A/N: Hi again! This update came sooner than I thought. It's my way of saying thank you to all of you that placed this story in Story Alert and few of you actually placed it in your favorites(I'm honored)! And a big thank you to my reviewers!
I'm already trough the second part of this story, so I will be taking my time to work on that. There's still some things I have to delete, correct and replace. Anyway... second chapter. It just continues from where I left off. I hope you like it!

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach!

Together Alone

Beneath

It was a pretty hot day, the sun kept burning his skin, and there were not enough trees to hide him from that, but even though Toshiro didn't like the heat this walk was kind of relaxing for him. He was glad this girl understood the importance of silence and gave him enough time to think. She never even uttered a word after they started walking and she was walking slightly behind him, giving him enough space and time to calm down. He was grateful for that. Toshiro wasn't talkative guy to begin with. He wasn't the guy who would just spill his problems and ask for an advice, especially not from a girl he hardly knew. But it was strange to him…how she knew what was going on in his head. She must be pretty perspective…hell, I would be too if I had to live with that brother of hers. The man hasn't changed that expression since I've met him. And when he thought about it, this war hasn't been easy for her also. Actually, her whole life wasn't easy for her, at least the parts he knew. And still…she's here, able to smile and work. How?

When they finally arrived in his office Toshiro turned around to look at the girl and saw she was really exhausted. Her face was pale and she had black circles around her eyes.

"Kuchiki?"

"Yes sir?"

"When was the last time you've eaten?"

She was mildly surprised at this question. She didn't even know the time let alone when did she have her last meal.

"I-I don't know."

"Tsk" Frown appeared on his face. He placed his sword on the table and then went straight to the hallway and into another room. Rukia just stood near the entrance not sure what to do exactly. Was she supposed to enter now and work, or leave? She then looked at his office, maybe trying to decipher him or to kill the time. His office was really simple looking one. Nothing too personal was exposed to a mere eye, except maybe for the books that were on shelves behind his dark-wood desk. Before she could even stop herself she was already near them trying to read the covers. They were all neatly placed on the shelves, not one out of order. She recognized Shakespeare, he had a whole set, leather bound. There was also Camus, Rousseau, Confucius and a lot of others she didn't recognize. But before she could even take one of the books she heard steps coming towards her. She only had time to turn her back to bookshelf and act innocent, because in her mind she was doing something she wasn't supposed to do. Toshiro was holding a plate of onigiri that he placed on the smaller table near the sofa, frown still visible on his face.

"I forgot the tea." And again he was heading towards that other room. Rukia was really surprised at this gesture and mildly embarrassed. If she could she would've flash stepped out of his office and bury her head in the ground.

"There. I hope you like green one." He said placing it on the table and then looking at her. She was really embarrassed to the point of blushing. Toshiro couldn't understand why she was so restless. Was the tea bad idea? Who hates tea? "What?"

"N-nothing sir. Green one is fine, but… I'm not really-"

"Tsk! Kuchiki, you will eat. We still have to finish all this paperwork, and I'm not going to be the one responsible if you faint in the middle of it. Is that clear?"

"Y-yes sir!"

He then sat on the sofa and took one himself and started eating, so Rukia did the same but she sat on the opposite end. She would have sat somewhere else, but the only other option was floor, or chairs near his and Matsumoto's table and she wasn't sure how would he react if he saw her eating above the papers they had to complete.

"So, have you found something you like?"

"What?"

"Books. I saw you looking at them. Have you found something you would like to read?" He was now looking at her and again she began to blush, his voice gave a hint of irritation. It's a habit of hers.

"I don't know sir. I only recognized half of the writers."

"Which ones did you recognize?"

"Well… I read Shakespeare and-"

"You read Shakespeare?" She didn't seem the type for Shakespeare to Toshiro.

"Yeah, but…"

"But what?" And she wasn't.

"I didn't quite understand it. I mean, I did like the comedies and histories and even a few poems, but I read only one tragedy and it was confusing for me." And it was. It talked about one thing Rukia never experienced or just maybe didn't understand even if she did.

"Hm… Then what are the others you read that are out there?"

"And I liked?" He just nodded. "One of them is Camus."

"Camus?" A brow was raised. He was a little surprised to hear this.

"Yes sir. I enjoy his writings. Especially The Stranger and The Plague. They both somehow talk about the destiny and that circle of life that we cannot escape, and I find that very interesting."

"I see." He then looked at the window. He didn't picture her this way at all. Maybe it was shallow of him, but…the picture of this girl in his mind was completely different. But after today and this now…it sure did change.

"Sir?"

"Hm?" He was lost in his thoughts again.

"Should we do the papers now?" Rukia said shyly.

"Ah yes. You can sit at Matsumoto's table." He said standing up and walking to his desk. "How many of them are students?"

"One hundred and thirty six are students sir, and we have thirty recruits."

"Very well. I will evaluate half of the students tomorrow at the training ground and the other half the day after that." This is going to be too much work for them. If only I had a lieutenant, and not Matsumoto. I will definitely kill her when I see her! But this was good, this was his escape, the way to stay sane for a little longer. Work.

"I did that already…sir." Silence. Nothing but silence. He wasn't surprised, no, he was fucking shocked! And his face showed it very well. His eyes were open widely and brows raised. He just kept looking at her. Silence. And Rukia was again embarrassed. This man could do that to her easily…make her blush over and over again. She wasn't sure why, but he did.

"You what?" Yes, that was the only thing he could mutter now. There is no way this girl is telling the truth!

"Y-yes sir. I did the evaluation two days ago. That's why Captain Ukitake asked you to assist, because even though I did that, it still needs an approval of a captain." Rukia said switching her gaze constantly from him to floor. She couldn't understand why he was surprised at this.

"H-how?" And he cursed himself in his mind for stuttering. This girl is…What is she? Even though he didn't realize it that moment, but that girl became really interesting to him.

"Oh it wasn't too hard, I did that last year too. But Captain, you still need to approve."

"Fine." Toshiro quickly regained his usual stoic face, bit embarrassed for his reaction. "Then that's what I'll do tomorrow morning. We'll meet at the training ground at 8."

Rukia nodded and started to go through the papers that were placed on Matsumoto's desk. He took one look at her and reacted impulsively.

"Kuchiki…"

"Yes sir?"

"You should go get some sleep, I'll finish this and the rest we'll do tomorrow."

"But Captain-"

"Go home Kuchiki. I can see that you're tired and you will need your strength tomorrow, because it will be a long day. And don't make me repeat myself again!" Authoritative as always, but his voice was much softer than usual, because now he really respected the girl.

"Yes sir!" What else could she say? He was a Captain and this was a direct order. She then started to walk towards the exit, but stopped and turned around.

"Captain?"

"Hm?" Lazily lifting his gaze from stack of papers to look at her.

"Thank you for the food." And then she turned around and left.

He just smiled. He was supposed to thank her, not other way around. She did much more for him today and she was thanking him? But he smiled. He hasn't done that in a long time and he was once again surprised. That girl did that the whole day; just left him surprised and speechless over and over. He then lowered his head to look at the papers, he still had a lot of work to do and it was just little past 2.

The halls were crowded with people, Rukia could not even see where she was going, and if you ask her it had nothing to do with her height, it was just too crowded. She wasn't even sure how could all those people fit in here, there were just too many of them. They were shouting, pushing one another and it was just one massive clatter. She tried to hurry and get to the training grounds as quickly as she could, but so were those people around her. Apparently they were all students that she called yesterday to meet Captain Hitsugaya and her on the training ground. It was near 8 and she was in a hurry, she hated to be late, especially when she had to meet a captain, and she knew that this Captain was very punctual and hated the people that are not. You could see his rage every time Matsumoto was late for captain-lieutenant meetings. She did not want that to happen to her. But there were too many of them around her and she immediately cursed herself in her mind for not coming earlier. So, soon enough, from all the noise and pushing that was happening, she became angry…no scratch that, she was pissed.

"STOP MOVING!" The halls were ringing with her voice. And those students…well, they were all frozen in the spot, nobody moved, not even a finger. When they saw who shouted they were scared, really scared. So they started to move towards the walls, their heads lowered, so this petite lieutenant can pass. And she did. A smirk grew on her face, because she really did enjoy the position and the power it gave her, even though she would never admit that out loud. She then started to walk a bit faster and they all just followed her. When she was nearing the training grounds it looked as she was leading an army. Very scared one, but still an army.

Toshiro was standing there with a couple of students that arrived early. When he saw her, and those scared students behind her, a smirk grow on his face. There she is again, that other Kuchiki, the authoritative one. But as soon as she saw him, the expression became softer, and that smirk she held was now a soft smile.

"Good morning Captain." Small bow and respective expression. She really respected her superiors and knew how to address them properly. That part came from being a noble, you had to learn that.

"Good morning lieutenant." Toshiro slightly nodded and then looked at the students that were now forming a straight line, still scared and still looking at the ground. Toshiro smirked again. It was fun to watch them, they really were scared of her and now even more because he was there. "Is everyone here?"

Rukia then turned around to look at them and nodded. "Yes, I believe this is all of them."

"Very well, then we'll start." He then walked to them and cleared his throat. "I am Hitsugaya Toshiro, the Captain of 10th division and I believe you already know Kuchiki Rukia, lieutenant of division 13." He gestured with his hand towards her and she nodded and few students did the same thing. "I hope you all know the importance of this test, and will cooperate so we can finish this as quickly as we can. Lieutenant Kuchiki already did most of the work, so I'm only left with the approval." That was a compliment and Rukia knew that...

Four hours later they were done. And Toshiro thanked the gods because he was really starting to lose his patience. In his opinion, half of them were useless, maybe even more than that, and the other half was really just little above his "poorly performing" standard. He knew he has to lover the standards, or they would end up with no recruits next year. But, he was not pleased, not pleased at all and it showed. He then turned and started walking towards Rukia who was standing near the fence scribbling something on the piece of paper. When she saw him and his expression, she knew what was going on, so she just smiled in an amusement. He was indeed too strict, and he reminded her of her brother, he was similar in that aspect.

"Captain?"

"It's done." He said sitting on the ground near her. He was exhausted. "At least the approval part…we still have the paperwork left."

"So, how were they?"

"The most part you wrote was correct, and it made my job easier, but…" He placed his head in to his hands.

"That bad?" She said sitting down near him. She was exhausted too, and felt bad for this white-haired Captain. He was doing a job that was meant for at least two captains if not even more. He then turned his head towards her that was still in his hands, so he could see her between his fingers.

"Yeah. But it could've been worse."

"How?" She asked raising a brow.

"Well…I could've been placed in to group with Kenpachi." Rukia was trying not to laugh, captain Kenpachi was still her superior, but she couldn't stop herself. She was laughing out loud, holding her stomach and Toshiro smirked. He made her laugh. He didn't know why that made him happy, but it did. She finally stopped herself, trying to remember who was with her and why she was laughing. Then she wiped the tears and cleared her trout, trying to regain seriousness.

"I am sorry sir." Her voice was still shaken; she was surprising the laughter with all that she had.

"Don't worry, I won't tell him." She smiled. And then he realized it was almost 12 o'clock. "Kuchiki?" He lifted his head and ran his hand trough his white hair, trying to remove few pieces of hair that fell on his face.

"Yes sir?"

"Do you have any work left at your squad?"

"I just need to deliver two packages captain Ukitake left me."

"Then do that and meet me at my office, so we can finish the rest of the paperwork." He said standing up and dusting of his haori. She followed and did the same thing nodding. And then she left with flash step. He was still standing there, near the fence looking in the direction she left, but his thoughts were interrupted.

"Was that lieutenant Kuchiki I just saw?" Female voice, right behind him and a loud one at that matter. When Toshiro turned around he met something familiar that always made him angrier – Matsumoto's bosom! But his head was no longer in them like always and that made him smirk, he was indeed taller now. But soon he remembered that Matsumoto was standing right there, and he hasn't seen her for almost two days…she hasn't worked at all in those two days. His expression changed quickly.

"MATSUMOTO!" Vein started pulsating on his forehead.

"What? Did I catch you in almost compromising position?" Her hands were on her hips and a wide grin appeared on her face.

"Matsumoto, where were you?" He was too irritated to even consider answering that stupid question.

"Oh Captain, well…you see… I had work to do." This was bad, she knew that he will be mad, but this was even worse. He was already pissed at her.

"You had work to do?" SHE HAD WORK TO DO!

"Yes Captain. You see, Kira, Hisagi and H-" No, he had not needed to hear that man's name, and especially not the name that she was about to say.

"I don't care." He started walking away from her, very quickly. "Just get to work…NOW!"

"Yes sir, right away!" This went well… too well! Why? Matsumoto was confused; she expected he would yell at her for at least an hour and then make sure she would do all the paperwork she missed. And that was if she was lucky, not this! But then she decided not to question this…this was a good thing for her, so she just walked away to…well, work. Yes, that's the story she's sticking with.

What the hell Toshiro? You can't be doing this again! Just calm down, calm the fucking down! He felt as if something was inside of him, fighting to get out. It kept suffocating him, making him unable to move, to breathe, to do anything else except grant its freedom. "FUCK THIS!" He was leaning on the wall of some building near his quarters, his head pressed on the wall. And when he shouted the last part his hand almost went through the wall. He couldn't even feel the pain, and it sure didn't help. But then he heard a loud gasp. Someone was standing near him, and he didn't even have a need to turn around, the reiatsu said it all. And even if that wasn't there, he already saw a pattern. Every time in the last two days when he would get angry she was there right after that. He felt sorry for the girl. He was acting like a lunatic every time she saw him.

"Kuchiki…" He still wasn't turning around. He said her name trough his teeth, feeling all the anger transit in his voice. It didn't sound as he wanted to, she had nothing to do with this, but it was the best he could offer right now.

"I'll just leave sir." She was about to flash step out of there, but he stopped her. He was right behind her, grabbing her hand.

"No…" Breathe in…breath out. "Stay." The last part he said almost whispering. This girl will not see him lose it again. She didn't deserve this, it wasn't her fault. And he didn't need her to be scared of him, which she obviously was.

"O-okay!" He then let her go and walked to that wall again, now sitting. She did the same thing, and sat near him, just like this morning. He wasn't feeling well, she could tell. And if she could help him, she will.

"I'm sorry Kuchiki." He said looking at the clear sky above them. He really needed the company, someone who'll understand, someone who won't judge him.

"For what sir?" The girl looked at him and saw the pain, he was exhausted from it. His eyes were really tired, you could see he had too much of this. If he wanted to stop this, he surely didn't know how.

"For this…You keep finding me…like this." He closed his eyes, trying to regain his serious posture, but it didn't work. He only felt worse. Why does he keep doing this to himself? Momo doesn't care why would he? He hasn't even seen her for the last month, if you don't count that incident from 2 nights before. She clearly doesn't care, why does he keep torturing himself like this? And why did he allow this girl beside him to get hurt? She was hurt because of him. Because of his stupid anger. He hurt her.

"I don't mind Captain." Rukia said in a soft tone, looking at the man beside her. Her eyes absorbed all the pain he felt. It was unbearable, even for her, but she didn't show it.

"How can you say that? I attacked you two times now and you say you don't mind? You should be slapping me now, kicking me…something, anything… not act like that." He was now looking at her annoyed. How can she be calm at this? And he then saw her… smiling. She was again smiling.

"Captain…you still don't get it, do you?" She was the one now looking at the sky.

"Get what?"

"It won't just go away on its own. It won't just disappear because you say so."

"What won't?" He was getting really confused now. What is she talking about?

"The pain. It will stay there until you accept it." She then turned around and met his confused teal eyes that were lighter than usual and had a strange glow. "Until you accept to feel it…it will stay. There's no other way around this, there's no shortcuts or ways to skip it…you have to accept it and then you'll know what to do." The gaze never broke. He kept looking at her, at those violet calm eyes. What was this girl? She can just read me like an open book and I still don't get her…not even a little. After a few seconds he came to his senses and began looking at the sky again, Rukia did the same. It was that comfortable silence, just the one they had coming back from that tree yesterday. He liked this silence, but for some reason he had a need to stop it.

"You and I don't seem to finish anything these days." He said with a soft expression. She smiled. It was the truth. The papers were still left unfinished and recruits were still unseated.

"At least we're done with the students."

"Yeah." Her voice was soothing to him. Everything about this girl made him calm. It was weird, but right now he didn't mind. He really needed the peace.

"What was the name of the tragedy?" He was now again looking at her.

"Huh?" Look of confusion appeared on her face when he met her eyes.

"Shakespeare. You said you couldn't understand it…"

"Oh that… It was Romeo and Juliet."

"Really?" He was surprised to hear this and she…well, she blushed again.

"Yeah." Still blushing, and now she lowered her look onto ground, her long eyelashes covering her white cheeks.

"What was the part that confused you?" He was really interested now. This girl understood almost everything she saw, what could it be to confuse even her? He really wanted to know. But she wasn't responding, she just kept looking at the ground, blushing. "Well?" And he really wanted to know.

"It was…it was their love sir." She didn't lift her head, and she began to blush even more. This wasn't something she would tell anybody and she just told it to captain Hitsugaya himself. What the hell are you thinking Rukia?

Love? Toshiro was in mild shock. How can she not understand love? She understood the pain, the responsibilities and many more, but… Love? She never felt it? What was he supposed to say now? He never thought he would bring himself in this situation, let alone try to explain it. Love. Love? Did he understand it? Did he love Momo? Was that love? Or not? He then looked at that petite shinigami near him and wondered…Was she right? Does anyone?

"Hell, no one can understand that. You just, well… feel it." He was serious now, still looking at her. And she lifted her head to meet his eyes and she smiled, but that smile…it never met her eyes, it was a sad one. Toshiro could see it. It was the first time since he met her that he saw sadness clearly written on her face, in her eyes and it made him angry. He didn't like to see her sad. "But you should read Hamlet or King Lear. Especially King Lear, it's a really good tragedy."

"Is that the one with the king and three daughters?"

"Yes. Have you read it?"

"No, but I will now." And the sad smile was gone. He felt relief. And still, he was not questioning his action from moments before.

"And now…" He said standing up. "We should get to work." He offered her a hand and she took it, standing up too.

"Yes sir." And then they nodded and flash stepped into his office.

Toshiro could feel his head dropping on the table. It was near 6pm and he was still writing those stupid papers. He lifted his head to look at Rukia who was sitting at Matsumoto table and saw her writing as well. If she was tired, she sure didn't show it. Since they got in to his office she hasn't said a word. He wasn't sure why, because it wasn't the usual comfortable silence, it was the annoying one. Maybe I did it with that question? Why did I push her to answer? This is stupid, I'll just apologize. He then frowned. For what exactly? For asking her a simple question? Damn it, why do I even care? I don't even know her…at all! I just need to focus on finishing this paper and don't think about irrelevant stuff.

Rukia could feel his gaze on her, but she was too afraid to lift her head to look at him. She cursed herself in her mind for acting like this. She was somehow afraid of this man, not afraid that he would hurt her, just afraid of his words. And whenever situation went to being uncomfortable, she would blush. She never blushed. Okay, maybe she did when Ishin made those almost vulgar comments about Ichigo and her, but who wouldn't blush at that? She knew this silence was really stupid and she was acting immature, but she couldn't help it. This whole situation was stupid. She had to end this, there's nothing to be embarrassed about, she did nothing wrong. So she took a deep breath and lifted her head, but he was no longer looking at her. It didn't matter, she decided to end this stupid silence and that was it.

"Captain?" Her voice was strong and clear.

"Hm?" He lifted his head to look at her.

"Would you mind if we take a break?" He kept looking at her for few seconds, not sure how to answer.

"I need to stretch my legs anyway." That was all he said, and then stood up, walked to the exit and turned around. "Are you coming Kuchiki?" She was confused. But she immediately stood up and hurried towards him.

When they came out from the office Rukia could feel that cold air on her skin. It was much warmer in the office, so she shivered. It did her good. She was beginning to fall asleep in there. But she didn't really need the sleep, she was just overworked. Those papers were really boring and all similar looking, it got really hard to concentrate, everything kept flying around her, and she wasn't even sure what the hell was she reading for most of the time. This walk was indeed a good idea.

Toshiro was walking beside her, his hands on his back. That comfortable silence was back now and he was grateful for it. It was becoming really hard to concentrate back there in his office. He could see her with the corner of his eye and saw that she was much more relaxed now, he was glad.

They just walked like that for at least 15 minutes, until Toshiro finally decided to sit down. They were near the forest, because 10th division barracks were the last one in line, so it wasn't very hard to get there. He sat below some tall and apparently old tree, his head leaning on it. It was so huge you couldn't even see the top even if you take a few steps back. Rukia sat across him, playing with the edge of her kimono. Toshiro looked at her, he never saw her relaxed like this. They were always in some business so he didn't have the time to even look at her. And when they weren't it was because he made a fool of himself…because of his rage. She was really a modest looking girl, even though she was part of a noble family. Most of the times he met her in real world she was silent, or somewhere in back arguing with that substitute. He never even had a chance to talk to her. Never even had a need to. But now…after everything, he was glad he did. He wasn't sure what would happen to him if she hasn't showed up constantly for the last two days calming him down. He really did respect her now. Still, he wasn't really sure why she did that? She had no reason to help him the way she did! But he also felt guilty. Even though she calmed him, he had hurt her…twice. It wasn't his intent to do that, but…that didn't change the fact that he did. He wanted to say something, make her smile, make her laugh like today, but everything in his mind was a blur. Nothing would even begin to make this better, so he just sat there looking at her. She was really something…something he hasn't seen before. She can be a friend when you need one, the one that said all the right words and gave you enough silence when you need it, then turn around and be a very hardworking lieutenant, and then again she could make you fear her in a second. And all of this was very strange to him. He didn't know what this was exactly. Why was he allowing her to see little past that wall he build long time ago? He wasn't the man who would just give his respect and trust to anybody. He barely knew her. I don't understand this, do I trust her? Why? I don't even know her. This can't be trust, I must be deranged to think that!

"Sir?"

"Y-yes Kuchiki?" His thoughts were interrupted now. But he was glad she broke the silence, because those thought kept flying everywhere. He was still looking at her.

"Can I ask you something…personal?" She lifted her head and looked at him. He could see the blush beginning to spread on her face.

"What?" He wasn't sure if he even wanted to know. His face was serious.

"You don't have to respond sir, I just-"

"Ask Kuchiki." Rukia was really embarrassed, he could see it because she was now looking at the ground. She was silent for a few seconds, and then…

"Have you…have you ever felt it?" Still looking at the ground. The words barely slipped her mouth.

"Have I ever felt what Kuchiki?" But he already knew what she was asking. She wasn't responding, she just kept looking at the ground and Toshiro kept looking at her. "You mean…have I ever been in love?" Was he? Was I? She just nodded, but her gaze never left the ground. It wasn't easy for her to ask this, but for some reason she had to. "I…I don't know." And now, he was the one looking at the ground. And he really didn't know the answer to that question. Did he love Momo? Was that love? When she lifted her head she could once again see that sadness on his face. The one she kept seeing these last few days. And now it was her fault, she brought that up. She made him sad.

"I am sorry sir. It wasn't my place to ask you something like this. I apologize sir." She was already on her feet, bowing her head down. What the hell Rukia? Why did I ask him this? Why did I ask a Captain something like this? What is wrong with me? Damn it!

"Kuchiki?"

"Sir, I don't know why I asked you this, I-"

"KUCHIKI!" He was trying to make her look at him. And it worked.

"Sir?"

"Sit down." She just nodded and did what he said. Blush was still visible on her face. "It's okay. You don't have to be so formal…and stop apologizing." Again she nodded. Toshiro remembered how sad she was today and he was angry at himself for not being able to answer her. He wanted to ask her, he wanted to know the story behind that thick veil of sadness. The one he just saw for a moment. She was keeping something, buried, closed…but what, why? He knew that that wasn't his choice, but still... "Now is my turn."

"Turn?"

"Yes. I believe I am now allowed to ask you something personal." A smirk grew on his face. And Rukia was shocked at this. What the…?

"W-what?" Those violet eyes were wide in shock. But he kept his smirk, and continued.

"Well, you should've known…when I allowed you to ask me something that personal that I will want the same opportunity. That is fair, right?" Rukia was silent for few moments, not sure what just happened. Maybe she didn't intent to ask him what she did and maybe it wasn't her place to do that, but still… The man was right; she just gave him the same opportunity. Finally she calmed down.

"Yes. You're right, that is fair. What do you want to know Captain?" He was serious now, took his time observing her, and thought about everything he knew about her. Her posture, her knowledge, her background…it was all too complex. There was no way that he saw everything there is to see about this girl. It would be too simple, too plain. And he knew very well it wasn't his place to ask this, but it bugged him. He couldn't understand this girl, even though she could read him so easily. Maybe he could allow himself this one mistake. This one chance to understand one of the faces Kuchiki Rukia wore. Just maybe…

"Why did you take the position?" And he took it. He knew this wasn't the right thing to do, but he wanted to understand her. It wasn't fair at all…she kept reading him like an open book and kept surprising him ever since that night, he just couldn't predict her movements. He needed to look past that stoic look, to understand that small amount of pain she showed him. He didn't know why, but this girl was very interesting to him. Hell, he spent this whole day with her and never once felt the need to strangle her, and that was a huge thing for Hitsugaya Toshiro.

"What do you mean?"

"The lieutenant seat. You knew Captain Kuchiki will get mad…we all knew. So, why did you take it now?" Rukia was shocked. She never expected this question.

"I…I had to sir."

"Why?" He could see the change in her attitude. Her eyes were no longer in shock and her hands were clenched in fists, her whole body stiffened. That was all it took. He could see it right in front of him. It was only a mask, a good one. He wondered for how long she had to wear it. The way she did that, it sure wasn't easy. Now he could clearly see everything she felt, everything…the pain, the anger and determination. Those eyes told him all.

"I had to sir…for them. For my friends and my brother. I was too weak…too weak to take care of myself. I never wanted…" That was really a sight to see. Toshiro was amazed. He never knew that this small girl had that much strength, that much determination. And those eyes… He could not stop looking at them. "I won't let them risk their lives for me…ever again."

Silence. That was all that was left after this. She really let him in. He wanted to see Kuchiki Rukia and she allowed him. She took that mask down and allowed him to see. Toshiro never stopped looking at those eyes, nor did she in his. And that pain…that pain she bare so gracefully under those violet orbs. She really did accept everything that happened. It was something he hasn't seen for a long time.

And Rukia…she wasn't even trying anymore. She had worked very hard not to let anyone see this, not to see her weaknesses and insecurities, but now…she just let go. She didn't know why, but she had a need to show him, to let her guard down and show him. She could not find better explanation than this. If this was anyone else, anyone else, she would escape from that question and make sure to close every door so nobody could follow.

"I respect that Kuchiki." He knew he had to break this silence, not to allow her to feel it all at once. So he did. "Although, if you knew how much paperwork you will have to do as a lieutenant, I doubt you would accept it." And that familiar smirk crawled on his face. And she? She laughed…once again. He made her do it again. And still, he hasn't questioned himself... Not once! Toshiro then stood up and started walking. "We should go back lieutenant, we still have much work to do." Maybe not enough, at least not after this.

"Yes we do." And she followed. They were again walking in silence, and Rukia kept looking at the sky. It was night already and the sky was so clear that you could almost see every star on it. She used to love the night, it made her calm, especially when she was in the human world. Every problem, every feeling and every doubt that was on her mind would just disappear. The night would wash it away. Somehow it was like none of that existed when she could watch that dark sky. She could escape, hide and breathe freely. She wished for that feeling again. All the nights after the war were the same here.

White. That was all you could see. There were no trees, or hills, just white. She assumed it was ice, because it almost looked like it was sparkling, but it wasn't cold. She was barefoot and still, the ground wasn't cold. There were voices everywhere, surrounding her, like someone was whispering, but she couldn't hear what are they actually saying. She couldn't move, not a muscle, but for some reason it all felt familiar, she felt it in the air. Even though this was actually a threatening situation, she wasn't scared. And the voices were closer now, but still unrecognizable. She wanted to speak, to ask them what they want from her, but for some reason she couldn't. Her mouth was dry and her body numb. She wondered how she could even stand, because her whole body wasn't reacting at all. And then she saw her. It was a beautiful sight. The woman was moving so gracefully, you almost thought she was sliding and not actually walking. She knew her.

"The storm is coming." The woman said now closer to her. She was wearing pure white dress and had a long white hair. She is beautiful like always, Rukia thought. But the woman was sad for some reason; the expression on her face was really disturbing for Rukia. She felt as something was breaking inside of her just because of that expression. Even the air became heavier and she struggled for her breath like it was the last one. "It always comes." If she could cry, she would have, if she could scream from despair she would have done that too, because seeing this woman sad made Rukia devastated. Still, no voice came from her. She wanted to move, come closer to that white-haired woman and tell her everything will be okay, that she will protect her, but…she just stood there. "Rukia, my child…" The woman stretched her arm towards her and Rukia tried to move, tried to grab her hand, but the white that was surrounding her started to blur, everything started to fade and the woman disappeared.

Rukia woke up to find herself in her bed. She stood up as fast as she could and started struggling for air, and tears kept falling to her cheeks, she could not control them, stop them. It wasn't a dream, not actually, and she knew that. She felt it. She could even feel numbness leaving her body slowly. Everything that happened wasn't really clear to her, but that feeling never left her. That sadness. It kept suffocating her like in the dream. Something wasn't right…she wasn't right. Sode no Shirayuki was warning her, she wouldn't have come if it wasn't something important. First thought that crossed her mind was the war, but she knew that wasn't it. Sode no Shirayuki didn't have that kind of information. It had something to do with Rukia herself, that was something that woman knew very well. But what? What did I do? I am trying to be stronger, to protect them. I accepted my destiny. What am I doing wrong? How did I make her so sad?