Hey, everyone! So how long has it been? I'm not sure- way too long, anyway. And I'm really sorry I keep promising to get my ass to work and get you guys a quick update and then all of a sudden it's three months later and I STILL haven't given you anything. It's just been some tough months, to be honest. It's hard, writing a love story when your parents are getting a divorce.
Anyhow, now is NOT a time to mope around!
Enjoy this chapter, it's from Sakura's POV. The next one will be from Naruto's!
Sakura stepped out of the shadows onto the sunny sidewalk, careful not to trip on her heels. She shook her hair back and shifted her bag on her shoulder, trying to relieve some of its weight. Finally leaving the comfortable environment of her home and exploring the outside world–well, it'd take some getting used to after an entire summer of lying around cryi– er, sleeping.
She sighed. The first day of school always seemed so surreal, and this year even more so than the last. Everything had simply changed in so many ways. Well, actually, it wasn't so much the student's actions, per se, that had changed, or the fact that people still refused to look her in the eye or converse with her… Rather, it was the way they avoided her gaze and ignored her that was different.
In retrospect it had been a pure–if not an irrational–dislike and aversion that had led people to act the way they did. Today, though, it looked as though shock was the cause of their actions. She'd seen tons of students stare at her, and then suddenly tear their eyes away from her no sooner than she had caught them in the act. And even more peculiar was how nobody had bumped into her. All day! It actually seemed as though they would jump aside as soon as she came into view, something that Sakura didn't particularly mind, actually. After all, wasn't anything and everything better than people tossing her aside as if she were an empty bag of crisps?
As if she was something worthless, disposable, and insignificant.
Part of the reason for the huge "change" was probably due to Sakura's official entrance to junior-dom, something that automatically propelled her to the higher social hierarchy–she was now older than half of the entire student body.
Another reason, Sakura supposed, was the dramatic self-transformation she had undergone. From the glances she was granted from her own reflection in a classroom door or window, Sakura realized she looked quite different from before the summer vacation. From the black leather jacket, dark skinny jeans and black high heeled boots to the deep red painted lips, wide eyes rimmed with dark mascara, and sour expression, she had certainly become someone entirely new. It was most likely the formidable expression that did the trick. Then again, it might have been odd to find a girl that had expressed such a vast array of emotion: she had once been a miserable, timid creature, and then a girl with an unwaveringly goofy grin, and then someone who had finally become a– well, she didn't like to admit it, but now the resemblance between her and a stereotypical delinquent was truly undeniable.
And even though, Sakura contemplated, that such a figure of society was not in any way remotely like her, she felt that this outer appearance was best-suited–for the moment, at least. She needed to reestablish her life, get it back on track. She needed to regain a sense of trust she'd always succeeded in keeping, even despite everything that had happened. She needed people who could treat her equally as they did to others.
And what she needed the most was a sense of normalcy again, at least before a certain someone–a sudden wave of pain hit her in the chest–messed everything up.
That was what she needed, yes. But strangely enough, what she wanted was something else entirely.
She wanted him. Just him. (Again, an annoying twinge of sorrow churned, this time in her stomach.)
Frankly, that was all she wanted.
Was it stupid? Yes.
Ignorant? Yes.
Naive? Probably, yes.
But who could blame her? Through all the hurt, all the shame, and all the anger, she was still a teenage girl in love, a girl in love with an idiot who didn't deserve her. In the least.
But there was nothing she could do about it.
Sakura rounded a corner and her house came into view, the yellow stones almost blinding in the afternoon sunlight. With the sun so bright, she moved to cover her eyes, yet something caught her attention.
A dark green mountain bike that most certainly did not belong to her mother was parked on her driveway, leaning against a trash can.
Sakura was still trying to pull her mind away from her earlier ponderings when a lofty voice made her look up.
''Sakura!'' Her mom's head peered down from the high porch, the collar of her light blue blouse just visible above the flower-less wisteria growing along the stone ridge.
''Hey, Mom,'' Sakura greeted, her voice still sounding a little wary.
''Psst, come on up,'' the redhead hissed now, her mouth stretched into a wide grin. In response to her mother's odd behavior, Sakura cautiously slowed her steps as she neared the house. ''There's a young man waiting for you in the living room.''
Sakura arched an eyebrow, trying to force the sudden wave op hope that washed over her down. ''Huh? Who is it?''
''I don't know, but he's quite good looking,'' her mom said with a suggestive wink. Sakura's face must have given away the fact that she wanted to just turn around and run away, because the redhead added, ''If you don't go to him now, I'll have to go sit with him myself.''
Sakura's jaw dropped. ''Mom, gross!'' She took a step towards the door.
''I meant showing him embarrassing baby pictures of you, but whatever gets you inside the house is fine with me,'' Lily Haruno snorted. ''I'll bring you guys some drinks later on.''
''Please don't,'' the girl replied, unable to keep a smile from creeping up on her face. She entered, closing the door behind her.
As Sakura took off her coat and hung it from the hat stand in the hall, she took the time to wonder who was waiting for her. A boy, her mom had said. A good looking boy.
Which boy did she know that could have something so important to tell her that he'd come to her house and even offer to stay and wait for her?
Her mind drifted off to a certain blond for what must have been the thousandth time that hour, but she momentarily distracted herself by hastily glancing at her garden (She tried to convince herself that the sick feeling in her stomach was because of seeing all her plants that she had spent months prettying up withering away into obscurity, until the garden had become something of a little graveyard. She knew better, really.).
So when she entered the living room and her eyes darted over to the figure sitting on the couch, she tried not to show the disappointment she felt from not seeing Naruto's blue eyes look back at her (What was wrongwith her? He'd hurt her, dammit!), but Sasuke Uchiha's dark ones. The disappointment was quickly replaced by puzzlement though.
''Sasuke?''
''Hi,'' he greeted awkwardly, expression stoic.
''Hi,'' Sakura greeted back. She cleared her throat, ''I don't want to be rude or anything, but, er... Why are you here?'' Because honestly, why would she try being nice to a person who had ignored her and made fun of her for her entire life? And why hadn't she cared that he'd been such an ass to her for so long until recently?
Oh, right.
The not-being-in-love-with-him-anymore thing.
''Well,'' the object of her confusion started, ''I heard about you and Naruto...''
Sakura flinched visibly at this, but she quickly composed herself. ''Everyone did,'' she stated, hating how bitter her voice sounded.
''Yeah, but I just wanted to tell you why he acted like such a–''
''Complete asshole?''
''Right,'' he said, a small smirk appearing on his face. Or was it a smile? It didn't matter either way, because it had already disappeared. ''What I wanted to say is that he didn't mean to be. I mean–he meant to, but only in the beginning. He wanted to quit about a week after Ino told him to, you know, do it. But she and I convinced him to go on.''
Sakura took a deep breath to stop herself from yelling at him. ''What was 'it'?'' left her lips instead, ''What was he–were you trying to do?''
Sasuke looked away from her, at some spot on the wall. ''I don't even remember. It was probably stupid.'' He got up and put on the jacket lying on the arm of the couch. ''I think he's in love with you.''
Sakura's eyes doubled in size. ''W-what- wait, what?''
''He's in love with you,'' the boy repeated.
''I don't know if it escaped your attention,'' Sakura said slowly, as if trying not to lunge herself at him, ''but he rejected me.''
''I think he couldn't tell you. I think he's been in love with you all this time, but that he somehow–I don't know, suppresses everything. Just woke up one day and wanted to stop loving you. He's an idiot, but he's not a bad person, you know?'' Sasuke looked down. ''Or maybe I'm the idiot. I mean, I'm his best friend, and I only figured this out yesterday. I'm supposed to be a genius, too.''
Sakura's fists clenched and unclenched on both sides of her jeans. ''Stop lying,'' she hissed as tears began to sting in her eyes once more.
What was wrong with her? Lately she was bursting out crying about ten times a day. If she kept these emotional theatrics up, people would think she was pregnant or something!
But even so, everyone had seemed desperate to hurt her one way or another. She was finally getting over Naruto, though somewhat questionable. And here was Sasuke, trying to get her hopes up once again. And for what? So his stupidfuckingjerkidiotasshole best friend could break her heart once again?
''No, I'm not. I swear I'm telling the truth,'' Sasuke said, uncharacteristically desperate.
''Why do you fucking care so much now then, huh? After you've ignored me and treated me like dirt for all my life, why now? Don't lie to me!''
Sasuke stood frozen after that, but Sakura wasn't naive enough to think he might be pondering over her words. He was probably only thinking about how the girl standing before him had transformed from the quiet, shy, decent girl she'd been into the swearing, dark-clothed juvenile delinquent she was right now, with lips pressed into a tight line, eyes narrowed and nostrils flared.
''I'm not lying,'' he tried again. ''You're too angry right now. Think about all this later.''
''Fuck you,'' Sakura spat. The boy gave her one last wide-eyed look before putting on his jacket, shaking his head and fleeing the house. ''Don't you dare act as if Naruto and you are the victims here,'' she called after him, taking a step into the doorway so she could look at his back as he opened the front door. ''You're the ones breaking people for fun! You're the ones–'' but the door slammed shut and her shoulders slumped.
It was when she was gulping back whatever amount of sobs forced their way out of her throat that she noticed her mother standing in the kitchen who was holding a serving tray with a teapot and cups.
Sakura stood there, blinking up at the woman and expecting her to flee the house again at any second. So when she put the tray down on a kitchen dresser and walked into the hallway, Sakura squeaked and the tears left her eyes. ''No, mom, please–Don't–''
But Lily hadn't meant to leave. She jumped over to her daughter and pulled her into a suffocating bear hug. ''Oh, honey. Sweet, sweet, sweet–No, don't cry. Shhh.''
It was a tiny bit embarrassing, hearing her mother talk to her as if she were a toddler. But to be honest, Sakura couldn't give a crap. ''Mom!'' she bawled.
''Come on, let's sit down for a while,'' her mom shushed her, ushering her to the couch.
Sakura sat down next to her mother, putting her head in the woman's lap. She closed her eyes and cried and cried until she was sure every last bit of moisture had left her body. She wasn't sure what she cried for, exactly. Whether it was Naruto, or Sasuke, or their prank, or the fact that her mother was with her again. That she was really with her. And that finally there was somebody to hold her as she cried.
''I'm so tired,'' she whispered, her swollen eyes fluttering shut.
''What happened, honey? Why was that boy here? Did he do something to you?''
''He didn't rape me or anything."
''Then what did he do?'' Lily asked again, more insistently this time.
The teenage girl put her hands over her face and wiped away every last tear from her eyes. She didn't move to sit up from her mother's lap, for fear that as soon as she had broken contact with her mother, she'd go away again.
She felt Lily move–probably to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear–and heard the muffled sound of a car passing in the distance. Dully eying the pale shadow of the furniture on the wooden floor, Sakura sucked in a breath and exhaled.
In a hushed voice, she began to tell the story.
A LOT of thanks to Twinkletoast, who saved this chapter and gave me some AMAZING ideas for the following chapters!
If you want to, please review. :)
~Springflake