I know I've made gratuitous use of my M rating before, but be seriously, seriously warned. This chapter contains horrible, horrible M rated stuff. Seriously, take heed.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the twisted mind inside my head.

Axel walked onto the sandlot early, sitting on the bench and waiting for the rest of the team. He put his headphones in his ear and listened to his CD player. He didn't hear Roxas coming up behind him, and jumped when he was poked in the shoulder. He turned and pulled out the headphones when he noticed the blond.

"What do you want?"

"Uh... So, what's up?"

"Cut the shit, Roxas." Said boy flinched at the verbal lashing. "You haven't spoken to me in weeks. What the hell do you want?"

Roxas looked down and shuffled his feet awkwardly. "I just... I'm really sorry. If you'd give me a chance to explain..."

Axel crossed his arms. "I'm waiting."

"Not here. Could you meet me tomorrow? At the clearing?"

He rolled his eyes. "I don't know. I'm gonna be with Namine tomorrow."

"Well, whenever you're done. I'll be there all night."

"Alright, Roxas." The blond turned to walk away. "You're not staying for practice?"

Roxas looked back over his shoulder. "Not today. Tell coach I'm sick or something."

And with that, he left, not noticing the eavesdropper hidden in the shadows.

Axel was laying across his couch, and Namine was above him. Their mouths were attached, hands roving everywhere, as they had been for the better part of an hour. Namine had removed both their shirts a while ago, and Axel was fumbling with her bra. He achieved his goal and flung it across the room. He sat up and pushed her onto her back, crawling over her and taking control. He started kissing his way down her body. She lay there shivering and pulled him back up to kiss her.

"Axel, I'm ready."

He froze and stared into her eyes.

"Nami... Are you sure?"

She nodded, smiling at him. He kissed her excitedly and picked her up, carrying her to his bedroom. He burst through the door and shut it behind him, then walked to the bed. He laid her gently on the bed and took down his jeans. He watched as her eyes widened and her mouth made an O as she saw the size of his manhood. He smirked and approached her, sliding her skirt and her panties down her legs and throwing them somewhere. He crawled over her and kissed her, relishing the feel of flesh against flesh. Reaching over to the bedside table, he pulled open the drawer and fumbled until he found a condom. He slipped it over himself and then ran his hands down her sides, never taking his mouth away from hers. He spread her legs and positioned himself at her entrance.

"Are you sure?"

"Will it hurt?"

Axel brushed a hair out of her face. "Only a little."

She nodded, smiling. "I'm ready."

He entered her slowly, feeling that she had stopped breathing. He looked into her eyes the entire time and froze as she cried out.

"No, no I'm fine. Keep going, Axel."

He took her word and kept pushing until he was buried in her completely. He pulled out and repeated it over and over, going as slowly as he could bear to go until he couldn't take it anymore.

He looked into her eyes pleasingly, and she understood immediately. "Faster, Axel."

He immediately changed pace, thrusting into her hard until he came. He pulled out of her and took off the condom, throwing it in the wastebasket beside his bed. He lay down with his stomach against her back. He kissed her on the back of her neck and lay there as she drifted off to sleep.

He held her, smiling, and happen to look up at the clock.

"Holy shit," he whispered. It was after 11.

He slid his arm out from under Namine and crept over to his closet to get some new clothes. He ran to the shower and threw the clothes on, making it out the door in a record 8 minutes. He drove out to the woods and jogged up to the clearing. He saw Roxas sitting against a tree, huddled into himself with his arms around his knees. He was wearing Axel's hoodie.

"Roxas?"

The boy looked shocked that he showed up. "You came..." He stood and walked closer, but still leaving a noticeable distance between them.

"What did you need to tell me?"

"I'm really sorry." Axel moved closer to hear the blond's low mumbling. "There's been a lot of things going on in my life... and I've been confused about a lot."

He stepped a bit closer, so that he could touch him if he chose to. "I don't like not having you to talk to because... well because..."

Axel stepped closer. "Because what?"

Roxas stretched up and captured Axel's lips with his own. Axel's lips molded to the blond's immediately before he froze and pushed him away.

"What the hell Roxas?" He wiped his arm across his mouth. "I'm with Namine!"

"But I really like you Axel!" He grabbed at his hand but it was yanked back immediately. "Why don't you want me? I'm your best friend!" Tears began streaming down Roxas' face.

"You know how I feel about Namine! A friend wouldn't try to take that away from me!"

Roxas fell to his knees and buried his face in his hands, sobbing.

Axel stood there, moving his arms awkwardly. "Look, Roxas. I'm with Namine, okay? I really like her, we've got something good going there."

Roxas looked up and sniffed. "You're her dirty secret."

"Regardless. I'm with her. If circumstances were different... I don't know. But you can't ask this of me."

They stood there in silence, neither knowing what else could be said.

"Did you ride your bike here?"

He shook his head. "Walked."

"Do you want a ride?"

He shook his head again. "No, Axel. I'll be fine. Just go."

"Are you su-"

"Just go!" His voice cracked as he shouted through his tears. Roxas watched as the redhead disappeared into the trees. 'If circumstances were different…' He sobbed anew and barely heard the convertible drive off. He sat there for a few minutes before getting up and taking off in the opposite direction. He walked through the trees, climbing over stumps and logs.

"Roxas!"

He lit up. His luck was finally changing; Axel had come back for him!

He turned around with a grin on his face and stared straight into teal eyes. He yelped and began running, stumbling over roots and losing his way in the trees. A large rock was thrown from behind and hit him in the back of his head. He fell.

Axel's head was spinning. Roxas had kissed him. He could wrap his head around that much.

But everything else...

There were so many implications behind that kiss. So much hanging on that brief touching of lips. And Axel had said 'if circumstances were different'... surely Roxas couldn't expect Axel to just leave Namine like that. But what if he did? What if he broke things off with Namine? Would he just move forward with the blond? Could he?

How long had Roxas felt that way about him? How long had Roxas yearned for something more than the friendship Axel was offering? And how hadn't he noticed?

Although, if Axel was honest with himself, he'd known all along. He saw the way Roxas looked at him; it wasn't too hard to figure out.

"Hey, Axel?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you think we'd be such good friends when we met?"

"... I don't know."

"What did you think of me?"

"I thought you were… interesting."

"Oh... I thought you were beautiful."

Beautiful. Axel cursed himself for not picking up on the blond's feelings that summer night so long ago. How could he have been so stupid? It's no wonder the blond had been so cold with him recently, he'd practically been rubbing his relationship with Namine in Roxas' face. He should have diffused the situation earlier, done something to prevent this situation. But what could he have done?

If he thought about it hard enough, Axel could feel the stirrings of a few displaced feelings for the blond, but nothing he considered strong enough to act upon. He was suddenly stricken with guilt. To act upon. Actually contemplating the notion of acting upon feelings for someone else when Namine was so important to him.

But he had been meaning to talk with Namine, straighten a few things out. Roxas was right; Axel was her dirty little secret, and he'd been meaning to remedy that.

Axel stripped down to his boxers and tried, unsuccessfully, to slide back in the bed without waking Namine. She was roused quickly and snaked her arms around his torso just as fast. "Where'd you go? The door woke me..."

"I went out to the woods, to talk to Roxas." He mentally berated himself for saying that. At this time of night, his actions would seem weird, and with all the thoughts running through his head, he couldn't trust himself not to say something.

"Roxas? At one in the morning?"

Axel swore to himself as he realized just how long he'd been out. "Yeah, he has some, uh, stuff going on. Guy stuff," he said, halting her before she could ask about the 'stuff' he was desperately trying to avoid. "You know I'm his best friend."

Namine shrugged and yawned before curling up into Axel's side. "Yeah. I haven't seen him around lately, it's weird."

Axel really didn't want to be having this conversation right now. "I guess he wants to give us space. And he's on the struggle team now, it takes up some time." Axel forced a yawn in the hopes that she would drop the topic until morning, or else forget it completely.

"I guess. I miss seeing him around I guess. You know," she began, tracing a hand up Axel's side absently, "I'm surprised Riku let him on the team. My brother hate Roxas. He's been after him for years..." Namine's hand stilled and Axel felt her breath stop for a second before she shook her head, dismissing whatever idea had been floating around in there. "No, that's ridiculous." She mumbled to herself.

Axel angled his head so he could take a better look at her face lying on his chest - she looked confused and more than a little troubled. "What?"

She furrowed her eyebrows. "Nothing, I just thought - nothing. I'm really... tired."

Axel sighed and ran his fingers through Namine's hair and listened as her breath evened out. He let his thoughts turn back to Roxas' confessions, and his own confusion about it all.

He only wished struggling with his feelings was as simple as struggling an opponent.

Roxas came to with hands around his neck. His head snapped to the left as he was backhanded.

"What did I tell you?"

There under the trees, not even the faint glow of the stars reached them. Riku pounced on him, furiously ripping at his clothes, practically foaming at the mouth. In a matter of moments he had Roxas turned on his stomach, bare ass up, and was pulling his own pants down around his hips. Roxas struggled, trying in vain to scramble away, but in one swift, painful movement Riku entered into his completely unlubricated opening and pounded repeatedly, roughly, mercilessly. He raked his nails down the blond's back, nails drawing blood in their wake. Roxas screamed as Riku continued the torture, dragging his nails through the wounds, the combined pain of this and the raw intrusion becoming unbearable.

"Riku! Stop! Please!"

Riku slowed and completely pulled out of the blond, who sighed in relief, but the reprieve didn't last for long. Riku flipped Roxas over and punched him in the face. Roxas cried out as his nose made a sickening /crunch/, then again when the fist came down once more. Riku rose and stood over him.

"You! Belong! To me!" Each word was accentuated with a stomp to Roxas' torso. He gasped as the wind was completely knocked out of him and turned to the side to spit out some blood. He heard the leaves crunch under Riku's receding feet and attempted to get away. Upon standing, however, he realized that he couldn't see straight and had no sense of balance. He grabbed his pants, leaned on the tree nearest to him and slowly walked from tree to tree, looking for some way out. He reached a big oak that he recognized from the way in and walked around it.

"Where the fuck do you think you're going?" Roxas broke into a run but only made it a few yards before collapsing. He laid there with his face in the ground, sobbing as he heard Riku approaching and knew he could do nothing to save himself. He was flipped over to stare into angry eyes. Riku smiled wickedly and held a stick over his face. "I brought you a present, bitch. But you can't have it yet, I'm not done with you."

Flipping Roxas over, he rammed into him. Every pleasured groan was drowned out by a pained scream. Riku wrapped his hand around the blond's neck and squeezed, applying more pressure with each thrust until he came inside him. Roxas expected that Riku would leave him there, in the middle of nowhere, but screamed louder than ever in newly agonizing pain as something larger and rougher than Riku's cock literally ripped into him. Riku laughed as he moved the branch faster, enjoying the sounds of the blond's crying and screaming. Eventually, Roxas went numb, unable to feel anything at all. With him no longer screaming, Riku lost interest in the action and ceased.

"Get up," he commanded.

Roxas slowly rose to his feet, focusing all of his energy on keeping himself upright and ignoring the pain in his backside.

Riku approached him, standing directly in front of him. "If I ever catch you talking to him again, your punishment will be much worse. You won't be able to stand for days. Stop fucking with me." He leaned in and sucked and bit at a spot on Roxas' neck before looking at him in disgust. "You're mine."

I'm sorry that you read that. I'm sorry for writing that.

Ugh, proofreading that was a pain, I just get an overwhelming feeling of ICK with a side of ohgodkillmenow every time I read over this.

Review, tell me how horrid my mind is.