HELLO! I'M BACK AGAIN! DISCLAAAAIMEERS! Deidara, it's your turn again. DON'T MESS UP THIS TIME.
Deidara: I'm still mad at you, un.
DO THE DISCLAIMERS OR I SHALL UNLEASH THE TOBI!
Deidara: You wouldn't.
I gave him about 200 dollars worth of candy.
Deidara: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! AHHHHH! UN! OMGWTFBBQ?
*slaps Deidara*Not if you do the disclaimers.
Deidara: But I don't want to, un.
*brings in a cage with Tobi in it who is bouncing around like a molecule*
Tobi: HI, DEIDARA-SENPAI! TOBI HAD CANDY! CAN DEIDARA-SENPAI PLAY HOUSE WITH TOBI? TOBI WANTS TO PLAY HOUSE BECAUSE TOBI'S A GOOD BOY!
Deidara: You're evil.
Yes, I know. My family has told me that for years. I even said so.
Deidara: I have no choice, do I? Un.
Nope. *smiles and does an eye smile like Kakashi* Now do the disclaimers.
Deidara *sigh* Jinso does not own Naruto, Naruto Shippuden, or any characters affiliated with them. He does own Aaron, May, Cryptus, Rich, the Stranger, Apple-chan, Disclaimer-san, Evil Tobi *major shiver*, the elves, and Illyon. Enjoy the chapter.
*while Deidara is talking, lifts up cage door* *when Deidara is finished* TOBI, ATTACK!
Tobi: DEIDARA-SENPAI!
Deidara: *points finger accusingly* YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T! *gets hyper-glomped by Tobi*
I'm evil. Of course I did. I'm also insane, and a trickster.
Deidara: I HATE YOU!
You'll love me by the end of the chapter. Enjoy it, peoples!
Rule 27: All good things must be punished. (one of my dad and I's favorite sayings)
Normal POV
Time skip: One week
When Aaron woke up, he was for some reason in the Akatsuki base. He could faintly remember a conversation happening before he fell asleep.
Flaaaaashbaaaack~
"So why would you want to keep him with you?" Anko asked the Akatsuki outside his bedroom door..
"We are a group of S-Ranked shinobi. He'd be much safer with us than here, where people could try to assassinate him while he slept.' Pein told her.
"Are you sure?" She pressed.
"Abso-fuckin'-lutely, bitch!" Hidan said. Kakuzu whacked him upside the head. Anko sighed.
"Fine." She conceded.
"But he comes back in twelve days or else." Anko then added.
"Deal." Pein agreed. Before he could hear anything else, darkness started to consume his vision. The last thing his tired mind could comprehend was someone picking him up.
Ooooooveeer~
Aaron sat up with a long yawn. His chest felt heavier than normal, and his voice sounded higher pitched, but he didn't care. He had gotten the greatest sleep of his life, and his energy was completely renewed. So he got out of the room he had stayed in with the Akatsuki before and walked to the kitchen. Konoha had come out with a kind of energy drink after Aaron had won, and named it Sunlight, after him. A few times throughout the week, he had woken up and had a little bit of the drink each time. Aaron had quickly grown accustomed to its taste, and so the Akatsuki had bought 4 12-packs of it for him. In the kitchen he saw Hidan drinking a can of his energy drink.
"Hey, mofo," Hidan looked at him.
"Who said you could drink my Sunlight?" Aaron asked sternly.
"Um...Who the fuck are you, bitch?" Hidan asked.
"I'm not a bitch, you jackass, and you know who I am!" He replied angrily.
"You don't get to fuckin' cuss at me, you dipshit whore!" Hidan yelled back.
"I'M NOT A FUCKIN' WHORE!" Aaron shouted at him, with his head growing about 10x bigger. It was his version of Iruka's "Mega Head" jutsu.
"Pein, there's a hot bitch we don't know in the goddamn base! GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!" Hidan yelled in the direction of a door. Pein walked into the room.
"Hidan, if you shout at me again, you're gonna—" Pein tried to threaten, but could only keep staring at Aaron.
"What?" Aaron asked. Pein then moved forward, grabbed Aaron by the throat, and slammed him against a wall.
"Who are you and what are you doing here?" Pein asked with a growl.
"You know who I am! I saved the world, and your collective asses!" Aaron yelled back, shoving Pein off of him.
"For a normal girl, you shouldn't be able to push me away..." Pein mused.
"I'M NOT A FUCKING GIRL! If you all are pranking me, I'm gonna burn the body you're currently using, Nagato!" Aaron threatened him.
"How do you know that?" Pein questioned.
"FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME, YOU ALL NOW WHO I AM, AND HOW I KNOW THAT!" Aaron yelled at the top of his lungs. May and Rich came running in the room.
"Who's she?" Rich asked, pointing to Aaron.
"ARE YOU GUYS PRANKING ME TOO?" Aaron yelled again.
"Calm down. Who are you?" May asked.
"It's me! You guys know who I am! We've been best friends since Kindergarten!" He told them.
"How do you know what Kindergarten is?" Rich questioned.
"Guys! It's me, Aaron! Of course I know what Kindergarten is!"
"How do you know who he is?" They asked, interested.
"I'm him! I saved the world with you guys' help!" He said.
"Prove it, bitch." Hidan said, folding his arms. Aaron held out his hand in the air. It changed into a fiery claw. When he turned it back, they were all gawking.
"Aaron...That's really you?" Rich asked slowly.
"Of course it's me! That's what I've been trying to tell you for the last ten minutes!" He said loudly. Then he looked at them questioningly.
"Why would you think it wasn't?" Aaron asked. Rich just pointed a finger at his torso. Aaron looked down slowly, and then grimaced in horror. His chest was a tiny bit over 25 centimeters bigger than normal. It made sense now. His voice was higher, and his chest felt heavier. A loud
"WHAT THE FUCK?" rang out throughout the base. Aaron was somehow...a girl. He placed his hands up in his jet black (and now longer) hair.
"There's no way this is possible..." Aaron said in a scared voice. Pein handed him a mirror. Aaron held it up to his face. Every single one of his facial features seemed more feminine than before; his eyelashes a little bit longer, his chin more curved than blocky, his hair even having a feminine look. Then he decided to go into the bathroom to see what his entire body looked like. There was a full body mirror in every bathroom so the members could look at their outfits and such. Konan, of course, had been the one to make this happen. Aaron looked over his new body for a few minutes. He was wearing one of his regular black tees, though his chest stood out from everything else, and he made himself out to be a D-cup. He was also wearing regular dark blue shorts. Every single curve on his body stood out now, and he was pretty sure that if he was looking at himself from another guy's point of view, he would have started drooling. It felt weird having breasts and a vagina, since he had been a guy before. They might've slowed him down, had he been a regular shinobi. But being one of the few definitions of stamina and speed, he wasn't hindered in the slightest, down to even the tiniest molecule. When he got back to the kitchen, every member was standing in the room, with the eight people—Sasori, Deidara, Kisame, Itachi, Konan, Tobi, Zetsu, and Kakuzu— who didn't know it was Aaron looking at him strangely.
"Who's the girl?" Sasori asked.
"And do you think she'll wanna go out with me? (un)" Kisame and Deidara asked in unison.
"Tobi thinks Girl-chan looks pretty!" The masked man said, clapping his hands and jumping up and down. Truthfully, he was just as confused as the others, but didn't want to intimidate the girl just yet. Kisame and Deidara both stared angrily at each other.
"I wanna ask her out!" Kisame shouted.
"No, I do! Un!" Deidara yelled back.
"I do!"
"I do!"
"I DO!"
"I DO!"
"I DO!"
"I DO!" Pein growled and performed the Mega Head Jutsu.
"SHUT UP!" He yelled, blowing their hair back as gusts of wind hit their faces.
"I know you're all wondering who this girl is, and why she's here." Pein began.
"This is going to shock you, but this girl is Aaron." He told them. They all stared disbelievingly. Then Kisame, Deidara, Konan, and Tobi burst into laughter.
"That's a good one, Leader!" Deidara said, wiping tears from his eyes. Aaron just held out a hand emotionlessly, and grew a fiery claw. They stopped dead in their tracks.
"How is that possible?" Konan asked with wide eyes and a zoned out stare.
"Apparently, someone thought it would be good if I got genderbended." Aaron said while scowling at the sky. (he explained genderbending to them while surfing fanfics here a bunch of chapters back)
Author: Hey man, don't look at me. I didn't do this one. I'm not a pervert. Well, then again, everyone's a pervert. Some people just know how to hide it.
He just turned towards the person who is reading this story right now.
"If any of you perverts out there draw me in an explicit and sexual way, your lives will become hell." Aaron threatened. Everyone stared at him like he had grown a second head.
"Are you sure we should be breaking the fourth wall?" May asked him.
"The readers need to know that piece of information." He simply answered. No one decided to ask what she meant. Suddenly, Kisame and Deidara both started vomiting.
"Ewwww." Aaron said. Everyone agreed by taking a large step away from the pile of bile.
"Why'd you puke?" Rich asked.
"I'm guessing they both, being the perverts they are, had been thinking about doing some very inappropriate things with Aaron before they learned who he was." Konan speculated. As if on cue, every male (including Aaron) bent over and puked, except for Pein (who still had bent over), seeing as how he was a corpse and therefore void of any stomach acid. When all the guys recovered, May brought up an interesting point.
"You know, now that you're a girl, if you keep your regular name, people will think you're crazy." She pointed out.
"Yeah, that is true..." Rich agreed.
"So I need a girl name?" Aaron asked them. May nodded. For some reason, Tobi was sniffing Aaron's hair.
"RAPE!" Aaron screamed. He grabbed Tobi's head and threw him into the wall, letting pieces of it fall off.
"Deidara-senpai, what's rape?" Tobi asked while sitting on top of a pile of rubble. Deidara tensed up.
"Um...You'll learn when you're older, un." He said, casually playing it off. A couple of people started glaring at Aaron.
"DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IT'LL COST TO FIX THAT WALL?" Kakuzu shouted. Aaron shrugged sheepishly.
"Sorry. I just got turned into a girl, my mind is on the fritz, and seeing as how you guys are criminals and what Deidara and Kisame were thinking of earlier, I don't know if one of you guys is gonna jump me or not." He said nervously. They nodded in understanding. It was hard being around ten male criminals and being a girl. Then he turned to Tobi.
"Tobi, why were you sniffing my hair?" He asked the childish shinobi.
"Tobi thought Aaron-senpai's hair smelled like lilies, and Tobi likes lilies, so he thought it smelled good!" Tobi said happily.
"Oh." *cue sheepish rubbing of head*
"I think Tobi just gave me an idea for your name!" Konan exclaimed. All eyes focused on her.
"What?" Aaron asked.
"Yuriko! (lily child)" She said with a smile. Aaron thought for a moment.
"Yeah, that could work." He said. Aaron smiled. Then he frowned.
"What is it?" Konan asked, thinking he might not like the name.
"I don't know how the hell I'm going to explain this to Anko..." Aaron said. Kisame grew a perverted grin.
"Alright, lesbians!" He said goofily. Somehow, a frying pan appeared in both Konan and Aaron's hands, and they each whacked one side of his head. Konan hit the front, and Aaron whacked the back, sandwiching his face between the two pans of death. Kisame fell to the ground unconscious with a bloody nose, a bruised head, and a black eye. Aaron folded his arms.
"Typical pervert." He said, blowing one of his new bangs out of his face. Itachi grabbed Kisame's leg and dragged him into his room.
"So you're going to be called Yuriko now?" Rich asked.
"I'm not completely sure. I might want to think up some other names first." He said.
"It'll take me a while. I'll be in my room. No one is allowed to bother me. I need a couple of hours to think this through." Aaron added. Not even willing to let anyone interrupt his thought process by answering, he went to his room instantly.
"This is so fucked up..." Pein said, rubbing his temples.
PEIN IS RIGHT! THIS IS SO FUCKED UP! I hope you liked this chapter, because the next might come out tomorrow if you review! Deidara, I told you you would like me by the end of the chapter.
Deidara: *is staring at Aaron's breasts* *drools*
Hey Aaron, can I borrow your frying pan?
Aaron: Sure. *gives frying pan*
Thanks. *hits the back of Deidara's head with frying pan*
Deidara: *starts falling over with goofy expression still on his face* *makes creaking noises as he falls*
TIIIIIMBEEEER!
Deidara: *crashes to the ground*
Aaron: Was he staring at my—
Yes, yes he was.
Aaron: *scowls* He's dead. *grabs Deidara by the leg* Come, Deidara, it's time for a playdate. *drags Deidara off to Tobi's room with a malicious smirk*
Deidara: *realizes what's happening* No, don't! I'm sorry! I WON'T DO IT AGAIN! *begins begging for mercy*
Aaron: Nope, too late. *opens Tobi's door and tosses him in* * closes Tobi's door and holds it closed*
Deidara: *pounds on door* Let me out!
Aaron: *locks Tobi's door* Sorry, but that's the price of perversity.
Tobi: Is Deidara-senpai here for a playdate? YAY!
Deidara: OH GOD, NO! AHHHHHHH!
*screaming and cries of 'TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!' are heard in the background*
Aaron: Thanks for telling me.
No prob. I hate *is spat with venom* perverts. *turns back to you* Thanks for reading, and I'll come out with the next chapter soon.
Until next time,
Ja Ne! *disappears in a cloud of flowers* OKAY, WHO ADDED THE WUSSY EFFECT?
~Jinsokuna E)