"Holy shit! Vic, she's smiling at me!"

It was the last week of May. Jackie was nearly two months old. At the moment, Colin and I were currently sitting on the couch in my living room. For the past week, he had been at my house in nearly every moment of his spare time. He'd even taken to spending the nights on the couch, so that he was available to check on Jackie at night. This was because N.E.W.T.s were coming up. In a week I would be heading off to Hogwarts to take my exams and, to put it mildly, I was freaking out. Luckily, with Colin's help, I was able to pretty much study non-stop.

I peeled my eyes away from the Potions text book that I'd been staring at for hours. "What?"

"Jackie just smiled at me. I knew she liked me more than you!"

"She smiled?" I asked, setting my book aside and grabbing her. "Come on, sweetie," I cooed, "smile for mummy."

She just stared up at me, eyes wide and face blank.

"Come on," I said, "give mummy a big smile, like the one you gave daddy. But bigger."

Still nothing.

"She likes me more. This proves it," said Colin, smirking.

"She does not like you more, Colin," I snapped. "I'm her mother. I carried her inside me for nine months. I gave birth to her. I nurse her. She likes me more!"

"Then why did she smile at me first?"

"Shut up."

The day I left was extremely difficult for me. The longest I'd ever been away from Jackie was the one day that Colin and I went to Diagon Alley. Now I was to be gone for an entire week.

"I can't do this!" I wailed, standing in front of the fireplace that I was supposed to be stepping into to take me to Hogwarts.

"Darling, you 'ave to," said my mum, her voice soothing. She waved Jackie's arm back and forth at me. "Say bye to your mummy, Jackie."

"Bye, Jackie," I said, my voice cracking slightly. "Mummy will miss you. Mummy loves you."

She smiled at me.

And I bet it was a lot bigger than the smile she gave Colin.

When I arrived at Hogwarts, I immediately was headed to the Gryffindor common room, where Grace and Rox practically assaulted me as soon as came through the portrait hole.

Grace was particularly excited, since the last time she had seen me was when I left school.

"Tell me all about the baby!" she demanded.

For the next few hours, we sat around the common room talking about Jackie. I showed them photos that I'd taken of her.

"She's gorgeous, Vic," Said Grace. "And she's like a perfect mixture of you and Colin. I can't decide who she looks more like."

I laughed. "Well, Colin's mum is convinced she looks more like him. And my mum is convinced she looks more like me. And everyone else is undecided like you."

The conversation slowly drifted away from Jackie and towards boys. Grace filled me in on the latest with her and Aidan. Rox told me about a boy named Jack that she'd been on a few dates with. And I told them about my continued confusion regarding Teddy and Colin.

"The night before I went into labor, Teddy and I kissed," I told them.

Their eyes widened.

"Then he spent the night. In my bed. Clothes on and everything. We were just sleeping. But he told me that he'd always take me back if I ever wanted him to."

Rox let out a loud squeal.

"Hey, Rox, shut up!" shouted Aidan from across the common room. "Some of us are actually trying to study."

Rox responded with a rude hand gesture.

Grace rolled her eyes, but she was smiling. "Please continue, Vic."

"Well, things have been kind of awkward between us since then. I've been busy with the baby, so I don't get to see him much and when I do all we ever do is make meaningless small talk. Neither of us has mentioned the kiss yet."

"And where does Colin figure into all this?" asked Rox.

"Well, things with Colin are pretty much the exact opposite as they are with Teddy. I see him all the time and things couldn't be less awkward. I feel so comfortable around him."

''Interesting," murmured Rox.

"I think Colin and I are another reason things have been awkward between Teddy and I," I continued. "Teddy saw us, er... getting along pretty well at the Burrow on Easter and he didn't look to happy about it."

"Getting along pretty well?" asked Grace.

"Yeah, what the hell does that mean? I was at the Burrow and I don't remember this," added Rox. "Were you like making out or what?"

"No, nothing like that. We haven't snogged or anything yet. We were just messing around. He was tickling me and I was giggling… a lot."

"So you were flirting?" asked Rox.

"Maybe a little," I admitted.

"And Teddy saw?"

I nodded.

"Poor Teddy," murmured Grace.

I sighed. "Let's talk about something else. I want to hear more about this Jack bloke."

Rox grinned. "Well, he's in Hufflepuff. He's a sixth year like me. He's really nice; I think you'd like him…"

I leaned back in my seat, listening to Rox. It felt good to have girl friends to talk to again. I'd missed this. At that moment I felt content. Yes, I knew that in the morning I would have to wake up and start taking my exams. I knew that I should probably be doing some last minute studying. But, for the first time in months I felt relaxed. And I was going to enjoy it while I could.

My exams went better than I expected they would. During my Potions practical exam I was asked to brew a potion that Teddy had helped me with just a few days before Jackie was born. And it turned out exactly as it was supposed to. Even the examiner looked impressed.

All in all, when I stepped through the fire on Saturday morning to go home, I was feeling pretty sure that I had achieved a passing grade in every subject.

I stepped out of the fireplace into my kitchen. My mum greeted me warmly.

"Where's Jackie?" I asked her, after filling her in on all of my exams.

"At Colin's 'ouse," she replied. "She's been spending a lot of time zere with 'im. I 'ope zat's okay."

"Yeah, that's fine," I said. "I'll just head over there if that's okay with you. I'll be home for dinner."

She nodded absentmindedly. "Alright, darling."

"Vic!" said Colin, opening the door upon my arrival. "Hey, I didn't think you'd be back until this afternoon."

"I was anxious to see Jackie,'" I said, stepping inside.

"And me, right?"

I grinned. "Yeah, sure."

We headed up to his room.

"My mum dragged out my old crib from storage," said Colin, gesturing towards the crib set up in the corner, where Jackie was currently lying.

I walked over to it and lifted her out. "Hey, Jackie," I said, smiling widely. "Were you good while I was gone? Did you behave for daddy?"

"How were your exams?" asked Colin.

"They went really well, actually."

"I knew they would."

Jackie had fallen asleep in my arms. Why she couldn't do that during the night was a mystery to me. It would sure help me out a lot. I gently placed her back in the crib and went to sit down on Colin's bed.

"It's been a while since I was in your bedroom," I said, looking around. "It hasn't changed much."

Colin sat down next to me. "It's been eleven months since you told me you were pregnant. Almost a year."

"It's been eleven months since I was in here? That's crazy."

"Yeah."

I suddenly felt very awkward when it occurred to me what we had been doing in there at that time. On the very bed I was sitting on.

"Er, so… How's school going for you?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"It's going pretty good. I'm graduating this month."

"Do you know what you're doing afterwards?"

"I'll start working at the store full-time," he replied. "Mr. Perkins, the owner, told me that I can start living in the room above it too, if I'd like. I think I will. It'll be nice to have my own place. Mum will try to make me feel guilty about it, but it's not like I'll be far away."

I nodded. "Sounds like you have things pretty well figured out. I wish I did."

"I'll be able to help support you and the baby more with the bigger paycheck I'll be getting."

I nodded again, as I lay back on his bed. "I'm so exhausted. I don't even remember what it feels like to get a good night's sleep anymore."

I adjusted his pillow and closed my eyes. I'd forgotten how comfortable his bed was.

"Vic?" asked Colin after a few minutes of silence.

"Mmm?"

"What would you do if I kissed you right now?"

I immediately sat up. "What?"

"Would you kiss me back? Or would you knee me in the groin or something?

For a minute I was tempted to say the latter, but then I realized I wasn't sure.

"Why don't you kiss me and find out?" I whispered.

"What if you hurt me?"

"I guess you just have to decide if I'm worth the risk," I replied.

He leaned in slightly, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Well?" I asked quietly. "Am I?"

"Yes, definitely," he said, before closing the distance between us.

For a second after his lips met mine, an image of Teddy flashed into my mind, accompanied by a slight feeling of guilt. But I quickly pushed them both aside and threw myself into Colin's kiss.

He tasted so familiar. It was almost as if I'd never stopped kissing him. He gently leaned me back until I was laying down, his body pinning me to his bed. As the snogging heated up, a voice in the back of my head was screaming at me to slow things down, but I ignored it. At some point, I allowed him to flip us over, so that I was straddling him. His hands were everywhere. My legs. My hair. Under my shirt. Somewhere along the line, articles of clothing began disappearing as well.

Eventually, I pulled back, panting heavily. Somehow, without me completely realizing it, we'd ended up in only our underwear.

"We need to stop," I murmured, my finger tracing over the song lyrics tattooed on his arm.

"Why?" he asked, pulling me closer and kissing my neck.

"Because we can't have sex."

"Why not?"

I pulled away from again. "We just can't."

"What the hell's stopping us?" he asked. "We're adults. We have a kid. If we want to shag, then we can."

That voice in my head was back, begging for me to say no. But the look that Colin was giving me was overpowering the voice. I'd always had trouble saying no to him.

"Come on, babe," he whispered.

Babe. He hadn't called me that since we had broken up all those months ago. Back when Jackie was just a tiny little speck inside me. Merlin, it felt good to hear him call me that again. Really good. The voice in my head had gone silent. All I could hear was our breathing.

"Okay," I mumbled, leaning in to kiss him again.

Please don't kill me.