A/N: Hey guys! I, um... Have an announcement.
[Said Anouncement: Our dear author and her cronies' obsession has switched from Death Note... to Hetalia. Also, I've pretty much run out of ideas... So this may or may not be the last chapter of Death Note School CRACK... But don't worry too much, young ponhappitons! I will continue the series... As a Hetalia ff. I'm not sure how much more I can do with these characters while making it relevant to, well, the characters. It's become more like just me & my friends having weird inside jokes with the DN guys there watching. =/ I will also be changing the name to School Crack: Death Note. I might pick this back up, but for now (err... whenever I get around to it,) School Crack: Hetalia will be my plot-less school crackfic. x3
HOWEVER, THIS CHAPPIE SHALL BE LONG. -ISH.]
I'd like to thank all my reviewers for being totally epics awesums peoplez;
I am L with a death note, Eru no Tsubasa, Sho-Kun1301, eternalsnowfox, lightning027, Do You Like My Sexy Hair, Exploading albino potato, and SophieSynthetic !
Seriously, guys, ICH LIEBE DICH.
And of course, I'd like to thank Jacqueline ((who was, but is no longer) jakethedog), Hannah (BeyondEvolandGrace), Tori (fanggirl01), Tawny (TawnyShine), Olivia (shesshygirl11), Ashley (QueenofAshes), and all the random people without ff accounts (that I know of...) for being awesome enough to let me be your puppeteer... Not like they actually got a choice in it anyway }]
SO MANY RANDOM REFERENCES THIS CHAPTER. XDX
Jacqueline: It's just such a vulnerable feeling; lying on the ground, half naked...
Ariel: Well, I think that that's probably the weirdest intro we've ever had.
Hannah: I concur :I
Tori: O.o
Olivia: ...wtf class is this? ! We don't all have a single class all together, WTF?
-You're outside walking, dumbass X.x Seriously... are you all blind? !-
*parking lot set appears with about a hundred kids walking in a circle with a few adults not watching*
Mallory: I feel the sudden urge to punch the air to my right.
-... Yeah, well, your faise.-
Lily (will now be called... um... Bruder-Shwester-Thingy from now on, because of the two 'Lily's...) : Woah, why am I here? I'm in 7th grade, I shouldn't be outside right no-
Jacqueline: I THINK SOMEONE PUT POT IN MY WATER! LET'S SING DISNEY SONGS!
Ariel, Hannah, Mallory, Sophia: YEAH! :D
Marie, Lily, Bruder-Shwester-Thingy, Olivia, Ashley, Tori: O.o *facepalm*
Jacqueline, Ariel, Hannah, Mallory, Sophia, Matt, Ryuk: LET'S. GET DOWN. TO BUSINESS! -TO DEFEAT, THE HUNS! DID. THEY SEND ME. DAUGHTERS, WHEN I ASKED, FOR SONS? YOU'RE THE SAAADEST BUNCH I'VE EVER MET, BUT YOU CAN BET, BEFORE WE'RE THROOOOOOOUUUGHHHH... IIIIIIIIIIII'LLLLLLLLLLLL, MAKE A MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNN, OUT OF YOUUUUUUUUUUU!
L: ...What exactly is the point of this?
Jacqueline, Ariel, Hannah, Mallory, Sophia, Matt, Ryuk: I've heard, there was, a secret chord~ That David played, and it pleased the Lord~ But you don't really care for music, do ya? It goes like this; The fourth, the fifth! The minor fall; the major lift! The baffled king, composing, Hallelujah~ Hallelujah... Hallelujah... Hallelujah... Hallelu~ooo~ooo~oooyah...
Mello: ...You guys realize that Shrek was a Dreamworks movie, right?
Ariel: Mello! You had a childhood? !
Mello: ...
Jacqueline, Ariel, Hannah, Mallory, Sophia, Matt, Ryuk: WELL YOU THINK THAT YOU CAN TAKE ME ON? YOU MUST BE CRAZEH! 'CAUSE AIN'T A SINGLE THING YOU'VE DONE, IS GONNA PHASE MEH! OH, BUT IF YOU WANT TO HAVE A GO, I JUST WANNA LET YOU KNOOOOOOOWWWWW... GET OFF OF MAH BAHCK, AND INTO MY GAME! GET OUTTA MAH WAY AND OUTTA MAH BRAIN! GET OUTTA MAH FAISE, OR GIVE IT YOUR BEST SHOT! I THINK IT'S TIME, YOU BETTER FACE THE FACT... GET OFF O' MAH BACK!
Mello: AGAIN, A DREAMWORKS MOVIE!
Ariel, Mallory, Hannah, Ryuk: DON'T LET THEM GET AWAY, DON'T LET THEM GET AWAY, THEY'RE WORTH A LOT OF MONEY, DON'T LET THEM GET AWAY!
Jacqueline, Sophia, Matt: WE'VE GOTTA GET AWAY, WE'VE GOTTA GET AWAY! WE WON'T LIKE IT IN THE ZOO, WE'VE GOTTA GET AWAY! WE'VE GOTTA RUN AND HIDE! WE'VE GOTTA RUN AND HIDE! IF THEY TAKE US TO THE ZOO, THEY'LL LOCK US UP INSIDE! WE'VE GOTTA GET AWAY, WE'VE GOTTA GET AWAY, DON'T LIKE IT IN THE ZOO, WE'VE GOTTA GET AWAY! WE'VE GOT TO STAY AHEAD, WE'VE GOTTA STAY AHEAD, IF THEY TAKE US TO THE ZOO WE'LL WISH WE WERE DEAD!
Mello: ...You've got to be kidding me. T.T LIFE WORK CORPORATION! NOT DISNEY!
Jacqueline, Ariel, Hannah, Mallory, Sophia, Matt, Ryuk: WE COULDA HAD IT AAAAAAAAAAAAAA~ALL, ROLLIN' IN THE DEEEEEEEEEEEEE~EEP! YOU HAD MAH HEART INSIDE, YO HA-AHND! AND YOU PLAYED ET, YOU PLAYED ET, YOU PLAYED ET... to the beat~
Mello: ...THAT'S NOT EVEN-
Jacqueline, Ariel, Hannah, Mallory, Sophia, Matt, Ryuk: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ARE YOU? WHO, WHO? WHO, WHO? WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ARE YOU? WHO, WHO? WHO, WHO? WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ARE YOU? WHO, WHO? WHO, WHO? I REALLY WANNA KNOW~ WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ARE YOU? WHO, WHO? WHO, WHO? COME ON TELL ME, WHO ARE YOU? YOU? YOU? Ohhh, you~?...
Mello: T.T *grabs Matt by his fluffehvestthingwtf* Matt, we're leaving.
Matt: What do you think of CSI?
Everyone but Mello and Matt: 'I like CSI' 'CSI is good' 'Well I love CSI' 'Sometimes I jack off to- ...nevermind.' 'I enjoy watching CSI.'
Mello: T.T
Matt: -MIAMI!
Everyone but Mello and Matt: . . . *shoots themselves*
Mello: ... *starts dragging Matt*
Matt: *grabs Mello's hair and yanks, looking at him with wide, accusing eyes* HOW COULD YOU? ! ALL THEY WANTED WAS TO SING AND LOVE YOU! AND YOU KILLED THEM!
-Meanwhile~-
Mikami, The Task Force, The SPK, Watari, Roger, Near, Takada, Misa: *stuck in Madagascar. In a blizzard. What the fuck.*
Aizawa: ...Well this sucks.
Mikami, Task Force, Watari, Roger, Near, Takada, Misa: It's your purpose in life to leave us out of this, isn't it, Miss Author?
The SPK: *walk in behind them* ...We've been left out for four chapters. And we had one line in the last chapter. At the very end. And an action/setting at the beginning of this one. You have. No right. To complain.
Gevanni: *glaring at Near*
Jacqueline: Ohhhhhh Gevanniiiiii Don't be maaad! Just because you were practically Near's pageboy, and the Matsuda of the SPK (though it wasn't your fault...), and treated like the idiot your not, and never given a chance to do anything... doesn't mean you get to be mean! :D
Gevanni: . . . I hate you.
Jacqueline: D:
-Wait, when/how did she even GET here? !-
Ariel: Eh... I think this is the afterlife or something.
-...What the... That's... I don't even...-
Marie: Yeah, pretty much.
-...-
Marie: My life. In a nutshell.
Hannah: Your fault for not being an anime fan xP
Ariel: RANDOM M-PREG!
All guys present: *babies randomly shoot from the guys onto the ground, most of them breaking their necks upon impact*
EVERYONE but Ariel: ...the actual fucking fuck? !
Ariel: I BLAME STEPHANO & WHEATLEY! I NEVER TRUSTED EITHER OF THEM! Stephano looks all innocent, and gold, and statue-ish... And Wheatley is so moronic... JUST FURTHER PROOF!
-...IDEK... Again, you all never cease to... horrify me.-
Mallory: That's our job C:
Marie: *punches some random dude*
Ben: GAH! DUDE, WHAT THE HELL? I'M A CRIPPLE D:
Ariel: You've had that thing on your foot forever! You're not a cripple! Suck it the fuck up! D:{ *rakes 'claws' down Mallory's random sunburn, which is reallySUPERbad and so red it's almost brown*
Mallory: *responds by punching Ariel in the face*
Ariel: THIS IS MY LIEFFFFFFFFFFF D:{
Ben: ;A; Okay, okay... I just wanted an appearance, man...
Ariel: GTFO.
Ben: But-
Ariel: I said, I've got an idea; Why don't you little 'crippled' weirdo get on a leaky, rickety little riverraft and GET THE FUCK OFF THE ISLAND, huh! ? D:{
Ben: ... D:
Ariel: Sail around the world until you hit Antartica. When you get there, commit genocide on any native indigenous penguins; have a groovy time. Knock yourself out. Have an ice trial! Let us know how that works out for ya. We'll be back here having a pahtay, if anyone needs us.
Ben: . . . D:
L: ...Wasn't that senselessly- and randomly- cruel? And... just generally random?
Ariel: DO YOU WANT TO SUFFER THE SAME FAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE?
L: .-. No... But I really don't...
Ariel (along with a bunch of creepy back-up people/voices... O.o) : SUFFERRRRRRRRRR...
L: I'M GOOD...
Ariel (same) : FAAAAAAATE...
-Okay, I am THROUGH WITH THIS. It's even worse here than at your school! I AM GOING BACK! *poof*-
Everyone: *poofed back to the school as well*
-...Are you kidding me? !-
Tawny: *being chased by the Buckner [Pedo!] Bear* AHHHHHHHHHH D: DON'T LOOK BACK DON'T LOOK BACK DON'T LOOK BACK DON'T LOOK BA- JESUS PENIS, WHY DID YOU LOOK BACK WHY DID YOU LOOK BACK WH- Oh hey Mr. Shair :3 *hides behind random chair, sees Jax's 'discarded' water bottle* Somebody's been drinking :I This is just like my hou- I mean what? No, bad Tawny. No drinking jokes. X3 At least there's not period everywhe-... HAHA! *picks up bottle and throws it at the Buckner Bear* :D . . . OHWAITNO WHY DID I DO THAT NOW HE'LL SEE ME! MR. SHAIR HIIIIIIIIDE MEEEEEEEEE-HEEEEEE... *picks up chair & holds it over her head*
Death Note crew: ...Dafuq?
Buckner [Pedo] Bear: *Runs around, taking out his confusion about his deep homosexual feelings out on random objects*
Tawny: You mad brah? You can't do SHIT brah, you can't do SHIT!
Buckner [Pedo] Bear: *going back to the elementary school, when suddenly he turns around super fast* IT'S RAPING TIME. *starts licking lips & getting all creepy... & turning blue/purple.*
Tawny: AHHHHHH BITCH YOU SO UGLYYYYYYYY!
Hannah: TAWNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! :D
Buckner [Pedo] Bear: *poofs*
Tawny: Goddammit, I SOOO knew that was gonna be a poofer... Yeah...
Bruder-Shwester-Thingy: Who're you?
Tawny: I'm (Canada!) a Tawny... And I'm gonna stay here FOREVAR...
Jacqueline: RANDOM WTF CHEESE PUFFS!
EVERYONE: *crowds around*
Mysterious squeaking: *Mysterious squeak*
Misa: EEEEEEEK! OMG A RAT!
Tawny: *bends down to pick up little white mouse with red eyes* CRUMPET! :D There you are!
Crumpet: (voice is obviously Tawny's...) Oh herro Tawny! Gawsh you are just so cool and I'll stick with you forever! We'll have amazing adventures, and you'll protect me from zombies with your coolness!
Tawny: Oh, Crumpet, you flatter me! (:
Light, L, Mello, Matt, Near: T.T
Tawny: I AM A VENTRILOQUI- . . . BARRELS.
Ariel and Tawny: *pull out random guns and begin shooting random barrels... THAT ARE FULL OF ALCOHOL! }:D*
Mello, Matt, Misa, Ariel, Tawny, Mallory, Marie, Bruder-Shwester, Matsuda, a bunch o' random teachers: WE HAVE RANDOM DRINKING PROBLEMS BEGINNING NOW! }:D AND MOST OF US ARE UNDERAGE! C:{
SPK, L, Soichiro, Aizawa, Mogi: *DISAPPROVAL*
Jacqueline: I'll be the designated driver! :D
Marie: STFU! EVERYONE KNOWS YOU CAN'T DRIVE FOR SHIT!
Jacqueline: ...This is true. HANNAH IS DESIGNATED DRIVER!
Hannah: B-b-but... Vodka...
Ariel: THIS. IS. PASTAAAAA!
Mello: *shoots more people* *blows more shit up*
-*This is the LAST CHAPTER, and the author can't be more creative with this.*-
-*It's just sad.*-
-*...*-
-*Completely inexcusable.*-
-*...*-
-*...Everyone's dead.*-
-later-
-*Everyone's not dead? (surprise!)*-
-...Still in the school yard...-
Mello: *drunk as fuck* Hay loooooooouk, a pwETTy!...
Everyone: *looks up*
*A giant meteor is coming towards the school*
Everyone: OOOOOOOOO~
*Crash.*
*Burn.*
*Die.*
ENDE.
A/N: "The end of a journey is always depressing. It was a long trip, but now that it's over, it seemed like a blink of an eye. Anyway, it's been fun; if it's meant to be, I hope we meet again."