Housekeeping

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Crane/Scarecrow: 3

Riddler: 1

Joker: 1

No one gets any loving until it hits 10! Keep those votes coming in!

Thinking

Alternate Personality Speaking

Speaking

Chapter 16: Sleeping arrangements


Monday 2 AM

I was exhausted but refused to fall asleep. I was sitting on the couch between Joker and Crane they were fighting to see where I would be sleeping. Joker made up a game in which whoever I fell asleep on could take me to bed. Edward was glaring from the far end of the couch. He was fiddling with his cane as if he were trying to gather up his nerve to do something.

"Hey Bird boy." As Crane turned to look Edward smashed his cane into his face knocking him out instantly. He then pushed me off the couch and shot what looked like pepper gas into Joker's face. He began laughing hysterically and writhing around on the floor.

"What was that?" I had pulled myself off to the side to get away.

"Crane's nightmare gas, maybe it was a bad batch though." He looked down at the writhing cackling Joker and shrugged. "Looks like I've won." He picked me up and carried me to his room.

"No funny business Edward." I was so tired I could hardly keep my eyes open.

"Oh I cross my heart honey drop. Daddy's keeping it all ready for when we finally tie the knot." He tossed me into his bed then bolted the door closed. Somehow in less then an hour he'd drawn no less then eleven question marks on his walls with green paint. I burrowed under his covers and rolled into what I like to call 'the cocoon of warmth' and peeked out at him.

"Good night Edward." My eyes were peeking out from between the sheets. He had stripped down to his boxers and was standing there staring at the bare side of the bed.

"Doesn't daddy get any covers?" He pouted.

"Don't mess with my heat." I growled and curled up into a ball.

Monday 5 AM

I could feel Edward shivering and I peeked out of my steaming hot cocoon of blankets. I felt sorry for him so I unrolled them and slipped them over his shaking body. He then promptly wrapped them all around himself leaving me in the cold unforgiving world. I try to help him out and he outright steals all my hard earned heat. I was pissed. I snuck out of bed and unlocked his door. He didn't stir. I crept out of his room and made sure no one was in the living room. I then limped to Jonathan's room and tried his door, locked. I tried tapping softly. Common Jonathan I'm cold. I rattled the knob but I heard no sounds inside.

"Jonathan?" I tried whispering softly and tapping against his door. "Common please still be awake." Nothing. If I had a credit card I could have popped the lock in under a minute and then I could dive into his warm covers and promptly steal all his heat.

"Cold?" Joker's voice whispered from behind me. I whipped around and came face to face with a nearly naked Joker. He was soaking wet and a towel hung dangerously low on his hips. He had washed all his makeup off and was licking his lips suggestively.

"Nope I'm fine." I kicked Jonathan's door out of desperation, hard. I heard a thump from behind the door as if someone had just fallen out of bed.

"Looks like Crane locked you out." He was leaning closer to me now; I could smell the soap off his skin.

"Now why would he do that?" I kicked the door again and backed up as far against it as I could.

"Time for bed Mrs. J. It's about time I give you a toss around it." He leaned forward as if to kiss me.

Just before Joker could kiss me Jonathan's door whipped open and I fell back inside. "Hurry lock the door!" I was trying to kick it closed and Joker gave me a hurt look.

"Aww now don't be like that Mrs." The door promptly slammed into his face. I grabbed onto one of Jonathan's legs and clung for dear life.

"You save me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Oh you're so warm." I was practically grinding my face against his leg.

"V? You might want to stop doing that if you want to sleep tonight. Or walk tomorrow." I looked up at a very aroused, very injured Crow. I slid up his body and inched away.

"Sorry Jonathan." I looked at his injured face and saw that he'd removed his stitches sometime while I was sleeping. "You took them out yourself?"

"Yes we took them out. Now get in bed before we throw your ass in there and take it." He looked exhausted and had dried blood on his lips and nose. I quickly jumped into his bed and proceeded to make myself another 'heat cocoon' with his blankets.

"Oh they're still warm." I snuggled up in them snuggling the fabric and Jonathan's scent.

"Oh hell no. You'd better share." Crow jumped into the bed and started pulling the sheets off me.

"Nooo my heat!" I thrashed against his intrusion but had to submit when he began shaking me around like a doll. "You're no fun." I pouted and snuck under the blankets to use his chest as a pillow.

"V go to sleep, you move again and I don't care if Crane bleeds out I will take you myself." I froze mid nuzzle and clung against him until I fell asleep.

Monday 11 AM

The bed was moving, that or I was falling. I hit something soft and it wheezed under me. I peeked out of the covers and saw Crane looking up at me.

"Any reason why you decided to throw us both out of the bed?" His hands crept to my ass and squeezed. "Any reason?"

"Is your door locked?" I lifted an eyebrow.

"No but it can be."

"Too late." I whispered seductively as I leaned over him. "You need to be taught a lesson Mr. Crane."

"Oh do I now?" His eyes became glazed over with lust but before he could pull me down to kiss me I began to tickle him. He cried out and started to thrash wildly under me.

"This is for shaking me around like a doll this morning." I tickled him until he was blue in the face. I then bolted from his room and slammed the door behind me, holding it shut with all my strength.

"V I swear to all that is holy that when I get out of here you won't be able to walk for a fucking month!" He was trying to wrench the door open and I almost was pulled back into the room until I was suddenly floating up off the ground and pulled back. My world suddenly flew by in a blur as I was rushed to a darkened room and the door slammed shut.

"Finally got the little missus all to myself." The light clicked on and I was lying on a purple bed. I heard a click and looked up to see Joker, still clad in last nights towel, braced against the door. A loud pounding came from the other side; he just smirked and blew me a kiss.

"I think I'd much rather take my chances with Crow right now." I slid back against the bed until I was up against the headboard. He gave a pout and strutted right over to the bed and began crawling up it like some kind of animal.

"Looks like you missed your chance. Now it's my turn to play." I did the only logical thing I could think of. I pointed to his closet and screamed.

"Oh my god it's Batman!" His head snapped around so fast I leapt from his bed and had the door unlocked and open in under five seconds. I launched myself out of his room and slammed the door shut behind me.

"The Batman's found us!" Edward burst from his room in nothing but his boxers and hat. He was swinging his cane around wildly almost hitting Jonathan in the process. He was looking around as if the Batman was hiding in every corner.

Jonathan was standing there with a very pissed look on his face. His lip had reopened and blood was dripping down his sculpted chest in slow small droplets. I took my chances and hid behind him anyways. Joker burst from the room completely red faced and foaming at the mouth.

"Fucking bad joke sweetheart." He lunged at Jonathan who just stepped out of the way. I screamed and took off running, or I would have if I hadn't run straight into Edward who had been swinging his cane around still freaking out about the Batman joke. The cane hit my head with a loud 'crack' and I fell into blackness. I never felt myself hit the ground or Edward begin screaming in terror as Scarecrow and Joker lunged at him and dragged him away from my prone form.

Thursday 8 AM

My head was killing me. I reached up to touch it and met with bandages and a sharp snap of pain down my spine. I pried my eyes open and found myself lying on Joker's purple bed. The room was empty and the door was wide open. I tried to sit up and found myself dressed rather oddly. I had a blue t-shirt on with a scarecrow doodled on the front, purple Capri pants, and green toe socks with question marks all over them. I staggered out of bed and wandered into Jokers bathroom to see what happened. My eye twitched when I saw that not only his sink but his shower were dyed green. He had painted a giant smiley face on his toilet seat and his mirror had doodles all over it. I took a moment to bottle down my anger and I stared at myself in the mirror.

"Oh dear lord I look dead." My hair was matted with blood and so messy it would take me a week to fix it. I was so pale that I was nearly glowing and my eyes had dark rings under them. I looked like the bride of Frankenstein. I closed my eyes and slowly backed out of the bathroom. I tried to remember what had happened last when an image of Edward looking scared out of his wits flashed into my mind. I zombie walked out of Jokers room and into Edwards. It was empty. I made my way down to Jonathan's, empty as well. I slowly walked all over the warehouse and didn't find hide nor hair of any of the men.

I stomped my foot in anger and heard a dull thud, an empty sound. I looked down at the carpet I was standing on. I pulled it back and found a small trap door, I opened it expected to see yawning darkness in front of me. Instead I saw a neat set of stairs lit all the way down. I followed them making sure I didn't fall, I pulled the door back shut behind me. I didn't hear the screaming until I was fully down the stairs. There was a door right in front of me and I could hear someone screaming and begging for mercy inside. I didn't recognize the voice crying out for help. I opened the door and saw a man rolling around on the floor screaming that he was covered in bees.

"I'm allergic to bees, oh god they're everywhere stinging me everywhere!" He rolled around and banged his head against the floor until it began bleeding.

"That's not all you fear is it? What about those snakes you've just rolled into?" I heard crows voice from the corner and turned my head. He was wearing a burlap mask and staring intently at the man on the floor as he now screamed about snakes shooting bees from their mouths.

"Crow?" My voice was soft but he still heard it and turned to face me. I stared into the burlap mask and he stared back for what seemed like hours. He pulled the mask from his face and I was once again looking into icy blue eyes. He looked like hell. He had rings darker then mine under his eyes, he hadn't shaved in days and his lips were dry and cut open. His hair was practically matted to his head and I'm sure he'd been wearing that shirt for days, it was soaked with sweat and clung to his body.

"V?" Crane was back in control and rushed to my side grabbing both of my arms as if I were about to run fleeing. One hand moved up to cup my chin and was shaking as he slid his thumb over my lips. "V there was so much blood, so much." His voice was soft and I almost didn't hear it over the screaming of the man from the floor.

"What happened?" I rubbed my hand over his cheek feeling the rough stubble scrape against my skin. I pulled him from the room and closed the door behind us.

"We all freaked out when you started yelling that Batman was here. Edward wasn't fully awake and nearly cracked your head open with his cane. Joker and I were going to beat him senseless until we saw how bad you were bleeding." He gently stroked a hand over my bandages. "Joker flipped out, more then he ever has before. He was gone by morning and last I heard he was calling out the Batman and Harvey Dent. Edward is still around somewhere but he's mostly been making some kind of trap to kill the Batman once and for all. We thought that if he was gone you would come back to us." He fell to his knees and buried his face in my chest. His breathing was heavy and he was holding me so close I hurt.

"You went back to being Scarecrow full time?" I eyed the burlap mask on the floor by his leg.

"V you were out a long time." He looked up at me almost in tears.

"What day is it?"

"Thursday."

"So I was out only a few days?" He looks this bad from a few days without me?

"V, you've been gone for over a month. We could rob only so many hospitals and blood banks before we got desperate."

"A month?" I fell to my knees in front of him as my world swam a bit.

"I'm sorry V." His voice was so soft and cracked a bit.

"Jonathan?" Where had the world gone to while I was unconscious?

"Yes V?" He looked afraid as if I were going to disappear at any moment.

"We need to find them before they kill themselves." I rested my forehead against his as he held me.