Housekeeping
I'm actually going to post a bit about Victoria's life outside the asylum. I'm a bit addicted to the music from the band E-Rotic so enjoy yet another song called 'sex machine'.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Thinking
Alternate Personality Speaking
Speaking
Monday
I woke up and spent an hour debating with my ceiling if I should roll over and go back to sleep. I slipped out of bed and tugged on my pajama pants. The pink cartoon ducks stared up at me with goofy grins painted on their faces. My top was basically just a camisole with lace around the edges. I was drained and trudged towards my bathroom wondering how much toothpaste I had left. A pounding on my door pulled me from my thoughts and I swung open the door without even checking first. I was met with an eye full of red roses by a delivery man who was more interested in staring at my chest then speaking.
"Can I help you?" My voice snapped him from his thoughts and he shoved the roses at me.
"Delivery for Ms. Victoria. Enjoy." He was gone just as quickly as he had arrived. I slammed the door shut and walked into my kitchen to look for something to put the flowers in. I found an old vase and filled it with water before depositing the flowers inside. I almost missed the tiny card shoved behind the vibrant buds. I pulled it from its tiny envelope.
'Who tickles your brain, vies for your heart, and will make you scream from your bed in the dark?' It was signed with a vibrant green question mark.
"Edward how in the world were you allowed to send flowers let alone roses?" They smelled divine and they made me feel better. Even though they were sent by an obsessed mental patient I still felt better. Go figure. I walked towards my bathroom and knew a bubble bath sounded divine, I had a new bottle of lilac bath salts and I was going to soak till I pruned.
The water was hot and colored a light purple from the bath salts, I poured in a bit of bubble bath and swirled it around until I got a nice foam going. I stripped and slipped in thankful for the enveloping warmth from the water. I started singing to myself as I scrubbed my body clean.
Sex machine
I'm running so hot with your energy
I'll get you going faster
Sex machine
You put me on top of my ecstasy
We're heading for disaster
Sex machine
You're my sex machine
1-2-3-5 Baby let your engine roar
I'll show you what I'm longing for
A small one is not enough
Cos I'm looking for a lot of love
Turn your sex machine
So strong and hot and wild and mean
Do it - Feel it - Whow
Please don't stop your engine now
I was just laying in the tub drowsily singing to myself enjoying the scent of lilac in the air. I dipped my head into the water before singing softly to myself again.
You're my sex machine
1-2-3 Speak - Hey you're like a machine gun
I need some pleasure –
I need some funI want it –
So speed it up – Speed it up
And find my cupJust handle your instrument
I feel – Feel it's all in your hand
I need it baby anyhow
Please don't stop your engine now
I slipped from my bath thanks to a loud pounding on my door. I slid my fuzzy blue robe over my shoulders and tied it tightly around my body making sure nothing showed. I was dripping water all over my nice wooden floors and I wondered who it could be. I couldn't tell who it was from looking out my peephole so I locked my chain and slid the door open a few inches.
"Can I help you?" I saw another delivery man, he looked nervous holding a box and another bundle of flowers.
"D-delivery for a Miss Victoria." I opened the door and he shoved the items in my hands before running off as fast as he could. I looked down at the box before yelling at his retreating figure.
"If this is a bomb I'm so haunting your ass!" My door couldn't slam hard enough so I locked it and walked to my kitchen once again. I didn't have any more vases so I pulled out a large plastic slurpie cup and filled it with water. The flowers looked like someone had walked through the florist's shop and grabbed whatever, a totally chaotic blend of carnations, lily's, roses, daisies, baby's breath and fern leaves. I pulled the card from the flowers and found it blank. The box was another story. It was the size of an egg carton and wrapped in shiny red paper with a black bow tying it together. I opened it and to my surprise there was no bomb inside. Instead there was a lacy pair of purple and green thong and panty sets with a card attached.
'Saw these and thought of you. ~J'
"How in the seven layers of hell did he know my size?" I nearly threw the box across my living room but before I could even pick it up there was another pounding on my door. I took a calming breath and walked over to see who it was. Much to my surprise there was yet another delivery guy. This one looked kinda shady though. I unlocked everything but my chain and opened the door a crack.
"Yes?"
"Are you Ms. Victoria?" He spoke clearly and held a wrapped basket and a bundle of flowers.
"Yes I am. Hold on a second." I opened the door and took the basket and flowers from him. He tipped his hat to me and walked off calmly. "Have a good day ma'am."
I had to set the basket down to lock my door and once again marched to my kitchen. My hopes of returning to my bath were dashed for the day. I found another slurpie cup and set the bouquet of red and blue roses inside. There was a small card tucked behind one of the blooms and I pulled it out carefully.
'We miss you.' There was no signature just two small birds drawn on the sides a white crane and a black crow. Apparently Henry's talk was forgotten as soon as it had been given. I unwrapped the basket and saw an expensive bottle of wine sitting in the arms of a small stuffed scarecrow. The eyes had been replaced with blue buttons, I could still see the black sewn exes behind them, and he had a small pair of doll glasses on. I slipped the bottle of wine into my near empty fridge and checked the doll for any cameras or explosives. Finding nothing electronic or sharp I snuggled it to my chest and sighed looking at my counter top now full of flowers.
"What am I going to do now?" I took the doll to my bed and tucked him in before returning to drain my bath.
You're my sex machine
You're my sex machine –
Come on Oh come closer –
Oh be my sex machine
Oh oh ooohhh
The water was still warm and I instead stripped off my robe and slid back into the comforting heat. I would need to move. They all knew where I lived now. I sighed and sunk down in the water until it was almost over my nose. Why are all the hot ones crazy? I slid down under the water to wash my hair.
Tuesday
I didn't bother getting dressed and planned to spend the day curled up on my couch watching sappy romance movies while feeling sorry for myself and eating a pint of ice cream. I popped in 'Phantom of the Opera' and curled up under a multi-colored afghan knitted by my grandmother. Just before I could get lost in the musical sexiness that was Gerard Butler my door decided to make knocking sounds. I paused the movie and slid out from the warm cocoon I had made. My pink bunny slippers were a sharp contrast to the dark blue robe I was wearing. I looked through the peephole and once again saw a nervous man holding flowers.
"Hello?" I opened the door a bit and the poor man almost jumped out of his skin.
"D-delivery f-for M-ms. V-V-Victoria." The poor man was sweating and shaking like a leaf.
"That's me. Everything alright?" He nodded and shoved the flowers and a small box at me before slinking off as if I'd bitten him. "And here we go again." I made doubly sure that my door was locked before walking into my kitchen. I was running out of slurpie cups as I put the daisies into some water and added them to my wall of flowers. There was no card in the flowers so I inspected the small box. It was the size of a wallet and felt like black velvet. I opened it and was greeted by a small card lying underneath a beautiful bracelet set with shining emerald-green stones. There were small question mark charms set after every few stones so I quickly figured out it was from Edward. This was too much. I grabbed the card and set the box as far away from me as I could. My hands were shaking as I opened the tiny envelope and pulled the card from within.
'Who smiles like sunshine, brightens my day, and would look stunning in white lace?' It was signed with the green question mark again.
"Edward this is too much." I was just the housekeeper. These men were wooing me as if they were free men who I happened to run into at maybe a bar or the coffee shop. I fell to my knees and shook for a moment I can't get attached to any of them. They'll more than likely rot in Arkham for the rest of their lives. What kind of future would that be for me? I dropped the card onto the counter and headed back to the couch, I needed to escape reality for just a little while. Imagine my life somewhere else. I almost made it to the comfy warmth of the afghan again before another pounding on my door.
"Why god?" I looked up at my ceiling before trudging back to my wooden door. I unlocked everything but the chain and slipped it open.
"Delivery for Ms. Victoria." The delivery man was wearing a cheap velvet suit and holding a large square box.
"That's me hold on." I opened the door and he handed me the box as if it were made of glass. I signed for it before he bowed and walked off briskly. The door slammed behind me and I once again locked it. I walked right to my couch and sat down staring at the box. It was covered in shiny pink wrapping paper with a white lace bow. I carefully unwrapped it and found yet another box inside. I opened it and found yet another box. Soon I had at least ten boxes on the floor as I reached a small box that fit in the palm of my hand. I opened it and found a velvet box-shaped like an oyster. Opening it I found a small pair of earrings set with one purple and one green stone. I found a folded card taped to the top and pulled it out. It was wrinkled yet legible.
'You'd look good wearing my colors. ~J' There was small smudges of grease paint on the edges of the card and I just let it drop to the floor. I held the earrings out in front of me as if they burned. The box joined Edwards in the farthest corner of my kitchen.
I slumped back down onto my couch and just as I was just about to push play on my remote I heard a desperate pounding on my door. I just dropped my remote to the floor with a 'Thunk' and wrenched my door wide open. There was no one there. I stepped into the hall and felt something against my leg. Looking down I saw a dozen blue roses and a large box. I slid the box inside with my foot and picked up the flowers. I hoped that this would be the last time I locked my door for the day. I added the flowers to my kitchen, no card hidden within the buds, and walked back to pick up the box. It was a large box and I hoped it wasn't full of layers of boxes like the last one. I kicked a few of the empty boxes around before sitting down. It was wrapped with blue paper and a silk black bow. Opening it I found two plushies inside. A white crane with a golden beak and a black crow with a silver one. They were tied together with a blue strand of lace which attached to a large card. I pulled it free and opened it.
'Let these protect you while you sleep until I can. Sleep well baby.' I couldn't help it, my weakness was cute plushies so I carried them to my bed and set them next to the scarecrow. I really hoped they wouldn't keep sending me things when I was on my days off.
I broke down all the boxes and set them aside for recycling. I threw away the wrapping paper and set the ribbons aside in one of my kitchen drawers. I was so ready for that ice cream now. I flung open my freezer and found it empty. My head hung in sadness and I trudged to my room to slip into some jeans and a t-shirt. I half debated about wearing one of the thongs that Joker sent me before deciding against it. Grabbing my purse and keys I locked the door behind me and headed to my car.
I hit the automatic starter and fell to my knees as my car exploded into a giant fireball. For once my laziness with my car saved my life. I fell to my knees as one of my neighbors rushed to my side. She was a nice old lady who smelled strongly of cat pee. She held my shaking form until the police arrived and asked me about a million questions. My car blew up. Who would want me dead? The officer questioning me grabbed for me as my world went dark. I heard him call for help before my vision faded completely. My car just blew up. I could have died. I could really use that ice cream.