Housekeeping

Thoughts

Sexy Scarecrow Voice

Speech

A/N: Hey guys hope you like this next to last chapter. And no I'm not ending the series I'm starting a sequel so squeal with joy! Let me know what you think as I prepare Gotham for its newest Rogue!

Chapter 30: The Joys of Having Twins/Turning Rogue

I can't believe I'm already two months along. I sighed and poked at my stomach starting to see the swelling where my babies were growing in me. I was still having my bouts of morning sickness and craving anything Joker cooked. The guys were running around like headless chickens trying to start getting things ready for the babies. I sighed again and stalked to the kitchen to try and find some food before anyone got home. Sure in the past couple of weeks the guys were playing nice but I don't know how long that would last.

I plopped down at the table with a giant container of last nights 'Joker Potato Soup' and dug in. I don't know why the guys don't eat this with me it's friggin delicious. But then again that could just be the babies talking. Edward actually turns green when he tries to eat with me and Jonathan won't eat anything but salads lately. I hear a scraping sound coming from my dish and I look down. Oh great I just ate another gallon of soup. I'm gonna end up a friggin whale at this rate. With a groan I stood up and dumped the container into the sink.

"Now where could they be? Usually Jonathan and Edward have stopped in by now to check on me." I looked up at the clock in agitation, lately I've been getting kind of cranky off and on. Must be a hormone thing I guess. I tapped my nails on the counter top for another ten minutes before I sighed and walked into the living room. I collapsed onto the couch with a frown and clicked on the TV. We'd gone through several since the news of the impending bundles of chaos. I turned to the news and I stared blankly at the screen in shock.

"This is Brenda Starr with Gotham this evening! Today was a great accomplishment in the life of Batman and his side kick Robin! Earlier today they caught not just one but three of Gotham's nefarious Rogues!" Pictures of my Edward, Jonathan and Joker flashed up on the screen and I felt nauseous. I nearly went boneless and dropped the remote on the couch next to me as I tried to concentrate on the news. I wanted to stab something, or make it scream. Hell I'd start throwing out Riddles at this point. With a sniffle I looked back at the TV. "All three Rogues are safely back in Arkham Asylum which recently has been reopened as accounts of all patients have come back accurate. The streets of Gotham are safe once more all thanks to that dramatic crime fighting duo…" I threw the remote at the TV so hard that it blew up.

"How the hell did they get caught?" I wrapped my arms around my stomach protectively trying to shield my babies from my own anger. Was this my fault? Did the babies throw the men off their game? Had I made them soft and dulled their edges? What was I going to do now? I stood up and started pacing trying to pull ideas up to save them. I wasn't super crazy like Joker, I couldn't just rush in and stab or blow people up to get my way. I wasn't super smart like Edward; I couldn't sneak in or hack them out. The only thing I had of Jonathan was Scarecrow and his fear gas. I blinked for a moment before bellowing at the top of my pissed off mommy lungs.

"SCARECROW!" I swear that the room echoed and I had smoke coming out of my ears. The bruise on my chest throbbed once then twice before I saw a straw hat peek out at me from around the corner. At the sight of me crying and holding my stomach his eyes widened and he was wrapping me up in his arms tightly.

"Oh hey honey. Um…did you see the news today?" He rocked me slowly from side to side and my anger melted. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his straw chest and just started bawling my eyes out. "Oh don't cry my little scream queen. Please calm down. I'll think of something."

"I'm going to be pregnant and alone." I wailed before sniffling and looking up at him. My moods today were freaking me out one moment I was depressed and the next I wanted to stomp something. "Why the hell did they get caught?" Scarecrow looked confused and sat me down at the couch before rubbing my back.

"Relax V it's the pregnancy hormones making you a little crazy. Calm it down before the babies get riled up." He licked his burlap lips and took of his straw hat and placed it on my head. "Now calm it down. Straw daddies here and he's going to try and make it all better."

"Okay I think I've calmed down." I felt better actually. I really hoped I wasn't like this the entire pregnancy; the guys would be terrified of me. "What are we going to do? I want my men back." I sighed and leaned up against his shoulder.

"V you're pregnant. I'm not letting you rush head long into danger and risk loosing our little bundles of hellish joy." He rubbed my stomach and gave me a firm glare.

"They're my husbands Crow. I'm not going to sit around helpless while they're back in that hell hole." Crow chuckled and nuzzled against my neck.

"Oh V I love it when you seethe. Jonathan and I are making plans off and on. It'd be more often but they've given him those damned drugs again to muffle my voice in his head." He sighed and tugged on his noose out of anxiety. "I don't like it when he starts thinking on his own. Kid needs an extra head on his shoulders to keep him balanced."

"That's it Crow. I'm going Rogue and finding a way to save my men." I huffed before sighing and biting my lip. "But I don't have an outfit or a special power. If Batman showed up I'd probably run away screaming and hide in another vent."

"That's always a good thing my little scream queen. You seriously don't want to get wrapped up in the Gotham underworld though. You're too soft and squishy they'd eat you alive." Crow sounded like he was scolding me and I looked up at him after a moment.

"I'm doing this Scarecrow. Screw Batman. If I have to blow up half the city to save the men I love I will. I'm going to start brainstorming now about an outfit, then a name…" I trailed off as a roll of nausea hit my stomach. "Oh god I'm gonna throw up." I ran to the nearest bathroom and once again greeted the porcelain throne with a bow.

"I'm pretty sure random bouts of nausea and pregnancy hormones won't scare off Batman sweetheart." Crow rubbed my back softly and I sighed. "I've got to try and get back to Johnnie boy now. If I hear that you've so much as left this house I'm going to give you the spanking of a life time." He took his hat back and gave me a half hearted smile. "Oh hell you know we'd both like it. Just stay safe for the babies sake okay V? Remember Scarecrow loves you." With that he was gone and I sat on the bathroom floor thinking up ways to kill the Batman.

"Okay I've got a name but now I just need an outfit. Maybe something armored so I'm not so squishy." I was clicking around online trying to find an outfit for my new rogue persona. I'd decided on the name Mystery frankly because I couldn't think of anything that would go with all three guys. I didn't look like a Jester or a Crow. With a sigh I leaned back in my chair and wondered how the guys came up with their outfits. I rubbed my stomach absentmindedly while my mind drifted off. Going back into Arkham as a housekeeper was out of the picture. I didn't know if Larry had any friends still inside and those chemicals would surely hurt my babies.

"What colors should I even use? Edward's more of a green, Joker's purple and Jonathan's well I'd probably say more of a red or is he maybe blue?" I sighed and rubbed my eyes as I'd been sitting here for over three hours trying to think of a basic color scheme to begin my outfit. I had some weapons that the guys left behind that I could use. Joker left behind some of his knives, Edward left one of his canes and some of his sleeping gas, and Jonathan had left behind a small stash of his fear toxin. I was quickly gnawing through a pencil trying to get my creative juices flowing.

I threw the pencil across the room with a groan and pulled myself out of the chair and rubbed my ass. I stalked to the kitchen and raided the fridge for some orange juice before pacing. I needed a look to go with my new name. I needed a look then maybe some goons…wait goons! All three men had some goons left out of Arkham right? But would they work for the wife of their bosses? I plopped down in a chair and held my head in my hands. What am I going to do?

"Cat girl outfit? Nope that's been done. Nothing skimpy, something with armor. Hmmmm." I was bent over a drawing pad trying to draw something now. I didn't want a skirt so I stuck with pants, well kind of like tights that look like pants. Maybe some shorts over the tights? "Hey I know purple tights with green shorts and a green top with purple sleeves!" I quickly drew it down and wondered how I would incorporate red into it. "Maybe blood red armor?" A wicked grin crossed my lips as I drew red armor over my outfit. "And then a symbol." I drew a big green question mark on the back of my outfit drawing with a smile. I had a first draft of my outfit I felt so giddy.

"Now which contact is his goons?" I was going through Edward's phone trying to find a contact for some of his goons and I was getting frustrated. He had names but nothing that screamed 'Goon or Thug'. "Maybe I could put a riddle out in the paper, wait can any of Edward's thugs even answer a simple riddle?" I hung my head and groaned as I felt a headache coming on. Was it always this stressful trying to plot like this? Wait a second, I'll just go back through his call logs and call the two goons he called to drive me to the clinic! I nearly danced at my epiphany and I went back through his calls until I found one number that matched up. "Well, well Zachary Stevens lets hope you're not locked up because you're all I've got." I dialed the number and held the phone to my ear as my nerves started shaking me to the bones.

"Boss?" A nervous male voice filled the phone and my eyes lit up in joy. I'd found a thug! But what do I say?

"Actually this is the Boss's old lady." I thought he'd hung up on me before he spoke again.

"Uh, hello?" He sounded confused and I bit my lip.

"I'm trying to round up some of Riddler's minions and you are going to help me." Okay I sounded firm right? I'm not going to let them know I'm freaking out right now.

"Is that so?" He was starting to sound cocky, time to break his balls.

"Oh so I should tell Riddler that you've all abandoned his wife?"

"Damn honey calm it down. How many of us do you need and where should we go?" He sounded like a kicked puppy.

"Come to the house where you picked me up and bring four other guys. I don't want the bat getting curious."

"Alright I'll round up some boys and show up. Hope you know what you're getting into little lady." With a click he hung up and I jumped off the bed and danced around Edward's room. I had goons!

"Oh wait, what should I have them do?" I raided Edward's closet and grabbed one of his smallest coats and hats. I then ran to Joker's room and found a pair of his pants that fit, after some creative hemming with a switchblade. I then ran to Jonathan's room and slipped into one of his shirts and hooked up his fear toxin canisters to his hidden mechanism that he'd left behind. I stopped and looked at myself in the mirror, it would have to do for now but I really needed my own outfit and soon.

I sat on the couch nervously fiddling with the fear toxin canisters when the door opened and five men waltzed right in dressed to the teeth in green. They froze when they saw me wearing Edward's colors and the cocky grins faded off their faces and they sat down quietly like puppets.

"You all know that Riddler is back in Arkham?" They all nodded and exchanged glances. "Well I'm starting to build an army to break him and two others out."

"Wait what others?" One of the goons got defensive and I narrowed my eyes at him. I really hoped I was being scary.

"Why my other two husbands of course, Jonathan Crane and Joker." I swear that all five men just peed themselves. Their eyes grew wide and paled until I thought they were ghosts.

"Wait you're…her?" One of the goons finally spoke up.

"You guys already have a name for me?" I lifted an eyebrow as all five men shared a glance and sat up a little straighter. Was this fear or respect? Maybe I should have had Scarecrow sit in with me.

"Everyone's been calling you the Manic Mystery." One of the goons looked like he could barely choke out the name. I just smiled as I already had a name, kind of a weird one but one all the same.

"Manic Mystery?" I lifted an eyebrow and one of the other goons cleared his throat.

"Yes Ma'am. Now what can we do for you today?" He sounded like a greeter at Wal-Mart. Speaking of Wal-Mart I was starving.

"Well first off I need a suit, and one of you needs to run to Wal-Mart and get me some Subway and some peppermint tea." One of the goons stood up with a salute.

"What kind and how much?" He was sweating, this poor guy was sweating bullets as if I were about to shoot him.

"Foot long veggie with lettuce, tomato, black olives, spinach, Parmesan cheese, mayo and on Italian herbs and cheese bread. And for the tea just bring a lot." With a blink the goon was gone and I was impressed. Why didn't I have any goons?

"I'll go find the dressmaker for you Ma'am." Another goon stood up and saluted me before running off after the other. I blinked in confusion.

"The dressmaker?" I tapped my chin in thought as one of the three remaining goons spoke up.

"Down in part of China town there's a guy that makes suits for the Rogues. Well he usually just makes them for Joker and Two-Face but I'm sure he'd make an exception for you." This goon was bald and seemed to be crying. What the hell did Edward do to these guys?

"Ah good. Now if we're going to do this I want damn sure that the Batman and his side kick are distracted to the point of being unable to single out any Rogues. I also want the cops kept busy." I pondered for a moment as one of the goons got a big smile across his face.

"Ah I see what you want Ma'am. I know a few pyrotechnic specialists that could help keep the cops busy. What do you have in store for Batman and his Robin?" This goon had long blonde hair that was gelled up in a Mohawk. He had painted a white mask across his tan face and large combat boots on.

"Oh something that will defiantly distract them both and give the boys a show." I chuckled darkly and all three men went ghostly pale again. "You two go gather some men and call me on Riddler's private line once you're ready." They both ran out the door as if they were in fire and the last goon was sweating bullets.

"Is it true that you're married to the Scarecrow too?" His eyes were wide and I'd always wanted to try this. I grinned and stood up slowly; I walked over to him and pretended to fix something on my sleeve.

"Oh is that doubt in your voice? Tell me, what are you afraid of?" With that I shot my wrist out and a spray of white powder flew into the goons face. He began gasping for air and screaming. He clutched the arms of the chair white knuckled and looked at me as if he were staring into the face of evil itself. This was really addicting and the bruise on my chest flared hot for a moment.

"Damn V. Remind me to stop leaving you alone around Jonathan's toxins." He grinned and pulled me to the side. The goon was staring right into Scarecrow's face now and was so choked up with fear that he couldn't scream anymore. Scarecrow got a wicked sadistic smile on his face and disappeared for a moment. When he reappeared he had some rope and tied the goon down tightly. "Now V do you know what happens when you lure a Scarecrow to your home with a scream?" He turned his attention to me and for a moment he seemed to have a demonic glow about him.

"Crow?" His eyes were burning fire and he reminded me of the first time I'd seen him, powered up with fear and nearly godlike.

"Oh no my little siren, lure a Scarecrow to your home with a scream and you get a raging fire in your bed." He picked me up and within seconds I was in Joker's room. It was almost like he'd teleported me and my eyes were wide in shock. The goon had started screaming again something about spiders and his third grade teacher. I blinked as Scarecrow ripped the clothing from my body with his talons and was dripping black tar from his mouth as if he were rabid.

(No stopping it now just grab a flashlight and try to survive.)

"Crow are you still in there?" He chuckled and pinned me to the bed so hard that I couldn't move. My eyes were wide; he'd never looked like this before. Was he rabid? Did I accidentally open something that I should have left closed?

"Oh daddy's home V and he likes what he sees." With that he crushed his burlap lips to mine and started stroking me with his taloned fingers. I grabbed his noose with my now free hand but he pushed it aside and ripped his clothing off his body. His tongue left trails of frothy tar down my body and he shoved his mouth on me. I gasped as his tongue went wild inside me and his burlap lips made my legs shake. He held my hips against his mouth like I was a feast. His tongue was making me boneless and I fisted my hands into the sheets. I was breathing in gasps until I came screaming.

He chuckled and crawled back up my body slowly like a cat stalking his prey. His eyes burned into mine and he smiled big showing his sharp blackened teeth. "My scream queen, mother to my children." His mouth was on mine again as he slammed himself home in me. I wrapped my legs around his waist and he groaned before starting a slow and deep pace.

"Oh god Mrs. Snickerblat it wasn't me I swear. Don't hit me again I'll be a good boy!" The goon was still screaming in the background but his screams just seemed to drive Scarecrow on.

"Scarecrow what about…" I whimpered as I nearly came from one deep thrust, I was feeling what Crow was feeling and my mind almost couldn't take it. Moments later I had stars flying past my eyes but he didn't stop, he seemed to just keep going.

"The world will burn around us and I'll make you a throne of screaming fleshlings." He murmured in my ear and picked up his pace until I swear he was going to rip me in half. I blacked out as I came again and Scarecrow bellowed with his own release. My body was on fire and my mind felt linked to his.

(Okay come out from under the bed it's over now.)

I woke up panting and Scarecrow was lying next to me with a glazed expression on his face. I felt boneless but I still managed to lift an arm and drop it on his face. He blinked and looked at me as if seeing me for the first time. His eyes widened and he looked shocked.

"V oh hell what did I do?" He sat up and winced as if he were in pain. He grabbed his head and groaned. "Oh hell."

"What the hell was all that Crow?" The screaming goon had been reduced to babbling like a baby and I hoped I hadn't broken him. Crow groaned and held his head in his hands.

"Well V, uh that was me officially claiming you as mine." He rubbed his face with a taloned hand and sighed. "Before you ask it kinda means that both you and Jonathan are stuck with me."

"Wait what?" I managed to sit up and rubbed my stomach gently hoping that I hadn't traumatized my unborn children.

"Uh V it means that…" He trailed off.

'Scarecrow what the fuck did you do?' Jonathan's voice bellowed in my head and I froze. My eyes grew wide and Scarecrow rubbed the back of his head nervously.

'Jonathan?' I timidly spoke into my head and I felt Scarecrow stiffen and another presence freeze in my mind.

'V? Oh hell no. Crow you didn't!'

'Sorry Johnnie boy, got lost in myself a bit and laid some framework in my woman.'

'Scarecrow get your ass back in Arkham we need to have a talk.' Jonathan's voice echoed in my head and I had a buzzing feeling behind my eyes that was making them water. 'And you V, seriously? I'm not sure if I'm more turned on or angry that you used my toxin without asking. We're going to have a long talk later too. And I swear to god if I find out that you're about to take on the Batman I'll…'

'Okay I won't tell you then.' I gave Scarecrow a glare and he kissed me before disappearing. I could feel him pulling away from me and it was like I was in two places at once. This couldn't be good for my babies I just knew it. I took a shower and re-dressed before giving the babbling goon some antidote. He passed out and I untied him, I had just re hidden the ropes when two goons burst in excitedly.

"The dressmaker will make you a suit Mystery!" The one goon was jumping with joy.

"I've got your food!" The other had my lunch and the tea. I gave a weak smile and motioned for them to head to the kitchen. I rubbed my head as I sat down and inhaled my food like I hadn't eaten in days.

"Whenever you're ready the dressmaker will start a suit for you. We just need to get you to him and he'll take your measurements and color preferences." The one goon had made tea for everyone and we sipped from our cups silently.

"Until Boss is freed we'll both be your personal body guards, your own goon squad." The other goon nodded and leaned back in his chair. "I'm Zach and this," He pointed to the other guy who had short cropped brown hair and brown eyes. "This is Gerald." I looked back at Zach he had black hair that hung into his eyes and didn't look older then twenty. He had a healthy tan to him and looked like he could take care of himself in a fight. Gerald was pale and looked more like he was at home in front of a computer then fighting. I nodded and sipped my tea with a sigh.

"Well then, let's go see the dressmaker." I adjusted my outfit as I stood and looked around my apartment. I really hoped I was ready for this because I needed to break my men out now more then ever. And once I did, Scarecrow and Jonathan had a lot of explaining to do.