Part IX

The cabdriver that arrived to pick up Chris and Kim gave the pair of them a long look.

"What are the two of you doing calling a cab? Where's your parents?"

Before Chris could say a word, Kim piped up.

"We're going to the hospital. That's where our Daddy is."

Seeing the newspaper on the seat next to the driver, Chris pointed to it.

"Our dad's the paramedic that was hurt in that explosion on Christmas Eve. Roy DeSoto."

"You kids always take a cab to the hospital?"

"Oh no. Dad would normally drive us. But he's there and he said we're too young to ride any bus that isn't a school bus by ourselves."

"Well, he's got that right. Fine then, climb on in. You know what room he's in?"

"Oh yes, sir. We've already been by to visit him once."

Before she settled down, Kim pulled out a slightly squashed Christmas present in hopes of keeping it from getting further flattened in her pocket. Seeing that, the driver melted a bit. He had kids of his own.

"That for your Dad, honey?"

"Yes, sir. He hasn't been able to open any of his Christmas presents yet because he hasn't been able to come home yet. I thought if he could at least open one, it would make him feel better."

"I'm sure it will."

Looking around, the cabbie saw a woman watching from the picture window of a nearby house and assumed that she had be the mother of the kids. Must have one even younger at home that needed looking after. Satisfied with that thought, he made sure the door was firmly shut and started on the trip to Rampart.

At the hospital, Johnny was half-dozed out in a chair near Roy when a slight movement followed by a soft distressed noise brought him back fully awake. It wasn't too difficult to figure that his partner was having a nightmare. It wasn't too big of a stretch to guess that it was likely about the apartment fire.

Johnny's guess as to the subject of the nightmare was correct. Roy's mind had gone back to the first explosion that knocked him off of his feet and injured his ribs. The restraints caused his dreams to veer off what had actually happened. In this twisted scenario, the explosion trapped him. His worst fear - not only trapped himself in a doomed building, but unable to search for the missing child.

Just words weren't getting through to his partner, so Johnny took a gamble and fumbled a bit as he worked to release the restraint on the bandaged arm. Once he finally managed to get it loose, he grabbed Roy's hand and held it tight with both of his.

"Roy! I'm right here with you, pally. You made it out. We all made it out. Me, you and the kids. Come on. You can feel my hand, right? Take a deep breath and calm down."

To Johnny's relief, Roy obeyed his voice that time and took a deep breath. It wasn't an intentional thought, but the pain that the deep breath caused his ribs woke Roy the rest of the way up. Wincing, he opened his eyes, then turned his head until he could see Johnny. Then he relaxed again though a frown formed when he discovered he couldn't shift his position due to the remaining restraints.

"Johnny? What's all this about?"

"You pulled out your IV and tried to make an escape run, Roy. Brackett wasn't happy about you being found on the floor."

The memory suddenly clicked in place.

"Joanne. Joanne was here, but she didn't talk to me. She wouldn't even look at me."

"I saw her leaving as Mike was bringing me back. What happened?"

"I don't know. There was some noise and I startled awake. I thought I was going to lose it again, but I closed my eyes and stayed still and the nausea finally passed. Then there was a soft noise and I took the chance and opened my eyes again. She was just standing there, looking at me. Then she turned her back on me and left. I really screwed up this time, didn't I?"

The despondant look in the blue eyes he knew so well bothered Johnny and he couldn't keep his thoughts to himself. And he didn't want to.

"Quit that. Right now. I am not going to let you turn this around and make it your fault somehow. Because it's not. We were on that shift because we were told to be on that shift. If anyone's to blame, it's that idiot that endangered that building and everyone in it by deciding that was the perfect spot to hide his distillery. We did everything we could and, as a result, not a single life was lost."

Giving Roy's free hand a firm squeeze, he continued.

"Feel irritated. Feel mad. Feel confused. But don't you dare feel guilty."

Looking up toward the ceiling, Roy let out a soft sigh that his ribs made him regret.

"I think what I most feel is hurt. Followed closely by discomfort. Can we ditch these restraints? I'd really like to lay on my side for awhile."

"Brackett can yell at me if he wants to. He already knows I didn't like him putting them on you. Give me a minute, pally."

One of the nurses he didn't know well came in to take Roy's vitals while Johnny was in the process of removing the last one. The two of them had a brief stare down, but she finally just wrote down the numbers and left. Johnny then turned his attention to helping Roy roll over onto his uninjured side, adjusting the sheet and thin blanket once he was more comfortable.

"Better?"

"Yeah. Thanks, Junior."

"You look pretty beat. Nightmares suck all of the rest out of sleep, don't they?"

"That they do."

"Try and grab a nap then, buddy. I'll be right here to try and keep them at bay."