Wow... I can't believe I've made it this far... I've actually got supporters, and I haven't bailed for a whole seven chapters! I feel... UNSTOPPABLE! And before this unstopability goes away, I think I should get started.
DISCLAIMER: NOT EVEN DISCLAIMERS CAN STOP ME! MWAHAHAHAHAHA! *guy in suit with earpiece walks up and tasers me* AAAAHHHHHH!
I *cough* own nothing. *cough cough*
Chapter 7
_
It was dark. Actually, it was extremely dark. The dark seemed to apply physical pressure to his eyes. Oh, wait, that was his stomach. Trevor still couldn't figure out how it did that. His eyes weren't even open yet. Until he opened them. But it was still dark. Trevor was deathley afraid of the dark. Dark, dark, it's dark, it's very dark, gotta get out of the dark, dark, dark, darkness, dark, dark everywhere, it's so dark, always dark, forever dark, it's dark, dark, DARK, lemons, DAARRKK, DAAAAAAAAARRRRRRKKK! Trevor rolled over and plugged in his nightlight again. Better. He felt High-Heels press into his pillow-like stomach. He didn't even notice she had gotten into the bed with him. High-Heels was good at that. One time she had crawled into his stomach and gotten lost for three days, and nobody had noticed until she crawled out at the dinner table that night. Before bed, Trevor and High-Heels took a bath, which he didn't turn down, because it let him examine the water source. for the tub. Trevor had stuck his head underwater to look around for a conveniently placed water source and came back up screaming with his eyes red, and he suddenly knew that the dirty water from the bathtub was emptied out into the Waterway and that that the Waterway conveniently had two entrances to the Overland. Life just works like that sometimes. Now Trevor was lying in the bed, with darkness (DAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRKKK!) everywhere, and High-Heels pressed up against his stomach, waiting for the perfect oppertunity to-
"It's time to escape!" said Trevor, hearing no noise through the soundproof curtains. He put High-Heels in the baby carrier, grabbed his Hello Kitty flashlight and his Dora the Explorer backpack, and set off. The Underlanders did not post guards outside his room, and there were lamps outside providing dim light.
"You step on me foot!" exclaimed High-Heels.
"But you're in the baby carrier!"
"So. Maybe I hovered out of it."
"I've been trying to tell mom that you're possessed." Trevor wondered how to get to the river. He pulled out his iPhone.
"Siri, how do you get to the river?"
"Take the next right, then duck out of sight, for the Underland guards won't let you get very far." Trevor's Siri had been cursed to forever rhyme. He followed her directions until the sound of the water grew very large. Trevor squeezed through the eighth door in the past half hour (his sides were beginning to hurt), and found the river. Except it wasn't a river. It was a suicide river. You know, the kind of river that white water rafters like to use. ("Hey, let's go back and hit that rock again, I've still got some cartilage on my left knee!") Speaking of which, guess what kind of boats they had tied up to the dock? Rubber rafts. They even had canoe paddles in them. The river itself was carrying boulders along as if they weren't even there! Of course, if Trevor fell in, it would probably have a lot harder time with him him. Trevor climbed in and the raft emmediatly took off, guided by Siri to the nearest rat-inhabited beach cave. Unfortunately though, it seemed that the Underlanders noticed his absence (It was hard not to. It's like being in a crowded elevator, but then stepping out.) and were tailing him in a boat. It even had the jolly roger flag on it. Now the Underlanders were acting like hippie pirate cavemen.
Trevor heard them say things like, "AARRRGH! Hoist the sails, yo!"
"Aargh! What are sails, brother?"
"Aargh! I don't know, dude. If you talk out of line again, you'll walk the plank, punk!"
They were easily catching up, but then Siri said, "You have reached your destination, so don't take any hesitation for some mindless coontemplation on why blue whales eat plankton." Trevor jumped out with his flashlight and turned around. He was on a beach with a cave, but unfortunately, there was no rat.
"Siri, now the story's going to be all messed up!"
"I will not be very sorry if I'm not invited to your next party," she said. Trevor walked into something big and hairy and fell backwards.
"AAAAAHHHHH! MOLDY ROCK! Oh no wait, it must be a rat."
Then a voice next to the rock said, "No, I'm the rat. That is a moldy rock."
"AAAAAHHHH! RAT AND MOLDY ROCK!" Trevor screamed.
There *gasp* you have it *gasp*. It took *gasp* so long *gasp*! Done gasping! I would haave to say that, although it was such a lazy one, I think that was the best chapter I've done. And that kind of scares me. Well, since ProProsocutorI.M.E told me to, I'm going to advertise a story! It was written by me and him, and it's on FictionPress. It's called "The Machine: Prologue", and it's something I really was thinking about for a LONG time, and it's going to be a series (I hope) that intercrosses between FictionPress and FanFiction. It's almost done! I really want people to read this, so give it a look if you liked this!
Boom.