuckled. "This is going to sound stupid, but sometimes I forget you're a movie star."
I laughed. "Yeah, me too. I'll see you soon."
"Goodbye my boy."
After disconnecting the call, I walked back into the bedroom to change into my workout clothes, thinking that Emmett might like to go down to the exercise room with me. When I reached the dresser I stopped dead at the sight of Bella's ipod sitting on top.
I was surprised, and also a little nosey. She always took that thing with her when she left.
I grabbed the workout clothes and changed into them. After brushing my teeth, I walked past the dresser and shot a dirty look at the ipod. I really didn't want to fucking snoop, but I was finding it hard to resist.
After going to the kitchen for a drink, I made up some lame excuse to walk back into the bedroom in order to pass the dresser again. This time I touched a button, making the screen come to life. I stood there with my hands on my hips trying to make my decision.
Just look at the damn playlists.
I shrugged and picked up the ipod, scrolling immediately to Bella's playlists. It only took a second to find what I wanted. It was titled simply Edward.
I should have felt ashamed for snooping, but I didn't. Not one bit.
The first song was by Coldplay. I'd never heard it before, but the title intrigued me: Green Eyes. I had to suppose that it made Bella think of me. I put the earbuds in and pressed play.
.
Honey you are a rock
Upon which I stand
And I come here to talk
I hope you understand
That green eyes, yeah the spotlight, shines upon you
And how could, anybody, deny you
I came here with a load
And it feels so much lighter, now I've met you
And honey you should know, that I could never go on without you
.
I chuckled, finding the line about the 'spotlight' humorous. Aside from that, the lyrics could just as easily have been about Bella, and what she means to me. I skipped to the next song. I'd heard this one on the radio a lot over the past few years.
.
How can you see into my eyes like open doors
leading you down into my core
where I've become so numb without a soul my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
until you find it there and lead it back home
Wake me up, Wake me up inside
I can't wake up, Wake me up inside
Save me, call my name and save me from the dark
Wake me up, bid my blood to run
I can't wake up, before I come undone
Save me, save me from the nothing I've become
.
Again it could have just as easily described the fact that my life started the day we met.
I decided to listen to the entire playlist without reading the song titles first. As I sat back on the sofa, I let the music wash over me. I listened to song after song which expressed the thoughts and feelings that Bella didn't always say out loud.
There was one song that I really liked. It was very 'Bella'. It also sounded vaguely familiar, but I just couldn't place where I'd heard it.
.
You're stuck on me and my laughing eyes
I can't pretend though I try to hide - I like you
I like you.
I think I felt my heart skip a beat
I'm standing here and I can hardly breathe - you got me
You got me.
The way you take my hand is just so sweet
And that crooked smile of yours it knocks me off my feet
Oh, I just can't get enough
How much do I need to fill me up.
It feels so good it must be love
It's everything that I've been dreaming of.
I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.
Cause no matter what I do,
Oh (oh) my heart is filled with you.
.
I laughed out loud when 'Kiss' by Prince began to play, and my heart clenched at the opening strains of 'Have I Told You Lately' by Van Morrison, taking me back to the night I proposed.
The old Dean Martin standard 'You Belong to Me' brought a smile to my face.
.
See the pyramids along the Nile
Watch the sunrise from a tropic isle
Just remember darling all the while
You belong to me
Fly the ocean in a silver plane
See the jungle when it's wet with rain
Just remember till you're home again
You belong to me
.
Hm, she may be trying to tell me something.
I thought about the songs I'd compiled on my 'Beautiful Bella' playlist and realized that we had the beginnings of a very nice songlist for the reception, excluding a few such as 'Kiss' and 'Like A Virgin' of course.
Emmett would have a fucking field day with that last one.
-LRM—
"There's one more thing I want to be in charge of" I declared as we were having breakfast on Friday.
"What's that?" Bella asked.
"The music for the reception." I answered.
"I just assumed we would hire a band like Rose and Emmett."
I nodded my head. "I have a couple of ideas."
"Let me guess, you're going to surprise me again?"
I grinned. "You're beginning to catch on Miss Swan."
Little did she know that I had Alec working on said surprises.
She started to rattle off the names of songs she wanted included. I went and immediately retrieved my laptop in order to show her the list of songs I'd already compiled using our playlists as a guide.
As soon as she narrowed her eyes at me, I knew I was busted.
"Have you been snooping through my ipod?" She accused.
"I'll never tell." I answered with a guilty smile.
"Edward Cullen" She scolded "You owe me. Hand over your ipod right now."
"Um, why would I do that?"
"You totally saw my 'Edward' playlist didn't you?"
"Yes" I admitted with a grin.
"Well, technically I showed you mine, now you have to show me yours."
She did not just say that.
"Although you didn't have my permission, therefore you're a peeping tom of sorts." She babbled on as only Bella does.
"I told you that I'd show you mine baby, any time. You only have to ask." I said as I stalked closer to her.
"Stop." She demanded. I stopped about three feet from her, giving her my Hollywood smile; however she wouldn't look at me. Instead she held out her hand expectantly. "Hand it over Cullen."
I laughed as I pulled my ipod from my jacket and handed it to her.
Bella's eyes grew wide as she scrolled through the list of songs on my 'Beautiful Bella' playlist.
She gave me a tender look. "You're quite a romantic." She said in a small voice.
I pulled her into my arms then. "You seem to bring that out in me Miss Swan." I bent down and kissed her lips. "Seventy-eight more days until I can call you Mrs. Cullen."
-LRM—
The week just kept getting better when on Friday afternoon we went to Tiffany's to choose our wedding bands. It was another surreal moment when we both had the bands on and I thought about the fact that soon we'd be putting them on at our wedding. I caught Bella's eye, and gave her a meaningful look.
When the significance of the moment registered, we both sat there staring at each other with goofy smiles on our faces. Bella reached over and ran her finger over my ring. The electric hum between us was stronger than ever as I leaned down and gently kissed her ring finger.
After Tiffany's we went back to the apartment. Bella worked on homework while I showered and changed. Tonight I had to pay my dues for our first official date back in January.
I could hear Bella speaking with Emmett as I entered the living room, still straightening my tie.
Emmett looked back and forth between the two of us in surprise. "Are you two going out?"
Bella frowned. "Just Edward." She said before glancing up at me.
Fuck I wish I didn't have to do this.
I turned toward Emmett in an effort to explain. "Back in January, when I took Bella on that first date to Canlis, I had to bribe some guy to get the private room he'd reserved. He didn't want money though; I had to agree to make an appearance at his daughter's sweet-sixteen birthday party."
Emmett eyes were twinkling with delight, "And it's tonight?"
I nodded before shooting Bella an apologetic look.
"It's okay Edward" She smiled, but her eyes still looked sad. "I'm just sorry you had to promise something like that. It was a lovely date though." She reached up and gave me a quick kiss.
I am definitely leaving this party early.
"Well, come on Sissy, you at least can go with us." Emmett urged.
I could tell Bella was going to refuse. There was absolutely no reason she shouldn't go out. "Go Bella. Enjoy yourself. I'll call you as soon as I'm able to leave."
-LRM—
I never did call.
From the time I arrived at the party, I barely had a moment to catch my breath.
I posed for photographs with Katie, the birthday girl, and all her friends. Most were very sweet, but a couple flirted with me incessantly. I posed for photos with the parents of Katie's friends, the party planner, the housekeeper and Katie's dog. Even the catering crew wanted their chance with me.
The mother of one of the friends tried to loosen my tie and undo the top button of my shirt while speaking with me. I forcibly removed her hand before she could get very far. Sidney, not liking the close proximity of a few of the guests, made his presence known then by coming to stand beside me, no longer content to observe from a distance. Even that didn't stop a couple of hands from trying to wander.
I was absolutely miserable, and wishing every minute that I was with Bella.
About forty minutes into the party, an elderly couple arrived. "Sorry we're late. The traffic across town was horrible." The old man announced. Katie went bounding over to them. As it turned out, they were Katie's grandparents.
Unfortunately, as soon as I laid eyes on the grandmother, I recognized her as the lady that groped me during Mass at the Cathedral.
Fucking hell.
As soon as she saw me, she gave me a wink. I knew she remembered. I steered clear of her as best I could after that. I even found myself willing to listen to Katie's Dad drone on about how most people are underinsured just to keep away from the crazy old bat. That's how I found out that Katie's Dad owned a very successful insurance company with several branches up and down the west coast. When he attempted to sell me an 'umbrella' policy, I decided I needed to escape from him as well.
I gave Sidney a slight nod indicating that we would be leaving soon. I slipped out of the room, he followed me. Leaving Sidney at the end of the hallway, I went in search of the bathroom. The first room I checked turned out to be a bedroom. I turned to exit it again, only to find my path blocked by a small figure.
"Need some help?" Katie's grandmother inquired. She was blocking the doorway, making it impossible for me to get past without touching her.
Shit.
"Yes, well, I seem to be in the wrong place. I'm looking for the bathroom, if you'll excuse me." I stood and waited for her to back up.
She just grinned.
I spoke a little more forcefully "Please excuse me; I'd like to get by."
Her grin widened. I frowned. "I'll move, but first, how about a little of what I got the last time we met?" She croaked out.
No fucking way are you getting a second chance to try and ram your tongue down my throat Grandma.
What's the saying? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
"Maybe this time we could play a little 'seven minutes in heaven'." She said as she wiggled her eyebrows at me.
I felt my dick actually attempt to crawl up into my body.
It was a matter of self-preservation.
I was just about to use language that would make my mother very disappointed in me, very disappointed indeed, when Sidney conveniently appeared behind the molester in grandma clothing.
"Is there a problem sir?" He asked.
Grandma turned to look at Sidney, her eyes widening in surprise as she took in the size of him. Instead of backing away though, she became more aggressive. "My oh my, where did you come from handsome?"
No way. Did Sidney actually just blush?
Grandma's hands were on the move again trying to rub all over Sidney's chest, but he managed to capture them fairly easily and hold them by the wrists in one of his. I jumped at the opportunity to get past her unmolested, leaving Sidney to deal with the looney on his own.
Fuck it. He's well-trained, and well-paid.
"I'm headed to the car Sidney." I shouted back to him as I took off.
Finally in the sanctuary of the car, I relaxed.
I never did use the damned rest room.
Sidney arrived a few minutes later, and climbed into the driver's seat. I stared at the back of his head for a while before speaking. "Well?"
"Sir?" He questioned.
"What happened after I left?" I snarked.
Sidney sighed. "As soon as you left, Katie's mother came looking for the old woman. It seems that she mixes up her medication dosages on a regular basis, one side effect being the behavior that we just witnessed. Katie's mother said to tell you she's sorry."
I grunted. "Okay." I said as I shook my head.
I then proceeded to tell Sidney about the incident in the Cathedral months before. He laughed for five fucking minutes.
I scowled.
We drove straight to the pub. I didn't care that I was still in a suit I just wanted to be with Bella. After a stop at the rest room, I went in search of her. I found her with Emmett and Rose in the back playing pool.
I watched in fascination as she unceremoniously kicked Emmett's ass.
She's been holding out on me. I had no idea she was a pool shark.
I watched in amusement as she did a little victory dance, rubbing salt in her brother's wounds. As soon as she noticed me standing there, she was in my arms. All the crazy I'd had to deal with earlier melted away as I looked into those beautiful brown eyes.
"How long have you been lurking there?" She demanded with a smile.
"Long enough to know I'm never playing against you." It was the damn truth.
"How about you be my partner and we'll play against Emmett and Rose?"
"I can do that." I agreed.
I should have been really embarrassed about my poor performance while playing, but I found it difficult to think about that as long as I got to witness Bella bending over the pool table. Depending upon where I was standing, I was treated to either a view of her cleavage or a view of her spectacular ass.
I decided right there and then that I would be purchasing a pool table at my earliest opportunity.
Bella almost salvaged the game, but in the end, her skills weren't enough to pull my sorry ass from the fire.
"So how was the party?" Bella asked once we were back at the apartment.
I relayed the evening's events without going into too much detail. I really wanted to forget about it.
As expected, she had a hearty laugh at my expense.
-LRM—
The next day began well. Unfortunately it didn't stay that way for long. Our ride to Forks with Emmett and Rose had been pleasant enough. We had lunch with Charlie and then relaxed in his living room, needing to kill some time before leaving for class.
I was surprised when my phone rang and I saw Jasper's name on the screen, having just spoken with him the day before.
"Hello"
"Hello Edward. I've got to tell you something that's going to make you angry. You may want to take this in private."
"What are you saying?" I asked as I got up from the sofa and walked briskly toward the back door.
"In plain English, this is going to piss you off." He said forcefully. "Do you remember Jill Richardson?" He asked as I took a seat in one of the chairs on the back porch.
"Who's that?" I asked.
"She was your date for the VMAs last September."
I vaguely remembered who Jasper was talking about. "Okay."
Jasper cleared his throat. "First of all, she's pregnant."
"I fail to see why that is of any interest to me Jasper." I snapped.
"She made a statement this morning implying that you are the baby's father."
I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. "What?" I gasped out.
"Look Edward, she's really far along. The time of conception has to have been pretty close to the date of that awards show." Jasper continued.
"What are you saying Jazz, that you believe this shit?" I barked into the phone.
"No, of course not. I'm just saying that you need to be prepared. There's a chance that the public may buy into this until we're able to prove otherwise."
"Well, fucking demand whatever test we need then." I continued in a raised voice. "Tell me what to do Jazz, and I'll do it."
I was abruptly furious. This meant intense scrutiny by the press once again. I wanted to beat the shit out of something.
"I'll see what else I can find out Edward. Try to relax. We can't fix this in a day, but we can fix it." Jasper tried to calm me, but it was impossible.
"We have to Jasper. The press is going to be brutal over this. They are going to harass Bella. I can't allow it. I won't allow it. She can't go through that again." I clutched at my hair. "Why the hell does this have to happen now?"
"I wish I knew. Hang in there Edward."
"Easier fucking said than done." I snapped before ending the call and shoving the phone in my pocket.
I covered my face with my hands and tried to make sense of this.
What the hell did I do to deserve this?
But I knew the answer. That Richardson woman would have no power over me if I hadn't entered into that stupid agreement with Plateau Studios. Bella is going to be hurt, once again, because of my sheer stupidity.
I will be causing her more pain.
How in the hell can I even tell her about this?
I couldn't have hated myself any more than I did at that moment.
I heard her approach before she spoke, "Edward" She whispered.
I don't deserve her.
"Edward" She said a little louder, and then suddenly her hand was on my shoulder.
I don't deserve her touch. She has always been and will always be too good for me.
I stood abruptly.
How the hell will I be able to explain this situation when I don't even understand it myself? I need to think.
"I can't do this right now Bella." I choked out angrily before storming into the house.
I needed to find a way to fix this before Bella was hurt yet again.
**********************************A/N*****************************
A/N So there you are. Song recs: 'Green Eyes' by Coldplay'; 'Bring Me to Life' by Evanescence; 'You Got Me' by Colbie Callait; 'You Belong To Me' by Dean Martin.
The next chap of LRM will probably be posted within 24 hours. Then we are all caught up. V&V to follow. Remember to watch for the 'sneak peek'.
As ever, I need reviews. Thanking all my wonderful readers ahead of time!