Chapter 4: They Could of Have it All

Kurt Hummel has never held a grudge against Rachel Berry. They were truly each other's best friends. It took him a while to get over the fact that he never got to New York. He got accepted to UCLA for fashion studies. He never pushed himself to talk to Rachel. He knew she was hurting after what happened after they graduated.

But now he wasn't sure what to think. He still thought about the little girl that was sitting next to Rachel Berry. She couldn't be any niece since she was an only child.

He decides to text Rachel in which he hasn't done in so long.

Kurt- Hey, Diva. How are you? I know you're in town. Finn's upset so I just wanted to make sure you're okay. We have a lot of catching up to do.

He sent the text message. He waits for quite a while for a response.

Rachel-Hello, Kurt. I'm okay.

That was weird. It sounds like Rachel didn't want to start a conversation through text message. Kurt was always use to her rambling about her solos or her future in New York. This was different.

Kurt-Are you sure you're okay, Rachel? I'd like to meet you today or something if that's alright.

Rachel-You're not going to give up are you? Fine, we can meet at Breadsticks but don't bring your brother!

That text message has satisfied Kurt. His mission was to fix things between his best friend and brother.

No matter what it takes.

She explained to her fathers what was going on and asked if they could watch Ashley. They've agreed to and let her go off to dinner with an old friend.

There's no reason for Rachel to be angry with Kurt. There's no reason to hold a grudge.

She owed it to Kurt anyways. They hugged each other as they met up at Breadsticks and got a table for two. They ordered and ate dinner.

"How are you?" Kurt asked again.

"I'm fine. I graduated from NYADA." Rachel smiles.

"As I remember clearly, you said you didn't want to come back here, once you start a new life in New York. What happened?" Kurt asked.

Rachel looks down. "Rachel?"

"Can I trust you?" Rachel asked. "You know since we're best friends or were?"

"We're still best friends, honey. That hasn't changed." Kurt says. Rachel nods and clears her throat. "Finn is so angry with me because I've been ignoring him. I received every voice mail, text messages, and calls but I couldn't answer him. I couldn't talk to him..After what he's done...after what we done."

Kurt raised an eyebrow. "I'm not sure if I'm following..."

"That night before he sent me to the train we had unprotected sex. I was pregnant and I couldn't tell him. I couldn't tell anyone. So, I tried to balance college being a young pregnant eighteen years old. It wasn't easy but thankfully I had my fathers with me. Then I had to hire nannies and babysitters to help me with my child...the little girl you saw at the park yesterday." Rachel says. She takes a deep breath. "I didn't want to tell Finn because he was going to the army. There was no way he could be part of his child's life. It wasn't fair to him to be part of that pressure. Being a father and fighting in the army. I didn't want that for him."

"Diva..." Kurt's voice cracked. He was close to tears.

"No, Kurt." Rachel fought. "I missed so much in my daughter's life. I didn't want that to happen anymore. I came here for good because I want to watch my daughter grow up. She shouldn't be raised by nannies or babysitters because I'm living my dream. I don't want to be those selfish mothers." Rachel says, crying. "Finn called me selfish because I wouldn't tell him the reason why I came back."

"Do you want me to talk to him?" Kurt asked.

"There's no use..." Rachel says.

"Rachel Berry...don't talk like that." Kurt cried. "Finn Hudson is so in love with you that he couldn't move on. I'm sure he told you everything that he couldn't date any other woman. You were always on his mind."

"How? He's too busy fighting in the army to have me on his mind."

He's an idiot. "Well, he loves you Rachel . He's also missed you so very much. Give him a chance and tell him about your daughter. What's her name? She looks so much like you. I bet she has a killer voice."

Rachel laughs. "Her name is Ashley Nicole Berry. She's very timid. She's not at all like me. She sure has her daddy's height but has a fantastic voice. She doesn't sing constantly but only around family, which is me, and my daddies."

"Tell Finn, Rachel. He deserves to know." Kurt says. "I'll be there when you tell him." Rachel nods and reaches over to hug Kurt. "You're strong, Rachel Berry."

That night everyone was asleep but Rachel. She couldn't stop thinking of the events she's had in Lima since she came back. It was making her head hurt. Her fathers and even Kurt told her to tell Finn about Ashley but she just can't. It would break his heart and her heart.

As she was thinking, she heard someone throwing little rocks, or something at her window. It was one-thirty a.m. Rachel slowly gets up and puts on the light on the night stand. She only looks out to see Finn with pajamas on. Rachel shook her head.

She read Finn's lips. "Please." He was pleading. Rachel grabs a robe and slowly heads downstairs. She couldn't leave poor Finn standing outside. She closes the door behind her and she and Finn sit on the front steps of the house.

Finn looks down and hasn't looked at Rachel. Rachel looks straight forward. Neither of them has said a word. "I was out of line for yelling at you yesterday."

"I told you not to show up unannounced." Rachel cries. "You're here unannounced. And it's one-thirty in the morning."

"I know, I know...I'm sorry." Finn apologizes. "How many times do I have to apologize to get you back into my life?!" Finn cried. He took deep breaths. "I have something important to tell you. Something really important that you have to listen." Finn says.

Rachel looks at him. "Go on..."

"I backed out of the army just right after I put you on the train. I couldn't stand seeing my mother being devastated. She was scared to lose me like she lost my dad. I wanted to go after you , Rach but I couldn't! I'm so sorry..I ruined it for us. I ruined everything!"

Rachel places a hand on his shoulder. "All this time I thought you were fighting in the army. All this time I kept picturing you getting shot by guns or whatever it is that you do. All this time I was scared to death. Now I know the truth."

"Why haven't you answered me?" Finn asked.

I can't do this now. Not here. Not when it's late at night. Rachel closes her eyes, trying to fight back tears. "It's late. You're tired, I'm tired, and we should both go back to bed. You should go home." She stood up and almost opened the door but was stopped by Finn.

Finn then thought about the little girl he saw at the park. He thought about how much she resembles to Rachel. "Is this about the girl who was with you at the park?" Finn asked. "She's precious. She looks so much like you." What he really wanted to say was she looks so much like him and her. "Rachel?" He asked.

She then turns around. "I don't know what you're talking about. Goodnight, Finn." She goes back inside the house and locks the door behind her.

She was leaning against the door as she let tears streaming down her face.

She now knew the truth. Finn Hudson never set foot in the army. Rachel felt her heartbreak. She doesn't know why she keeps pushing him away.

Now that she knows everything she couldn't help but think;

They could have had it all.