Hi there! I'm back with chapter six! I've been on vacation in Florida this past week, and I'm sooo glad to be back in Austin! I've missed my bed. My birthday passed recently, and I am now 18! Channing Tatum, I'm legal! ;)
Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly. Dick Wolf wasn't even kind enough to send Mariska as a birthday gift. Boo.
Olivia stood in front of the mirror and smoothed down her dress with a shaky hand. She let out a ragged breath and adjusted the way her curls fell.
"This is it, Benson.." she whispered to herself.
It was the day of her wedding, finally, and she had been an emotional wreck all day. She had asked her bridesmaids to give her a minute alone, and she'd spent the whole time pacing and fixing her dress.
She was terrified. She didn't want to screw anything up, and she didn't want Jamie to back out. She was ten seconds away from running and sparing Jamie the heartache of marrying someone with as much baggage and damage as she had.
She knew that Jamie was better off without her, and that she couldn't be the wife that he deserved. She also couldn't stop thinking about her Mom. She wished that Serena Benson was standing behind her, fixing her veil, and telling her how beautiful she looked. She wished more than anything that she had her Mother there with her to push her down the aisle to the man of her dreams.
She smoothed down her dress once more upon hearing a knock on the door. "Come in.."
The door slowly opened. "Are you decent?"
Olivia chuckled at the voice of her partner. "Why would I tell you to come in if I were indecent?"
"Touche.." he smirked, walking up to her as they both looked in the mirror. "Wow, you look beautiful."
Olivia smiled, blushing like crazy. "Thank you."
"No problem.."
"Elliot, can I ask you something?"
"Of course." He said, fixing her veil.
She sighed shakily. "Am I doing the right thing by marrying Jamie?"
"Liv, you have a man standing at that altar willing to give you everything you've ever wanted." Elliot said. "I see how happy he makes you, and even though we're not the biggest fans of each other, he really loves you. If you're happy, if you love him, then yes. You are absolutely doing the right thing."
"I love him, and I am happy, but I just.. I feel like he can do so much better than me." Olivia said, feeling tears forming in her eyes. "He's one of the best men I've ever met, and he has so much to offer a person and he chose me. It doesn't make sense."
"Olivia, you're gorgeous, you're intelligent, you're kind, you have every single thing that a man could ask for. I don't know why you constantly put yourself down, because you are worthy of so much happiness in your life and it's about time you take hold of that." Elliot said, handing her a tissue from the box on the table.
She wiped her eyes and nose with the tissue and smiled at her partner. "I'm gonna have to redo my makeup, y'know.."
"You could walk down the aisle with running mascara and you'd still be the most beautiful woman in the world."
Elliot was mentally kicking himself because he couldn't believe he'd just said that. It was true, no doubt, but he didn't know how appropriate it was to say.
Olivia chuckled and straightened out his tie. "Thanks for wearing this penguin suit for me."
"Anything for you."
"I need to fix my makeup, then I'll be ready to roll.. gimme five?"
"Take all the time you need. They can't do anything without the bride." Elliot chuckled.
Olivia smiled and walked over to the vanity table and began retouching her makeup. A few minutes later, she was ready, and looped her arm into Elliot's.
"Thanks for walking me down the aisle.." Olivia said softly. "It means a lot."
"Neither of us would have it any other way..." Elliot said. "You ready?"
She inhaled shakily and nodded. "Yeah."
"Hey, Jill?" Elliot said, getting the attention of Jamie's sister as they walked out of the dressing room. "She's ready."
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •
Elliot sat on his old, stained and tattered blue couch that he bought at a garage sale with a beer in his hand and a bag of chips on the cushion beside him. It was his day off of everything. His day off of work, his day off of the gym, and his day off of Olivia. The one day that he made sure he didn't think about Olivia and all of the dirty things that he wanted to do to her.
He blankly stared at his TV as the latest Yankees game was on. He wasn't paying attention, not really. All he could think of was the fact that he was almost done with his last beer. That didn't slow down his drinking, of course, it just prepared him for the end.
As he reached for another potato chip, an incessant knocking caused him to drop the chip and drag his feet to his front door.
"I'm coming!" he yelled to the door.
The frenzied knocking stopped and he finally reached it, unlocking it and inwardly groaning as he saw his ex-wife standing on the other side.
"Kathy.." he said, roughly blinking away the lights of the TV and allowing his eyes to focus on the disheveled woman. "Come on in."
Kathy walked into his apartment that reeked of beer, salt, and sweat, and took a seat on the couch.
"What's up?" He asked, sitting on the opposite end of the couch and putting his hand behind his head.
"I'm pregnant." She said, not even bothering to take a breath before, after, or in between the words.
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •
Olivia stood on top of a step stool as she straightened out her framed wedding picture.
"There?" She called to her husband, who'd been sitting on the couch watching her.
"Yeah." He responded, letting her know that it was finally straight.
"I'm so glad they finally came in." She said, letting out a sigh as she stepped off of the stool and onto the hardwood floor of their home.
Jamie nodded, lifting his arm onto the back of the couch and allowing her to nestle her body against his before wrapping his arm around her.
"It looks nice." He complimented, looking up at their first picture as husband and wife.
They'd been married for a month and three days now, and had settled into their new home and life nicely. It felt natural for the both of them to call one another husband and wife.
Olivia fiddled with her wedding band as Jamie flipped through the channels on the television.
"Oh, look, the Yankees are playing!" Olivia said, pointing to the TV as she recognized the Jerseys of her favorite team.
"Honey, you know I hate baseball.." Jamie said, kissing her head and changing the channel.
Olivia knew. How could she forget? Her husband hated her favorite sport.
Jamie put it on CNN, and Olivia could feel herself falling asleep from the boring channel. She was not a news person. She dealt with enough of the messed up world in her job, she didn't need to relive it in the comfort of her own home.
The ringing of her cell phone caused her to wake up and grab her phone off the coffee table.
"It's Jessa.." Olivia said, furrowing her eyebrows and holding the phone to her ear. "Hello?"
"Jess? What does she want?" Jamie asked, receiving a shush and a finger in his face.
"Olivia."
"Hey, honey, what's up?"
"Is my Dad around?"
"Yeah, he's right beside me, y'wanna talk to him?"
"No. No, I need to talk to you, actually. Can you go somewhere away from my Dad?"
"Sure.. hold on." Olivia got up and walked out of the room. "Okay, what's up?"
"When did you know you were ready to have sex?"
Olivia was completely caught off guard by the question. "Umm.. I can't remember, why?"
"I... I think that I'm ready."
"Well, honey, I don't exactly know what to say. I can't tell you not to have sex, but I can tell you to make sure that you are absolutely as safe as you can possibly be."
"What do you mean, like condoms?"
"Condoms, yes. Always, always make sure that he wears a condom. Never let him talk you out of it."
"Well, I wanna get on birth control, but I'm too scared to ask my mom.. will you take me?"
"To get birth control?"
"Yeah."
"Uhhh, I don't know, sweetie. I'm not sure if that's my place..."
"You're practically my mom now, Liv. You married my Dad, and I trust you. I want you take me. Please?"
"Okay.. okay, I'll take you next week when you come up here."
"Cool, thanks."
"So, who's the boy?" Olivia asked with a smirk as she sat on the swing on their porch.
"His name's Dillon. He's got brown hair, brown eyes, and he plays baseball.. his butt looks pretty great in those pants, so I figured he was a winner."
Olivia couldn't help but laugh at her stepdaughter's statement.
"He's a senior, and he's got a 3.4 GPA, and he ranks 14 in his class. I think he's pretty great."
"Wow, good job! He seems like a great kid... I just want you to be safe, honey, and smart. Losing your virginity, Jessa, it changes you. It completely changes you, and I want you to make sure that you're one hundred and ten percent ready."
"I am, I'm ready, Olivia."
"You're 17, Jessa. You're a junior in high school, and soon you'll be graduating and heading off to college. You're growing up. Sex is all a part of growing up."
"How old were you? I know you didn't forget."
"I was 16."
"And did you regret it?"
"To a certain extent.. I regretted the fact that I lost my virginity to a man nearly twice my age, and I regretted the fact that I did it in the backseat of his Mustang, but other than that, no. I was ready, we were safe, and we were in love."
"Nearly twice your age!"
"Yeah.. not my proudest moment. Things were different back then..."
"Jeez, you make it sound like you were born in the 30's!"
Olivia chuckled. "He was in college.. my mom ended it when she found it."
"That's good. I wouldn't want my sixteen year old dating an older guy."
"Yeah, it was.. a stupid thing to do."
"Don't tell my Dad anything..."
"You've got my word, honey."
"Thanks.. I'll call later to say goodnight."
"Alright, love you sweetheart."
"Love you, too."
Olivia hung up the phone with a small, accomplished smile on her face. She'd just handled her very first official stepmother talk, and felt extremely good about it.
She sat there on their back porch and allowed her feet to push against the wood of the floor and gently swing her back and forth. It was the middle of September, and the breeze was just right. Not too cold to where she froze her toes just sitting outside, but not too hot to where she was uncomfortable sitting outside. It was perfect.
She let her hair fly all around her as the wind attacked her. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back.
"Hey," Jamie stepped onto the patio and sat beside her.
She smiled, leaning into him. "Hi.."
"What did Jessa want?" He asked, kissing her.
"Girl talk.." Olivia said, crossing her arms and cuddling deeper against her husband.
Jamie wrapped his arms around Olivia and leaned his head against hers.
"It's nice out here.." Jamie said.
"Mmm," Olivia moaned, closing her eyes and enjoying the serenity of the moment with her husband.
"I'm glad we both managed to get a day off..." Jamie said, lifting up a corner of her gray sweater and circling the tips of his fingers against the tan skin of her stomach.
"Me too," Olivia said softly, shuddering as the touch of Jamie's fingers caused goosebumps to form on her skin.
"You getting hungry?" Jamie asked.
"Little bit.."
"How 'bout I cook my lovely lady a nice juicy steak and maybe if you're lucky, I'll toss in a baked potato and salad.." Jamie teased, trailing his fingers even higher up her shirt.
"Mmm, throw in a glass of wine and you just might get lucky tonight." Olivia smirked, looking up at him as he leaned in for a kiss.
"Talk of dessert before we even get to dinner, you're my kind of woman.." He chuckled.
"Come on, honey.. get up and cook me dinner." Olivia smiled, standing up and pulling her husband with her.
He smiled, cupping her face and placing a kiss to her lips. "As you wish, my love."
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •
"What are we gonna do?" Elliot asked, running a hand over his face as he sat beside his crying ex-wife.
"I mean, it might be Steve's, but I needed to tell you because it might also be yours.." Kathy said, sniffling and wiping her nose with her sleeve.
"Kathy..." Elliot sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "This is a mess."
"I know." She nodded, sniffling. "I know it is, and I'm sorry to put you through this, but you needed to know."
"What the hell are we gonna do?"
"I need to tell Steve."
"You haven't told Steve?!" Elliot nearly yelled.
"No, I figured I'd tell you first!"
"How far along are you?" Elliot asked.
"I don't know, Elliot, I haven't been to the doctor!" Kathy snapped.
Elliot stood up and began pacing behind his couch. Kathy watched, nervous as to what he was thinking.
He didn't want to have a fourth child at the moment. He wasn't ready to start all over with a new baby. He sure as hell wasn't ready to do it all with Kathy. Raising their first four had been one giant obstacle course from hell, every little thing was an argument, and he didn't want to do all of that with her again.
"There's still a chance.." he sighed. "That it's not mine."
Kathy shook her head in disbelief. She didn't expect him to try and push this pregnancy away so quickly. "I mean, there's a possibility.."
"What are you going to tell Steve? That you cheated on him with your ex-husband and now you don't know who your baby's father is?"
"Screw you!"
"I'm just being a realist, Kathy!" Elliot yelled. "Do you expect him to be okay with that? Do you expect me to be okay with that?"
"You knew I was in a relationship with someone else when you got in my bed!"
"Yeah, and so did you! It was wrong on both of our parts, Kathy! But what I'm saying is that Steve isn't going to want to help support a baby that might not even be his.. I'll help you with what I can, Kathy, but will Steve?"
"I don't know..." Kathy said, feeling herself begin to tear up again.
"I'm not comfortable with the idea of supporting another man's unborn child.." Elliot said, sitting down beside her. "But this kid could also be mine... I don't know what to do, Kathy."
"I'll tell you what, Elliot.." Kathy said, putting her hand on his knee. "I'll take care of everything until the baby's born. I'll let Steve know exactly what's going on, and if he loves me enough to forgive me, then great. If not, then so be it. I'll figure things out. Don't worry about anything until a DNA test can be done.."
"Well, the date of conception can help a lot, right?"
"I don't know.. I slept with you and Steve pretty consecutively."
Elliot sighed, throwing his head on the back of the couch and covered his face with his hands.
"This is a mess, Kath.. this whole thing is a mess."
Ooohhhhh, Kathy's pregnant! IS IT POSSIBLE THAT BABY ELI IS MAKING HIS DEBUT!? Well, review por favor, and you'll find out soon enough! Can paternity tests be done while the baby's still in the womb? I read that it's possible, but carries a lot of risks (like 1 in 200 miscarriages), and I also read that it isn't possible.. I swear that it is, though? Idk. Anyway, I wanted to include some part of the wedding, that's why the first part is there. I really hope to update sometime soon. It depends on when I get the next chapter written. Love y'all!
*sorry that this skips ahead.. but none of my chapters ever take place one day after the other. I like to move quickly! Lol.. next chapter will be Jessa's trip to New York.
Xoxoxoxo,
Bri