CHAPTER 42! WAAIYAA! OH YEAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! Here it is for joo, my loyal fans!
Disclaimer: I hath no reason to claimeth that I ownst Naruto, Naruto Shippuden, or any so characters that might be affiliatedeth with them. So...DISCLAIMETH!
Now then, on with Chapter 42:
Life Becomes a Game for Rich & Aaron!
Normal POV
Chapter...BEGIN!
Konoha Hospital
Tsunade, Hansuke, Kurenai, Arine, and five nurses rushed into the ER, wheeling a hospital bed which carried Anko. She had a long, bloody gash on her neck, and her skin was deathly pale.
"What happened?" Tsunade asked.
"The Ageul kidnapped Anko, trapped Aaron under a pile of boulders, and then made him play their 'game', which meant if he couldn't get out from under the boulders in half a minute, they would slash her throat!" Hansuke explained.
"Who're the Ageul, and why wasn't Aaron able to get out from under the boulders in time?"
"The Ageul are these troll-like people who are the mortal enemies of the elves, and Aaron wasn't able to get out from under the boulders because they cuffed him with some special kind of metal which made him unable to use his powers!" Hansuke told her as they were still rushing. She nodded. They finally got into the ER after yelling at people to "Get the hell out of the way!" in Tsunade's choice of words. The five nurses looked over Anko's wound.
"Oh, this is bad!" One with brown hair said.
"What? What is it?" Hansuke asked hurriedly.
"She's got some kind of poison in her system! We can't even touch it!" She yelled. Hansuke raised his fist and slammed it on a table, crushing it like it was a toothpick.
"DAMN IT!" He shouted.
"Aaron, you gotta get here!"
Ageul Base
The light faded, and all around him were devastated ruins, cracked and broken, crushed and torn. Pillars lay on the ground, cracked in half. Walls were like crumbs on a dinner table.
"That is what you deserve,scum!" Aaron said. He roared once more, and began creating massive explosions and flashes of light out of anger. Then he stopped.
"Anko..." He placed his middle and index fingers on his forehead and disappeared.
Konoha Hospital
They all were waiting for Aaron worriedly. What if he was too angry to focus? Suddenly, he appeared in the middle of the room, making everyone cry out. Then he walked over to Anko and laid a hand on her forehead.
"There's a strong venom in her bloodstream." He turned to them.
"Stay back." He ordered. Anko's forehead glowed where his palm lay.
"Haeille, porsandre worund. Don neote letress herenn blodvell spillestre." He whispered in a gentle voice. The glow brightened. Then it faded away, leaving her forehead looking like it had never been there. Then her skin brightened a little, and the gash closed a centimeter tighter. He kept his hand on her forehead.
"What did you say?" Tsunade asked.
"He said, 'Heal, poisoned wound. Do not let her blood spill.' That was in the ancient language of the gods." Hansuke answered.
"So what did he—"
"As he is the god of healing, he can heal any wound, even a fatal one, so long as the god of the dead permits." Hansuke explained.
"So who is the god of the dead?"
"I am. I permitted it because she's supposed to live."
"How do you know that?"
"I am the god of death, fates, and the moon."
"I thought only Aaron could know the future."
"He does, but in the form of prophecies. I tell him of the fates, and he turns them into prophecies. We're practically brothers and partners in what our godly duties are."
"Ohhhhh." They could see Aaron's lips moving silently, and a glowing mark appeared on Anko's forehead, then went away as fast as it had come.
"What was that?"
"I blessed her." Aaron told them. Suddenly, Rich and May came bursting in the room.
"Tsunade-sama, we weren't able to get Aaron ba—" They stopped when they saw that Aaron was standing right there.
"Aaron? How'd you get here so fast?"
"I killed them." He said with a low pitch in his voice.
"The Ageul?"
"I slaughtered them for hurting her. Soon their race will pay..." Everyone took an instinctive step back from him.
"I'm going into the forest. You may visit me if Hansuke allows it." He told them. Then he added.
"Her system is healing quickly. Do not let anyone touch her no matter what." With that, Aaron disappeared into thin air. They looked and saw that the gash on her neck was already near non-existant.
Konoha Forest
He reappeared in the middle of a dense area. Slowly, he drew a symbol inside a circle on the ground. It looked like a 5, but with a backslash from the end of its tail to the end of the line on top, and two asterisk-like marks inside each open space. He sat down at one end of it and meditated.
"Shrendow mrae hendessr; thrine onshke whradshao garllve mrae lindrofe..." Aaron said softly. A gentle breeze flowed through the forest. If you listened closely, you would have heard a voice translating what he said.
"Show me her; the one who gave me life..." It whispered. A cloud of blue mist came out of him, and went over to the side of the symbol opposite him. It then began taking the form of a woman. When it finished, Aaron's hard eyes softened.
"Mother..." He said. Mikoto smiled at him.
"Alren..."
"I don't know what to do. I've already lost you, my race, my best friend, even though I brought him back, and now I almost lost the one I love. Please help me..." He begged, a tear coming down his face.
"It's alright..." She cooed, trying to soothe her son.
"You have to be strong. Fight for the ones you love. Show that you can beat whatever comes your way." Mikoto told him. He wiped the lone tear off of his face.
"Thank you..." He said.
"Everyone needs guidance at some point in their lives. This is yours..." With that, she faded into nothing. He got up, and erased the symbol. Then he turned to a tree, and punched a massive hole in it. Hansuke appeared right next to him.
"Anko's healthy now. You might wanna come back." He told Aaron. Aaron nodded, and Hansuke disappeared. Then he teleported back to the hospital, sensing Anko's energy flourishing again.
Hospital
Rich, May, Arine, and Tsunade were all sitting in separate chairs, waiting for either Anko to wake up, Hansuke to get back, or for both Aaron and Hansuke to get back. They both appeared in the middle of the room, and Aaron walked over to Anko. He laid a hand on her shoulder. Slowly, she stirred, her eyes opening groggily, and she blinked many times.
"Aaron?..." She asked hoarsely.
"Welcome back to the land of the living." He said gently.
"What happened?..."
"You nearly got killed and he went 1337 on their asses!" Hansuke said with a laugh.
"Wha?..."
"It means he pwned them into last year." Rich explained.
"Did you guys know that 1337 began as an elven term?" Aaron asked.
"Damn..." Rich trailed. Anko slowly sat up in her hospital bed. Aaron leaned in and hugged her tightly, but not too much.
"Why don't we go celebrate the fact that you're alive?" Rich suggested. Aaron cheered.
"Come on." Aaron helped Anko get out of her bed, and they all walked to a bar. When they sat down, someone shouted out,
"Hey look! It's the Snake Bitch! Careful, she'll turn you into a pedo!" Aaron scowled in their direction.
"Why do they have to be so cruel?" Anko asked him in a hushed voice.
"Ooh, look! Her voice is hoarse! I bet he gave her such a deep-throat that she doesn't want to leave him! That's all she's good for!" The person shouted again. Arine, Hansuke, Rich, May, and Anko could feel Aaron's rage growing.
"Everyone but Rich, get out of here." He ordered.
"Aaron..." May warned.
"When I'm done, there won't even need to be someone to clean this place up." He told them.
"Why everyone but me?" Rich asked him. Aaron grinned wolfishly at him.
"I want you to help me pwn some noobs." He answered. Rich's grin matched his.
"Let's do it." They both cracked their knuckles. The others got Anko and got out of the bar.
"You two're gonna take us all on? You're dumber than I thought!" The person yelled back. Every patron who was a dumbass got out of their seats and laughed. Suddenly, they all froze. Aaron waved a hand in front of their faces.
"What's going on?" He asked. Suddenly, like in a Star Trek movie (yes, I'm a Trekkie), a beam of light appeared, and out of it stepped a man with spiky silver hair. He looked to be about 21, and his blue-green eyes had a mischievous glint in them.
"Who're you?" Rich asked, pointing at the man.
"Me? I'm Jinsokuna wa mada yasashii, the author, and the man who controls your entire existence!" He said enthusiastically.
"You control my existence?" Aaron asked.
"Sure as hell! I control your every movement via an HP Windows Vista laptop!" Jinsokuna made an eye-smile.
"So why are you here?" Rich asked.
"Well," Jinsokuna began.
"I've noticed that I've given both Aaron and May skills and things that make them 1337, but you don't have any. So, I'm adding to Aaron's, but I'm also giving you some!"
"Some what?"
"Pro skills!" Jinsokuna said with a smile.
"Like what?"
"Simple. You guys have heard of an hacking and cheat codes, right?" They both nodded.
"Well, think of something like...you both can imagine cheat codes for life, and use them to their full potential! All you have to do is think of a five-digit cheat code, such as 'L-R-A-A-B', and shout it like a jutsu. You also have to think of what you want it to be used for. Anyways, once you have used the cheat code, you can use it again and again. Also, I've already got some for you set up in a cheats list. To open the cheats list, you have to shout 'Pause!', and time will stop like in a game. Then you select the cheat codes you guys and I have created that you wish to use, and use them/it."
"Why don't you practice it on these uber noobs?" Jinsokuna suggested.
"So we just shout 'Pause!', and time stops? Then we select our cheats, right?" Rich asked.
"I'll even give you a quest to start you off with something awesome! Just pause life, and select 'Enable Fists of Fury'!" He said.
"Ok!" Rich said happily.
"Good. The reward you'll get will be quite worth it!" Jinso said with that mischievous glint in his eye again. With that, he stepped off to the side.
"Won't they notice you?" Rich asked.
"Nah. I'm the author, so I control whatever happens." Jinso said with a bored look.
"NOW LET THE GAMES BEGIN!" A trumpet flourish sounded. Suddenly, the people snapped back to life.
"You're a dumbass if you think you can take us!" The guy sneered.
"What you don't know is..." Rich smirked.
"What we can do..." Aaron continued.
"Will make you PAUSE!" The patrons froze in place. A list of cheats appeared in front of them. Aaron found the one that said "Enable Fists of Fury". He tapped it, and the screen disappeared. Rich then looked confused.
"Hey, Jinso? How do we unpause life?" Jinso sighed.
"How do you unpause a game?" He asked in return.
"You do the same thing you do to pau-Oh!"
"Exactly. Just shout 'Pause!' again, and life will unpause. Now please continue. I really want you to kick their asses so I can get back to where I need to be. Assassin's Creed isn't gonna play itself." Aaron and Rich nodded.
"Pause!" The bar patrons unfroze.
Aaron and Rich's fists lit up in flames.
"Whoa..." Aaron grinned. Then he punched a man in the face. Then he kicked him. Then a barrage of attacks came out of him. A number appeared beside him, and kept counting upwards.
"C-C-COMBO BREAKER!" A male voice announced out of nowhere. The man flew backwards into a wall; the meter had stopped at 100. Rich shouted "Pause!" again, and time stopped.
"What was that for? I wanted to punch some more people!" Aaron whined.
"Relax. I wanted to check our stats." A list appeared in front of Rich, and he scrolled through it.
Player 1: Aaron(Hiroshi Uchiha) (Prince Alren) (Illyon)
Stats: 100,000 HP 20,000 Chakra
Skills: Soul Beam, Dr. Octagonapus no Jutsu, God Form, Sword of Truths mastery, Genjutsu Mastery, Hax, Time Stop, Falcon Punch, Combo Breaker (Just to name a few)
Player 2: Rich(Rishi-Uzumaki-Namikaze)
Stats: 2,000 HP 3,000 Chakra
Skills: Time Stop, Hax, Raireza, Falcon Punch, Combo Breaker
Chapter 1: A Test of New Powers from the Crazy Yet Lovable Author!
Opponents:Bar Patron #1
Stats: 10 HP 2 Chakra
Skills: Drunken Idiocy
Bar Patron #2
Stats: 0 HP (KO) 3 Chakra
Skills: Nothing (WEAKASS)
Bar Patron #3
Stats: 50 HP 1 Chakra
Skills: Nothing
Bar Patron #4
Stats: 500 HP 300 Chakra
Skills: Shunshin, Kunai Throw, Shuriken Toss, Kawarimi, Substitution, Henge
Bar Patron #5
Stats: 20 HP 2 Chakra
Skills: Nothing
The list of opponents stopped there.
"Wow, one of 'em's a shinobi." Rich commented.
"Oh well. It's still fun to beat the shit out 'o someone!" Aaron said happily. He clapped, and the fight resumed back to normal. Bar Patron #1 rushed at Rich, but he side-stepped and falcon punched him in the face, sending him spiraling out into the sky, shouting,
"FALCON PAUNCH!" The man shouted,
"Looks like Team Rocket's blasting off again!" as he was flying. They also heard a faint cry of "Wobbuffet!" The man disappeared in a glint of light which looked like a star.
"Damn, you were right. You do need gloves for your hands not to hurt from that!" Rich said, rubbing his sore hand.
"Bar Patron #1: KO!" The male voice rang out from the sky.
"Battle, continue!"
"AW HELLZ YAH! Thank you, crazy author dude who controls the story!" Aaron said while looking at the sky. Everyone besides Rich gave him a "WTF?" look. A slight breeze went through the bar and whispered,
"You're welcome, but call me that again, and I kill off Anko..." Aaron nodded carefully. Then he turned back to the patrons and shouted "Pause!".
"What cheat should we pick now?" Aaron asked, scrolling through the list. Rich saw one he liked, and said,
"Let's try 'Mega Speed Boost'!" Aaron nodded, and tapped the cheat. The male voice rang out.
"Aaron and Rich speed boost to: MAX!"
"Hell yeah!" Rich cried out. Aaron clapped his hands, and time unfroze. He and Rich moved around so fast that the patrons seemed to be in 100x Slow-mo. They punched the last three patrons in the face, and finished their work. Jinso just faded away with an amused and pleased smile on his face. The breeze whipped through the bar again, this time whispering,
"I'm a happy waffle cake..."
BAR PATRONS DEFEAT!
ITEMS GAINED: NONE
RICH LEVEL UP: LVL 40
AARON LEVEL UP: LVL 40
RYOU GAINED: 100
EXP GAINED: 500
TROPHY UNLOCKED: 100x COMBO BREAKER!
REWARD: BRASS KNUCKLES OF DOOM AND PWNAGE x2
+500 EXP
+50 CHAKRA
QUEST FINISHED: TRIAL BY AUTHOR!
REWARD: CHEAT UNLOCKED: NON-SHARINGAN TSUKIYOMI!
"That was frickin' awesome!" Rich shouted. The other patrons who hadn't participated watched in shock at what had happened. In a flash, the two had taken out five patrons, and some mysterious voice had shouted upgrades and such. Aaron and Rich just walked outside.
"I wanna select a few more cheats before we get a night's rest." Aaron said. So he clapped and the world froze. The list appeared in front of him. He tapped six of them, and it disappeared.
"So what did you pick?" Rich asked him. He just pointed at the sky. As if Aaron had cued it, the male voice rang out,
"AARON AND RICH UPGRADE:
MAX STAMINA,
MAX INTELLIGENCE,
MAX STRENGTH,
MAX CHARM,
MAX KISSING ABILITY,
ALL TECHNIQUES UNLOCKED!"
"Max kissing ability?" Rich questioned. Aaron shrugged.
"Hey, gotta have some fun every once in a while!" He said happily. They just walked along the street until they ran into everyone else.
"You guys okay?" Hansuke asked.
"We're better than okay! We're 1337, bitches!" Rich announced, happy as a waffle cake(1). They just cocked their heads.
"W-Well, what should we do now?" Arine asked.
"Hang on." Rich said.
"Pause!"
"Falcon Punch for all Characters Unlocked" Check!
Are you sure?Yes!
FALCON PUNCH IS NOW UNLOCKED FOR ALL PLAYERS! HOORAY FOR YOU!
"Pause!"
"W-What was that?" Arine asked.
"Oh, nothing. Just that you all can do a falcon punch now." Aaron just grabbed Anko and started making out with her. When they broke apart. She swayed.
"Damn..." Anko said woozily.
"I GOT THE POWER!" Aaron said loudly in a sort-of autotuned voice, pumping his right fist in the air while keeping his left arm around Anko.
"I think we all need to get to bed. Today's becoming too crazy." Hansuke suggested. They nodded.
"See you all later!" Aaron said with a wave. They all walked to their homes and got in bed. Before he fell asleep, Aaron opened his cheats list and tapped "Anko's Curse Seal Removed" Then he said,
"Pause," and drifted off into the world of the subconscious mind.
Did joo lieks it?
(1): A term this author usually uses when he is happy. Note: This phrase can only be said by the insane, and if attempted by the sane, said sane person will lose the ability to talk forever. This only happens in the story, though.
Give me suggestions for cheats and such, and I will see you all soon! BAI BAI!
Cheat Unlocked: Awesome Reviews
BAI BAI, AGAIN PEOPLES!