I don't own Naruto and I'm alright with that
"It enhances the legend".
"Wait, he honestly said that?"
"Yes, he looked me dead in the eyes and said that."
"How did you respond?"
"Jiraiya, how do you respond to something like that? I just stared at him and him me and then asked if he really just said that. He replied, with all seriousness, "Tsunade-san, when you're going to be the best to ever do it, concerns about sticking out become immaterial."
Jiraiya can barely contain his laughter at the exchange between his apprentice and teammate. Jiraiya, himself, had attempted to get the young shinobi to let go of that orange jumpsuit but to no avail. Naruto actually lectured Jiraiya on the absurdity of criticizing the jumpsuit. Points ranging from, "what kind of sense does it make to look like a shinobi if avoiding attention is your goal?" to, "I'm having a fight in a stadium full of people, stealth will hardly be an issue, Pervy Sage. You doubting the orange makes me question your greatness." After that he vowed to just leave the topic alone, guessing everyone who meets Naruto has to learn this particular lesson.
"Tsu-hime, you have to admit that Kushina would have said something similar. Hell, for all I know, she had said something similar at some point. Girl didn't suffer from a lack of confidence."
Thinking back on the Uzumaki, Tsunade smiles fondly, "No, she really didn't."
The room falls silent. Jiraiya notices Tsunade seems to be building up to say something, seeing the internal conflict play out on her face.
"I was happy in my misery, you know. Then you two show up. Why couldn't you have just left me alone? But no, you and the kid come here and now I'm actually considering going back. Damnit, you always do this, Jiraiya."
"I always do what?"
"You put ridiculous notions in people's heads, like peace in the Elemental Nations and you're so goddamn sure you make people want to believe you. But what does peace for shinobi look like? We order children to slit slightly fewer throats? You don't know but you filled that kid's head with your nonsense… and he reminds me of Nawaki in so many ways but also what Nawaki could have been if exposed to the darkness too long.
Naruto, he's like afraid of he's natural brightness, the sun that prefers cloudy days and I don't understand how my village, the legacy of my grandfather could do that to a child. You want me to go back but I know nothing of the village so how can I lead it? Why are you sticking me with this?"
"I don't know what Naruto has said to you but I'm not sticking you with anything, I wouldn't be leaving you alone but you are the best for the position. You must realize it since you don't claim otherwise. Tsunade, it's time to come home. It's time to give Shizune the option to settle down. And it's time for you to save your family's legacy. Sensei has been consumed with his failures and prevention to focus on positive change. I believe Naruto is a result of that and my own negligence. I'm he's godfather and I trusted Sensei to take care of my responsibilities because looking at a chibi Minato was too hard. I replay that conversation he had with you, how much of his life is dictated by fear. I need that to change. I believe he's the child of prophecy. Every time in the past I believed I found him, I trained them but left the hard parts to them and each fell before they could truly make a change. I don't want to do that this time, I can't just give Naruto the weight of the world and tell him to figure it out. I also can't leave it to him if he doesn't see the world as worth saving. Did you notice he never refers to Minato as his father, only his title? I think he resents Minato and his sacrifice. He may very well resent Sensei, too. If Naruto remains isolated he may not be willing to do what is required of him."
"So, you're using us both for your own goals?"
"Yes. If that's really how you see it then yes, I'm using you. Seriously Tsunade? You aren't a puppet, I just think you both can make positive changes to the village and the shinobi system if given enough time and support. There isn't any hidden schemes here, I'm pretty open about why I want you to come back."
"But you aren't with him. Are you going to tell him you believe he's the savior?"
"No, because he's not ready yet. I need him to become more attached to the village, to believe the Will of Fire is more than the source of his misery. When that changes then I can tell him about all of this."
Tsunade, never known for her patience is quickly running out, "It HAS! It has been the source of his misery, you needing him to not be aware of it before you reveal your scheme doesn't change that. And what about considering what he needs? You know, like having his opinions validated. Someone acknowledging he's gotten a raw deal, that he was denied even the memory of his parents. You may believe he has this grand destiny but how can you show up after a decade plus absence and then just shove this on him? It's not fair."
"Are you sure you're coming back because it doesn't sound like it. As far as Naruto, I'm not going around in circles with you. Sometimes you're called for a larger purpose, regardless of if you want it or not. The kid is meant for more and I intend to start preparing him for it."
"Hypocrite."
"I'm sorry, Tsunade, what was that?"
"I'm pretty sure hearing is important for a spy so you heard me. I think you're asking me for a justification, which I'm more than happy to oblige. You say people are sometimes called to serve, yes? As you were, tasked with looking after a small child with no support network. It seems you had very little issue not answering that call but you manage to tell others to suck it up and deal with it. That makes you, among other things, a hypocrite."
"Hypocrite or not doesn't make the argument any less valid. My having failed in the past doesn't give Naruto the right to do so in the future."
"Oh, so you have his life all planned out now? I'm sure he'll appreciate a heads up. It'll simplify things, not having to make very many choices and won't conflict at all with his overriding need for freedom. Or in five years he'll snap and kill everyone he holds responsible for his enslavement, if he doesn't get himself killed because there is freedom in death."
To this, Jiraiya can only look on, mortified. He knows she isn't wrong but can only hope Naruto is the child of prophecy and isn't irreparably harmed to the point of choosing the wrong path. Taking a moment to collect himself Jiraiya responds, "I can't ignore what he may potentially be, it isn't an option. I can try to make it up to him, try to give him now what I couldn't then but it'll have to be enough. Sometimes not good enough has to be enough. Is it unfair? Yes, it is and he may resent me for it for the rest of his life but the world doesn't care. His enemies don't care and time doesn't stop because he got the short end of the stick."
"The short end of the stick? You arrogant asshole, that's what you call my life?"
".. N-Naruto? How long have you been here?"
"Long enough, to learn I have a new Hokage, a godfather and some bullshit destiny that I will bend too or else. So, not that long. Hey, Tsunade-san, congratulations. We should find Shizune-san and celebrate."
"Naruto, I know this sounded bad but please let me explain"
"What is there to explain, Sensei? You say I have to do something and I have to do it. If not you won't train me and there aren't a lot of people that could train you to fight S-class shinobi so I either obey or you leave me to get killed. More of the same, I suppose. So, Tsunade-san, what are you up for, my treat? Although, I guess I should start calling you Tsunade-sama, huh?"
Both sannin can only look at the orange clad ninja, neither knowing what to say. Naruto takes note of being studied, hoping they'll say something if he waits long enough, however a lifetime of glares has left him with a low tolerance for being blankly looked at so he continues,
"Why are you staring at me? It feels weird. If you need some time to decide I can come back in a bit, see what Shizune is up to, ne?"
"Naruto, you heard some things before you were ready and I'm sorry for that and for being"
"Entirely dismissive of my life, one you made a point to not be a part of?" Naruto interrupted.
"Yes, that. I'm so"
"No, you aren't. Which is fine, on no grounds can I actively fight a sannin so you'll get your way but don't apologize for failing to manipulate me, it's inherently contradictory."
"I wasn't going to manipulate you."
"Yes, you were, Jiraiya." Tsunade chimes in. "It seems like you and sensei both string information along to Naruto when you think he will respond as you want him to, that's manipulation. Be honest, would you have told him about his parents if he didn't already know? Would you have told him you're his godfather anytime soon?"
"I would have when he was ready, this information leaking could be dangerous."
To this Naruto could only laugh. "So, I'm trusted to be a shinobi. I'm trusted to try to earn a promotion to receive increased security clearance and keep it a secret but not know about things no one had any right to keep from me? Also, if I'm your student, isn't the very act of being around you dangerous? I hate people who lie to themselves. You were going to string along information when I demonstrated I was sufficiently obedient. Just like Sarutobi, and hell probably Kakashi if his plan wasn't to outright get me killed. What I don't get is the need to be so sneaky about it. I know what you want, I'm going to do it so why continue to hide things from me?"
"Because Naruto, it doesn't work like that. You aren't doing this out of love for your village or a sense of duty. You need to have those things to accomplish what I believe you can accomplish. As you are now, you're biding your time until presented with a better option. You may insist otherwise, you may even believe it but I've been around too long to not see it. If people don't have something deeper driving them, something more than acquiescence they won't have the determination to see it through to the end. Making you more powerful isn't enough. Tell me, Naruto, what do you believe in?"
"That's none of your concern."
"But it is and since she's going to be Hokage it's her concern too. So, answer the question. Or if it is too broad at least tell me if you believe in the Will of Fire."
"I've never seen the Will of Fire to know if I believe it or not."
"Nice dodge, Naruto, but conceptually do you believe in the Will of Fire? Do you believe it is a viable philosophy?"
"I believe it's a bullshit lie that cost me my parents for trash that wasn't worth their sacrifice. You happy? Can we go eat now? You never talk to me this much, not even when you're supposedly training me can I hold your attention this long. I'm uncomfortable with the shift in dynamic."
"This isn't a joke Naruto."
"Hai, Sensei!"
"Naruto", for the first time after a long silence Tsunade speaks up, "do you resent the village?"
"Hai"
"But what about those you care for? What about what you learned during your mission in Wave?"
"Having precious people in a hostile environment is giving people like Sarutobi and Jiraiya hostages or leverage. They'll eventually find a way to take them away from me because they always do and since Jiraiya wants me to be a weapon for the village how can I do that and protect those I care about from them? Blind obedience would seem to be the answer and yet I'm being told it isn't enough. I need to lie to myself and call it something else. People always call me an idiot. My stupid teammates loved nothing more than to call me "deadlast" and yet I'm actively punished for demonstrating self-awareness. I can't win. You, "Naruto pointing to Jiraiya, "probably preferred the little hyperactive idiot that was filled with so much love for his village he'd do anything to earn their approval. As if I have anything to prove to them."
Every word of Naruto's answer pierced Jiraiya's heart. Hearing how angry and resentful he is toward not only the village or Sarutobi but him as well hurts the sannin more than he could ever articulate. Searching desperately for any argument that could sway Naruto but is coming up empty. The Toad Sage for the first time is truly afraid that all the choices made for Naruto have started him on a dark path, one they won't be able to change. Conversations with his Sensei about the threat Naruto poses to the village are swimming in his head. 'Could sensei have been right,' Jiraiya wonders.
Tsunade, looking at the young ninja, sees not just her younger brother in Naruto but also sees a lot of herself. The fear of loss and sense of abandonment laced in Naruto's words were the same things that drove her away all those years ago. She understands that while it may take years for him to fully deal with these emotions, if left unchecked or handled improperly right now the harm may be irrevocable. Tsunade decides on a risky gambit, "Naruto, how do you feel about your parents."
"I don't understand the question, I know very little about them. Hell, my mother may as not even exist as much as she's not mentioned in the village. Why do you ask, Tsunade-san?"
"I'll answer that when you answer my question. How do you, right now, feel about them?"
"Why does it matter? No one cared if I even knew who they were so why does it matter?"
"I told you I'd answer that when answer my question."
"Well, I'm not answering it. I'll be back later, I'm going to train."
Jiraiya grabs Naruto by the shoulders before he can leave. "Naruto you need to answer the question."
"To hell with you, Jiraiya. I don't need to answer it, it's not important. It doesn't matter how I feel, it sure didn't matter to them! They left me alone. They chose the village over me and left me with people that were at best indifferent. They left me with no protection, no safeguards but with an expectation I'd serve the village. They were cowards, they should have killed me, too. But they didn't and they set the standard that everyone and everything takes priority over me. There, you happy? I hate them. They should have chose me. I needed them and it didn't matter. I need them and it doesn't matter. I'm alone and the people who should be here chose not to be and if that wasn't enough the Yondaime cursed me on his way out the door."
"Naruto, it wasn't like that. Minato and Kushina they loved you and I'm sure he sealed the Kyuubi in you because he believed in you."
"I don't care. I don't care if they loved me, I don't care if they believed in me. The love of dead people is worthless. If they loved me so much they would have found a way to stay with me but they didn't. They chose the village and I'll always hate them for it. So, are we all happy now? You have even more reason to keep things from me or stall my progress because I'd rather have your precious village burn to the ground if the cost of saving it was the life I've led. And now having said this in front of the future Hokage, I get to go back to a potentially openly hostile village and wait for what the old man will do once you report this. God, guess I've given him reason to order that loyalty seal put on me, huh?"
At the mention of a loyalty seal Tsunade and Jiraiya both look stunned. Tsunade manages to speak first, "Naruto, I get that the village has made you suffer but you don't honestly think Sensei would do that, do you?"
"Why not? Wouldn't be the first time, would it Jiraiya? Wonder what you and the Yamanaka would cook up this time to make sure I'm a good boy."
"Jiraiya what is he talking about?"
"It's not what you think. Sensei was trying to protect Naruto."
"Protect me? Bullshit, he was trying to control me and you gave him what he wanted. Tell her Jiraiya. Tell her how I screamed and begged you to stop, to just leave me be. Only for five years later, when I refuse to use the very power you all made me afraid of you threw me off a cliff."
"So, you're in contact with it?"
"Tsunade what Jiraiya is refusing to tell you is that when I was eight I managed to meet the Kyuubi while trying to unlock my chakra. I talked to him and while he was all around unhappy to be sealed in and I quote "a weakass kit" it was nicer to me than the villagers. I was so happy to finally know, know why they hated me that like the good little idiot I was I went to the person I trusted most and told him. Jiraiya would you like to cover the rest? How you, Sarutobi and Inoichi snuck into my apartment under the cover of darkness. How I was only awaken because Kyuubi warned me. How the Hokage held me down as I begged him to stop, while he kept saying it was for my own good? Or how much pain the seal caused, how I screamed to make it stop? No? How about the suggestion Inoichi placed in my head after locking away the memory? Fear the kyuubi. Don't trust it. Be defiant toward it."
"Although I shouldn't be surprised. According to the kyuubi Sarutobi had you do the same thing to my mother."
Kind of a heavy chapter, huh? The next one won't be as I plan to have bits of levity intermixed with all the drama because I'm not here to make you think about death and get sad and stuff :)