CHAPTER 10

"Don't be such a drama queen Stef." Damon tried to lighten the tense mood. "I didn't leave ok?" Wasn't that enough? Stefan looked down at his feet, his heart aching as he kicked himself for hoping against hope. Damon rubbed his arm and reached over for soap, handing it to him. Stefan began to lather his body slowly but Damon could tell his mind was elsewhere. Damon reached around him to turn the water off once he had rinsed off, brushing against him and exposing his neck as he stretched. The veins in Stefan's eyes protruded and Damon stepped back out of the shower reflexively, soaking the tiles beneath him as he grabbed a towel and tried to dry his clothing quickly. He made no comment about Stefan's hunger for him and tried to act as though it wasn't happening.

"Hungry." Stefan said and Damon looked up at him in annoyance.

"There's a whole deer downstairs. Stop looking at me like that!" He barked and Stefan smiled. He left the room briskly and went to his own, slamming the door and trying to calm down. He picked up a glass of some human blood he had decanted earlier and drank it. Immediately he felt sick and ran, heaving into the sink. For god sake! He gasped, closing his eyes and shaking it off. Why were they so sick? He heard Stefan call to him through his door but he felt too tired to deal with him right now. After a while of refusing to answer Stefan got the message and returned to his room, slamming his door with equal measure. Damon sprawled onto his bed, relieved that he could finally rest. His bed was so comfortable he pondered on the potential of not leaving it again for a few days as he rubbed his stomach. He was a vampire, they didn't get sick and yet here he was. Stefan was sick too but no wonder. How he could keep that animal blood down at all was a mystery. The smell of it made his nose twitch as he had drained the beast. Don't say I never do anything for you Stefan.

He closed his eyes, reeling in the comfort of his blankets and fell asleep curled up. He was roused from a comfortable dream by the sound of retching coming from down the hall. He blinked a few times, annoyed at the intrusion to his rest as he tried to figure out where he was. He lifted his head and realised he was in his room. He flopped his head back down on the pillow and sighed relaxed. Stefan retched again and it made his ears burn. It sounded like a bad one. He wasn't going to be able to sleep with that going on. He rolled over onto his side begrudgingly and sat up, rubbing his eyes. He needed a splash of water on his face. He got up and walked into his bathroom and turned on the sink, splashing cold water onto himself.

"Damon!" He heard Stefan call out frantically and he dashed out of his room and towards Stefan's voice. He found him lying on the floor with blood everywhere. Stefan reached out for him and Damon lifted him up, smelling immediately that the blood was not Stefan's but the deer's. He had been trying to feed. Stefan groaned in his arms as he carried him to his room and lay him down on the bed.

"I can't keep it down. I feel so sick!" He said and Damon stroked his forehead worriedly, feeling how cold his forehead was.

"You need to sleep brother, you will feel better." Damon cooed and Stefan nodded grimacing. Stefan grabbed his hand and held it to his chest tightly.

"Stay with me." Stefan implored him and Damon clenched his jaw for a moment considering whether it was wise. They still hadn't talked about everything. Stefan seemed to read his thoughts and sighed frowning.

"I won't touch you I promise." Stefan whispered, looking defeated and Damon felt that squeeze in his chest again. He drew the blankets back and slid in next to him, leaving some space between them. Stefan gave a clipped laugh as Damon made sure not to touch him on his side and Damon turned on his side towards him.

"I don't have the plague Damon." It wasn't a comment made in jest, it was from hurt and Damon knew it. They lay in silence, Damon pretending to be asleep as Stefan groaned occasionally, holding his stomach. Damon opened his eyes to peek at him and caught a tear roll down his face as he held himself to his side of the bed. It looked like an effort for him to do so. Damon exhaled through his nose and rolled onto his back feeling guilty. Why did he feel guilty?

"Did it really mean nothing to you? Everything we did…every kiss…" Stefan whispered in full knowledge that Damon was awake and Damon frowned. He didn't know what to say. He knew Stefan wouldn't let it go. Maybe he should have left after he gave him the blood.

"Stefan I'm too tired for this." He grumbled and Stefan rolled on his side and touched his arm. Damon's skin tingled at the contact and he looked down at Stefan's hand. They hadn't shared blood for a whole day, why could he still be so affected? Stefan also seemed surprised by the sensation and they looked up at each other. Stefan held his gaze for a long minute before Damon could feel his fangs fill his mouth and veins protrude. Stefan huffed and did the same. Damon leaned closer, unable to move away from Stefan's throat. Stefan leaned towards him and tilted his head. The smell of Stefan's blood called to him and he closed his eyes and opened his mouth to bite when Stefan's cell phone beeped. He snapped back to attention just before he sank his teeth in and pulled back embarrassed as Stefan growled at the phone and threw it against the wall. Damon moved out of the bed and stood up, needing air.

"Get some sleep brother." He commanded and marched back to his own room.

He lay there unable to get back to his comfy spot and sleep. The smell of Stefan's skin lingered in his memory and along with it, came the memory of all of their joining. He groaned, pulling a pillow over his head. He couldn't deny that it had been the best and most intense sex of his life. He threw the pillow at the wall in frustration and lifted his glass of blood again. He was hungry and still depleted but even the smell of this fresh blood made him want to heave. He didn't get it. He sipped slowly, letting his stomach adjust. He managed to keep it down this time thankfully but it tasted bitter on his tongue. Stefan's blood would taste good, it would still be sweet like oranges. He lay back fantasizing about the texture of it, thick and warm and Stefan-y. His stomach rumbled and he hummed in memory of it, sliding his hand down over his stomach as he did. He breathed in deeply as he imagined biting into Stefan's skin and sucking a mouthful. He shivered as he brushed his manhood and took it in hand. He stroked himself lazily as he closed his eyes. Touching himself was nothing in comparison to Stefan touching him but it would have to do. He made a small gasp as he climaxed but it was slightly disappointing. He fell asleep regardless.

Damon awoke to the pleasant sensation of someone kissing his neck. He sighed and gave a moan of appreciation as he enjoyed the feeling of soft lips grazing over his skin.

"Damon…" Stefan whispered seductively in his ear. He opened his eyes abruptly and pushed Stefan away.

"What are you doing?" Damon said in shock.

"All I can think about is you." Stefan explained, his eyes mentally undressing Damon's semi-clothed body. Damon swallowed nervously and licked his lips.

"We're not trapped anymore Stefan. This has to stop." Damon said weakly as Stefan's stare became hungry and heated. Stefan leaned in and brushed his cheek with his lips. Damon tensed and closed his eyes.

"I still love you." Stefan whispered into his ear and kissed his jaw down onto his neck. Damon's breathing shot up as he leaned into Stefan's touch. Stefan's neck was so near, he could hear the blood trickling through his veins. Stefan kissed back up to his mouth and he volunteered his mouth for the kiss. Stefan's lips were so familiar now and kissing him felt natural, as natural as breathing. Stefan bit his lip playfully and pulled back to look at his face.

"It's still the blood Stefan. We'll feel different in a day or two." Damon brought his thumb up to stroke Stefan's lip as he spoke.

"I want you." Stefan breathed, kissing his thumb and Damon shook his head.

"No. You've had me Stefan. We need to move on." Stefan closed his eyes, fighting his desire and Damon pulled back from him, lying back down. "Sleep brother. Everything will be clearer tomorrow." Damon closed his eyes and turned on his side away from him. After a moment Stefan returned to his own bed and let him sleep, clutching the blankets up to his neck as he tried to relax.

A few days passed and they were both still sick. Damon felt horrendous as he hunted a few hikers. It was strange to feel so hungry and yet nauseated once he finally did eat. He felt stronger and faster again but his stomach complained constantly, enough to make him increasingly irritable. Stefan was faring worse, especially now that he knew that Zack was no longer with them. He had had a fit when Damon had told him about that and it had just made him crazed with nausea all the more. He was struggling to keep anything down at all and so spent most of his time in the library trying to figure out why they were so ill. Stefan seemed obsessed with his research and Damon was under no illusions why. They were both still in heat around each other and had had a few close calls in the evenings when they were both trying to sleep. He had lost count of the number of times he had almost given in and went in to Stefan's room. Last night he had given up and headed into the corridor only to bump right into Stefan. They had looked at each other, knowing why they were there and they had kissed passionately again. Damon had him up against the wall and half naked before he had realised and pulled himself away and locked his room. It was too intense.

Even Elena's presence didn't seem to dissipate the tension. She had turned up unannounced and worried at Stefan's continuing absence at school and lack of communication. Thankfully they both looked as ill as they felt when she arrived and she didn't question that they had the flu. It made seeming human so much easier actually. Damon hadn't missed the lack of interest other than friendliness that emitted from Stefan towards her. She noticed it too and had left a little perturbed by it. He had tried to put it out of his mind. When he returned back to the boarding house, carrying a few rabbits for Stefan, he noticed the strange atmosphere as soon as he walked in.

"Stefan?" He called out, feeling anxious at the silence. There was something almost palpable in the air in the room and Damon set the rabbits on the table as he noticed a book lying open on the floor. He knelt down curiously and picked it up. It looked like an entry of a journal, but it wasn't one of Stefan's. He sat down and tried to read the hand writing.

No one could explain it but they all wanted to study us. Everyone wanted to know what was so different about our blood now…

Stefan entered the lounge and stopped when he saw Damon reading. Damon looked up at him.

"What is this?" Damon raised his eyebrows and frowned when he saw Stefan squirm a little.

"I know what's wrong with us." Stefan mumbled. Damon put the book down and gave him his full attention. Stefan fidgeted with his hands and took a deep breath. Damon chuckled nervously.

"It can't be that bad!" He joked and Stefan looked at him seriously.

"It's not. Well, I don't think it is but you might." Stefan said cryptically.

"Enough with the suspense Stefan." Damon sat forward and Stefan took another deep breath.

"We've mated." He said simply, letting the comment hang in the air as Damon blinked at him in silence. Damon opened his mouth to speak but closed it again, then he broke into a laugh and shook his head.

"Ok Stef!" He got up and lifted the rabbits from the table, walking towards the kitchen. Stefan frowned at his laughter and followed him silently. "You had me going for a minute. Did you read that in your little notebook there?" Damon turned his head to ask as he slit the rabbit's throat and held it over a cup.

"It's true. I had a friend years ago who it happened too. That's her journal you were reading. She described the same sickness we're experiencing." Damon snorted and laughed again as he squeezed the last drop out and turned around handing it to Stefan. Stefan stared at it, veins appearing from hunger. Damon held it out commandingly and Stefan took it from him.

"I can't drink it. It'll make me worse."

"You need to eat. We have to clear our systems out with fresh blood, that's all that's happening here." Damon said objectively.

"It'll make me sick Damon and now I know why." Stefan claimed and Damon sighed exasperated as he rolled his eyes. "If you are my mate, I have to drink your blood too or I can't survive."

"That is the most ridiculous crap I've heard for ages Stefan! Mated? Seriously? We're not bunnies!" Damon grew irritable.

"How else do you explain this?" Stefan shot back, hurt by his continued ridicule. Damon was speechless again as he put his hands on his hips.

"It'll pass." He finally said.

"There's one way to find out if this is true. Let me drink from you." Stefan offered and Damon chuckled, moving back from him and putting his hands up.

"We've had enough of that!"

"So turn the switch off. You won't feel anything and if you're right I will still be sick. If I'm right, I will be able to drink this afterwards and not vomit." Stefan pressed and he could see the logic of it starting to crumble Damon's resistance.

"If I don't feed Damon, I'm going to start drying out. I can barely get up the stairs today I am so weak." Stefan added to demonstrate just how serious this problem was and Damon chewed his bottom lip.

"Fine, but nothing else brother. One bite." Damon commanded and Stefan relaxed instantly, relieved. His whole body had been wound so tight with fear that Damon would explode. He moved towards him, sitting the cup down on the counter and tried to lean in towards Damon's neck. Damon stopped him with his hand and a look of warning before extending his wrist instead. Stefan grumbled at not being able to embrace him but this was the first time Damon had let him this close since last night, so he had to take what he could get. He held Damon's elbow and bit into his wrist, letting his eyes close as he pulled in a mouthful. Damon still tasted like he remembered and he moaned as he swallowed. His body warmed as though someone was pouring hot water down his back and he sighed peacefully as Damon tensed, keeping his switch off. After a few more mouthfuls Damon tensed again and pulled his wrist away. Stefan felt so overwhelmed he had to sit down and breathe for a minute as he licked his lips.

"Well?" Damon asked and Stefan smiled as though he was stoned. He lifted the cup of bunny and took a sniff. The scent wasn't quite so bad as it had been but was still nothing in comparison to Damon as he eyed the wound healing on his wrist. He sipped the blood slowly, fearful of retching as Damon watched him like a hawk eagerly. He finished the cup and sat it down and waited.

"How do you feel?" Damon ventured and he looked up at him in wonder.

"I feel fine." Stefan breathed and stroked over his stomach in gratitude. He had been miserable for days with the pain and sickness and now it felt normal. He looked back up at Damon again and Damon clenched his jaw.

"You need to drink from me." Stefan said and Damon huffed. "You're still sick."

"This is nonsense Stefan." Damon grumbled. "Vampires don't mate. If they did we'd know about it because it would have happened with Katherine." Stefan frowned at the mention of her name.

"It's rare. Marcela had only ever met one other couple it had happened to."

"We are not a couple!"

"The journal, it was hers. I took it when she died." Stefan ignored Damon's outburst, gritting his teeth.

"How did she die?" Damon wasn't sure why he was interested. Stefan paled a little and looked down at his hands.

"Her mate died and she starved." Stefan looked at him pointedly. Damon let out a gust of air and growled.

"Enough of this! I'm your brother, not your mate Stefan. I don't want to be your mate!" Damon swiped the empty cup off the table and smashed it against the wall as Stefan jumped.

"You did this to me!" Damon paced the kitchen as Stefan sat calmly watching.

"You wanted me too." Stefan pointed out but it made Damon angrier as he punched a wall and grimaced as his stomach rolled. He hung his head and tried to breathe through it. Stefan was next to him in a heartbeat and he flinched. Stefan held his wrist out to him and Damon laughed.

"You'd love that wouldn't you? You've been trying to get me back into bed for days."

"If you don't want my blood then fine! But I'm not going to starve because you are an idiot!" Stefan growled and bit into his neck. Damon yelped in surprise but couldn't fight back as he gasped, feeling his stomach protest. Stefan moved into him and held him as he took another mouthful before pulling back and looking at him. Damon scowled and grimaced in discomfort. It was hard having Stefan so close to him.

"The more you fight this, the sicker you're going to get. Just accept it. Let yourself be happy for once." Stefan advised. "I love you." He added and Damon grunted unhappily. "You said you loved me too."

"I was half starved and horny!" Damon grumbled. Stefan leaned in and licked the blood from his neck and Damon groaned.

"I could fix you." Stefan mumbled, running his nose against Damon's cheek.

"What the hell do we do now?" Damon whined, bending over to take a deep breath as he panicked.

"Is it really so horrible to you to be with me?" Stefan's voice was low and deep. The other vampires he had heard about had wanted to be together, why didn't Damon feel like he did? Maybe this was all a coincidence.

"You're my brother Stefan. What part of your brain has rotted all of a sudden? You hate me, you've always hated me and now I'm supposed to believe that some airy-fairy blood bond has made you my mate?" Damon said pushing Stefan gently away from him.

"I've never hated you, even when you tortured me through the years. I've always hoped that some day you would let me in again. When we were human I loved you more than anyone in the world." Stefan said tightly and Damon looked up at him. "That's how I feel again." Damon huffed. "I'm yours now. I can feel the difference in my body."

They didn't speak for a minute as Damon sat down, staring blankly at the ground.

"Try it out. Let's see how well you can keep blood down without me." Stefan was growing impatient and hurt and he left the room as Damon put his head in his hands. He was fucked.