Lines had been drawn, and sides had been taken by nearly every one...
...except one man.
The silence of the ship was too much for Kaidan as he sat up in bed. He hadn't been sleeping for the past hour. He carefully swung his legs over the side of the bed trying to be as quiet as possible so as not wake up his wife, and rested his head into his hands as he thought. It was early in the morning, but sleep had eluded him at every turn. Yet for the first time in what seemed like years his head was clear enough to think, no migraines, no fatigue, he just wished it had been under better circumstances. He couldn't get the words out of his head.
...Coward...traitor...
Kaidan furrowed his brow as he thought. For years he had spoken these words to himself. These had been the very words he had used to define a person he thought he had known. A creature that that had come back and done the impossible. A force that had come to his rescue, when he didn't deserve it. A person he wanted desperately to believe in. A thing he treated with veiled suspect, even now after all the years.
He smiled sourly to himself. If it hadn't been for Miranda's constant insistence, I doubt I would have had allowed Shepard to be in the wedding party. That was too close for comfort for me...
His mind drifted away with the last thought...She was too close for comfort.
...The SSV K2...
"Specter Alenko. We have an incoming vessel through the Charon Relay an officer reported.
"What class?" Kaidan said. The K2's bridge was huge, but then again it was a Dreadnaught. It was very much a symbol as it was a weapon of War. Obviously the Council, the Alliance felt that a message had to be sent.
"Just a moment...What the? Its gone!" The signature isn't showing up on LADAR any more." The officer called out. Kaidan walked over to see what the man was looking at. It was more of a nervous reaction then anything useful.
The hair on the back of his neck began to rise. "How many anomalies did you pick up before it went dark?' He asked with a trained calm voice.
"Just one sir. At the time it was returned a Frigate class signature, but the return was too blurry to pick out the exact type." The officer returned.
Kaidan sighed. Its not a Reaper, and not a Collector Cruiser. Good.
"What do we have going on here Commander Alenko?" Asked a voice behind him.
It was Admiral Cain. The man was shorter than Kaidan, but projected a personality the size of Atlas. He was a career man and an Alliance man to the heart.
"Sensors picked up what seemed to be a ship coming out of the Charon Relay Admiral." Kaidan said still peering on the dark sensor screen.
"And?" Asked Cain.
"It appears to have been false positive because the anomaly was lost shortly after it was picked up." Kaidan replied.
"I see. Well no need to be chasing shadows. With the new LADAR upgrades even a Normandy Frigate won't be able to hide from us." Cain said confidently.
Kaidan's heart skipped a beat.
"We will be chasing a Ghost soon enough. The K2 will be underway in just a day." Cain said with a smile on his face. He looked at Kaidan with a scrutinizing eye. "Don't tell me that a big shot Specter is getting cold feet."
Kaidan returend a rebuking glance. "I just find it ironic sir."
"Humm?" Cain said with an interested look on his face.
Kaidan turned and walked towards a viewport and stared out in to empty space. "Shepard was made a Specter to take care of Saren. Now I was made a Specter to take care of Shepard..."
"Sounds like the Council is having a hard time keeping their people in line. All that power and no responsibility. Humpf. Looks like their choices are catching up to them."
"Yeah..." Kaidan replied nervously.
"Shepard was always a loose Cannon. Torfan, then stealing the first Normandy. And look at what has happened now because of her. Near open war with the Batarians." Cain said standing to Kaidan's left and looking out the same window. "I have no love for Batarians. But I always knew that given her history with them, something would happen."
"What about the Terra Nova incident with the Terrorist Balak? She let him go to save the trapped researchers. She just doesn't blindly kill every Batarian she sees." Kaidan offered.
Cain looked at him. "A simple lapse in the pattern. She was a newly minted Specter. So she wanted to make a good first impression. She should have just shot the son of a bitch though. We are still looking for him." He sighed.
"You really think she just destroyed the Bahak system out of revenge?" Kaidan asked.
"Do you have a better idea, Specter?" Cain winced in distaste at him. "Don't tell me your starting to believe in Shepard's imaginary Reapers."
Kaidan's face burned. He knew that the Reapers weren't just a figment of the mind. He had seen one. Listen as Shepard had spoken to one. But he also had to play the politics, and supporting Shepard's 'visions' and espousing that Sovereign was a Reaper, was a severe tactical error to put it mildly. Besides, she had betrayed him. She had betrayed the Alliance. She had chosen Cerberus...hadn't she? Can I trust anything she said back on Horizon?
"I didn't say that Admiral." Kaidan gritted his teeth. " I just know...er...knew Shepard. She just wouldn't have vaporized an entire star system because of a personal vendetta."
"Then would you care to explain why she went and joined Cerberus. A known terrorist organization?"
Bile boiled up in Kaidan's throat. But he said nothing aloud. Like I said, I thought I knew her...
Cain turned his attention back to the vista beyond him. " I still don't know what I'm surprised more of. The fact that you let Shepard go on Horizon, or that she let you do." Cain said airily.
Kaidan had been question unceasingly about Horizon. Not only by Councilor Anderson, who whole heartily supported him, but also by the Admirals and Generals staff. They on the other hand had been trying to pick him apart over it ever since. Admiral Cain seemed no different. Kaidan suspected that the Staff had supported his Specter candidacy as another test to see if he could get the job done. If he was truly loyal to the Alliance.
Kaidan swallowed hard. Now I know how Ash felt to always be under a microscope. But he steeled his resolve. But I will now allow myself to wallow in the feeling of being persecuted. That didn't help me in Brain Camp, it won't help me now.
"Well Admiral. It's my job to bring her in. And that is what I'm going to do." He responded.
Silence filled the bridge as the two continued to look out in to the cold void. The Stars shining back to them like ageless jewels.
"Sir! We have a hail on a secure channel!" The comms officer cried.
The two stalked over to him. "Where is the hail coming from? Have they identified themselves?" Cain asked.
"No Sir! But the call is on a secure frequency and 'they' are requesting a private communication with you and Specter Alenko."
Cain and Aklenko shot either other a surprised look. No one knew outside of the Council, and the Admirals and Generals staff knew that Kaidan was a Specter and on board the SSV K2.
"Put it through to the comm room." Cain ordered. "And put the K2 on full alert!"
"Yes sir!" The officer replied.
Off both Cain and Kaidan steamed to the Communications room. Alert sirens and calls going off like fireworks. "I don't like this." Cain said out loud. "First we get a reading on a Ghost ship, and now something contacts us by an Alliance secured connection."
Kaidan remained quiet, but he couldn't deign his own sense of foreboding.
They were greeted by the hiss of the communication room's doors at they quickly snapped open to let them in, and closed shut to restrict anyone else's access or view in.
Kaidan stood on the parameter. Just outside the viewing area of the communications array. Cain gave him a nod of approval. The Admiral took a moment to compose himself. To straighten his uniform, and steady his breath.
"Open the link." He commanded, and the order was followed with out a reply.
The holo sprang to life instantaneously before both Cain and Kaidan. The image that was relayed back to them. The image that stood before them stilled Kaidan's breath with shock. The person before them stood at 1.72 meters. The uniform it wore was crisp and rigidly cut, but held no official organizational markings. No sign of loyalty. It's collar hugged tightly to the wear's neck, and was predominantly black with white trim. Yet Kaidan recognized the white and red N7 embroidery that adorned the uniform's neck.
The figure's fiery red hair was as unkempt as it was groomed. It's olive toned face, one of pure business.
...But the eye's. The figure's emerald eyes. Her green embers contained something completely alien. One was a soft pale blue, the other was barely visible smoldering red. She might as well have been 3 meters tall, because her mere presence dictated it so.
"Shepard..." Cain said breathlessly.
"Good day Admiral Cain." She said. Her greeting was cold, unfeeling.
The Admiral straighten his stance. "Why have you contacted us? Where are you."
Her eyes narrowed on to the small man in front of her. "Where is Specter Alenko?" She asked. Her tone unchanging.
Cain scowled. "Why does it matter?"
"Because it's part of the reason why I contacted you. Why I came." She said acidly. Her eyes flared brighter. "As to where I am. I am surprised you haven't seen the Normandy just yet." Her tone was mocking. "Look to the port of the K2."
Cain's face flushed, and his eyes went wide as he rushed over to a command consol and hit the view port doors to open. As they rolled up, there stood the Normandy SR2 about 500 meters away flying silently along side the SSV K2 like a ghost ship.
Cain snapped his attention back to Shepard's who held a small smile of satisfaction on her face. "You...How..." He stammered, steeling a glance at Kaidan who looked on in equal disbelief. "Tell me why I shouldn't order the K2 to open up on you right now and vaporize you, you traitor!" He raged.
"Though I would love to see you try it, you would need firing solutions to do that Admiral. You know that. No shooting from the hip." Her tone again was icy and mocking.
Something's never change. Kaidan thought. Shepard's belligerence towards officials was one of them. But what are you? Your not her...
"But in any case. I'm here to turn myself in." She said serenely.
WHAT? Kaidan's mind caught. Just like that, no reason given...giving up without a fight?
Cain calmed somewhat after her statement. "Good. I'm glad to see that you can still understand reason." He quickly tossed his eyes to his right to look at Kaidan. "I will send over a boarding party ASAP. They will take you, you ship, and it's crew in to..."
"No. That won't be happening." She responded sharply. "I will come to the K2 and surrender my self to Specter Alenko only. My Ship and it's crew will depart this area as soon as my shuttle has left the docking bay. If you try to Engage the Normandy, it will defend itself and treat the K2 as hostile." Her words weren't a request. They weren't even a command. They were exactly how things would go. No bargaining.
"You are in no position to be giving orders Shepard!" Cain seethed. His face red with rage.
"And your in no position argue or bargain, Admiral." Her face still was neutral as was her tone, yet her eyes flashed again to strike her point home. "As I said I will take my own shuttle over to the K2, and surrender only to Specter Alenko."
"What even makes you think that Specter Alenko is even on the K2 Shepard!" Cain roared.
"How could he not be when he is standing to your right side?" She said calmly. "I will depart the Normandy in five minuets. I do hope that the K2 has fast elevators." Then the image went blank.
Checkmate You fool...You old fool. She had you from the beginning. Kaidan's mind slammed.
His eyes fixed again on the wall in front of him to the far wall. On it hung a Calamander wood plaque that held his gaze. On it inscribed in Gold and Platinum were the words:
For Exemplary Duty to the Systems Alliance
You Are the Example for the Alliance Military and the Hero We Need
We Thank You for Your Loyalty
We Thank You for Your Continued Service.
It had been given to him shortly after his induction in to the Specters. Though he appreciated it, he knew it's double meaning. It was a 'gentle' reminder. The Alliance meant everything to him. It had become his bedrock. His family. Kaidan knew the Alliance wasn't perfect. Mistakes had been made because, after all the Alliance was a Human venture; it wasn't intended to be perfect. But he would go forward in doing his best to making it better. And he couldn't complain that they hadn't treated him well. A biotic risen from the rank and file to command his own ship.
Yet why did Shepard leave? His mind whispered...
Miranda's soft velvet hands reached up and rested on his shoulders. "Are you ok?" She asked, her voice quiet.
Kaidan didn't lift his head, and he didn't answer as she pulled in closer wrapping her arms around his torso and laying her head on his back listening to the beat of his heart.
"Kaidan?" She spoke softly.
"Miri...Why does he follow Shepard so blindly?" Kaidan's voice was equally as soft.
"Who?" Miranda asked.
"Garrus..." Kaidan Exhaled.
"I doubt he follows her blindly Kaidan. He is just extremely loyal to her." Miranda released her hold on Kaidan, but still had her focus attuned to him wanting him to continue. "Where is this coming from?"
Kaidan got up, the clipping of his artificial foot sounding out of nature with the soft padding of his right. He was dressed in just a pair of gray gym shorts. "Its...its like every time I've seen him since Horizon years ago, he has this edge to him about me, and it gets worse when Shepard's around..."
"What do you mean by an 'edge about you'?" Miranda asked? She was sitting in the bed with her legs tucked up against her as she watch Kaidan pace back and forth.
"I dunno, It's like I am an outsider to him. It just really struck me with what he said in the Med Bay. He was willing to rush in to C-Sec headquarters to get Shepard back, no matter what would happen. Hell! Jacob and Kasumi had to bring him back unconscious!" Kaidan's voice rose.
"I'm sure he was just trying to blow off some steam..." Miranda said.
"No, he wasn't..." Kaidan stopped and looked back at her, than turned his gaze to the floor. "Would I be crazy to say that maybe the Council is doing the right thing here?"
Miranda was caught by total surprise by his statement. "What do you mean? Kaidan The Council practically kidnapped her right off the street!" Miranda said defensively, her eyes wide with shock.
"I know, I was there too!" Kaidan shot back furtively.
"Then how can you think that the Council is doing the right thing Kaidan!"
"You said it your self. Shepard has a colorful past." Kaidan said.
Her own words had come back to haunt her. She just looked at the back of her legs, a scowl forming on her face.
"The trial for Bahak never even got off the ground. And it was like all of the governments of the Galaxy just let it go..." Kaidan said softly
"She did what she had to, to delay the Reapers." Miranda said automatically.
"What good did it do? She destroyed an entire star system. She killed over 300,000 people! And for what?" He stormed.
"She saved the Galaxy! She bought us time!" She screamed back.
"But at what cost Miranda! Blood? The Citadel destroyed, billions dead! Earth Gone! And look what is happening now. The Galaxy is nearly on the brink of open civil war with itself!" He cast his arm to the wall as if he was pointing to the world beyond. "And all because..."
"Of her?" Miranda finished coldly, her face showing no emotion, her voice mono-tone. But her body was shaking with rage.
His gaze cast down to the floor again. "I...I don't know..." He looked back to Miranda who only turned her head from his eyes. Guilt wrapped around his stomach as quickly pulled on a gray tee shirt.
"I just need some fresh air." He said as he left towards the door.
"Kaidan, you let her go..." Miranda said barely able to control to her voice.
He stopped, but didn't turn back. "...And there are times I don't even know why..." He said.
[][][][][]
Garrus was in the hanger bay taking out some of his own frustration on a punching bag. It felt good to punch something and not to have to dodge the next strike. To just work for the pleasure of it.
Liara had cooled his thoughts, but sleep had only served to muddle them again. At least here he could push the thoughts of the trial and of the past few days out of his mind at least for the moment.
He imagined the bag being Sohmon as he beat it mercilessly.
You will pay for what you are doing to Shepard you barefaced bastard! He thought, baring his fangs as he landed another strike on the bag.
Hit after hit he landed on the bag, his focus glued to the object. Then his hearing caught the sound of another swinging away at his bag's twin.
Garrus broke away and watched Kaidan land a wild haymaker not caring if his form was solid or even if the hit was good. He was just swinging wildly.
He's angry. Garrus thought.
Kaidan looked over at him, a sour note painting his face. "Can I help you?"
"Humm...something eating you Captain?" Garrus asked.
"Eating me?" Kaidan lashed out with a heel kick into the bag. "No... everything is just fine. Just fine."
Garrus leaned back against his bag's frame and drank from a water bottle. "You sure could have fooled me." He goaded.
Kaidan lashed out another angry hit in to the bag then stopped. "Actually your right. Something is bothering me. Its you..." His voice was low and predatory.
Now we are getting somewhere. Garrus purred in his mind.
"Oh really. And just what about me?"
Kaidan stood still breathing heavily. "I don't get why you follow her..."
Garrus' eyes narrowed. "Follow who?" As if I didn't know.
Kaidan went back to working the bag. "You are blind. You just think she walks on water don't you. You don't for one second think that maybe Shepard is getting what had been coming to her?"
"What has Shepard done to deserve being abducted in the middle of the night and now put on trial?" Garrus' tone was one of caution. Kaidan sounded like a wounded animal being forced into a corner. Garrus' instinctively changed his stance to that of a fighter waiting for a blow to fall. "Kaidan get some rest. Your sounding like a lunatic right now."
"What has she done? What hasn't she done?" Kaidan turned and stalked up to Garrus thrusting his finger out at the Turian. "What makes you think she had any right to play God like she has, and get away with it?
"What the Hell are you getting at Alenko? She was forced to make the hard calls."
"Forced? She was forced to abandon Earth? Forced to scuttle the Citadel? Forced to destroy an entire star system? SHE made those choices by consent. No one had a gun to the back of her head when she did it! Hell! She even worked for Cerberus!" Kaidan shrieked.
Garrus' growled at him, sneering at him. "You weren't there Alenko, you don't know anything. You didn't even stand by her after Horizon when she came back."
"Oh and you know? You really think that I'm going to swallow the idea that she died and came back from the dead Garrus? That's a nice little story to cover her defection. She left the Alliance!" Kaidan roared pointing a finger at Garrus.
Garrus stormed forward on Kaidan, he wanted to take him and throw him, crush him. But he didn't. He looked down on Kaidan, letting his icy blue eyes tear in to him. Kaidan looked right back, not moving.
"Okay Kaidan. Since you think you know what happened; how about you tell me."
Kaidan was caught off guard, foundering, his eyes shifting back and forth. He hadn't thought that far...
"Cerberus must had had a ship tailing the first Normandy, and when the Collector's attacked, Shepard used it as a convenient cover to slip over to Cerberus." Kaidan said with unease in his voice.
Garrus just smiled at Kaidan. "You really think that Shepard would have turned her back on the Alliance that easily? It took much more. I'm sure your wife would love to hear about this theory of..."
"Leave my wife out of this!" Kaidan yelled and he struck Garrus to the right side of his face.
Garrus' head snapped to the left taking the force of the hit. His face seared with the pain of the impact, but to him it was nothing more then Childs play. I was wondering when that was coming...
Garrus looked right back at Kaidan and rolled his head and shoulders working out the sting. "Keep your wife out of this? I don't think so. She knows Shepard very well. Far better than you." His tone mocking. I want to keep him angry, get the root of the problem...
Kaidan went to strike again but Garrus blocked the punch with ease and slipped to the side. Kaidan wheeled forward awkwardly.
"Why am I not surprised Kaidan. Your letting your anger, your emotions do all the talking. You were a coward on Horizon, you were a coward on the K2, and your a coward now." He was waiting for Kaidan's next move.
"SHUT UP!" Kaidan roared and lashed out with a biotic kick aimed right for Garrus' chest. But Garrus in one deft move stepped to the side and grappled Kaidan's leg and hauled him in to a punching bag using his own momentum against him. Kaidan crashed to the floor heaving heavily.
The act was more about humiliation than about inflicting pain. More about establishing understanding than dominance.
"Get away from me! She never had the right to play God!" Kaidan said wincing as his lungs gasped for air.
"So you keep saying..." Garrus retorted and then he hunched down close to Kaidan. "This isn't about Shepard is it Kaidan. This is about you."
Kaidan looked at him his face twisted with rage, and tears.
"Go to Hell..." Kaidan burned.
Garrus' eyes flashed and he gave Kaidan a smirk. "Been there, got the tee shirt, but kept the trinket to prove it." He took a taloned finger and traced it down the right side of his face, and slowly past the blue glow of his cybernetic implant.
Kaidan wrapped an arm around the side of his body as he got up.
"She humiliated you didn't she. Not intentionally, and your too proud to admit it, but she did." Garrus purred.
"You fucking bastard!" Kaidan snarled and darted forward as he tried to belt Garrus again, but Garrus grabbed his arm and pulled Kaidan in to his knee. Kaidan yelped as the wind was knocked from him again and he was driven to his knees.
Garrus looked down at him. "So what was it? When she turned herself in to the K2? Your main purpose, your mission for being a Specter, gone."
"Shut up..." Kaidan winced.
Garrus looked down as Kaidan struggled to get up again. "Was it Calesten when she defied every order given to her to come and save you?"
Kaidan was on his hands and knees, sobs racked his body. "I said shut up!" He said weakly.
"Or was it Vermire, when she saved you over Williams? Ashley Williams became a hero, and you were left to be just another soldier..." Garrus' acidic words continued to work on Kaidan. He walked back looking at the crumpled form of the Ardennes Captain with pity in his eyes.
"I SAID SHUT UP!" Kaidan exploded and rushed at Garrus knocking him down. He piled on top of Garrus beating away at him, but his hits landed with barely anything but sadness and personal torment behind them.
"What makes you think you that you are RIGHT to stand with her? To support her? What makes you think she is RIGHT? WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT!" He yelled as he pulled at the Turian's collar screaming at him. "SHE DID THOSE THINGS! NOT someone else, NOT some evil twin. SHE DID!"
Then in an instant he was torn from Garrus and suspended in mid air by a stasis field. Garrus was pinned to the floor in the same fashion.
"I didn't hear an Officer on deck!" Came a siren's call, the Australian accent thick with rage.
All of the service men and women who had been watching the brawl suddenly crashed to attention.
In strode Miranda dressed in a crisp rigidly cut military uniform. It was dark navy and the collar wrapped around her neck. It held a vast array of ribbons and pendants on the left breast, and a Medal of Heroism encircled her throat. The outfit hugged her body, but embossed her with power more than beauty. With authority rather than attraction. Her raven black hair pulled sharply back in to a bun. Her face wore the look of pure ice.
Next to her was Liara wrapped in a forest green formal dress with golden stars that ran along the main seam and around the cuffs of the arms and what could be described at a hijab in human terms that covered her head. The fabric was the same color as her dress, but had small red jewels around the edge arranged in a four pointed star pattern.
Liara was controlling the stasis fields while Miranda paced around the parameter of the circle the service personnel had formed unbeknownst to either Garrus or Kaidan. A few swallowed hard as she passed them by, inspecting them.
"So, I guess every one here is gathered to see a 'friendly' little sparring match eh?" Her voice rang in the quiet hanger, and no one dared to speak. "Now hear this. If I find anyone who has placed any bets on this mess I'll have your ass slammed so fast in to the brig that it will be like going through a Mass Relay. Do you hear me?"
Again silence.
"DO YOU HEAR ME?" She screamed like a banshee.
"Yes Ma'am!" They responded in unison.
She looked at the two pinned combatants, first to Garrus. Liara instinctively dropped the stasis around him and he got up, rubbing the soreness in his neck. "Vakarian. Three people are here to see you in the conference room. Move." She quipped.
Garrus opened his mouth to ask who, but thought better of asking and just simply nodded. He drifted over to where Liara stood.
Miranda then turned to her husband who was held in midair. "As for you Captain Alenko. You have been seen as unfit for duty as acting Commander of the Ardennes due to emotional distress. "Again Liara took a unspoken queue from Miranda and released Kaidan who came crashing down to the deck.
He quickly regained his footing, but his face wore the expression of shock, but before he could say anything Miranda cut him off. "I am also recusing myself from being in Command of the Ardennes. The Captain and I have been subpoenaed to appear as witnesses in Shepard's trial. As such, Flight Commander Moreau is now the commanding officer."
"Yes Ma'am." Joker came over the comms, his tone was uncharacteristically formal and military.
Kaidan again looked as if he was going to argue, but Miranda's icy stare let him know it was better to just shut up. The Encircled personnel looked stunned.
Garrus lot out a snort and began walking back to the Elevator. People parted from his path as if by some unspoken order. But he stopped before moving much further from the open circle. "To answer your questions, Captain. I don't think Shepard was right. I know. I don't have the guts to make the choices Shepard did. Any of them. You don't either. I also don't deserve to stand with her. I am only at her side because she allows it."
He turned back to face the crowded room with a look of certainty painting his face. "There are only three people in this entire Galaxy who can say that they deserve to stand with Shepard, and they are all on this ship." He turned his gaze to Liara. "And only one deserves to stand with her and at her side." Garrus straightened his gaze then turned on his heel. With perfect military calm and form he walked over to the elevator and took it.
Author's Note: After a very insightful review I thought it was best to go back through this chapter and adjust somethings, and do a little bit of explaining. I could tell that Kaidan needed more refinement. He is an interesting character to work with because of his loyalty to the Alliance, his duplicity about Shepard, and the conflict that results from it. I won't give anything more away other then to say nothing is ever as it seems, and Kaidan will have a huge impact later on in the story. Yet for good or ill remains to be seen...