A/N: I AM SOOOO SORRY. This took forever and I feel awful. But now it's summer, so on the bright side, I will be able to update faster. Sometimes. I'm going to be gone a lot this summer but I'll try to be faster when I'm actually home. Well almost every review asked for Ned and Ted so here they are! It's not my best chapter, but its not my worst.
Jessi: Oh my Google, you brought a dog.
Ted: Meet Flamsteed.
Jessi: Flamsteed is big.
Ned: Well he's not exactly little.
Jessi: Right. And what does Flamsteed eat?
Ted: Dog food?
Jessi: Okay, more important question, does he eat people?
Ned: Not that we know of.
Ted: Though he was chewing on Alistair's shoe yesterday and we haven't seen him since.
Ned: Ted that was your shoe.
Ted: And you let him eat it!
Ned: It was an ugly shoe. You're better off without it.
Ted: Then where did Alistair go?
Ned: Um… I really don't know.
Jessi: Does the dog eat people or not!
Ted: No.
Jessi: It took you that long to answer?
Ned: We like to talk things out.
Jessi: Oh really? Which one of you is better looking?
Ned and Ted: I am.
Ted: I'm the one with the dog, Ned! Girls like dogs!
Jessi: I beg to differ; I thought your dog ate people.
Ned: Please, like the dog improves your looks!
Ted: Well there's nothing to help yours!
Ned: You're the one who bought those awful shoes!
Ted: Says the one with that bought and actually wears a Hawaiian shirt!
Ned: You read what Dan said in The Maze of Bones! We all dress the same; I'm trying to expand my closet!
Ted: So buy a pair of jeans!
Jessi: He has a point there.
Ned: I'm not the one dumb enough to let Sinead cut my hair!
Ted: You told me it looked fine!
Ned: Sinead couldn't cut her way out of a paper bag!
Ted: Oh yeah? Who cuts your hair?
Ned: The guy that Alistair has come in once a month!
Ted: The one that wears the glasses with a flashlight on the side?
Ned: Yea!
Ted: That's a dog groomer, Ted! He comes in to trim Buffy and Flamsteed and the puppies!
Jessi: There are puppies!
Ned: Four. Buffy's quite a mother. And her fur looks great!
Jessi: The two man eating dogs have puppies? What, do they breathe fire!
Ted: I can't believe you let the dog groomer cut your hair! Though it explains the state it's in.
Ned: At least he knows how to hold a pair of scissors!
Ted: Well my teeth are straight, unlike yours!
Henry: Jessi?
Jessi: Yes, Henry?
Henry: They're identical.
Jessi: I know.
Henry: So maybe you should remind them of that before they tear each other to shreds over who has better nails.
Jessi: its revenge for not answering my man eating dog question right away. In the time they took to answer, Flamsteed could have eaten me and I would be being digested at the moment while they fought over Ted's ugly shoe. Besides, they like to talk things out, remember? I like to think I'm increasing their brotherly bond.
Ned: Heart boxers are way more attractive than smiley faces!
Ted: Smiley faces beat hearts any day!
Jessi: See? Bonding.
Alejandro: Would you two shut up!
*Silence*
Alejandro: Smiley faces? Hearts? What are you, four?
*Ned and Ted look down, blushing*
Ned: Sorry, we were being stupid.
Alejandro: Yea, you were.
Jessi: Wow, Al is actually being mature, Henry.
Henry: Wait for it.
Alejandro: Everybody knows teddy bears kick butt!
*He tries to prove his point*
Jessi: *covering my eyes* Alejandro pull up your pants!
Ned: Hearts are better than teddy bears!
Alejandro: The bears are holding hearts! That's, like, two in one! And they are smiling! I beat both of yours! See Jessi!
Jessi: No, I don't, I'm too busy being scarred for life!
Ted: My smiley faces could take both of yours down!
Ned: No! My hearts are pink!
*Ned and Ted also try to prove their points*
Jessi: No! Don't do what Al does; his mind didn't age past five!
Alejandro: I am a mature adult, Jessi!
Jessi: Then pull up your pants and make them do the same!
Alejandro: Make me!
Jessi: Henry!
Henry: All of you are so wrong right now!
Jessi: Thank you!
Henry: Four leaf clovers beat all of you!
*And Henry tries to prove his point*
Jessi: That's not what I meant for you to do!
Ned: Four leaf clovers can't even stand against hearts!
Ted: Jessi, who wins?
Jessi. I. Am. Not. Taking. My. Hands. Off. Of. My. Eyes.
Henry: Come on, pick one!
Jessi: Not until you pull up your pants!
Alejandro: Fine!
Jessi: Is everyone decent?
Ted: Yes.
Jessi: Okay. Good. Um…
Alejandro: Teddy bears are adorable! It is a scientific fact!
Ned: No, it's not! Pink hearts are epic! Pink is a manly color!
Ted: Smiley faces are just happy. Boxers should make people happy.
Henry: If that's true, then my boxers are lucky.
Jessi: Henry wins!
Ned: Why!
Jessi: He's Irish. It's just fitting for him to wear clovers. Clovers are lucky and so are the Irish. Now can we get back to the interview?
Alejandro: No! My teddy bears deserve justice!
Jessi: Al, you started this. Not get out before I get Flamsteed to eat you.
*Alejandro leaves*
Jessi: Henry, go get some treats for the dog before it gets hungry.
Henry: No problem.
Ted: Flamsteed's eaten.
Jessi: I'm not taking any chances.
Ned: He's not going to eat you.
Jessi: Like I said, I am not taking any chances. Ugh, this whole interview and I only asked you four questions. And three of them were about your dog.
Ted: Well what were you going to ask?
Jessi: I don't know I usually just wing it.
Ned: If it makes you feel any better, Ted's favorite movie is Cinderella.
Ted: Ned!
Ned: Well it is.
Ted: Ned wasn't potty trained until he was seven!
Ned: Ted!
Ted: Well you weren't!
Henry: Hey Jessi, will bacon work?
Jessi: Yea, it's meat. Dog's like meat.
*Flamsteed jumped up and then ripped the bacon out of Henry's hand*
Henry: Hey!
Jessi: You said he'd eaten!
Ted: He has! Ned fed him!
Ned: No, Ted fed him!
Ted: I didn't do it!
Ned: Well neither did I!
Jessi: You let a starving man eating dog into my interview room!
Ned: He's not starving anymore, look at all the bacon he's eating.
A/N: Thanks a bunches to ReadAndWriteButMostlyRead for the great question "Which is better looking?" because I was suffering severe writers block. Once again I'm sorry this took so long. I'm going to try to update next week, and I'm between doing Amy or Jonah, but maybe another Jonah would be... to much Jonah?