Hey Lady

She screams for more
More than just some blue eyed metaphor…
And the trouble is, the trouble is, she's always searching
The hour's late, don't wanna hear that it's all gonna end soon
No I'm not crazy I'm in control, and all of my friends still know

Hey lady, don't give up on me
Don't burn your heart out love
Till we're ash overseas…
Hey lady, said I don't wanna fight
Like pretty girls need cowboys
I need you here tonight

I'm on one knee, lover please
How can I put it more simply?
And I wait, for your invitation
And I'm so so so, so over waiting
I'm on one knee, lover please
How can I put it more simply?

Piper sat in a black dress Angela picked out for her with itchy black panty hose on, everyone was in black. She sat in a pew in between Angela, whose hand was clasping Piper's, and her daddy. Piper looked around her quietly, every now and then she looked up to her mom's face and then to her dad a bit unsure. She didn't like it when her mommy cried, lots of people were crying. Her mommy said it was Auntie Han's funeral.

Booth was talking to people that were coming into the church smiling and nodding. Ashley was in his arms. He greeted family, friends, relatives, and anyone who came to pay their respects. Many people spoke to Ashley who only dug her head further into Booth's shoulder shying away from the lot of strangers. Booth looked up through the sea of black dresses and suits and sighed, he smiled shyly as he locked eyes with Bones. A silent conversation ensued and then another man came up to Booth and shook his hand "I'm so sorry for your loss." Said the elderly man, Booth had no idea who he was.

"Daddy?" Piper whispered. Her dad looked like a safer bet to talk to because he wasn't crying. Hodgins looked down to his daughter.

"What is it Munk?"

"When are we gonna go?"

"Shhh…you have to be quiet. In a little while, right now you need to be quiet and wait until Uncle Booth comes in the church with Ashley and Auntie Bren. When they leave we can. Now remember to be quiet." Hodgins explained in a whisper.

"Okay." Piper seemed to accept this answer.

Soon Ashley was in the front pew in Booth's arms her head buried in his shoulder; her daddy was trying not to cry she could tell. As everyone stood to sing a hymn Booth searched for Brennan's hand and squeezed then released. Brennan only continued to sing as her heart opened up a little more to allow Booth better access inside.

Ashley didn't know why her daddy was sad. Auntie Bwen said her mommy was an angel wif her mommy. So, her daddy shouldn't cry. Ash knew to be quiet in church and when everyone filtered out of the big church into a big long black car she stayed quiet in her dad's arms. Everyone was quiet.

In the limo Brennan sat next to Booth she snaked her hand into his and squeezed it, to her surprise he inhaled and squeezed back, not releasing. It was a nice sermon, they had sung a few hymns, what family Hannah had, had come and her friends from work. It was nice, everyone from the team was there and now as they were about to lower the casket. Booth realized that the people that were closest to Hannah were the people closest to Bones. She had not only given him away, but offered her friends up as well.

Ashley looked up to Booth, "What's in der?" she said looking at the fancy white and gold casket that was being lowered into the ground. Angela closed her eyes and when no one answered Ash, she simply grew quiet.

Everyone went out to the Royal Diner that evening for dinner and drinks. Piper and Ash were tired and pestered Bren and Ange most of the evening that they wanted to go home. Brennan glanced at Booth a silent, let's go home Booth. He understood her unspoken words and everyone wrapped it up. The girls were tired, and so eventually their wishes came true.

Ashley was in bed curled up, her woof-woof tucked caringly under her arm. "Daddy?"

"What is it baby?" Booth brushed her tender locks out of her sleepy eyes.

"Is we gonna live with Auntie Bwen now?" Ash asked through a yawn. She asked as if she were asking about the weather.

For a millisecond Booth stopped caressing Ash's hair, hesitating. It must have been a millisecond too long for Ash called his name again as she tried to sit up, "Daddy?"

"Uh…Oh, no. No, we are just staying with Bones so she can doctor your bandages princess." Booth reassured Ashley.

"Then we's goin' home?" Ashley asked as she pet woof-woof as if he were real.

"Yeah, yes…then we will." Booth said and Brennan who was standing outside Ashley's open door nodded a yes to herself in silent understanding. Now what? She promised Hannah she wouldn't leave them. No one told her what to do if they left willingly. She understood they still needed each other, why couldn't he?

"Oh. Okay." Ash said as she drifted off, Booth stood and turned her bedside lamp off then turned to walk out of her room. As he did his eyes met Bones, and in that moment he knew she had heard. She quickly walked away and he sighed taking two giant steps after her and grabbing her wrist. She went to yell at him so he let go and brought his finger to her lips silencing her.

"You'll wake her." Booth said and Brennan glanced at Ash's room and exhaled as he removed his fingers from her lips.

"We never-" Brennan started.

"I know." Booth finished her thoughts. They had never talked about them, and it was eating them both up. They couldn't ignore their shared yesterdays any longer. Treading water was getting old and it was time to either sink or venture out to sea. They could feel the power the storm generated and though they had jumped ship a long time ago, they had never swum around in the sea. They never had the chance to venture out.

"I heard you." Brennan said glancing up shyly to meet his eyes.

"I know." Booth said as they both stood inches apart in Brennan's living room, shifting their weight from one foot to the other. Awkward silence screamed throughout the apartment and between the partners.

"When do you plan on leaving?" Brennan asked and for a moment Booth looked into the same dark blue eyes that he looked into the night he told her Hannah was pregnant. The night he left. Her question raced in his mind. A tiny voice ebbed its way into his thoughts. 'When are you going to leave her Seeley? You know you don't want too. You just don't know what to do. Tell her, give her a date. Go on. Tell her when you're going to leave her alone again'

"I don't know." Booth said almost unable to look her in her eyes.

Brennan nodded and exhaled walking over to sit on her couch. She looked up at him from the couch, it was dark and her eyes pierced his, "I never hated her Booth. You know that, right?"

Booth nodded yes and Brennan looked away resting her head in her hands she inhaled. "I just wanted you to be happy. Ash and Hannah needed you." Brennan said a bit loudly as she stared at her floor. Her hands blocked her peripheral vision of Booth. Booth closed his eyes at this statement and walked over and sat next to her on the couch.

"I just wanted you happy…" Brennan wouldn't look at him as her voice hitched, but she continued to stare at the floor her hands on either side of her face. He knew one could only be so strong for so long. He rubbed her back and sighed.

"I know…I know Bones." Booth said, never expecting her to be the one to break first. It broke his heart hearing her say this, seeing her break.

"I'm so sorry about Hannah, Booth." Brennan assured him she meant it, turning and looking him in his eyes, "I truly am."

"Thank you Bones."

Brennan nodded, "I know you loved her and I'm sorry."

Booth looked away a second and nodded, "I did, and I don't understand why God took her Bones? Why her and not me?" Booth asked his eyes glossy. Brennan placed her hand on top of his.

"You told me we don't get to choose. That it doesn't work like that." Brennan said to Booth. "I didn't get a choice." Brennan said in that Bones like off the cuff manner. "You had to leave, and I had no choice in the matter."

Booth's eyes grew a bit large understanding her analogy. "Bones…"

She turned to him, large blue doe eyes, "Yes?"

"You weren't the only one Bones. I didn't want to go Bones." Booth said a bit exasperated and serious all at once.

"I know, I said that Booth." Brennan countered.

Booth was taken aback, "I know how you felt Bones. I didn't leave because I wanted too, not that I would change a thing because then I wouldn't have Ash, but really?" Booth asked.

Brennan pulled her hand off his, "But you don't Booth, you don't…" Brennan argued, he didn't know how she felt.

He stopped rubbing her back, his hand just lingered on one spot. "I don't? Are we really going to do this tonight Bones?" Booth looked at her surprised.

Brennan exhaled, "I didn't mean that. No…yes. I don't know." She felt defeated; she didn't know what she felt.

"You said it." Booth countered, exhausted already.

"It just came out." Brennan said quickly adding, "It was an accident." Brennan said and Booth leaned back into the couch letting his hand drop from her back to his lap.

"Yeah, Bones…it just kind of happened, huh?" Booth said to Brennan whose head was turned toward him showing her glossy eyes. Silence lingered as the two stared at each other a moment.

"Nothing just happens Booth." Brennan whispered holding his stare a moment then looking away.

"But it did. Didn't it Bones?" Booth whispered back.

"Did it?" Brennan asked as she looked to him again. Her eyes glossy, lip trembling. Did she dare open that wound up and so soon? But she already had. Hell it had never healed. Sarah was wrong. Brennan had no scars. She was still an open wound, and the blood loss was significant. The trouble was, he was in no condition to stop the blood loss as he too had shed quite a bit as he bled out on her couch then walked out of her door many yesterdays ago. "Did it Booth?" she pushed feeling brave.

"Bones, please don't." Booth warned.

Brennan looked at him and stood up frustrated. "So, we didn't happen?" Brennan asked. "It's okay, I understand." Brennan said trying to make sense of everything that was happening so quickly. It was too soon. She should have known it was too soon to talk of them. What was she thinking, she had no right. Hell today was Hannah's funeral for God's sake, but the glances he had given her throughout it. The many times he had reached for her hand, pulled and sought comfort from her. It was comfortable reliving yesterday-if only for a day.

Angela once told her if you love something you let it go, and if it comes back then it is truly yours. No. She didn't know about all that, that, which was once upon yesterdays, not today. That sounded too nice. She liked Russ's analogy better, 'If you love something you let it go, and if it comes back to you untainted-then it loves ya back.' At least Russ' had a bit of humor.

Booth swallowed, "Bones, wait."

She turned slowly and dark ocean eyes crashed into his deep multilayered canyon eyes filling it to the brim with the emotion. Silence lingered as the two partners shared one of their old locking of orbs. She didn't speak, she just looked at him. A longing for an answer to a question unasked, lingered in her eyes. Though, he wasn't ready. She gave him a shy half-hearted sad smile and turned and walked away into her bedroom.

As he watched her walk away Booth cursed himself and sunk down into the couch alone, but he just wasn't ready. She made it clear they were going to have to revisit yesterdays sooner rather than later. They had happened, and there was no forgetting that. The trouble was he knew he couldn't live with her anymore, but he couldn't live without her either. "Damn it Bones." he whispered to the no ones and nothings of the night as he laid back into the cool leather of the couch. He ran his hand across his face as to wipe the stress of the day away. A warm salty tear left a jagged and crooked track down his cheek. And in a millisecond the storm had changed its course.