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"Can I please go for a walk?" Talia stood in front of Ziva's desk and stretched, looking out over the unseasonably warm and sunny morning. "You stay here and finish up your reports and all. Agent Bates can come with me."
"I don't know…" Ziva hedged.
"C'mon, you got the bad guys! I'll be fine! Besides…" She looked out the window again, chewing on her lip. "I think I would like to...call Abba…"
Ziva opened her mouth but then closed it again and simply nodded after a long moment. "Okay. Just stay on the Navy Yard yes? And please be careful." She gave Talia a long look that clearly said she was talking just as much about her communication with Eli as the threat from the outside world.
"I will, promise."
After an hour of poorly suppressed concern and inefficiency, Ziva gave up on her case notes and went in search of Talia. Finally she found her near the coffee kiosk, Agent Bates sitting unobtrusively a few benches away. Talia was staring out across the landscape with a clearly troubled expression.
Bastard, Ziva thought furiously.
"Tali, what is it?" Ziva asked, sitting down on the bench beside her. "What did he say?"
"Lots of things," she whispered, looking down at her hands. "He said he was happy to hear my voice again, but his has changed so much. He sounds old, Ziva; old and bitter and angry. It wasn't the father I remember."
"Like I said, it's been a long seven years," Ziva sighed, rubbing small circles on her back.
"He said something else," Tali continued hesitantly. "He said he deeply regretted letting any of his children ever step foot on American soil. When I asked him why, he laughed - spitefully - and said to ask you."
Ziva froze and silently cursed Eli once more. After everything that had happened, still he was playing his mind games.
"Tali, I have to tell you something. I should have done it sooner, but...but I need you to just listen to me; all the way through. And then if you want to walk away, I will not stop you," she whispered. Talia's eyes shot up to meet hers. She hesitated for a long moment and then nodded.
Ziva took a deep breath and dove in. She tried to explain how Ari had blamed Eli for his mother's death and how he resented and hated their father. She told of how she and Ari worked together at Mossad: Ari posing as a terrorist to infiltrate their networks while she served as his control officer. How he grew more erratic, more difficult to control until he just disappeared. She managed to choke out that he killed an NCIS agent and began hunting down the rest of the team to make their father suffer.
"Wait," Tali said, unable to stop herself from interrupting. "Ari…our Ari gunned down an innocent woman in cold blood?"
Ziva shook her head slowly. "I did not believe it either. I was determined to protect Ari…Even when Eli ordered me to come here and kill him in order to gain Gibbs' trust…" Tali pulled her hand from Ziva's at this, staring at her.
"You didn't…"
"I didn't believe what Eli said. I took the assignment to come here and protect Ari when another agent would have blindly followed father's orders. But I heard it for myself, Talia," Ziva whispered. "I heard Ari admit to killing Kate; admit to hating our father so passionately, that he made it his life's mission to ruin him. And then…he turned his gun on Gibbs, and I had no choice…" Ziva's voice broke off. She had not met Talia's eyes during the explanation, but now she looked up and saw the horror and pain and betrayal in her sister's face. "I killed Ari," she whispered, barely audible.
Talia took several deep breaths, her eyes darting wildly from side to side as she tried to process this information. "You're lying…"
"No…I wish I were. I wish Ari had stayed the sweet and funny brother that brought you chocolates and made you laugh. But he was twisted and warped over the years into something…"
"STOP IT!" Talia cried out, and Ziva fell silent. "Stop taking my memories from me! Abba and you and Ari…all of my precious memories that I have carried and nurtured over the years of my family! Those people are not real! My real family is full of murderers and liars and…"
"Monsters," Ziva whispered, tears blurring her vision. Talia's gaze flickered back to her, and she swallowed hard.
"I need…I need a break. I need to think," she said hurriedly, standing up and walking away before Ziva could say anything more. She almost followed but then remembered her promise to Talia that she could leave after the truth was out. So she nodded to Agent Bates and he got up and trailed after her.
At least she is safe…Ziva thought, dropping her head into her hands. Safe but heartbroken.
How long she sat there, Ziva did not know. But she jumped when an arm suddenly wrapped around her shoulder.
"Bates called," Tony said quietly, and Ziva's heart jumped into her throat as she shot him a panicked look.
"Talia's fine," he offered quickly. "She's back at the apartment now. But he told me it looked like you two had a pretty big bust up."
Ziva dropped her head back down, scrubbing at her red and irritated eyes. "She now knows the whole truth. She knows the monsters her family became."
"You tell her about Ari?" Tony asked, rubbing soothing circles on her back just as Ziva had done for Talia before everything imploded. She simply nodded.
"So she's angry at you for your loyalty to Gibbs after he killed your brother," Tony sighed, shaking his head.
Ziva raised her gaze to meet his; it was so understanding and sympathetic that she had to fight down the urge to be sick. "I can't believe I've never told anyone," she whispered. "But how could I? How could I have looked any of you in the eye ever again if you knew the truth?"
Tony's brow furrowed. His hand stilled on her back as he stared expectantly, waiting for her to continue.
"Gibbs did not kill Ari," she said, so softly he had to lean in to hear it. "I did."
He felt his eyes grow wide at this shocking confession and took a sharp, deep breath. Ziva visibly flinched, as if expecting some kind of verbal or physical rebuttal from him.
"All these years…" He whispered, his voice abandoning him. He put a finger under her chin, trying to make her meet his eyes. "All these years, you've been carrying that around. Jesus Ziva, I'm so sorry."
The understanding and compassion in his voice and in his touch were too much for her to handle. She'd been holding herself together with sheer, stubborn determination for days; it seemed suddenly ironic that Tony's compassion would be her undoing. Her face crumpled and she did not have the strength to stop the coming tears. A sob escaped her lips, and she leaned into him. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her as close as he could on the confines of the bench.
"I'm sorry…I'm so sorry," she kept repeating. He pressed his cheek against the top of her head; it took everything in his power not to get dragged down into a dangerous spiral by this shocking revelation. So many things that never made sense about Ziva suddenly clicked into place with this one piece of information. He thought back to her early days at NCIS, her close and frankly baffling relationship with Gibbs, her inability to trust anyone. She was far more damaged than even he could have guessed, and now it was out there for the whole world to know.
Including her sister.
"We'll fix it Zi. We'll find a way to make it right."
She wanted to believe his words, but her mind told her some things were too irreparably broken to mend.
Talia halted her pacing when Tony entered the apartment. She glanced behind him, her brow furrowing, "Where's Ziva?"
"She's at the office. She asked me to come by and check on you," Tony replied, throwing his jacket over the back of an arm chair and leaning against it. "She wanted to give you some space."
Talia nodded and resumed wearing a path in the living room floor. "That's good. I need more time to sort through things before we talk again."
The line of Tony's jaw grew taut, and he spoke before he could stop himself. "This is her apartment in case you've forgotten," he said, his voice suddenly icy.
Talia stopped again, surprised by his tone but matching hers in response. "I will gladly check into a hotel if you feel I have overstayed my welcome."
"Ziva would throw a fit if you left. You're still safer here, and she'd rather give her own life than see you harmed. You should remember that next time you're making her feel like shit."
He watched the emotions play across her face at his stinging remarks - guilt, anger, pain, defiance. "My entire world has been turned upside down!" Looked like she was sticking with anger. "Look at all that I have gone through in the past week. I watched my friend's murder and couldn't stop it. I find my beloved sister alive and well again only to discover that my family is hopelessly broken. Forgive me if I need some time to make sense of it all!"
"Grow up Talia," Tony said harshly, not even pausing as the young woman flinched at his words. "It's been a tough time for her as well, proceeded by a near decade of hell that you can't even begin to imagine. But she's done everything she could to shield you from the pain of the truth."
"You told me yourself you are the root of some of that pain!" She retorted without thinking and then bit her lip. He was right; she was lashing out immaturely, and she could see that even through her anger. "Sorry," she mumbled, sinking onto the sofa.
Tony maintained his rigid posture for a long moment, but he unfroze as Talia's head fell into her hands.
"I wasn't lying," he said in a softer but still forceful voice. "I hurt Ziva deeply and it nearly cost her, her life. So you can understand why I want to shield her from further pain whenever I can."
She turned her head in her hands to look over at him. "You know what she told me today?"
"I do."
"Can you not understand, then?" She asked, her voice pleading. "Why I'm having a hard time? I can't imagine a world in which my sweet, loving big brother could murder someone in cold blood. Or that my Abba could ask Ziva to kill him. Or that she could actually pull the trigger."
Tony studied her for a long moment. "Talia, why did you father tell Ziva and Ari that you were dead?"
She gave him a bewildered look at the sudden change in conversation. "To protect me!" She answered automatically, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
He shook his head. "No, that's why he told you that THEY were dead. To give you a clean break and a fresh start at a safe life. But why not let them in on the secret? What does he gain by telling them you were murdered?"
Tali opened and closed her mouth several times, a trace of uncertainly in her eyes. "I guess I see no reason…" she finally offered in a quiet voice.
"And that's because you thankfully lack your father's Dr. Evil gene," Tony sighed. "Eli groomed Ari and Ziva to be his super soldiers since they were kids. Were you at all surprised when Ziva ended up at Mossad right out of her conscription? But what was the best way to cement their dedication to the cause? To ensure that they would be the cold and emotionless killers that Eli wanted?"
Tali's face twisted, her eyes closing as realization finally hit her. "By telling them I had died in a terrorist attack. Oh God..." she whispered. Tony just nodded.
"Ziva's done some horrible things in her life; she'll be the first to admit it. But she and Ari were abused…for years…by your father. They were twisted until they didn't know right from wrong, up from down. And it broke something inside of Ari. He shot my partner Kate right through the forehead. Her blood sprayed all over my face," Tony whispered in a hushed voice. Talia let out a small whimper, shaking her head for him to stop, but he continued. "Your father made him into a monster, Talia. And Ziva still had enough humanity left in her to stop him…even if it meant killing her own flesh and blood."
Talia was crying now, silently but earnestly. Tony sighed, pushing away from the chair to crouch down in front of her. He took her chin in his hand, waiting until she looked at him.
"Ziva didn't want to tell you the truth," he said gently. "She wanted you to keep your happy memories of Ari and Eli…and even of herself…Your sister would lay down her life to avoid causing you pain. Please remember that when she comes home."
With that, he rose silently and, with one more nod of his head in her direction, left her alone with her thoughts.
It was late and Talia was asleep by the time Ziva returned. She had wandered around the office until Gibbs pointed at the elevator and simply said "Home!" She hadn't wanted to face another round of Talia's anger and disappointment. She was too afraid, too tired; not that she would ever let such an admission pass through her stubborn lips. She wished there was some fixed point in time to which she could return and untangle this mess, but it was with weary resignation she realized that it would have to be before her own birth.
It was after one before she fell into a fitful sleep and barely three when a noise roused her from it. She sat up, perfectly still, as her ears strained for further disturbances. Probably Talia or Agent Griffiths, she told herself, but her hand was ignoring the rationalizations and already reaching for a gun. The sudden shouts and unmistakable whistle of bullets fired through a silencer sounded loud in her carefully attuned ears, catapulting her out of bed and toward the hallway. Talia appeared in her doorway, her face sleepy and confused, "What -"
More shouts then as something smashed against the front door. Ziva grabbed Talia's arm, sprinting across the apartment towards the kitchen. "Fire escape!" She yelled. They were halfway across the living room when the wood splintered, two canisters sailing through in a graceful arc.
"Get down!" Ziva screamed, pulling Talia to the ground behind the couch and throwing herself over the younger woman. A second later, the room exploded in sound and light. Through the ringing in her ears, Ziva peered, dazed, over the top of the couch to see three men in full gear entering the smoke-filled room. Despite the haze and stars still blooming across her vision, she fired three shots, one hitting her target just above the vest. He dropped like a stone as she crouched down again, a spray of bullets exploding over their heads from the other two gunmen.
Ziva had seven clips hidden throughout her apartment and she swore loudly when she realized that not a single one was within reach. She had two above her fridge, if they could just make it that far…
The shooting ceased and she whispered urgently, "I don't have enough rounds to waste. You have to make a run for the kitchen. I will cover you."
Talia's terrified expression turned Ziva's stomach. "I can't!"
"You must! I will be right behind you, I promise. Now GO!"
She gave a little shove at Talia's back and stood up as much as she dared. Her aim was that of a professional killer, but so was theirs. She got off exactly five shots, the last finding its mark in one gunman's shoulder, before she felt a searing heat tear through her right side, a bullet traveling cleanly through the back of the sofa and then her skin. She cried out automatically but the pain was second to horror as she saw Talia pause in the kitchen doorway and turn back to her.
"NO! KEEP GOING!" Ziva gasped, fighting to stand again, but her body betrayed her and collapsed. She glanced down and was momentarily surprised by the amount of blood she could already see pooling on the dark floor. Too late! a panicked voice in her head screamed as she tried to push herself up, gun shaking in her hand. One gunman ran forward then as the other let loose another volley of bullets over Ziva's head. She heard Talia cry out and pulled herself up frantically until she could just see around the corner of the couch. One of the men grabbed Talia around the waist and dragged her towards the front door. She was kicking and fighting for all she was worth, but with absolute desperation, Ziva realized that the well-sheltered girl had never learned how to defend herself.
The bullets didn't stop until the men were back out in the apartment corridor. Ziva bolted from behind the couch and made it two steps before her legs gave out. With a cry of fury, she tried again but couldn't even get to her feet. She fought for a deep breath and willed the darkness at the edges of her vision to recede, but she couldn't stop it. She crawled exactly three feet before she was overcome by sudden and inescapable blackness.
Ooooo cliffhangers! *evil grin* I kinda love 'em. But I shan't make the wait too long!
Did I mention reviews make the world go round? :)
