Human nature
Part 2- Terminology, character references and random pies.
I'm in Equestria…
Yes, yes you are.
Holy crap I'm a human in Equestria!
I think we have established that fact already.
Discord? I can hear you but I can't see you, and why is there a laptop typing everything I say?
I thought the other members of your species would want to know what happened to you, I do not need your world's military ruining my plans. Also turn around.
You have plans?
Is it really that hard to believe?
You're Discord, spirit of chaos and disharmony hello ring any bells? Chaos and planning don't exactly go together.
Neither do cotton candy clouds and chocolate rain, but here they are. And did you just alter one my lines from the show?
Eeyup.
You did not just say that…
I said it all right, humans rule and Discord drools.
Oh do they now? Let's see if I can turn the tables on this shall I?
Hey what are you doing wit that pie- MY HAIR!
And that is why you should never mess with the spirit of chaos kiddies.
My Hair! YOU RUINED MY HAIR!
Do you have any Idea how vain you sound right now?
God damn it Discord you-
Now I'll cut you off there Human, since you are clearly not on your home planet any more, I suggest you use the correct terminology.
But my hair….
Stop your whining already it can be washed out, or do you want cotton candy mixed in there as well?
Keep the fairy floss away if you know what's good for you.
We are in Equestria use the correct terminology will you?
I'm Australian; I am using the correct terminology!
But you are not on your planet anymore so please for the love of chaos say things properly!
Make me.
I could turn you into a pony, and then you would have no choice but to use this world's terms.
How would tuning me into a pony cause that?
The ancient magic of this world has certain laws that not even I can break, one of them being that human behaviour and terminology must not exist, and everypony will speak using terms that are meant for ponies.
Then wouldn't my presence break the rules?
Why do you think I brought you here in the first place?
Oh wow I knew it! Cotton candy clouds and chocolate milk rain! Yippie! This is the best day ever!
Did you just hear-?
The element of laughter? Yes I did.
Gasp! Discord! So you're behind the wonderful-but evil- chocolate rain? I knew it! Hey who's that with you? It looks like a weird monkey. Hi monkey! I'm pinkie pie! What's your name?
What is Pinkie doing here?
Well the chapter name did say something about random pies.
Oh! oh! You have pie? Can I have some?
Uh….?
Oh no wait! there's no time for pie. Discord's back! I have to go tell the princess! Gasp! I have to get the others and wield the elements of harmony and stop Discord! Again! Then that means…Oh my gosh! the weird monkey is something Discord summoned! it must be some weird evil chaos spreading monster! You wait right there I'll be right back!
She said that so fast…with so many exclamation marks…
That's the element of laughter for you.
Discord?
Yes human?
We are so screwed aren't we?
Maybe, but you can never be too sure.
And why is that?
Because I am the spirit of chaos and disharmony, if anyone can get us out of this, it will be me.
Right…we're screwed.
Oh ha hah the readers can just about see the deadpan in your voice.
Lovely...Oh look here they come.
This is Discord and the human signing off!