The names are not mine, the rest - is.
Boys Vs Girls
Attempting to wrestle with my food whilst high was not the best idea I have come up with in over a hundred years, by any means. Jasper called Emmett, and I slumped against a tree as the rain fell a mess around my fucked up evening. I watched the leaves bob under the relentless precipitation, the pounding of the rainfall battering them time and time again. I sat surrounded by luscious dark greens and musty indecipherable blacks waiting for my brothers. We're fighting to survive, fighting on the side of humans. This is the only time. The only time I don't think of her, completely wrapped in who she might be. Except to wonder...could she ever want someone like me?
My rage is bubbling and I can no longer wait for any of this, for them to bring me what I need.
When they arrived, the savagery was over quickly. And though I would have liked more, Jasper cut me off before we could create any incidents in town. The family wouldn't approve so we left.
When we got back to WV Six, there were students asleep on the green, students asleep in the halls, students staggering aimlessly, no doubt attempting their way home. But our room and my bed were a perfect pleasure after the confusion I was left with after the weird night I had. I spoke to Bella. I think I may have mentioned her scent, most certainly giving her an impression I'd rather she not have. Her scent. Not exactly a classic twentieth-century chase, that's for sure. I think it's safe to say I've muddied any proper first impressions. Made evident by this evening's events I'm all too aware of her effect on me. She was the reason I was so hungry. She was the reason I turned green, hooked up and bound. She wore a dress, sexy and alluring, though I tried not to look because she seemed afraid, nervous and unsure, so I took her hand, and Ifelt strong. In that moment, I felt the room get smaller, the colours disappear, the sounds drown out. I felt like we both might explode from the connection. It felt good, more so than I've ever known. It felt dangerous and new and I wanted to keep doing it. But I couldn't take the pressure after a few minutes. It got way too dangerous, being way too close to her, with that many humans in such a small space. It took everything, everything I had in me to not fucking drink from her. I touched Bella. Her wrist was painted with blood lines again, like it always is. Like she always is. I'm so hungry around her, I see it all. Rushing around. Pumping in tune, in time to my thirst. I couldn't look away. I wanted to drag her out of there and run away, across the green and out past the trees into the meadow and drink.
I have to start over.
I have to get a grip.
And I have to touch her again.
Tomorrow.
-o-
My head hurts and I think I ate too many marshmallows. Nettie and Rose took me into the woods to smoke. I'm not sure why, but we did and then we smoked probably only like half a joint between us and then we ate marshmallows and then we got creeped out. I could hear stuff, stuff you can't normally hear, I felt overwhelmed, and my perception was beginning to freak me out. I couldn't stop imagining a thousand spiders crawling all over me and they were laughing and I was hysterical with fear. We grabbed the marshmallows and ran.
Now my head hurts. And Nettie looks perfect. As always. Her face is round like mine, and she has green eyes, whereas mine are brown. She has light, wavy hair, and mine is dark and curly. She's tall, taller than me and almost angel like. She's so free, she's so brave. I wear my socks and worry all day that people care. She looks good and says she feels fine. My head hurts.
And we have class in an hour, she has Art and I have French. With Edward.
"Nettie. Um...what do you think like...I mean, if you like someone, how would you... How do I go about telling them, or finding out if they like me? You're like, a flirt. I wanna do that..."
She's giggling at my silly. She's crimping her hair, and giggling at my questions..
I feel a little juvenile asking but Edward held my hand, he held my hand. Whatever he thought, whatever he felt, I felt it. I feel it. And I think maybe if we were alone, he might have kissed me or something and I don't know...how do you know how to do the stuff you don't know before you know...you know?
AN:
As always - I thank The Boy; he keeps me in order.
Due to a new venture, (I just opened an Etsy shop) I'm playing with the schedule a little. I hope you'll find me on the new days - Next chapter: Friday.
Your thoughts and comments are as pleasant as Edward climbing into bed...naked. Come play!
Please and thank you!
samrosey. xo