Grace, Logan, Kurt, Scott, and Cookie stole glances at the small TV set on the table while they did food prep. Loki stood over by the sink, peeling potatoes, watching the group watch TV.

"Why don't you come over here and join us?" Logan called over to him.

"I have seen enough of New York, I need not be reminded of what it looks like."

"Oh look, it's Tony Stark, he's in the suit!" Cookie cried, "Oh my gawd he's gorgeous."

Loki winced at the mention of the name, looked up to see Grace give him a half-hearted smile which he returned. She got up from the table with a tray of foil wrapped sweet potatoes, walked to one of the industrial ovens and slid the tray inside, then ambled over and stood beside Loki who gave her a gentle nudge with his elbow.

"Don't mind Cookie, Stark has got nothing on you." She winked at Loki and chuckled. "Have you thought of what you're thankful for today?"

Loki looked at her, a wry smile on his lips, "You know full well what I am most thankful for." He touched his fingers to her cheek as she leaned on the counter watching the TV from across the room feeling her smile, the heat from her skin as a blush rose to it.

"Well the feeling is mutual."

Loki slid the knife through the potato on the chopping board before him, "Oh?"

She glanced up at him, "Yes, you sound surprised."

Loki's eyes slid to hers, "Thankful is not a word I often associate with myself."

She touched his arm, "You'll get used to it." and returned to the kitchen table where she sat down beside Kurt who grinned and handed her another sweet potato.

The tables in the great hall had been set by the remaining students. Candles on pedestals with colorful maple leaf garlands woven around them sat in the centers. A roaring fire in the massive main fireplace threw heat across the room where everyone had finally taken their seats. It had been a gargantuan effort but with the students pitching in, they had managed to bring everything together with nearly perfect timing.

Grace sat on one side of Loki, Kurt on the opposite. The students, remaining faculty, passing dishes, serving, talking, until Ororo tapped her glass with her fork and the hall fell silent.

"Before we begin, let's join hands and recall all we're thankful for this holiday season. Life is precious, if we only learn to recognize this, we can see how truly blessed we are here today."

Loki had interlaced his fingers with hers, the brief intimacy flushing her from head to toe. They broke the connection then as the hall erupted again in talk and laughter accompanied by the clink of glass, clang of metal.

"It is a good thing, Thanksgiving." Kurt held up his glass of wine and bid Loki and those around them do the same, "A toast to my family, you are far more dan friends to me, Prost!" Loki raised his glass of wine, "Skoal." in response, the rest to their respective sayings. As he drained his glass, an undeniable feeling, stronger than he'd had before, broke over him. If it had been unsure before, the night had cemented it, this was home, he had been seeking a place where he could feel wanted, loved even, if it was possible he'd found it all here. He paused. Not all, he was still without Sarah, still unable to join her in her time of need. He sat back in his chair and felt a hand on his shoulder, turning to see the other dilemma in his life gazing up at him with such admiration and concern that he had to sit forward and refill his wine glass to stop himself from leaning over and kissing her, as he tried to ignore the aching throb in his groin the mere thought of touching her had brought over him.

Students and faculty were beginning to bring their dishes to the clean up carts. Loki took her plate for her and his own as well, she carrying the glasses and silverware. After they'd put them in the carts, she turned to Loki,

"Are you going to come to the common room and watch "A Christmas Carol"?"

He shook his head, "No, I am tired, I believe I shall retire for the evening."

She looked crestfallen, "You want company?" and worse when he shook his head again.

"No Grace, do not be upset. I just wish to sleep, perhaps be alone with my thoughts."

She nodded, in a quiet voice, "Thinking about Sarah?"

"Yes." he watched her wring her gloved hands absently and at once wrapped his arms around her neck while she encircled his waist with hers, felt him kiss the top of her head, take a deep breath.

"I will talk to you tomorrow."

"Promise?"

"As always."

He saw her from the great hall and watched her walk down the hallway towards the common room before he trudged up the stairs with his thoughts.

The mansion had gone silent by eleven thirty. Students retiring to their rooms, faculty turned in for the evening. Light snow was falling, flurries. Loki had drifted into a dreamless sleep, fueled by the wine and a full stomach. He'd not had more than five minutes to ponder much beyond the time on the clock sitting on the nightstand before his eyes had closed.

The radiator near the window had thumped as the heat began to circulate throughout the floors and it pulled him to consciousness. He raised himself on one elbow and looked out the window at the snow drifting by the windowpane, peered at the time on the clock and lay back down on the pillow, letting his mind drift further and further until with effort he was able to find Sarah.

He sat up, face drawn in a mad rage, he swung his legs over the floor, his hands raking his hair from his face, lips drawn in a grimace. He had seen Sarah in a kitchen with the only light over the sink for illumination. He had been made to see Thor put his hand behind Sarah's head, drawing her into a deep kiss, leaning over her swollen belly. She had not pushed him from her, had given in to passion, returning the kiss, her hands pulling him by the shoulders, and he had broken the connection.

He pulled his boots on, leaned down and pulled the duffel from underneath his bed. It still held the old clothes he'd arrived with. He set it on the bed, took the long jacket that hung on the back of his door and shrugged it on, grabbed the duffel and slung it over his shoulder, shutting the door softly as he walked out into the hallway and towards the stairs to the foyer below.

Grace had set up her chart for next week and was studying it, unable to sleep after the excitement of the festivities and the exchange between Loki and herself. The kiss on the head, the hug she never wanted to break. They were all serving to make her head swim. She rubbed her hands together and held them out to the small fire she'd started when she came upstairs. Her gloves sat next to the chart where she'd left them when she walked into her rooms. She stood up to stretch and ambled over to the window to watch the snow. Movement a ways down the drive caught her eye and she rubbed the window to clear the frost from it. Someone was walking down the driveway in the snow. She cupped her hands to the window to shut out the ambient light so she could see better.

She whirled around so quickly that she nearly fell forward over the arm of the nearest easy chair, she pivoted around it and scrambled to pull a pair of jeans from the hamper while she tossed her nightgown onto the bed. She wrestled her bra on, yanked up her jeans and threw on the t-shirt she'd worn that morning while working, dragged her boots from under her bed and shoved them on her feet, all the while watching out the window. She grabbed her coat from the back of her door and ran out leaving the door wide open, scrambling down the stairs into the foyer, out the front door into the courtyard and the snowy twilight.

Loki heard the crunch of the ice and snow beneath his boots, his breath coming out in white mist as he kept up a quick pace towards the front gate some distant. The crunch of another pair of boots in the distance and a whispered shout, "Loki!" brought him up short. "Where are you going?" She hissed.

"I am going to New York, return to the mansion, Grace." Loki looked over his shoulder.

"Do you know what they'll do to you if you show up in Manhattan alone?" She took another step towards him, her feet slipping on the snowy pavement. Loki resumed his pace, long strides forcing her to trot in the snow at the side of the drive.

"Loki, stop please!" She shouted, beyond caring who heard her.

"Loki stopped and turned around, "I am losing her!" His face was contorted in rage, anguish,

"My brother seeks to take my place in her heart. I have seen them in the passion of a kiss. I can stand by and watch no longer."

He turned back and continued on.

"Loki, wait," she reached out a hand to grab his arm and realized her hands were bare, she snatched them back, "I can't touch you, please."

He spun around then, stalked up to her until he was inches from her face, "Even if you could touch me, you could not stop me." he backed away from her, ready to resume his path but she put her hand out, hovering above his arm, "Think of what you've built here, the friends you've made, the lives you've touched. You've told me that this was the happiest you'd ever been being here with us. Maybe this is where you're supposed to be."

Without warning, his hands shot out, gripping hers tightly. She cried out as if struck and made to pull away but he held her fast for a few moments more before releasing her with a great indrawn breath. She cradled her hands to her chest,

"Why did you do that? You know it works both ways."

Thinking of nothing but putting distance between herself and Loki, she turned to run, slipping in the snow and landing on her hands and knees hard, panting.

Seconds passed, then Loki bent over to help her up.

"Don't touch me," She growled remaining on the ground until she heard his voice, soft, "I am so sorry, Grace."

The tears rolled unchecked down her nose to drip onto the snow below, "I've avoided this all my life. I never wanted to see inside anyone. I can't pick and choose the thoughts I want to see, they all come at me like a tidal wave, relentless." She was crying harder now, her knees giving way as she started to sink to the ground. She felt a hand at her back, shaking it off at first then letting him help her to her feet where she brushed the snow from her jeans, turned to look at him once more then whirled around and started off to return to the mansion, so hurt, so angry that she didn't bother even to see if he was following her. Once in the foyer, she started up the stairs, only getting half way before she stopped, refusing to face him, "Why did you do that? Take my hands when you knew what was going to happen?"

Loki put his hand on the newel post at the bottom of the stairs, "I wished to know what you stood to gain by keeping me here."

"And did you get an answer?" Even from a distance, he could see her trembling,

"Yes."

She said nothing in response, simply resumed walking up the stairs, leaving Loki at the bottom, the front door wide open. Loki glanced out the door, then up the stairs and put his forehead against the post in his hands.

Grace heard the front door slam shut, refusing to go to the window, instead sitting on the bed, her arms wrapped around her, listening to the click and hiss of the radiator. She had seen into his thoughts as well. The times he had struggled to maintain a safe distance from her, the night he had admitted to himself that he was falling in love, how close he'd come to kissing her on more than one occasion, the urge tonight being the strongest.

She put her hands to her temples in search of a way to stop the thoughts, the images. He was gone. She should have run to Ororo's office and told her he was leaving but maybe in light of what she now knew, it was better like this, safer. She had thought that her infatuation only went one way, she had certainly not imagined that he shared it and the realization aroused and terrified her all at once. By the time she managed to close her eyes in sleep, the sky was beginning to lighten outside her window.

When she saw Loki sitting with Kurt, their heads bowed together in conversation, she nearly dropped her breakfast tray, Kitty at her ear asking her if she was alright, just about finishing the job. She sat her tray down on the nearest table, fighting the urge to walk up to Loki and slap him on principal.

"I'm fine. I had a long night."

Kitty sat down with her, "Are we going to go shopping like you said?"

Grace thought about it for a minute, "You know what, yeah we will." anything to be away from the man who was currently holding her heart in his hand.

She picked up her knife and was in the process of spreading butter on her toast when she heard the chair to her right scrape the floor.

"Miss Pryde, would you excuse us for a moment, I wish to talk to Grace."

She held the knife in mid air, not daring to look left to Kitty or right to Loki.

"Uh, sure, Grace I'll talk to you in a few, okay?" Grace watched Kitty walk away then heard in Loki's voice close in her ear.

"You are surprised to see me." She jumped, closed her eyes, wanting to turn and kiss him, hit him.

She pursed her lips together, trying to stop any words from escaping even though the thoughts were coming hard and fast.

"Will you not speak to me then?"

She gripped the knife tightly, angry that she was shaking, heard the chair scrape against the floor again as he started to stand up.

"What made you stay?" She tried to keep her voice steady.

She turned towards him then, sorry that she had, their faces inches from one another. She studied his face, caught his gaze, holding it for longer than she should have, then backing away from him.

"You have." He looked down at the table then at her again. "Why do I have the feeling that you are not happy to see that I stayed last night?"

"I'm ecstatic, I'm just keeping it all inside."

He sat down beside her. "Your actions speak otherwise."

She shook her head and looked at him, "What do you want me to do, jump up and down and yell and scream? "

"What you want to do and what you shall do are two entirely different things, are they not?"

She bit her lip, "I could say the same for you."

He chuckled and she could see a wry smile form on his face, "Indeed, a wise reply"

"I couldn't sleep last night because of you. Of course I'm surprised to see you. I expected you to be half way to New York by now."

"Is that what you would have preferred?" He sat back in the chair.

"No,"

He stood back up, "That is all I wished to know."

Before he could walk away, she made a small sound, a whine in her throat and he paused,

"Loki, I've never been this close to anyone before and I'm scared."

He furtively raised a hand and brushed his fingers against her cheek. She had all she could do not to lean into his touch, "I will not hurt you, Grace, your happiness is my happiness. We are still friends, are we not?"

She nodded, a small smile on her face, "Still friends." glancing up to see him return the smile and then he was gone. She could no longer admit that she cared what had happened in the past between Sarah and Loki. As mad as she had been at him, her heart had wanted to break when she'd heard the door close last night, thinking he was heading to find someone who didn't care about him like she did, sure about her assessment. Sarah would have made every effort to come and see him, if she had cared by even half. Grace was sure that if it had been her, she would have moved Heaven and Earth to be with him. Her gaze flickered over to where he'd resumed his seat beside Kurt, his eyes meeting hers briefly, speaking volumes without a word being uttered. She felt exhilarated, as if she could fly, though she had to temper her enthusiasm, she wanted to shout from the rooftops, tell the whole world that she was in love.

Kitty and Grace pulled into the Berkshire shopping center at about ten that morning. They were forced to park a distance away.

"Well at least it's not snowing." Kitty grumbled as they shuffled through the slush at the curb and into the mall entrance.

"Do we have a direction here?" Grace studied the stores lined up before her, spying a Joann's Fabric store at the far end of the wing they were standing in and was suddenly struck by an idea.

"Follow me."

She held the skein of green and soft yellow yarn in her hand. It had been years since she had touched a pair of knitting needles. She'd left them behind with her last foster home. Grandmother Ellis had been the only one to pay attention to her and at fifteen that had meant a lot to a troubled young girl. She'd shown her how to knit and it had stayed with her, even now she would see a pretty skein of yarn and feel the urge to buy a pair of needles but this time she had a purpose. She took another skein in her hands, looking at the label on the side. "Size seven needles." She mumbled.

"Huh?" Kitty was fingering another skein in the rack before her.

"Just saying the size needle I need."

Kitty had picked up a skein of yarn in pale blues and browns, "You think you could teach me to knit?"

Grace nodded, "I could teach you, yeah. It's been a long time since I've done it though. I'm going to grab a book to refresh my memory."

"What size needles would I need?" Kitty was peering at the label, turning the skein over and over until Grace took it from her and read it.

"Seven like mine, come on, if you're serious, I'll help you."

By four that afternoon, they were tired and hungry. They put their day's purchases in the van and got in.

"Well do you want to find someplace to eat or head back to the school?" Grace asked as she put the van in gear.

"There's that Boston Market on Newtown road."

Grace nodded, "That's fine with me."

They sat in the busy restaurant talking about their purchases over the din of holiday shoppers.

"I know Kurt was talking about how dog-eared the cover of his bible was getting so I know he'll like the cover I got for him."

Kitty took a drink of her lemonade, "I hope I got Piotr's size right, I told him I was going to replace that old hoodie of his." She took a bite of her chicken, "What are you going to make with the yarn you bought?"

Grace colored at the question, "Oh it's going to sound corny."

Kitty smiled and waved her hand, "Come on, tell me."

"I'm knitting a scarf for someone." Grace didn't look up but kept her attention on her plate.

"For Loki?"

She tried to fight the smile that was forcing its way out, "Yeah, corny huh?"

"Corny," Kitty wrinkled her nose, "But sweet. I'm sure he'll like it. He'd like anything you make."

"Oh?" She fiddled with the food on her plate, "Why do you say that?"

"Well, duh, he's head over heels for you, he follows you around like a puppy. I honestly can't believe it when everyone says he's like a god or something. I mean really, he's like a big teenager sometimes."

"That's because he's a man, you know they don't ever age mentally past sixteen, and honestly you're seeing things, Kit." Grace shook her head, watched a family with Santa hats walk past, singing "Jingle Bells" at the top of their lungs.

"Yes I am seeing things, I'm seeing you cuddling up with him on movie nights, taking dinner together, teasing each other, that poetry night when he read the hottest poem directly to you." Kitty observed Grace's movements becoming more exaggerated and she laughed, "And you are still going to deny it?"

"Kitty, you do know he's seeing someone right?"

Kitty's head popped up, "From the school?"

"No she's in New York, she's an agent with S.H.I.E.L.D."

"That Hollywood operation?" Kitty snorted, "All they're interested in is making a big show of things. All the super hero stuff with Captain America and Iron Man.."

"And Loki's brother, I think they did exceptionally well last summer don't you?" She closed her eyes at the memory of what she'd seen through Loki's twisted thoughts, the pain he'd gone through, the despair, the ever agonizing presence of The Other. She shook her head to clear it.

"So then he's seeing this woman? I've never seen her visit him at school and he hasn't gone to see her has he?"

"No," Grace finished the last of her iced tea, "He hasn't seen her in months and she hasn't made the effort to come see him either."

"Why hasn't he gone to see her?" Kitty piled her tray with her trash and stood up, Grace following suit.

"He's supposed to stay away from Manhattan per the director of S.H.I.E.L.D. I don't know why." She lied, feeling a bit dirty for it though she wanted to keep Loki's reputation relatively intact at the school.

"But she's allowed to visit the school right?"

Grace shrugged, "I would assume so unless the director has her corralled too."

Kitty snapped her fingers as they walked across the parking lot to the van, "Then as far as I'm concerned she fumbled the ball, he's fair game. You get yourself a piece of that."

Grace feigned shock, "How crude!" smiled, "I'd say let's keep this a secret but I guess it's too late for that huh?"

Kitty hauled herself up into the van, grabbing the seat belt and locking herself in, "I think the only ones in the school that don't know you two are an item are you and him."

Grace pulled out of the parking lot onto the road, "Just let's not talk about it in public, okay? I don't want to have rumors going around the school."

Kitty drew her fingers across her lips, "Zipped and locked, but I'm warning you the rumors are already out there."

Grace rolled her eyes, "I'll just have to dispel them, won't I."

"Good luck with that." Kitty shoved Grace's arm, "All you'll have to do is avoid him."

Grace frowned, "I think that's pretty much impossible, trust me, I've tried."

"Like I said," Kitty nodded, "Good luck with that."