So many black and white
Are made to be so blue
We've all got our wars to fight
But I won't fight with you
If I could just get your attention
I'd never let it go
Until you've felt what I am gonna say....
-Butch Walker, "Don't Move"
The first thing Sakura noticed when she regained consciousness was that her lids felt unusually heavy, like someone had placed weights at the end of them. Secondly, she realized she had been covered with a blanket, its weight lying across her limp limbs and body. And thirdly, she realized dimly that everything seemed foggy. Even her thoughts seemed oddly out of body, as if far away. She could hear voices coming at her.
"Do you think she's awake?" a man asked, his deep voice thick and nasal as if he had a cold.
"Atsushi, go back to work. You know captain will be mad if you dawdle again," another man said with gentle chiding. "Now don't give me that look. I'll tell you when she's awa—she's waking up! Captain!" the man alerted.
Sakura blinked blearily before cracking open her eyes. Her head hurt, and she still felt a bit woozy. Before she could stop herself, she quietly muttered, "Where am I?"
A thick-set, round man with black hair smiled at her, his small, black eyes peering out of his tan face with child-like excitement. He looked about thirty. "You're our captive!"
The man before her shook his head to himself before placing a hand on his chest. "Please forgive my friend's rudeness, but what he says is true. You are our captive, and I apologize for Atsushi—that's him over there," he said pointing to the thick-set man who waved, "he was a bit rough when he kidnapped you after you scratched him."
Sakura tried to focus her eyes to the speaker, gathering as much light from the small fire behind him as she could. The fog over her mind was starting to ebb, but a dull throbbing pain at the back of her head alerted her to what "a bit rough" might have been. Judging by the darkened sky, it had been a few hours since she had passed out, but she could only remember bits and pieces of why she had passed out. She had been folding clothes in the bedroom when she felt a breeze enter the room and someone come up behind her. Her first instinct was to fight, but with the baby limiting her movement, she could only struggle. She remembered scratching her attacker—that must have been when she scratched Atsushi—and then a strong-smelling cloth cover her nose and mouth before she blacked out.
"Chloroform," she said to herself.
The dark-haired man before her nodded. "Yes, Atsushi used chloroform," he said and Sakura peered closer at the man before her.
"Sai…?"
The man blinked. "No, my name is Kakeru." But despite what he said, he did bear a striking resemblance to Sai, with the same dark eyes, thin lips, and facial shape. The only differences were that his skin color wasn't as deathly pale, his hair was longer and shaggier, and he was capable of emoting more. He couldn't have been much older than her. "Miss, are you alright? You seem a bit ill."
At the thought of illness, Sakura immediately remembered the baby. Had the baby been injured? She must have vocalized these worries because the man named Kakeru looked up in distress.
"Captain—Hisoka-san, I don't feel comfortable with this! You never told us we would be kidnapping a pregnant woman!" He turned his head to his rounded companion, who was in a similar state of distress. "Did you know she was pregnant?"
"I thought she was just fat!" Atsushi cried out, a few shades paler than before. His teeth began chattering, and bringing his fingers up, he began biting at his nails.
"Atsushi, stop that," said a deep voice. Looking up, Sakura watched a figure emerge from the shadows. She hadn't even sensed him. Had he been here the whole time?
The figure leapt down from the shadows of the tree branch he had been standing on, and Sakura studied him. He was two inches shorter than Kakashi's height with short black hair with medium build and thin dark eyes. Those eyes glanced at her from their corners before flicking back to the nervous Kakeru.
"Just to tell you, Kakeru, yes I did know she was pregnant. You should realize that in the world of shinobi, everyone is a potential target. You should know that entirely too well, correct?"
Kakeru nodded sadly, deep in the world of his memories. Hisoka nodded and strolled over to Sakura. She nearly flinched at the commanding air he gave off. "Hatake Sakura, age 20, formerly known as Haruno Sakura. Member of Konohagakure. Jounin rank. Medical ninja and apprentice to the Hokage, Lady Tsunade. Married to Hatake Kakashi and pregnant with his child, correct?"
Sakura stared down at floor, knowing he was not looking for confirmation from her because he already knew it was her. As she predicted, he did not press her for an answer.
"What do you want from me?" she asked, annoyed.
Hisoka stared down at her with an unreadable gaze, and briefly, she thought of Sasuke. "You should know very well how hostage situations work. We kidnap a loved one and give demands in exchange for your return. Your husband should be preparing to leave as we speak." At her angry gaze, he returned her stare and gave a small, exasperated sigh. "It's nothing personal, I hope you understand. We were part of the group that Isao was part of, and while I do not condone his behavior towards you, you should know you killed a great deal of my team. Atsushi, Kakeru, and I are the only ones left and having cut off our commodities, we feel a bit of payback is in order."
His explanation finished, he walked away towards the fire, pausing a few feet away from her. "And don't think you can escape. I've already given you a poison that will keep your chakra levels at a low level. You only have enough for your body to function without collapsing from exhaustion. And it's as Kakeru says, if you behave, I will not harm you." And with that, he continued on his path.
"Wait."
Hisoka paused and turned to look over his shoulder.
"If you're getting revenge for your fallen teammates, why not kill me? I killed them too," Sakura asked.
"Fool. Aside from the bounty on his head, it is a matter of pride that I kill Hatake Kakashi," he replied. He turned his head away from her. "Besides, even I would not lower myself to kill a pregnant woman."
And with that, he stalked off towards the campfire, leaving Sakura as confused as she was when she awoke.
It was eleven in the morning, and like every morning, the Hokage of Konohagakure could be found sitting at her desk filling out the seemingly endless reams of paperwork that towered her desktop. As she read over the forms, giving her signature when it was needed, Tsunade wondered why she had so much paperwork. Sure, there were treaties and propositions to look over, along with her other duties managing the hospital, but did they have to be so long? Trees were dying for these damn things! And despite Yamato's ability to raise trees from the ground like her grandfather, there was a limit to what the man would do.
A knock at the door interrupted her mental tirade.
"Come in," she said as she scanned over the current document before her, a proposal by Ibiki for more funding. Apparently they needed more money for a new sink in the bathroom as well as some money to replace some missing pipes in the plumbing. She wasn't even going to ask.
"Tsunade-sama," the shinobi before her bowed. She blinked and took off the pair of reading glasses perched at the end of her nose.
"Kakashi, what a surprise. You've never bowed before and—"
"I want to be on the retrieval team," he said firmly.
Tsunade sighed. "Cut right to the chase, huh? Fine. My answer is no."
"But, Tsunade, I—"
"No," the blonde woman said resolutely. Seeing the agonized look in his eye, she softened her expression. "I'm sorry, Kakashi, but you know our policy. Under no circumstances can we allow spouses or family members on rescue missions. I didn't even allow Hinata on the mission to find Neji and Tenten."
"But—"
"No means no, Hatake. You know we have these policies for a reason. When things become personal, you become a danger to the mission and the team, and I will not tolerate insubordination."
"But you have Sasuke and Naruto on the team. Even Lee is on the team."
"Because I know they can control themselves. They might have personal ties to Sakura, but I know that when the time comes, they'll keep it together. I can't be sure about you."
His fist suddenly connecting with her desk shook the table, causing Tsunade to jump in her seat; the tabletop rippled, then splintered and cracked with his force. "Damn it, Tsunade. Let me go!"
Kakashi had held out as long as he could. He knew this wasn't normal behavior—that at any other point in his life, he would've been angered, but he would've been able to keep his anger in check—but that was then. This was now and now, love had made him irrational; fear had made him desperate. Her eyes met his, measured his frantic gaze calculatingly, and sighed quietly to herself.
"If you're that desperate to go, go ahead—don't ever say that I never did you any favors—but if I find out you did anything to endanger this mission, I will have your rank stripped from you as soon as you set one foot back in the village."
Reaching under the desk, she pulled out a scroll from a drawer by her leg, "here's the mission scroll. They're still getting ready so you can get the debriefing from one of the members. Your job is to help Kiba track Sakura and offer backup. Genma is your team captain. You leave tomorrow morning. Any questions?"
"No," Kakashi quickly answered, heading towards the door before stopping to pause and look back. "Thank you, Tsunade," he said gratefully.
Tsunade grunted, head already ducked towards her paperwork. Then, when she was sure that Kakashi was out the door and out of range to hear, she snorted to herself, "Idiot." But there was a smile on her face.
"Kakashi, slow down!"
The silver-haired man ignored the Inuzuka boy, continuing his demon pace as he soared through the tree limbs. The shaggy-haired man cursed. "Genma, aren't you supposed to be mission captain? Do something about him!"
Genma frowned. Though it was true he was mission captain, Genma also knew there was no chance in hell Kakashi would listen to him. It was already their second day of travel and Kakashi had made it clear he was there solely to get Sakura back. Genma didn't mind. Kakashi had always been a bit of a lone wolf, group mission or not, but it was a pain for him to be giving orders when he knew he had no right to. He'd been the one to set rest times, and when they made camp and woke up. He was the entire reason Genma hadn't even had the time to stick his trademark senbon in his mouth when they headed out for the morning. He was unrelenting in his demands for faster speed and further distances, especially when Kiba has shouted that they might have had a possible lead earlier. It was only when Genma reluctantly pulled rank that Kakashi listened.
Now, he understood Kakashi's anxiousness to find Sakura. There was no knowing of what those people were doing to Sakura. Pregnant or not, male missing nin had fewer scruples when dealing with women. He knew Kakashi was worried about Sakura—they all were—but Kakashi's worry seemed to be on a whole other level. It made sense since they were married, and Tsunade had told Genma earlier to expect Kakashi forcing himself into their mission squad, but he knew he was supposed to be the one in charge. He didn't want to cite Kakashi on insubordination, but he'd have to if Kakashi did anything to jeopardize their safety or Sakura's safety, but he knew the man was desperate. Almost as desperate as Naruto when he was chasing after Sasuke, if not more. That being said…
"There's no talking him out of it, Kiba. Just stay near the back with Lee. Sasuke, Naruto, keep an eye on him and make sure he doesn't do something stupid. I don't want Tsunade to have a reason to drop his rank."
Watching the two nod, they quickly leapt ahead, keeping pace just a few meters behind their former teacher, who seemed completely unaware of his followers. Kakashi's field of vision was merely the forest in front of him and the blurring scenery in his peripheral vision. He could feel his heart thudding in his chest; his throat was screaming for air and water, but he pushed forward, despite his screaming, aching muscles. He had barely slept at all last night, but he'd get through. Pain was nothing; even death was nothing if he got to see her again.
Dimly, he could hear the shouts of his teammates, but he kept pushing on. An image of her smiling flashed before him, and he reached out for her and swore he could smell the lingering scent of her jasmine-scented lotion and feel the fabric of her dress in his hand.
And then, the mirage vanished. Sakura was gone, leaving for his view the blurring forest scenery, a hated reminder of the many miles between them and he cursed under his breath as the thought of her being hurt flickered through his mind. How was she doing, he wondered to himself. Were they alright? Naturally, the thought of them not being alright followed and he found his heart clenching painfully tight in his chest. It was slightly harder to breathe now as well and he found the more he lingered on his thoughts, the more the fear coiled up from his stomach to his lungs. The scenarios were unbearable.
'I'm coming, Sakura. Wait for me.'
And with the scent of white jasmine flowers in his nose and the feel of cotton in his hand, he pressed chakra to his feet and pushed on.
Humans can adapt anywhere. Sakura knew it from both books and real-life experiences. Suna was a desert and yet the people thrived there, and so she could too as a hostage.
In the three days they had been traveling together, Sakura had picked up the routine. Atsushi woke up first in the morning, going to look for food for the camp. Next, Hisoka woke up, checking the perimeter of the camp and the traps as Atsushi came back with breakfast; Kakeru was always the last to wake up.
After breakfast, they would travel. Hisoka told her they were going to the meeting point at the Grass-Fire border, and they would travel for an hour before they would stop for her to rest. Pregnancy had started setting its full brunt on her body: the problems sleeping, the swollen feet, etc., but they would always stop for her—as their bargaining chip, she supposed they had to. Even when they couldn't afford to stop, Hisoka would have Atsushi carry her until she could walk again.
When they stopped for the night, the routine remained the same as she estimated it always had been. Kakeru gathered firewood and started the fire; Atsushi looked for food; and Hisoka would check the perimeter and set traps. Even with the addition of Sakura, the routine had changed little. The only difference was that Kakeru had help making the fire and preparing the food and that there was one more person to watch when doing guard duty.
Atsushi took first watch during guard duty. He always had the shortest shift because he fell asleep so easily, and sometimes she would find him nodding off in the tree and nearly fall out of the branches. Kakeru took second or third watch depending on the day, but his shift was always the longest. He'd become quieter since Hisoka's reminder that everyone was a target—she could only guess that his family was a victim of that rule—but she didn't need him to talk to know he was a nervous man. Polite, but incredibly nervous. Sudden, unnecessary movements startled him, and strange noises would make him send kunai flying into bushes. It was a useful trait to have when doing guard duty, she supposed, but because of that, she tried very hard not to do anything to set him off. She tried hard not to do anything to set anyone off, what with the baby and all.
Hisoka's shift always spanned the most difficult hours, from midnight until four. She saw him on occasion during his shift when she was drifting in and out of consciousness. He'd always be staring off in a high tree branch half-covered in shadows and she'd wonder what he was thinking about. Despite the three days she'd stayed with them, she had yet to decipher his unreadable gaze. Whenever she tried, she'd only see her reflection and his blank gaze staring back at her. It was like staring into a mirror and frankly, it was getting annoying. She told him that on their fourth night.
"Your parents should be proud of themselves. They named you quite accurately. You're very reserved," she observed, annoyance coloring her tone.
"My parents could only guess at what my nature would be. I doubt they expected me to become the leader of a band of nuke-nin," was Hisoka's calm reply before gracefully jumping down to stoke the small campfire. That was another thing she didn't like about him. He was always so calm and collected. It was like someone combined the stoic natures of Sasuke, Sai, and Kakashi and poured into one man. It was annoying, and unnerving. Even with four days of observation, she had yet learned to read into him. Maybe that's why she was lashing out.
"Shouldn't you be keeping watch in the tree?" she asked when he sat next to her. She knew she was pushing her luck with these smarmy comments of hers, but she knew Hisoka was smart enough to know that with her dead, there would be no bargain. Plus, she could always blame it on her pregnancy. Swinging hormone levels were bound to let a few comments slip out that weren't supposed to. Idly, she supposed that she should be panicking more, but she had been kidnapped on more than one occasion and by distracting herself, she could keep her wits about her better.
Hisoka turned to look at her from the corner of his eye. "My traps have got it covered." To prove his point, he picked up a small pebble the size of a grain of rice and showed it to her before tossing it deep into the bushes, only for a resounding snap to echo back, causing Kakeru and Atsushi to wake up and blink blearily around. Hisoka waved them back to sleep.
"I repeat: my traps have got it covered. Unlike your teammates in Leaf, we don't have any fancy kekkei genkai to save us when trouble comes," he said with an amused glimmer in his eye. He was probably laughing at her attempts to ruffle his feathers. "Any other burning questions or are you going to just try burning holes in my head until you fall asleep?"
She folded her arms over her chest with a huff, just managing to keep the words 'jerk' from flying off her tongue. A chuckle entered the air and she almost had to do a double-take to make sure she hadn't misheard the sound. Hisoka had…laughed?
Sakura tried looking at Hisoka, trying to catch a trace of anything that would verify the stoic man had laughed, but she could only see the side of his jaw. He was turned away, and following his gaze, she saw him staring at Atsushi and Kakeru, a fond look in his eyes.
"You really care about them, don't you?"
Hisoka turned to her, a half-smile on his lips. "It's why I take the worst shift for night watch and set the traps. They're good men, though."
At the dubious look she sent him, he smiled a bit wider.
"I'm serious. Atsushi wouldn't have hit your head against the bookshelf if you hadn't scratched him in the face," he said with a slight chuckle, "but in all seriousness, they are good men. They've just had it rough. We all have. Atsushi was put in a freak show in the Land of Tea when I found him and Kakeru…his wife and children were caught in a fire meant for him."
"He…was married?"
Hisoka nodded. "Surprised, right? Despite the way he looks, he's actually 29."
Sakura nodded. So that's why he'd been so wary about her kidnapping…
"You're shivering."
Sakura looked up. "Huh?"
"You're shivering," Hisoka repeated. Looking down, she realized that she was.
"I'm not surprised. I was kidnapped while wearing a summer sundress," she said matter-of-factly. Hisoka grunted and took off his brown traveling cloak.
"Here," he said, bundling her in it.
"Aren't you going to be cold?" she asked, but her hands were already greedily clutching at the fabric and she just stopped the satisfied hum as her body drank in the heat still trapped in the cloak. Hisoka, despite his cold exterior, was actually quite warm.
'Kind of like Kakashi…'
"I'll be fine," he said motioning to his body. Looking over his clothing, he was right. Long brown pants and a black long-sleeved shirt under his brown short-sleeve. Even if he had a slightly stupid amount of belts around his waist—why five buckles around your waist?—he would be perfectly warm. "We nuke-nin have to be built of tougher stuff, anyway. This is nothing," he said with a dazzling, wolfish smile. No wonder he didn't smile often. His already-good looks and that smile were lethal, but…
"What about you?" she asked.
"What about me?" he asked, carelessly stretching out against the tree.
"You've told me about Atsushi and Kakeru, but what about you?" she asked, pulling her knees to her chest from under the cloak. Hisoka's expression became grim.
"What about me?" he replied tonelessly, unwilling to meet her gaze. Sakura pushed on regardless.
"Why did you become a missing nin? You told me about Kakeru and Atsushi, but why did you become one? Is this really the life you want?"
"Of course not!" he replied angrily, eyes flashing with rage as he turned to her. "I wanted—I wanted—"
Hisoka turned around abruptly, raked a hand through his hair and sighed heavily. "Never mind," he said quietly. Turning around, he forced his lips into a reassuring smile. "You should go to sleep," he told her.
"But I'm not…"
And before she could even finish her sentence, he'd wrapped the cloak tightly around her and she fell fast asleep, not even feeling Hisoka's fingers as he brushed away the hair from her face or seeing the gentle, adoring smile on his face before he leapt back into the trees.