First off, thank you so much for all the reviews and over 100 alerts! It makes me really happy that so many seem to enjoy this little ficlet. :-)
Second, I know it seems to be like forever since I last updated this and I'm sorry for the long wait. But I don't like to force my writing in a certain direction. My muse just doesn't work that way. She just refuses to give me anything if I try to will her into submission. But she was cooperative today, so you'll get this long overdue update and I hope you're thrilled to hear that it got completely out of hand, length-wise. Expect another rollercoaster ride. :-)
Before you start to read you should know that I am a huge Moonlighting fan. Bruce Willis as David Addison was my first TV crush. :-) David and Maddie were just so much fun to watch. Nick and Jess really remind me a lot of those two. Their fights were legendary and their kisses as passionate as the kisses between Nick and Jess. So yeah, I couldn't resist using the show in this chapter.
If you didn't know the show you might want to watch the fighting/kiss scene between David and Maddie at the end of season 3 (search for David and Maddie sex scene on Google and you will find some links). It's actually the scene that started the whole Moonlighting curse, which I'm sure you've already heard about, and it's the scene Jess is watching over and over again in this chapter.
Chapter 9
"How often do you need to watch this per day again?" Cece asked tentatively, wrapping a towel around her wet hair as she walked over to the couch Jess was sitting on. The song 'Be my Baby' was coming from the screen and she groaned inwardly, preparing herself for watching the movie over and over again for at least a week.
"It's not 'Dirty Dancing'." Jess replied, not taking her eyes away from the scene on the TV.
"But the song ..." Cece said confused.
"Yes, it's also a 'Dirty Dancing' song but I'm not watching 'Dirty Dancing'." Jess said absentmindedly.
"What is this?" Cece asked, her gaze wandering for the first time towards the screen and she needed only a few seconds to recognize what Jess was watching. "Wait a second. That's Bruce Willis. You are watching 'Moonlighting'?"
"Yeah. I thought I needed a change."
"But 'Moonlighting'?" Cece asked with utter disbelief. "Do you really think that's such a good idea?"
"Why not?" Jess replied. "At least you don't have to watch the same movie over and over again with me. I thought you would appreciate that."
"Jess, are you trying to torture yourself more than necessary?"
"What do you mean?" Jess asked, pressing the rewind button to rewatch the whole making-out scene.
"This." Cece said exasperatedly as Jess started the episode again, the angry voices of David and Maddie filling the room as they had one of their shouting matches on-screen. "They are so much like you two."
"I have no idea what you are talking about."
"Look at them." Cece said, her voice getting louder.
"What am I looking for?" Jess asked, throwing a questioning look towards her best friend.
"Do you really don't see the parallels?"
"What parallels?"
"Look how they get in each other's faces."
"That's what they do." Jess said calmly. "Come on, Cece, we've watched the re-runs together when we were teenagers. You know shouting matches between David and Maddie were the order of the day. I always considered it kind of a verbal foreplay between them until they finally stopped being such sissies and just got it over with."
"And that doesn't remind you of anyone else?" Cece asked, shaking her head slightly. "Are you deliberately so dense or do you really not see it?"
"I never slapped Nick." Jess replied, knowing damn well what Cece was talking about. Deep down she knew that watching this show was only deepening the pain. Because of course she saw the parallels. You had to be blind and deaf to not see and hear it.
"But I'm sure you've thought about it."
"Yeah, maybe once or twice." Jess admitted. "He can be so stubborn sometimes."
"So you yell at him." Cece said, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.
"Yes. Because he is really infuriating from time to time."
"And you're enjoying your shouting matches, aren't you?"
"Of course not." Jess said firmly. "We are yelling at each other."
"Are you sure?"
"Fine." Jess huffed out a sigh of frustration. "I might enjoy it a little bit."
"So you two are like David and Maddie."
"Cece, it doesn't matter if we are like them or not." Jess spoke tiredly. Talking about it just made her heart ache more and she didn't know how much more she could take before she would break. "It's over. So would you please just let me watch this? I don't want to talk anymore."
Cece watched her from the side, seeing the stubborn set of her jaw and she knew there was nothing else she could say right now. There were no words left to ease the pain. "Okay."
~N&J~
It had been two weeks since he'd seen Jess the last time. Two weeks since she'd told him that it was over, that they needed to stop whatever was between them. He had the oddest mood swings. One minute he was filled with anger. Anger towards her for pushing him out of her life. And then, only a minute later he thought his heart would stop beating as hurt filled his body. Hurt about her thinking that he could never make it work, that he didn't feel enough for her.
Snorting out a sound of disgust, he shook his head. Not feeling enough? He was definitely feeling too much. He shouldn't have pushed her all those weeks ago on the rooftop. He should have left the roof. If he had they wouldn't be at this point now. Their friendship wouldn't be ruined. Because of course he would be lying if he said that he didn't miss the sex, it had been freaking amazing after all, but what he missed more was his friend.
Crossing the line was never a good idea. He'd just gotten the proof that sleeping with one of your best friend could only end in disaster. But God, he loved her. He was so deeply and madly in love with her that he didn't know how he should live without her. But he was too much of a coward to just tell her. To lay his heart into her hands, hoping for her to not crush it.
Nick was so deep in thoughts that he didn't even hear the door open and he almost jumped up from the couch as something dropped into his lap. As he looked down he saw a DVD box laying in his lap and he looked up confused, discovering that Cece was standing beside the couch.
"What is this?" He asked.
"Your homework."
"My homework?" Nick said, completely stunned now. The two figures on the cover looked familiar and in the same moment he recognized the man and realized what show it was, Cece told him what he already knew.
"Season three of 'Moonlighting'."
"And why exactly do I need to watch it?"
"I would have recommended the whole series but I don't think you have the time to go through all five seasons, so season three it is." Cece replied, not really answering his question.
"You don't make any sense, Cece."
"Jess is currently watching this. Up and down. Not 'Dirty Dancing' but this. Especially episode fourteen where David and Maddie finally sleep together. I'm sure even you have heard of the 'Moonlighting' curse. That's the scene that started it."
"And how should watching this help in any way?" Nick asked, sitting up straighter. Cece had clearly given him this to tell him something. Apparently Jess' best friend was trying to help and the fact that she was standing in front of him had to mean that it might not be over between Jess and him after all.
"I swear if you don't want to see the parallels either or are just denying the parallels I'm gonna slap you with a baseball bat." Cece growled, pointing an accusing finger at him. Nick stared up at her, not able to say anything. He would never admit it out loud but Cece frightened him sometimes and he didn't doubt it for a second that she would make good on her promise. "Just watch it. You might be a man but I'm sure you're gonna realize that there must be a reason why she is watching this instead of 'Dirty Dancing'."
She turned around and stomped towards the door but Nick couldn't help to shout after her. "Is she okay, Cece?"
Cece stopped dead in her tracks and turned around slowly. "No, she is not okay, Nick. She is so not okay." Her features softened a little bit as she saw the seriousness on his face and she added quietly. "So you better fix this, Miller. Before you lose the best thing that ever happened to you."
As the door fell close behind her Nick exhaled a shuddering breath and stared at the DVD box. He had no clue how this should help but he would do anything to get her back. Because he knew that Jess was the best thing that ever happened to him and he would not lose her.
~N&J~
"Where are you going?" Cece asked surprised as she looked up and saw Jess standing in the middle of her living room all dressed up.
"Out."
"What do you mean with out?"
"I'm just taking Nick's advice." Jess said quietly, shrugging one shoulder.
"And that is?" Cece prodded.
"I'm going out on a date with the guy I'm having sex with."
"He actually said that to you?" Cece said, completely baffled. "When?"
"A few months ago."
"So you are already having sex with another man?" Cece asked softly. Apparently she'd tried to intervene too late. Jess apparently wanted to move on. But she could see the sadness, lingering deep in her eyes. Jess didn't want to move on. She only wanted one man and this man was Nick.
"No, but I'm planning on it. You know, get back on the saddle?"
"Jess, shouldn't you wait a little ..." Cece started, trying to make her see how utterly wrong going out on a date with another man than Nick would be but Jess interrupted her.
"For what?" Jess shouted angrily. "Cece, he doesn't love me."
"So you finally admit that you are in love with him?"
"Of course I am. How should I not?" Jess yelled and seeing the sympathetic look on Cece's face she added barely above a whisper. "It's Nick, Cece. Of course I love him."
"Did you tell him?" Cece asked, certain that Jess hadn't told him. After all she'd seen the forlorn expression on Nick's face. She was pretty sure that he loved her too but it was not her place to tell Jess. Nick had to tell her himself.
"And scare the crap out of him?" Jess replied, shaking her head. "No, I didn't tell him. He might jump out of the window. You know he is not good with feelings."
"So you'll want to forget him by jumping into bed with another guy?" Cece said, wanting to throttle her for thinking that going out on a date would help in any way. It never did.
"Yeah, life must go on, right?"
"That's never gonna work, Jess." Cece said urgently. She needed to stop her. Otherwise Jess would regret it for the rest of her life.
"But I have to try."
"You are not gonna fall out of love with him." Cece tried to convince her. "You are only gonna hate yourself afterwards. It's been only four weeks. Give yourself some time, Jess."
"Yeah, it's been four weeks. Time to move on."
"Jess, no. This is a bad idea."
"Don't try to stop me, Cece. I need to forget him and there is no better way to erase the memories than … I need another man, Cece. I can't go on like this. The memories are driving me crazy. I need something … I need it to stop."
"Jess, please."
"Don't wait up for me. I don't know if I'm coming home."
Cece jumped up from the couch, wanting to hold her back but Jess was already out of the door and Cece just stared at the closed door, cursing Nick for being such a coward.
~N&J~
Jess didn't know what had possessed her to drop by the loft before she went out on the date. Maybe she wanted to show Nick that not being with him didn't matter to her at all. She knew that it was wrong. Because after all she had been the one who ended it. It wasn't Nick's fault. Though it was actually partly his fault. After all he didn't love her back.
"Jess?" His voice coming from the direction of his room made her almost jump and her heart was beating painfully against her ribcage as she turned around to face him. Seeing him for the first time after four weeks knocked the breath out of her. She had missed him so much.
"Hey, Nick."
"How are you doing?" Nick said softly.
He had tried to call her several times but never found the courage to press the call button. He'd chickened out, not knowing what he should say to her. He didn't know how he should tell her that he was in love with her, that he really wanted to be with her.
Watching 'Moonlighting' didn't really help, though he'd actually seen the parallels. But he wasn't sure if the fact that Jess had been watching it meant that she had as a hard time to forget what had been between them as he. He just didn't know how he could make her see that they were perfect for each other. Because in his eyes she was perfect. Perfect for him.
"I'm fine." Jess replied, pressing the words past the lump in her throat. She would not start to cry. She would not let him see how much this whole situation was affecting her.
"Are you going out?" Nick asked quietly, pointing towards her attire. "With Cece?"
"No. I'm having a date." Jess told him and wanting to hurt him, she added. "With a man."
"You're having a date?" Nick asked incredulously. The sharp pain in his chest told him that she'd just ripped his heart out. He thought that she was maybe feeling the same way as he, that she might love him too. But apparently Cece had been wrong. Jess didn't want him. She was just fine without him in her life.
"Yes. I'm having a date." Jess repeated, almost choking on the next words. But it just hurt too much to see him standing in front of her, to be so near to him without being able to touch him. She loved him so much but he just didn't love her back and she lashed out, knowing that he didn't deserve her wrath but not caring in the least. "I'm having a date with the man I'm having sex with."
"That didn't take you long, did it?" Nick hissed furiously. He wouldn't have thought that it could hurt so much to see her moving on. He didn't want her to move on. She should be with him. The hurt he felt made him throw words at her he shouldn't say, words he knew would hurt her. But he couldn't help himself. "I hope he can satisfy you. Because I apparently wasn't able to. Maybe his dick is enough for you."
"I'm not some slut." Jess said, stiffening upon hearing his hateful words. The words hurt more than they should. He had apparently no idea that she didn't see any other way to get him out of her head.
"Well, it damn looks that way to me." Nick snapped. "So how many did you already have, Jessica? I'm sure he is not the first one since you threw me out of Cece's apartment."
"You are … you damn ..." Jess clenched her teeth, her hands curling into fists beside her body. Now she knew why Maddie slapped David. She would also like to slap Nick right now. Didn't he know how much she had missed him?
"What? Do you want me to warm you up?" His scorching voice felt like he'd plunged a knife in her heart, twisting it to make it hurt even more. "You know, be your fluffer? And I don't mean your emotional fluffer."
"You are one mean son of a bitch, Nicholas Miller." Jess yelled, her eyes shooting daggers at him. "Just tell me one thing. Can you give me one freaking reason why I shouldn't go out with him?"
"I'll give you one freaking reason." Nick shouted, grabbing her arms and shaking her. He was so mad at her and he'd never loved her more than right in this moment but even he was surprised about the words that came out of his mouth next. "Because I love you. That's why."
They both froze, staring at each other with the same slack-jawed expression on their faces. Nick's hands dropped from her arms and he stepped back, averting his gaze to the ground, afraid to look at her, afraid to see pity in her eyes. He didn't think he would survive it if she would tell him that she didn't love him back.
Jess' heart was beating wildly in her chest, her mind was reeling, replaying his words over and over in her head. Could it be true? Did he really say that he loved her or was she just so desperately in love with him that her mind was playing tricks on her? Letting her hear what she wanted to hear?
"What did you just say?" Jess croaked out, wanting to hear it again, needed to hear it again.
"Nothing!" Nick replied, still refusing to look at her. He'd never felt more vulnerable in his whole life.
"That was definitely not nothing." Jess said quietly and stepping closer she put a tentative hand on his arm. "Did you mean it?"
She could feel him tremble under her fingers and she lifted her hand, cupping his cheek, turning his head towards her. "Nick?"
Nick gulped hard, knowing that he had to face her. It was now or never. For once in his life he needed to stop being a coward and just needed to hope for the best. So he lifted his eyes, meeting hers, whispering hoarsely. "Yes, I meant it. I'm in love with you, Jessica Day. I've been in love with you for a very long time."
"Why didn't you say anything sooner?" Jess said softly, her thumb brushing over his cheek and his hands found their way to her waist and he leaned his forehead against hers, taking in a sharp breath. "What were you afraid of, Nick?"
"That you are not sharing my feelings." Nick stated quietly, closing his eyes as he pulled her into his body. He wanted to feel her against him. It might be the last time he would ever feel her so close to him and he was determined to enjoy every second of it.
"But I do share them." Jess whispered, her breath brushing over his lips and Nick jerked back with surprise, searching her eyes.
"You do?"
"Yes, I do." Jess said, closing the gap to press a soft kiss against his lips. "I love you, Nicholas Miller. I'm in love with you."
"I'm scared, Jess."
"Of what?" Jess asked, wrapping her arms around him and leaning her head against his shoulder.
"Of screwing it up."
"Then we just have to not screw it up."
Nick chuckled and she smiled, leaning back to look up at him. "You think we'll be able to not screw it up? Because you know to whom you are talking, right? I'm Nick Miller. The ultimate screw-up. Why should this be the first thing I don't screw up?"
"Because I love you. We are gonna make this work. I just know it."
"I hope you are right." Nick said, pulling her hard into his body, almost crushing her. "I can't lose you, Jess. I don't know how to live without you."
Her arms tightened around him as she replied. "You don't have to. I'm not gonna leave you. You are stuck with me, Nicholas."
"Don't ever leave me again, Jess. These last four weeks were hell."
"For me, too." Jess bent back, her eyes twinkling up at him as she gave him a brilliant smile. "You know what? I can't live without you either."
"Good." Nick said, capturing her lips in a searing kiss. "Now get your damn phone out and call off your date. You are not having sex with some random guy. You are going to have sex with me."
"So you are the guy I will go out on a date with?" Jess asked, her smile almost splitting up her face. "Because of the whole 'having dates with the guy I'm having sex with' thing."
"Yeah, I'm that guy." Nick smiled back. "But you have to wait a little."
"Wait for what?"
"The date. I'm going to have sex with you right now. I'm not waiting another second."
"You're a sex addict, Nicholas." Jess chuckled, letting out a shriek as he bent down and lifted her up, throwing her over his shoulder.
"As if you are any better." Nick growled, wrapping his arm over her legs so that she wouldn't drop down.
"No, I'm not." Jess replied huskily, anticipation coiling deep in her stomach. "I'm as much of a sex addict as you."
"Good. Then we don't have a problem."
"No, there is no problem at all. Just get me to your room, Nick."
As he stepped into his room he lowered her to the ground carefully, threading his hands through her hair as he tilted her head, lowering his face slowly until his lips brushed over hers. "I missed you so much, Jess."
"I missed you, too." Jess whispered, wrapping her hands around his neck, kissing him hungrily.
They stumbled towards the bed, falling down on it hard, never stopping the kiss, forgetting everything that had happened over the last four weeks. They were just happy that they were finally in each other's arms again. Nothing had ever felt so right. They would make it work. Because neither of them was willing to even consider any other possibility. They loved each other and they would prove that love could sometimes be enough.
Okay, guys! This is actually the end. There will be an epilogue because a Valentine's idea hit me but this journey is almost over. I'm already pondering a sequel but I'm not entirely sure about it because I hardly write stories where my couple is in an established relationship and I have no idea if I'm any good at it. So I'm gonna mull over this for a little while.
So tell me if you want to see some smut in the epilogue too or if you want it to be solely fluffy. I can include a hot scene but it's not really necessary. It's your decision! :-)
Okay, I decided to give this story the complete stamp because the epilog just doesn't want to come out. Thank you all for reviewing, favoriting and following. Thank you for going on this journey with me!