Here's the next chapter, i apologise for the long wait, been a bit busy. I just wanted to say thanks to all of you who have reviewed, alerted and added this story to their favourites. It means a lot, the feedback is great, and i would love some more. ;) So here it is, chapter 4. Enjoy and let me know your feelings on it. :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or any of the characters.
To say being woken up by Puck, still in Britt's arms was confusing would be an understatement, but that confusing soon left after the memories of last night came flooding back in, i'm surprise i remembered, glad, but surprised. As great as this feels, i can't help but groan as he tries to get us up, i don't want this feeling to ever leave.
"Piss off, Puck." I groan, nuzzling back into Brittany's neck, i feel her stir and wake up as Puck once again attempts to get us up.
"My parent's will be back later, so you either leave, or stay longer and help me with clean up duties. Your choice, Lopez." He replies, and a moment later i feel Britt move to sit up.
"I should go anyways.." She replies, I look into her eyes and i can't tell how she is feeling, i can usually read this girl better than anything. Hell, i know her more than i know myself right now, but behind her eyes kind of looks blank. Does she regret staying last night?
"B, i thought you wanted to talk?" I speak, still trying to wake myself up as she slides off the bed to make her way towards the door.
"Later, I promise, ok?" She looks sincere, ill give her a little time to think about this anyways. I give her a sad smile as she leaves, giving Puck a small nod on her way past. I look up to him just staring at me, looking slightly curious.
"What?" I say rather coldly, i don't know if it's the major headache from being hungover, or the fact I'm nervous about talking with Britt but i don't feel so good.
"I'm a little confused, i walk in to you's being all lovey dovey while sleeping, then she's kind of in a hurry to leave. You didn't get drunk and just lady bone her right?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.
"No, Puckerman!" I say and grab a pillow from beside my head and throw it at him. "We actually just talked, and she said we could talk properly when we're sober, that's at least something right?" I say hopefully.
"Well she wouldn't even say a word to you last night, so i would definitely say this is a step in the right direction, that doesn't explain the spooning though..?" He asked, still a little curious.
"I don't even know to be honest, I just asked her to stay the night and she agreed to." I explain.
"Ok, just be honest for once Lopez, let her in completely, let her understand. You do this, everything will workout. Now, i wasn't joking about the clean up, your choice." He asks with a slight smirk.
"Yeah…. sorry, but… no thanks." I say jumping up from the bed quickly, regretting it the minute i get to my feet as my head spins out of control. Puck just stand there laughing. "Shut up." I say, punching him in the arm which makes his laughter fit escalate. "Later, Puckerman." I say walking past him and out the front door.
I haven't heard from Brittany yet, and it's almost 6 o'clock. I decide on taking the initiative and texting her first.
B, do you think i could come over or something? -S
I hit send, nervously awaiting. It's at least 2 minutes before my phone goes off in my hand signalling a new text.
Uh, yeah ok, promise is a promise. -B
Thanks Britt, be there in 15. -S
As soon as i hit send i'm already up and looking for my keys. I take them off my bedside table and head for the door.
It takes me no more than 15 minutes and I'm already standing at her front door. I enter the house making it to the bottom of the stairs before realising i hadn't knocked. Habbit i guess. I consider going back outside just to knock but consider it to be pointless seeing as i'm already inside. It looks as if her parents aren't home aswell which is always a pus, whether fighting or not. I slowly head up the stairs and towards her bedroom. I take notice of the fact her door isn't close so i look into the room to see Britt on her bed, with Lord Tubbington in her lap sleeping. This puts a smile on my face, she's just so cute i can't even. I realise i can't just stand her and admire her cuteness all night…. well i could, but i shouldn't. I decide on knocking on the door frame, then leaning against it. She looks up from patting her cat to give me a small smile.
"You can come in you know?" She looks up with a raised eyebrow.
"Oh, yeah… sorry." I say, feeling slightly stupid. I walk up to the edge of her bed and decide on sitting next to where she's sitting, legs crossed on top of the bed. As i sit, Lord Tubbington wakes and makes a run out the door, which leave no distraction from our soon to be conversation.
"Parents not home?" I ask, needing some form of conversation to begin with.
"Nope, gone to visit my Aunt and Uncle, they'll be back around Friday night. So for the next few days it's just me and Lord Tubbington." She smiles, I'm guessing at the thought of spending so much time with him.
"Oh, ok. Look B, i gotta ask….. Do you regret staying with me last night or something? You seemed pretty quick to leave this morning.." I ask, looking straight into her eyes. She quickly looks to the right, avoiding eye contact.
"Ummm… I .. I don't regret it, no. I just know that i promised you a sober conversation and i got freaked out. I know i said i would, and you know i keep my promises, it's just…. it hurts to much to talk about this ok. The image of you being with someone else makes me feel sick to my stomach. I'd dealt with this before we got together, you refusing to admit your feelings, so i would watch you consistently get with different guys. It feels like i'm back at that same place right now Santana, do you know what that feel like?" She asks looking back into my eyes, i quickly just look down in shame, shaking my head slightly. "Well it hurts more than anything San, it feel like you've gone back to that person who wouldn't let me in, who needed to prove to herself she doesn't have emotions, but you do Santana, you do, and you're pushing them away. Not only are you pushing your feelings away, you're pushing me away, and if you keep doing this every time you have the slightest thought of possibly getting hurt, you're going to completely lose me, i can't keep doing this…." She finishes, and i lift my head up, and straight away she notices the tears rolling down my cheeks. I wasn't expecting her to just open up like that. She must have just needed to get it all out, but it kills me to know i put this girl through that much hurt, she doesn't deserve that at all.
"Maybe…" I say sniffling back a few more tears. "Maybe you wouldn't hurt this much… I-if you just left me… You deserve better Britt!" I say, a few sobs escaping.
"No, Santana." She says while moving to grab my hand. Making me look right into her eyes. She looks very sincere, i can tell she just wants me to open up completely. "I don't." She finishes.
"Yes, you do!" I say, slightly raising my voice, she gives my hand a slight squeeze, running her thumb over the top of my hand. This instantly calms me down and i am able to continue on with what i was saying. "You don't deserve someone who would put you through this damn pain, B. You deserve someone better. I'm sorry, i really am…. for everything. I guess i was just scared, that little jealously i got from you flirting with someone else brought all of these new worries into my head, and suddenly i felt like i was the one who was going to get hurt. I freaked out, and reversed it…. What kind of person would do that to the person they love…. I love you so much it hurt, and that scares the shit out of me, your the first person i've ever opened myself up to, and i never ever intended to make you feel this horrible, i swear? But god, you deserve so much better, B, but when i think about it, i don't want anyone else having anything remotely close to what we have, that thought makes me sick to my stomach, i want to be the one who can give you everything a partner is supposed to give. If you'll just let me, i'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you, ill do anything!" I say, fresh tears rolling down my face and I continues to look into Brittany's eyes. She hasn't said a word yet, i really don't know what's going through her head but i really need to know before i let my thoughts drive me crazy. "B, say something please." I say, feeling worried as hell.
"No, it's just… I've never seen you this honest San." She says looking straight into my eyes. "I always knew you were scared… just not to this extent, and i'm sorry i haven't made you feel more safe while being with m.." She speaks but i cut her off.
"No, B. Don't you dare apologise for any of this! I've never felt more safe with anyone before, but at the same time i've never felt so open and exposed, you have the potential to completely break me, B. I don't know what would ever happen if you were to just leave me, i can't even." I say shaking my head, making me think about losing her forever makes me sick, i pick her hand that in mind and bring it up to my lips, kissing her knuckles. She smiles at the sweet gesture and moves a little closer.
"As much as you bug me sometimes, San. I don't think i could ever leave you for good." She chuckles, lifting my chin to look in her eyes.
"But…. I mean…. d-does this mean you'll take me back?" I say, she is literally the only person who can make me so nervous that i stutter, it's funny.
"I'm saying I'm willing to try and work this out okay, i can't lose you…. i just can't, and i'm not willing to, so I guess that's what this mean, just please please please don't make me regret this…."She says, looking at me.
"I'll never put you through this again, B. You're the only person that matters to me in this world. I love you so much." I say, placing my hand on her cheek, staring directly into her eyes.
"I really could get used to you saying that though." She smirks at this, i know she'd be loving this right now.
"Well….. get used to it, because for you, they will become my 3 new favourite words." I say smiling, and now she's taking control and leans in placing her lips against mine. My hand on her cheek doesn't move, but my right hand moves for her hip as i deepen the kiss. He hand moves to my thigh as her other hand moves for my neck, pulling me in closer and she slides her tongue past my lips, which i of course return. We remain like this for about 10 minutes, moving between heavy make-outs, to just sweet little kisses. She breaks and places her forehead against mine. This seems like i good time to ask something that has been on my mind all night.
"B." I whisper.
"Mhmm?" She replies, holding my hand in hers.
"I was wondering, you said you were stay alone her for another 5 nights right?" I ask.
"…yeah?" she asks, raising her eyebrow.
"Uh, do you wanna stay with me some nights? I know you hate being alone. We can even stay here some nights if that's what you want, what do you think?" I ask hopefully, it may be too soon, but despite everything that's happened i don't want her alone for 5 nights anyways.
"What about Lord Tubbington?" She asks, i forgot about the cat….
"Um.. i can make sure we come here everyday to feed him and stuff?" I say.
"I don't know, what if he gets scared too, he's scared of the dark, San… like me." She says. God she's so adorable.
"Ok." I say pulling away and smiling at here.
"Ok?" She repeats, slightly confused.
"Well, we have no other choice, Lord Tubbing comes too." I say, shaking my head at that thought, good thing my parents are away as well, i doubt they'd like the thought of a cat in their house…
"Really?" She squeals in excitement. "I love you, I love you." She says giving me a quick peck before jumping up from the bed. "Be right back, going to get his suitcase." And with that she skips and of the room.
"Wait, what B, his suitcase?" I yell after her, shaking my head…. What exactly have i gotten myself into? I laugh to myself. Atleast i got my girl, thats all that matters.
About 20 minutes later and we're headed back to mine. We get home around midnight, i can tell Britt is super tired so we decide on bed, falling asleep in her arms for he second night sounds amazing, i can definitely get used to this again… After about 10 minutes of cuddling, we drift off into a peaceful sleep, Britt, me….. and Lord Tubbington.
And there's chapter 4. Drop me a review, even on anonymous. Let me know your thoughts, what you'd like to see happen and any tips or anythings along those lines, you know the deal. ;) Thanks for sticking with the story, hopefully another chapter coming soon.