A/N: And...I'm back! This chapter was very, very difficult. I had to pay attention on every little detail and every reaction. So, everything is there because it has to be.
I am taking this opportunity to thank the ones who read my one-shot. I just had to write it and share it with you! I am glad you liked it! Oh and I started a second story, but that's still far away from being uploaded here(HitsuRuki in AU).
Anyway, thank you for reading this and I hope you'll like it! Next chapter will take longer, but I hope I won't be gone too long!

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach!

Together Alone

I Bleed

There was no way he could sleep, not even a minute. Every second and every detail from last night kept replaying itself in his mind. Why did he act so rash? Why did he have to take away the only thing right and sane in his life right now just because he couldn't control himself? Because of his stupid urges and his stupid desires… There was no way everything could go back to normal after what he had done. There was no way Kuchiki Rukia could look at him, talk to him and be near him like she was before…he took that away from her, from himself.
He shivered when cool morning wind past his cheeks and he let out a deep desperate breath that had been there for a while. His clear teal orbs kept looking at the sky wandering…if they only met earlier. If he only knew of her, he would find her and make sure to spend every second with her…near her. But wondering, wishing…it was a waste of time. How could he know that someone so small, so petite and gentle could change everything in his world? Why was he always late? Always the second choice…
But she wasn't the one to blame here, he was responsible for destroying their so fragile friendship. He was the one who wanted something more and took that choice away from her. He turned around for a second to take a look at the apartment behind him. He thought he heard a noise. Imagination. That was it, and only that. He came back to this balcony when he saw the sleep wasn't coming and still…there was no sign of her. He had to talk to her, explain himself. Apologize. Even though the chances of them getting back to what they used to be were small, almost non-existent, he had to try. What else could he do? And that was the worst part…seeing her. Seeing her and knowing he was late. How could he bare to watch her with him…with anyone, except himself? How can he sleep peacefully knowing the one thing he desired was not his and his only. If he only knew her before…Strange need washed him. The scent, her scent was still on his skin. He needed to make this right.

"Captain?" His mind played a trick on him. For one second he thought it was her voice, but it soon shattered.

"Hm?" He didn't even turn around, just kept looking at the sky above him. The air wasn't even cold enough. That, or he became numb from it.

"What are you doing there?" The voice was too gentle when you take in mind whom it belonged, so he turned around to look at her placing a weak frown. He could see Hisagi in the back entering the bathroom, but he ignored him, casting only one second glance his way. Where is she?

"What do you want Matsumoto?" He said roughly. There is no way he would let his lieutenant find out about him…them. She kept looking at him and he, for once, didn't recognize the look.

"Do you want some tea?" Ignoring. That she did best. She ignored many commands and advices he gave her, especially the questions. He frowned even more and then turned his head back to the view above him. After those nights with Kuchiki Rukia, being in anyone else's company was torture to him. He had to keep that well known posture and answer the way they all expected. It was exhausting, only now he could tell. And just imagining her in anyone else's company made him…angry.

"No." She could hear annoyance in his voice. Something was definitely up with her Captain. She sighted and turned around waving him off. She was not going to get anything out of this man now.

"Suit yourself!" She said casually. But that she was not. She saw him last night. He went on that same balcony, after her. He probably waited for everyone to fell asleep, but not long enough. Something was up, and she was damn sure to find out what. Only thing certain was that it involved him and Kuchiki girl. Friends? He actually made a friend. That hasn't happen since…never actually. She frowned, standing in the kitchen. She knew her Captain very well. She has worked with him for some time now and he never, and that wasn't an understatement, never gained a friend like this, especially not a female friend. This was a huge step for him, she knew that. Hitsugaya Toshiro never knew how to behave around people. Maybe she wasn't the right person to speak about that, but she sure had more connections than him. His lack of skills in that department probably drove him to act so protective about Momo. Yes, she was indeed his childhood friend and he did in fact cared deeply for her, but everything about that friendship made Matsumoto shiver. Let's make something straight here… Matsumoto Rangiku cared about Hinamori, but it could not be measured with the bond she and that Captain shared…never. She always gave him the advantage. Because, even though he may seem like a cold, uninterested man that didn't really care for many things it was not the truth. Hitsugaya Toshiro was the kindest man she knew, and she knew a lot of them. He was always prepared to sacrifice his wellbeing for someone else, especially for Momo. And that was the main problem. He always did that. Matsumoto was all about sacrifice in the name of the friendship, but only if both sides appreciated the sacrifice. If not, then what's the point? For how long will someone bear the pain of the other, if that other doesn't bear his too? For how long until the one bearing it breaks? And she will not allow her Captain to break. So, all in all, that story she knew very well, but… Where is she anyway?

"Kuchiki?" Since Ikkaku and Yumichika haven't came last night they both got a room for themselves. Her Captain and Hisagi were the ones sharing a room. She knocked once and entered. Manners were never a stronger side of Matsumoto Rangiku. When she opened the door she saw the girl standing near the window, apparently in deep thought. She looked a lot like Hitsugaya. If she wasn't sure till this point that something was up, then now she had no doubt in her mind…at all. "What are you doing?" The girl turned around suddenly, startled. Matsumoto saw confusion first, then a small vague smile on her face.

"Nothing. Just thinking…" Rukia said softly. Matsumoto frowned. The two were not an easiest people around, especially not now.

"Yeah, well your tea is getting cold!" She said easily and could see the girl's eyes widening.

"T-Tea?" She said unsurely.

"Yeah, tea. Come on, I told Hisagi to take the table and some futon out on the balcony so we can enjoy ourselves." Matsumoto said smiling. Now the girl was definitely confused, she could see it. "Oh, come on!" She went in the room and pulled her out. First thing she saw was her white-haired Captain turning around to look at them. He seemed as confused and startled as the girl she pulled out from that room few seconds ago. What the fuck is going on here? Hisagi was already near her Captain sitting on one piece of futon. Matsumoto hugged the girl with one hand and went to the balcony. She could see Hitsugaya turning around and lowering his head a little, but other than that he didn't move.

"There, now we can all-" In that moment a high-pitched noise came from the kitchen and Matsumoto clapped her hands. "TEA!" She left Rukia there on the balcony and went to get it as quickly as she could.

"Oi Kuchiki, sit down!" Hisagi said looking at the girl who seemed lost looking at the back of the white-haired Captain near him. That brought her back and she looked at him.

"Y-Yeah." And she sat beside Hisagi, lowering her head to look at her hands. She was trying with all forces not to blush, but the heat kept coming to her cheeks.

"AND I'm back!" Matsumoto almost yelled and she could see her Captain twitch a little, but he still wasn't turning around. She left the plate with tea on the small living room table that was now on the balcony, thanks to Hisagi. There were four cups there. "Oi Captain, I made you some too! Come, sit with us!" She said sitting right beside Rukia who kept looking at her hands.

"I told you that-"

"Yeah, well I made it, so come!" She said nonchalantly. His voice gave away that same hint of irritation she heard when she found him standing there. He sighted.

"Tsk! Fine." That was easy, she thought. He turned around and sat beside Hisagi. She saw he glanced at Kuchiki for a moment then returned his gaze to the tea on the table. Oh, for the love of gods, those two are just…

"So Kuchiki, what do you think?" Matsumoto said looking at the girl beside her. Rukia looked up confused.

"Think? About-"

"The apartment. The guy I met yesterday was kind enough to offer me this."

"Oh…It's nice." Rukia said looking at the living room behind Matsumoto. And Matsumoto grinned.

"You seem to like this balcony the most…" She switched her gaze to her Captain and continued. "…just like my Captain." Hitsugaya looked up immediately and she could see his eyes widening a little. Matsumoto saw that their eyes met for a second before both him and Rukia returned to look at the tea and Rukia had a small blush on her face. Alright, she had a plan here… but Hisagi interrupted suddenly.

"I still don't get how a random guy offered you this! It's pretty big." If she could have, she would slap his tattooed face right that moment, but no… Patience. She shrugged her shoulders grinning and then turned her head to look at Kuchiki who was sitting between her and Hisagi.

"So do you…like the balcony?" When Rukia looked at her she saw that she was making this situation very uncomfortable for the girl, but she had to. "I mean, I saw you last night here…both of you!" Again, Hitsugaya looked up, now even more startled. The man too had a small blush on his face. What on earth…Oh, OH! How could she be that stupid and not see this? She grinned. "So?"

"Damn it Matsumoto, stop talking about the balcony!" Hitsugaya said angrily. Rukia returned to look at her hands.

"Alright, no need to get angry right away. I was just asking." She said. "Geez Captain, you really need to take something for those nerves. You see Kuchiki, I have to work with that man every day! And he's always like this. Does he act like this around you?" Just a chit-chat, nothing else. Yeah, right! Rukia again looked at the girl startled and confused and Matsumoto saw her Captain frowning. "I mean, I heard you two were friends, so-"

"Matsumoto!" His voice was even angrier than it was few moments ago. Hisagi seemed confused. And Rukia…Matsumoto was really making this uncomfortable for her. "Stop molesting her."

"Seriously, you two are friends?" Hisagi said before he could stop himself pointing a finger first at Hitsugaya then at Rukia. Matsumoto laughed and that made the frown on her Captain face even heavier. She heard him taking a deep breath. This whole time the girl, Rukia, sitting next to her remained silent.

"Did anyone hear anything from Ikkaku and Yumichika?" Hitsugaya switched the subject, casting an angry look Hisagi's way. The black-haired lieutenant could feel his breath stopping in his throat. That's what you get for speaking before thinking. "I need to know how their mission went!" Hitsugaya said taking a sip of his tea, with a dark, heavy frown on his face. Matsumoto just rolled her eyes at this.

"Nah, it's still early…they'll come." She said relaxed. "So…" She said happily clapping her hands once. "…what are we going to do today?" She could hear her Captain growling. But Rukia was still silent, the only noise that came from her was the clinging of the tea cup every time she returned it to the table.

"I'm serious Matsumoto! We still don't know anything about our current situation, and I need to find out what they know." He said in a serious tone that made Matsumoto sigh. Work, work, work…That's all he ever does!

"I can go get them!" Rukia said suddenly. Matsumoto almost turned around to look at her, but then she saw that her Captain was now looking at the Kuchiki girl somehow…confused. After only few seconds he looked away and spoke.

"Go." He said quietly. Rukia quickly nodded, stood up and exited the apartment. Toshiro stayed like that for few more moments, but then stood up and spoke again. "I'll go get us something to eat."

There, that's done too! She went by Keigo's apartment to let Ikkaku and Yumichika know that Hitsugaya is looking for them and was now in the park, not really sure is it a good idea to come back to that apartment. This morning was very uncomfortable for her. She tried to stay in her room as long as she could…her plan, to be exact, was till the night fall. But then, Matsumoto came and dragged her out. Then she saw Hitsugaya standing there on the balcony…
Why was she feeling this way? The chatter and kid's voices were present, but she never heard them. The park she was in was crowded with people leading their own lives, their own day. She kept looking at the pair sitting on the bench. They were looking at one another, not even aware of their surroundings and she kept looking at them. They knew, understood what they were feeling, what they were doing, why couldn't she? The boy kept playing with the girls long black hair and she had a sincere smile on her face and was looking only at him. Only at him.
She couldn't take it anymore, so she leaned her head on the tree behind her and closed her eyes. Questions kept replaying in her mind. Why did he kiss her? Why her? Why now? And why did she allow it? Why did she…
She could still feel his cold hand on her face, and his scent was on her, around her…everywhere. The wind washed her face and brought few sun rays along with it. There was no way she could go back. No way. The mere memories made her blush. She allowed it. Everything to play in her head again. Why does she keep torturing herself like that? Questions, questions…everywhere. She didn't have an answer to any of them. One thing was for sure…Captain Hitsugaya Toshiro kissed her. Her. Wasn't he in love with Momo? Wasn't he suffering because of her? Damn it Rukia, why did you allow that?
She wanted more than anything to hide in her inner world beside Sode no Shirayuki, in that storm. Not to see, not to feel, not to think…just be! There was confusion in her, in her heart and that was the only thing Kuchiki Rukia knew nothing about. How to solve it, how to deal with it, how to think clearly for even one second! Unknown. Everything else she could do. If needed she would go to three more wars, just not to deal with this.

He kept looking at her, not sure if he should walk over there and speak. He had to, he knew that much, but…will she accept it? The apology? Does he even want to apologize? This girl confused him to a point he could not think about anything else. Just her. And last night.

"Kuchiki…" Her eyes opened in an instant. She didn't move, didn't look at him, just remained like that and he could see her already blushing.

"Y-Yes Captain?" Why does she keep calling me that? He shook his head…of course she would call him that. He's still her superior. He is still a Captain. But…

"I…" What? What was he supposed to say? That he is sorry for last night? He wasn't. Not actually. That he understands how she feels right now? He doesn't. Not really. He wanted this. This. Her. "I need to speak with you." She still hasn't moved.

"O-Okay." Why won't she look at me? He came closer and sat in front of her, but she still remained like that.

"Kuchiki…" He said more impatiently. "Look at me when I'm talking to you!" She did, right away. He saw that she was uncomfortable, but… Oh, what the hell! "Last night…" The moment he said it, she lowered her head to look at her hands. "Look at me, I need to explain myself!"

"N-No need…Captain!" She said quietly. That did it.

"What do you mean no need?" He said angrily. She twitched a little.

"It's okay… I'm… Just forget about it!"

"Forget about it?" He said looking at her, his eyes slightly widened. "How can you ask me to forget about it?" He got angrier. And she wasn't answering. He sighted. "No, I don't regret last night, if that's what you're wondering!" In that instant she lifted her head to look at him…confused, startled, and still blushing.

"W-Why?" Her voice was breaking, she heard it. Why does she keep feeling like this? And why did that last thing he said made her… "What about…" He kept looking at her not really sure what is she actually saying.

"What?" He said. "What about what Kuchiki?"

"Momo." She said quietly. "I thought…you were in love with her. And I…I-"

"Do you?" He said suddenly. "Do you regret last night?" Her eyes widened and she just kept looking at him for few moments before lowering her head again to look at her hands. He sighted, slightly angry, but…
"I'll take that as a yes. Fine then… I'm sorry I kissed you!" He said bitterly, stood up and walked away. Rukia looked at him, as if trying to say something, but…it was too late, he was already gone.
Why did he even ask her that? He knew very well that she wasn't ready. But it hurt, seeing her so confused and unsure. He had to know. Now he does. And it's worse. She couldn't even look at him… Just fucking great! It's my damn fault! Why did I have to involve myself in this? I already have enough problems as it is!

"No! It's you that said we should go that way! If we didn't then we would get here on time! I-"

"You could've said something! I was only trying to help! You've been here more than I! If it's anyone's fault, it's yours!" The black-haired man said angrily.

"What? How was I supposed to-"

"SHUT UP…both of you!" White-haired man yelled. It was 9 o'clock already, and Matsumoto and Hisagi only now showed up for a mission. The whole Cleaning squad, except for the two, had been waiting in the apartment. Rukia was sitting on the sofa, quiet, even though Ichigo tried to talk to her few times, she didn't say a word. She hasn't spoke to Hitsugaya since this afternoon. She was busy thinking… figuring out what actually happened last night and today. And he…oh, he was a bit angry ever since he came back there and since those two decided to prolong their fun day. Yeah, just a bit! "I do not care whose fault it is! Both of you jeopardized this mission." Matsumoto tried to say something but he just pointed a finger at her and she lowered her head in an instant. "An hour late! An hour? I do not want to hear it Matsumoto!" He was practically hissing at the two.

"So, are we going or what?" Ichigo asked looking at the teal-eyed man before him. And the teal-eyed man just frowned at him. Everyone took that as a sign and started walking out. Rukia dragged Hisagi out of there as soon as she got up from that sofa. She wasn't really up to staying there any longer.

"Matsumoto, get out…NOW!" The woman sighted, and that earned her one more of his death glares. She nodded lazily and went out after everyone else.

"You honestly think you can defeat me? Do not make me laugh shinigami trash!" They were standing in front of him in a fighting stance. The Adjuchas before them was huge and had a hole on his stomach. His skin was grayish and he had a white hollow mask on his face that had a long, thin horns. He was definitely larger than any they saw. When the two started flash stepping to their location he appeared out of nowhere. They were standing in the back alley already on alert, figuring out who will attack first: Adjuchas and his few Gillian's standing behind him, or them.

"Attack only him! When you kill him Gillian's will stop attacking us!" She said quietly to her comrade. He nodded and charged, along with her. The Adjuchas commanded to Gillian's to attack them too and soon Rukia and Hisagi were trying to defend themselves against their Cero and to try to get to their main target. Because of the larger number of Gillian's and their constant Cero shots, they found themselves constantly avoiding the attacks, and not doing much of the offense.
"This won't work!" She mumbled under her breath, already sweaty and she had a cut on her left shoulder. Rukia went back few feet away and stood on the ground. She lifted her katana and commanded.

"Mae Sode no Shirayuki…." She turned it clock-wise, which made the blade in her hands pure white, long white ribbon appearing on the end. Hisagi was still defending from the many Gillian's around them. "HISAGI, GET OUT OF THE WAY!" She yelled. The man quickly flash stepped behind her and she spoke the last command. "Tsugi no mai, Hakuren!" When she said that she pierced the ground four times, and four white ribbons appeared from it. She took a fighting stance and pure-white wave of ice appeared charging in the way where those Gillian's stood. When it hit them, they saw she managed only to freeze three of them, but that was still better than what they were doing few moments ago.

"Nice shikai Kuchiki!" Hisagi said looking at her pure-white katana. She smiled. But quickly after that she turned to look at Adjuchas standing few feet away from them. Hisagi frowned. "We have to split. One has to fight with those things, just to take their attention away from the boss."

"And we have to be careful. There are still people around here." Rukia said breathing heavily. The cut she had on her left shoulder didn't really hurt, but she was still little tired, just like Hisagi.

"I'll take him, you go after Gillian's!" Hisagi quickly said and she nodded. "Alright, let's do this! Kare Kazeshini!" He commanded and his one blade became two kusarigama-like weapons and they were connected with one chain, while the blades looked like pinwheel. They charged.

"Are you going to ignore me the whole night?" She said pouting behind him. They were standing on the same rooftop like last night and he was trying to concentrate in to finding any hint of reiatsu. "It wasn't even my fault… Hisagi-"

"Matsumoto!" He said annoyed. "Stop talking and start working!"

"What's with you today? I was just little late, not a big deal!" She said waving with one hand. "Ever since this morning you are acting weird!" He sighted, but didn't respond. It was stupid in a first place to try to shut her up. She will always do what she wants. "Oi! Are you even listening to me?"

"Leave me alone and concentrate on finding reiatsu we need to fight!"

"Did Kuchiki do something to you? I saw you two-"

"MATSUMOTO!" She was really set on annoying him.

"What? I was just asking." He took one deep breath and returned to watch the area before him. He doesn't need to think about that, about last night and…especially not about today. Maybe it was a bad idea to even wait for his lieutenant. He should've had gone alone. Now he's only going to get more annoyed. "I think she's fighting right now!" Matsumoto said quietly after few moments of silence. He frowned. She was, he could sense her reiatsu that was pretty unstable and that meant only one thing…she was in the middle of a fight.

"I know. You should concentrate and find something so we can fight too!"

"Aren't you worried?" She said standing behind him.

"Why would I be worried?"

"It's only normal Captain. If you care for the girl, you are then worried if she will get hurt or not!" Matsumoto said softly.

"She can take care of herself." He said roughly. Matsumoto grinned.

"I like her!" She said happily, and Hitsugaya only frowned more.

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"I'm just saying…" He remained looking at the horizon before him, not turning around and that grin she had slowly faded away. Something was wrong, she could see. Something was bothering him, but what?
"You know…you're not that kid anymore." She said softly looking at the back of her Captain. She saw him stiffen, but he didn't say a word. "There are still people that fear you, but…there are those that don't. And if you don't trust them they can't trust you. It has to be both sided." He still wasn't turning around, but she saw him relaxing, and after few moments she spoke again. She needed to help him, make this right. "If you did something, just apologize."

"What makes you think it was my fault!" He said roughly. She smiled.

"Is it worth that much? That much that you endanger your friendship with…her?" Silence. She grinned. He was too easy sometimes. "Be a man for once Captain and say you're sorry!" She said mockingly.

"Tsk! You are annoying me!" He said. And Matsumoto laughed. "Will you even work this evening?"

"Of course I will! But-"

"Shit!" His eyes widened and he stood up straight looking somewhere.

"Go!" She said quickly and he just nodded and flash stepped in an instant. She remained there looking in the direction he went for a moment, small smile creeping on her cheeks and she whispered to herself. "He does like her. I knew it!" And she flash stepped after him.

"…and then I ate it! It really wasn't hard to make." The faces of the men around her were really bothersome. They were trying with all their strength not to puke or run somewhere.

"That's…um, great Inoue." Ichigo said trying to calm his stomach. He turned around quickly to Ishida, but Ishida shook his head.

"Still nothing. But Kuchiki-san is fighting." He said narrowing his eyes.

"Yeah, I can sense that." Ichigo said looking ahead of him. "I can't believe there's not a single hollow on the radar. This is boring."

"Should I throw the bait?"

"No! Don't even think about it! The last time you did that, we had a town full of Menos!" Ichigo said angrily.

"Hm, I think that was your reiatsu, not me!" Ishida said offended, lifting up his glasses. "The bait I threw wasn't even that strong."

"Do not blame that on me. You were the one that said Oh let's make a competition, so it's your fault. I didn't re-" He stopped and the others did too.

"Kuchiki-san!" Orihime exclaimed. But before the others could even react Ichigo was already gone in the direction her reiatsu called him. Ishida frowned.

"I'll go after him and you two-"

"Yeah, we get it!" Chad said and Ishida just nodded and followed the orange-head man.

"RUKIA!" He shouted, flash stepping near the three silhouettes that were in the back alley. He started running to them, but stopped. Froze in the spot. He just remained looking at them, specifically at the one with white hair that was kneeling near the Rukia's fallen body. The expression, the eyes, his composure…everything screamed something to him. He shook his head, remembering who was actually lying on the ground in the pool of blood and started walking slowly to them, not sure if he even belonged there. Did he? He stopped right beside them. Her face. It was pale, paler than usual, if that's even possible. Her hair was slick, soaked in her own blood. And the blood? It was everywhere. He couldn't even see from where it was flowing. The man kneeling beside her had her blood on his hands that were slightly glowing. Kido healing, he remembered. It was a great contrast. His white hair didn't really match with the blood around him. Why was he even here? He couldn't say a word. His look fell on the petite body near the white-haired man. She was practically thorn apart.

"Kurosaki, where's Inoue?" That snapped him out of it.

"S-She-" He tried.

"Bring her. NOW!" The man yelled, pricing him with his teal eyes, but quickly he returned to the fallen body near him, continuing with his healing. Ichigo couldn't move.

"I'll go!" The voice behind him said. Ichigo turned around quickly and saw Ishida nodding him and disappearing quickly after that. He turned around again and just now noticed the black-haired lieutenant standing there, looking at Rukia in shock, Matsumoto right beside him. Ichigo could still feel Rukia's reiatsu, but it was falling. Quickly. He fell to his knees and stared at her blood-soaked body. Just now he saw she had a long slash on her stomach, her shinigami outfit thorn, small parts of her pale, blood-soaked skin showing. He could feel his stomach turning. She was thorn. Slashed, almost in two parts. The man beside her didn't move. Ichigo wasn't even sure if he even breathed. His face was screaming pain, but his hands were steady and Ichigo could see small amounts of sweat pouring on his forehead. He could see the man was concentrating, the hardest he could, but the Kido couldn't heal her fast enough.

"Kuchiki-san!" The girl screamed running to them. Her face showed horror, pain, fear, as she fell beside Rukia's body. Hitsugaya quickly moved allowing her to come near. He stood up and went only one step back, still looking at the girl that was dying… No, she won't die, Ichigo thought. He didn't move. He could just stare at the Captain near him. Nothing else.

"…Souten Kisshun!" That's the only thing he heard, before the orange see-through shield appeared above Rukia.

"I-I am sorry sir. It was my fault. She…I…lost balance." Hisagi muttered. Hitsugaya didn't move, or even acknowledge the man talking beside him. Matsumoto placed the hand on Hisagi's shoulder as if telling him it's better to be quiet now. It was. She knew. Her Captain was a ticking bomb.

"I-Inoue? What…happened?" The moment they all heard her voice it was as the air became lighter, easier to breathe.

"Rukia?" The man knelt again beside her, and Ichigo only remained looking at them. "What happened? Can you breathe?" Hitsugaya said quickly. Rukia turned to look at him.

"A-Adjuchas…Gillian's…" She muttered.

"It's okay. Rest now, you'll tell me later." Toshiro said quietly after seeing her slowly losing consciousness.