HEY GUYS! IT IS TIME FOR CHAPTER 56! Man, this fic has been going on for a while. Did you all like the fact that I brought the Yondaime back?
IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK!
...
Nah, I'm just kidding. But does anyone know which fic I got that from?
Naruto from another fic: I know who you got it from, jabroni.
SHIT! Ok, look, I was just making a reference.
Other Naruto: I'm still mad.
Think of it this way, you'll get a bunch of horny fangirls who want to fuck you after reading that and your story, ok? That means about 20 times the sex.
Other Naruto: Hmmm...Do I still get to kill you?
NO! Besides, you can't kill me. I will exist as long as there is pie in the world. Also, if I wanted to, I could make you dress up in a tutu, shout "I'm a pretty ballerina", swirl around, and then start fucking Sasuke. You want that?
Other Naruto: Damn...You're one sick son of a bitch... *grins* I LIKE IT!
HELL YEAH, YOU DO! Mind if I start using the word jabroni?
Other Naruto: Yes, I do mind.
You'll get five dollars each time the word is used.
Other Naruto: Deal! You just made a deal with the devil.
Actually, it's more like you just made a deal with God.
Aaron: I'm God!
Other Naruto: *jerks thumb at Aaron* Who's this jabroni?
He's God. If he wanted to, he could snap you in half in one move.
Aaron: He's not lying. I'm more powerful than 6 Overlords.
Other Naruto: Shit...Ok, look, I won't call you a jabroni.
Aaron: Damn straight you won't.
By the way, what does Yamato think of me?
Other Naruto: Yamato? He's actually excited about sex.
Figures.
Yamato: HEY, I HEARD THAT!
Oh shut up, you overpowered sword. I have one that could kick your ass so hard, your blade will bend in half.
Yamato:...
That did it. Anyways, on with the chapter! Chapter 56:
DIVINE OVERKILL: WHY IT'S GOOD TO BE GOD!
Second to last thing: Those characters—that other Naruto and the sword named Yamato—are from the fic "Everyone has Darkness". Be warned, it has mature content not suitable for children under the age of...Wait a minute! What the fuck am I saying! I don't give a shit if it's unsuitable for children under some age!
One last thing. I HAVE REACHED OVER 100 REVIEWS! YAYYYYY! As a reward for being the best fucking reviewers ever—and guessing that some of you want something to jack off to or shit like that—I have decided this:
...
FUCK THE CONTEST! You're all gonna get a lemon to read in this chapter!
Other Naruto: Who the fuck are you talking to?
The readers...
Other Naruto: Oh.
...
On with the show!
Chapter...BEGIN!
"G-G-G-God?" The leader of the Iwa-nin asked. Aaron raised an eyebrow.
"Do I need to repeat myself?" He asked them. They were silent. Aaron sighed and facepalmed.
"I already know one terrorist who fits the stereotype of blondes. Of course, Iwa has to have 1000 others of that kind." Then he grinned.
"I am one whose looks make women wet at the sight; I am the one who attacks with divine justice; I AM THE ONE WHOSE MERE NAME STRIKES FEAR INTO THE HEARTS OF HIS ENEMIES, LETTING THEM KNOW THAT THEY'RE FUCKED! I AM...GOD!" That cued the passing out of about 20 more Iwa Jounin. Aaron smirked.
"The 70 of you in this room still conscious are brave..." Suddenly, five copies of him faded into existence beside him, forming a straight line.
"But courage is only a bit of what you need..." The six Aarons leapt at the 70 Iwa-nin, and began pummeling them into mangled, bloody lumps. The ones he didn't pummel—who were unconscious—he decapitated. When he reached the leader (whom he purposely saved for last), the Jounin said,
"Please...spare me..."
"Why should I?" Aaron asked.
"You come into my home village without warning or motives for peace, invade the residence of said village's leader, whom I spent the whole night arguing with the Shinigami to get back, try to kill him, and you expect me to spare you?" The man was shaking where he stood, too scared to answer.
"I think I will let you live." Aaron said. The man let out a held breath.
"But you will be the only one to live." The hairs on the back of the man's neck stood on end, and he flinched at Aaron's tone.
"You will report back to your leader, and say..." Aaron leaned into the Jounin's ear, and whispered something. The shinobi's eyes widened, but he nodded, quivering. Aaron then snapped his fingers, and the man disappeared.
"What did you do?" Minato asked.
"I simply transported him about five miles from his village."
"Oh."
"..."
"..."
"Time to get the rest." Aaron said happily. Minato moved to get up, but Aaron raised his hand and said,
"I can handle it. The Hokage shouldn't have to lift a finger." Minato sat back down.
"I'll be back in about a few minutes to tell you what happened from after you died to today." With that, Aaron zoomed into the hallway in the form of a black streak. Minato blinked once...then twice...then a third time. Then he asked,
"Did he just use the Hiraishin?"
Outside in the Hallway
An Iwa-nin was holding Shizune by her hair while another slapped her.
"Be quiet, bitch!" The one who slapped her said.
"But..." She weakly protested. The Jounin slapped her again.
"I SAID BE QUIET!" Shizune stopped talking.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk..." Aaron said from the opposite side of the hallway. The two Jounin stared at him while Shizune lifted her head up and gasped at who she saw.
"Where's your honor?"
"..."
"..."
"What?"
"I said, where's your honor?"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHERE'S MY HONOR!" The Jounin who had slapped Shizune shouted.
"You attacked a virtually harmless—to you—woman when she could not defend. Your honor is gone." He said, growing a cold look.
"I HAVE MY FUCKING HONOR, YOU LITTLE SHIT!" Aaron chuckled.
"Funny, we seem about the same height, and yet, you call me little." The Jounin became outraged.
"WHY YOU—"
"Calm down, Haido! He's just trying to get in your head. All these Konoha bastards are like that." The other Iwa-nin said, spitting out the word "bastards".
"Fine, Rya." Haido said reluctantly.
"A bastard I may be, but you both are honor-less kuso(1) who shame their families." Aaron retorted. That got both of the shinobi's blood boiling.
"THAT'S IT! I'M GONNA KILL HIM!" Rya and Haido shouted at the same time. They both charged at him, which proved to be their biggest mistake. Aaron smirked. Rya and Haido pulled out a kunai each, intent on stabbing Aaron. They shoved their kunai into his stomach, only for him to fade out of existence.
"What the—" He reappeared behind them and chopped off their heads in one swift blow.
...
With his hand...
Aaron walked over to Shizune and helped her up.
"You alright?" He asked her.
"Y-Yeah..." She suddenly clutched her ribs, and spat out a glob of blood. Aaron chuckled.
"No you aren't. Let me just check really quickly." His hands had yellow glow surround them, and he moved them around her ribs for a moment.
"You have three broken ribs and a bruised lung." He stated with a whistle. Then Aaron raised an eyebrow at her.
"What'd they do to you, Shizune?"
"They kicked me in the chest many times and kept slapping me." She was starting to tear up. He nodded.
"I'll heal you." His hands glowed blue this time, and he moved them over her chest. Shizune let out a wistful sigh.
"How did that feel?" He asked her.
"Like heaven..." Aaron chuckled.
"Well, that's what it feels like when the god of medics heals you."
"I'll teleport you to Tsunade's house. Tell her I ordered you to stay with her for the night." Shizune nodded. Aaron snapped his fingers, and she disappeared. Then he grinned and phased out of existence.
1 Floor Down
"Please! Don't hurt her!" A woman cried out. She had brought her daughter to work today, only for a thousand Iwa-nin to appear and take everyone hostage.
"Shut up!" The one holding her daughter captive yelled, moving his arm to slap her face. However, Aaron appeared right in front of him and caught the arm with which he intended to slap her.
"Shi-ne." He merely said. Aaron's hand tightened like a snake around the arm, making the Iwa shinobi cry out. There was sixty-nine other Iwa shinobi in that area with them, and they all were surprised at how he appeared out of nowhere. Aaron quite literally crushed the man's arm, leaving it mangled and bloody; broken bones protruding from his skin.
"Scum like you make me sick." He snarled. Aaron then grabbed the man's head, slammed it into the ground, and pile-drived his stomach, making the shinobi howl in pain. Aaron then grabbed the man by the throat, and tossed him up in the air. He then delivered a series of rapid vertical spin kicks to the man's back, sending him up until he hit the ceiling. Then the man descended, and Aaron finished him off with a punch in the gut, sending him through the floor and down to the bottom of the Hokage Tower, collapsing into a bloody mess.
"I call that..." He grinned sadistically.
"Divine Overkill..." Aaron bent down to the little girl trembling beside him.
"You alright?" He asked her. The girl nodded shakily. He then helped her over to her mom, and teleported them away. Minato came running down the stairs.
"Is everything ok?" He asked. The Iwa shinobi almost immediately shit their pants and gasped.
"IT'S THE YONDAIME!"
"Get all the innocents to safety." Aaron ordered, looking at Minato out of the corner of his left eye. His gaze then drifted to the shinobi in front of him. A pain-promising smirk appeared on his face.
"I'll deal with them."
"How come you get to?" Minato asked.
"You already got a turn taking down ten thousand by yourself. Don't be selfish." Minato pouted, but said,
"Fine." The Fourth then disappeared via Hiraishin and began getting the innocents to safety.
"Phew! We don't have to deal with him!" One of the shinobi said. The look in Aaron's eyes made his blood turn cold.
"No, but you'll have to deal with someone much worse." That look...It was one of bloodlust...of sadistic-ness...of...annoyance?
"You know...I was going to go home after talking with the Hokage...do you know what would have awaited me there?" Aaron asked.
"Um...no...what?" One of the shinobi asked.
"My beautiful fiancé, who was going to have sex with me..." His eyes were then filled with anger.
"BUT YOU MOTHERFUCKERS COCK-BLOCKED ME!" Aaron screamed. They all flinched.
"And do you know what happens...when you cock-block a god?" He asked in a calm voice.
"No..."
"SHIT HITS THE GODDAMN FAN!" He moved around in a black streak, and one by one the shinobi were cut into pieces. He did the same with the shinobi that the Yondaime had not managed to kill yet. The entire tower was covered in blood on the inside.
"There we go. All done." He said.
"That was one hell of a fight." Minato commented.
"Yeah...it was awesome..." Aaron clapped his hands together.
"I'll just clean up this mess..." He gave a flick of his wrist and all the blood disappeared.
"So are you gonna tell me about Naruto's past?" Minato asked him.
"Sorry, but I'll have to tell you tomorrow. I'm flat out tired and I need to relax." Minato nodded.
"Go ahead." Aaron then teleported away.
Aaron's House
Anko and Konan were both splayed about on a chair each, unconscious from drinking. Aaron reappeared in the middle of the room.
'Why're they asleep?' He thought. Aaron shook both their shoulders. Anko stirred first.
"Hey, stud." She said.
"Hey. I'm back." Konan was still unconscious.
"Mmmm...Just like that..." She mumbled. Konan then placed her hand on her right breast and started fondling it. Aaron raised an eyebrow.
"I'll just wake her up." He went over to Konan and shook her shoulder, making her eyes open.
"Huh?..." She asked. Konan was staring up at Aaron's face. Then she realized where her hand was and her eyes widened. Her face then turned a light pink shade.
"Oh jeez..." Konan mumbled.
"Wanna make that dream a reality?" Aaron asked. She 'Eep!'d.
"I'll take that as a yes." He picked up both Konan and Anko and slung them over his shoulders.
"Hey, where are you going?" Anko asked.
"Jinso!" Aaron yelled.
RIGHT!
BGM ACTIVATED: Marvin Gaye: Let's get it on
2 Hours Later
"Damn, that was good..."
Chapter...END!
Listen people. I know this chapter originally had a lemon in it. But, due to the dumbass owners of trying to ruin us author's lives with incessant banning and removal, I had to remove it. IT'S FUCKING BULLSHIT!
Well, anyways, you all know what to do.
(1) Kuso: Means fuck or shit. In this case it means shit.
Until next time...
R & MOTHAFUCKING R!
~Jinso ^3^