Author's Notes:

Ah, so sorry. The moment I had inspiration to write I was distracted by Macross Frontier (yeah, I know, a bit late to join the fandom now *lolz*).

This chapter contains minor Rabi / Ellen content, but it's rather one-sided and abusive… The way I like to write it X3

Disclaimer: D. Gray-Man belongs to Katsura Hoshino

Kapitel 36: Beyond the Masks

A chill ran through Ellen when she took in the young man in front of her. Rhode's words resounded like a haunting echo in her head. She would have to fight Rabi. Rabi's soul was dead. Fight him! Ellen wanted to whirl around to shout at Rhode for making such crude remarks, but she did not have the time to as Rabi came rushing at her – with his bare fists and a face void of any emotion. Ellen shouted in surprise and frustration and blocked his attack by drawing up her broad sword. The punch was so strong that Ellen lost her balance and Rabi landed another hit against her rib-case. The young girl gasped in shock and pain, falling backwards. Trembling, she tried to sit up on her knees, the sword hilt still in her hand. She was not really sure what to do with it – it was impossible to raise her weapon! Not in such a situation!

„I cannot believe it!" she thought, „Rabi is really attacking me!" Rabi appeared behind her before she could gather her thoughts and strength. With an immense power - Ellen had never thought Rabi possessed - he slammed his foot down onto Ellen, pushing her roughly against the cracked stone floor. The impact made Ellen cough up blood. Her head was feeling strange and her body hurt all over as she had had no time to even recover a bit after defeating Tyki Mikk. And now this!! Ellen forced her head to focus on the fight which was really necessary as Rabi slammed his fist down on her, aimed at her head, but she could dodge it just barely. The young man above her didn't react to her evading his attacks, he merely drew back his fist for another punch.

„Oh dear God, I can't! I can't do this!" Ellen thought frantically, tears starting to well up in her eyes when she looked at the calm, expressionless face of her friend. „How did this happen? Why did this need to happen?! Rabi can't possibly want to fight me!!" Ellen tried to resist and pushed her hand against Rabi's chest but he didn't move a bit, even when she started hammering against his breast, more because she was frustrated and at a loss what to do and not because she wanted to harm him. „Something must have bewitched Rabi!" Ellen concluded and stopped her rather pathetic hammering in order to grab her sword. With it she could exorcise the evil in someone – at least that is what she wishes for, that is what it must be for. She lifted her sword and pierced Rabi. „I need to make this possession stop! Please God, this has to work!!" Ellen prayed and waited for a reaction. Rabi was still calm and simply looked down at the sword, not concerned but not changed either. He broke Ellen's hopes by brutally slamming his flat hand against her face, smashing her head against the floor in the process. While her head throbbed painfully she could hear Rhode screaming:

„A sword that doesn't kill and only exorcises will not help you here! Rabi has lost his soul, but he is not possessed! If you want to have success then you need to use your left arm!" Ellen tried to sit up but the first thing she saw were the candles pointed at Linali and Chao Zhi. „If you do not use your Innocence claw then I will kill them!" Ellen widened her eyes in shock, her mouth open to scream but no sound came. Then Rabi continued attacking her, while she just half-heartedly blocked with her sword, taking some hits as a consequence. But what should she do? What should she do?!

„Take your other weapon, Ellen!! Or do you want to hear Linali scream?!" Rhode said with sadistic and mad laughter, while Ellen was pushed against a wall by Rabi. Ellen had to cough up more blood, Rabi was incredibly strong and his attacks were cruel. How? Why? Ellen could not stand this. When he was close enough for her to reach him she lifted her arm, blade still in her hand and embraced him, holding him as close as she could. He was warm against her body, warm but stiff, not bending into her touch like her friend Rabi would have done.

„Rabi..." Ellen whispered, her voice breaking from the tears she started to shed. „My voice... Can't you hear me?" She tightened the grip she had on his neck, pushing her cheek against his, her tears also falling on his skin. He did not move, but he didn't attack either. He stood there like a statue, calm, probably listening. „We... We are the only ones here that can still protect Linali and Chao Zhi. Have you forgotten? Crowley chose to fight alone so that we could continue. Do you want to ignore this burden he took upon himself? And... and" Here Ellen's breath hitched, but she continued speaking: „And Kanda... What about Kanda? Do we not want to be here for him when he returns to us? What will he think if he sees us fighting like this? What about the promise he gave to us and the promise you have given to him? Didn't you promise to protect me from harm...?" she whispered. Rabi finally moved, but he only mercilessly slammed his fist into her chest, robbing her of all breath. Then he took her by the collar, pushing her up against the wall, her feet hanging above ground and the wound on her head leaving ugly read stains on the cracked stone.

"R… abi… Please, stop this… I cannot fight my friend…!" Ellen said, looking at him with anguish in her eyes, begging him to stop this cruelty.

"I am not your friend." Rabi finally answered, strengthening the grip his strong, cold fingers had on Ellen's throat. She widened her eyes in disbelief.

"W… What…?" Ellen whispered. "What are you saying?" Rabi's calm face did not change, but he moved a little closer.

"I am a Bookman, I observe. I only joined you because it was beneficial to me. However, I never considered you to be my friends," he told her. Ellen drew in a loud, shaking breath.

"I cannot believe what you tell me… That is not true, Rabi!"

"It is true. You can close your eyes on reality as much as you want, Ellen," he told her, his warm breath touching her blood stained face. And his calm words were the most painful blow he had dealt yet. Ellen was speechless and incredulous. The fact that he had used her name with the same familiarity as he always did almost made her believe he was serious. No, she knew that he was serious.

"But… how. No! I trust you, Rabi… You can't…" She couldn't bring herself to finish. Ellen's grip on the sword hilt strengthened but she did not intend to use it on Rabi again.

"I can't have acted?" Rabi continued the sentence for her and Ellen squeezed her eyes shut, "people take things as they come. We always act on convenience and necessity. Your mask is not all too different from mine…" Rabi said, bending over Ellen, his green eye uncannily dark and dull. He lowered Ellen, so that she again had floor under her feet that immediately gave way. Ellen tumbled down on the floor, staring up at Rabi.

"I am not wearing a mask! Neither have you been! I simply cannot believe what you are telling me!" she shouted, not giving up on him yet - she still had hopes to wake him up again. But her hopes were fast fading as Rabi gave no sign of reaction.

"I told you to do as you please…" the young man in front of her replied, letting go of her throat to grab her chin, forcing her to look at him. What she saw gave her even more pain: there was no cheerful Rabi looking at her, just a solemn, stern young man. "You still try to find your friend in me, do you not? You always relied on me. You told me your secrets, your fears and spilled out your heart. Now, where have all these confessions gone?" Ellen bit her lips then she averted her eyes, tears flowing down her cheeks. He spoke the truth: from the very first moment she had met him he had been fascinating to her, she had always trusted Rabi. She had told him of worries that she would have never dared to confess to Linali or even Kanda. Rabi had something to him that assured her that all her secrets and fears were safe with him. He was that perfect older brother that she could always rely on. If she couldn't protect herself and if Kanda couldn't either then he would be there to stand in front of her, shielding her from harm. But now… what was Ellen to believe? Her heart, or her eyes that showed her this stranger?

"I…" Ellen spoke up, still looking at the floor, "I know that all I confided in you is safely tugged away within you… Just like your smile, your warmth and your friendship…" She looked up, daring to meet his eye, but his face was still unchanged.

"Humans," Rabi started, "are pathetic". Ellen widened her eyes in shock as she heard this reply, "I have no deeper interest in such beings and the feeble affections between them. However," he stared at Ellen and she stared right back, beginning to feel afraid under his intensive glare. "I do have an interest in you – stupid female specimen as you are, you still managed to be fascinating to me as a Bookman"

"What… what are you talking about Rabi?" Ellen managed to ask, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable, half naked and pushed against the wall.

"You are the destroyer of time, important to the exorcists, but you are also important in the normal world – as the heiress to an old family. You, Ellen Walker, have become the centre of the universe for many people. But do you think you can handle that responsibility? And do you think you deserve this honour?" While Ellen still hadn't found her voice, Rabi inched closer, brushing his mouth against her cheek. His hands travelled down, over her bare left breast, down to her abdomen. His hushed breath tickled her ear but his words froze her to her very core: "You were not supposed to do that. You were not supposed to fall for him. You were not supposed to give him hope. If you don't pay attention you will smash the hearts you hold in your hand. Because your disobedience is marked into your flesh, the scar on your face is the testimony that you are alive, even though you should be dead. Alive and warm and false – it's here. You cannot erase your misdeeds, because it's alive, growing, spreading. Here." He pressed his hands against her stomach and Ellen widened her eyes, staring down at his hands, then she lifted her head to look into his eyes, her face full of unvoiced shock and horror.

"What?" she breathed in disbelief. "What are you saying?". Rabi just took away his hands, walking away some steps, always keeping eye contact with her. He then bent down and grabbed his Innocence that was lying next to him, invocating it to a bigger size.

"I remember everything you told me, every loving word about you he confessed. I watched you, I observed. Do you think you deserve his love? Or mine, if I gave it?" After he spoke, a serpent of fire manifested around his Innocence, ready to attack her. Ellen looked at him, too troubled by his words to reply. What should she do with these accusations? Was he right? Ellen shook her head and with trembling limbs she managed to get up, never letting go of her sword. Now was not the time to worry about her guilt – if she did not act now she might die or fall prey to this stranger's abusive words. She wanted neither. She had to believe that there was a way out of this mess – if she gave in here everything she had done after Mana's death would turn out to be pointless. And why should she waste the life he had made possible for her? Why should she waste the life that had managed to pull through until this moment?

"Rabi…" she said, looking at him. He did not react to her, but just unleashed his attack. Ellen raised her Crown Clown, splitting the attack in two, but not destroying it. She jumped away from the twin serpents that now targeted her. "My Innocence cannot stop his. To counter Rabi's attacks I would need my claw…!" Rabi appeared behind her and she blocked the pole of his hammer with her sword. "But I cannot do it! The claw would hurt him! Friend or not, I can't allow this to happen!"

"Rabi!", Ellen shouted at him, "You must listen to me! This cannot be happening! Please! I don't know if I deserve to be loved by all of you, but please! I will try my best!" Rabi continued ignoring her words and smashed her down with another elemental attack. Ellen, as she couldn't have blocked it, fell to the ground, nearly unconscious. While she was lying on the floor, the first flames of Rabi's next attack appearing around her, she could hear both Linali and Rhode shouting. She could not make out what their words were, but she was sure that to give up here would not only demand her life. It was as Rabi had said; a lot of people depended on her to be strong. Maybe she had trusted too much on Rabi's aid, Linali's help and Kanda's affection. But she could not do all of this alone. She just… could not be that strong. She needed them. All of them. Ellen clenched her hands and pressed her lips together for one last try. She grabbed her sword and sat up, slamming it into Rabi's chest as she had already done before.

"My last try! Either it works or we are done for! If Rabi is controlled by Rhode's powers…!" Rabi did seem surprised as he hadn't seen the attack coming, but Ellen's focus was not on him; it was not him she tried to attack. With all the force her right arm could muster, she pushed the sword, making it pass straight through Rabi and hit its actual goal: Rhode. Ellen's aim had been perfect, her sword pierced Rhode and she feel to the floor. But just as Ellen started to hope, the young girl sat back up with amused laughter.

"How unlucky!" Rhode grabbed the sword hilt and pulled it out of her chest with ease. "You should know that your attacks have no effect on me. On top of that, you first have to pierce something else with your sword: I am me, but not as I appear to be! Those who do not know my true form cannot kill me!" Ellen watched her throw away the sword in horror; this had been her last chance! "Ellen! Why don't you try listening to me? Oh well. You are only a human, Ellen. You're not to blame for that… But give up on it!!" The next fire serpent engulfed Ellen, carrying her up into the air. She screamed in shock, but after a while of floating amongst the flames she realized that it wasn't burning her. Ellen pulled herself up, looking around in shock. She could see Rabi through the flames.

"What is happening!?" She saw how Rabi suddenly moved, slamming his hammer down onto the floor.

"Heh! I am still immature! But you will pay for this!! Fire! Regardless of the consequences!!" she heard him shout and then she, safe within the fire serpent, she saw how a gigantic column of fire shot up, with Rabi in its middle. The whole tower became a sea of fire, but Ellen, Linali and Chao Zhi were safe.

"No!" Ellen shouted once she realized what Rabi had done. She had not been wrong to believe in him despite what he said to her. She had trusted him, and he repaid that trust by now attempting to kill both Rhode and himself. Ellen had to act, fast. She pushed her hand against the interior of the fire serpent, calling for her Crown Clown. The sword reacted and flew to her. She broke through the fire, landed on the cube where Linali and Chao Zhi were still imprisoned, and then she continued to the gigantic fire serpent, trying to get to its very core.

"Rabi!!!" Ellen shouted, "Damn it! I will certainly not let you die here!!" She finally managed to get through the fire wall, the flames tugging at her despite the cape she was wearing, but she did not care. She could make out Rabi in the middle of the fire and she ran to him, reaching out for him until she finally managed to put her hand on his. She embraced him with both of her arms – she felt that the sword was no longer needed - the cape of her Innocence covering both of them, sheltering them from the flames.

"Rabi… Rabi…!" she called him, "please, you must stay with me…" She could feel Rabi stir and the flames around them started to solidify. After a while Ellen managed to break the solid cage, enabling them both to breathe again.

"Aaah! Breathing hurts!!!" was the first thing she heard Rabi shout and Ellen coughed as well. "But I am alive…" Rabi said after a while, lying on his back and looking upwards. Ellen still tried to catch her breath, but she turned to look at him; he had a smile on his lips. Ellen let out a sigh of relief, but… Her heart still ached from what he had said to her. "That was quite a wild action, Ellen!"

"Why are you complaining?!" Ellen managed to shout and Rabi laughed.

"I don't even know… When I came to I had already started the fire. I guess the old Panda will be quite angry with me… But I don't feel bad…" he told her. Ellen remained silent, studying him.

"What is Rabi really hiding behind his smile…? And how much of the things he had told me were his true feelings?" the young girl wondered. She had never stopped trusting him and she was glad that he was back to normal, but she couldn't forget his words either. Her dark thoughts were interrupted by Linali and Chao Zhi appearing. Linali rushed to Rabi and slammed her fist against his cheek.

"You IDIOT!" she shouted, but then she embraced him, crying loudly. Ellen smiled at that while Rabi tried to apologize to Linali. After Linali had let go of him, Ellen pulled Rabi up on his feet, his arm over her shoulder.

"Next time I will not help you, just so you know," she told him and he laughed goofily. As they were making their way out of the solid flames, loud laughter suddenly echoed through the tower. It was Rhode, barely recognizable because she had been caught by the flames. She turned to look at them.

"Ellen…" was the only thing she said, then she dissolved into dust. Ellen looked at the spot where she disappeared in wonder. Rabi had defeated her but was she really dead? Ellen, as much as she disliked the girl, would feel very sorry if that was the case.

"What the heck was that?" Chao Zhi wondered. "Did she laugh herself to death?"

"That sounded as if she shouted your name," Rabi whispered at Ellen, "She really was crazy about you… What are you doing with young girls, Ellen?! Kanda would be mortified to find out about that!"

"Rabi, please, stop your nonsense!" Ellen said, slamming her elbow into his stomach.

"Ellen…" Linali spoke up, when Rabi started teasing her as revenge for the punch, "Rhode has disappeared… And the exit is on the top of this tower! Doesn't it exist thanks to Rhode's power?"

"Aaah!!" Ellen shouted as she realized this. "Rabi! Fast! Go up and have a look!!" Rabi nodded frantically, putting his Innocence down, standing on it.

"I will pull you up if everything's clear!" he shouted, then he already disappeared upwards. Just when he was gone the whole building started to tremble.

"Sit down, everything starts to crumble!" Ellen told the two and they sat on the floor, waiting for good news from Rabi. "We probably have less than half an hour left…" Ellen thought, holding her uniform together as not to show too much of her chest. But that was her smallest worry at this moment. If they really had no time left, then what had become of their friends? "Crowley… Kanda…" She looked around, "they haven't followed us… They are not here…"

"Ellen…" Linali said after a long silence, "You are thinking about not being able to go with us, even if we find the door still intact… Am I right?". Ellen turned around and looked at her friend. She laughed slightly, earning herself a frown from Linali. "Ellen!"

"Maybe the baron and Kanda are still here somewhere. I will go to look for them, before the Ark disappears entirely…" Ellen looked at her wrist; the fire had burnt the fabric away, revealing the bracelet Kanda had given her. One of the glass balls was slightly cracked but they were all shimmering and sparkling in the light. "Kanda…" Ellen thought, pressing her lips together.

"I will…", Linali started when she saw her friend's pained face, but Ellen turned to look at her, interrupting her.
"You will go with the others, Linali. I know that I am demanding a lot from you… But you must understand… I have left both Kanda and Crowley behind… It is my duty to go find them… And I am less injured than you are… I will be fine…"

"You… you are being unfair…" Linali said and started to cry, "you know how I feel when you say that but still you smile at me. But… but I understand your feelings. And I want us to go back home together… So please… Please pay attention…" Ellen smiled at her and nodded.

"The door is still here!!" Rabi shouted from above and the others looked up, "I will pull you up!!" Ellen sighed in relief and they walked over to the pole. "Linali and Chao Zhi are injured, you have to hold on to them Ellen! Can you do that?"

"Do not worry, of course I can!" Ellen grabbed the pole with one hand, while holding on to Chao Zhi with the other. Linali had put both of her arms around Ellen's neck. "We are all set! Pull us up Rabi!" Ellen said, but as Rabi did, she caught sight of Tyki and Lelo. "Tyki Mikk…"

"Hurry up, we don't know how long the door will be here!" Rabi shouted and helped them all up. But as they walked to the door, Ellen turned around.

"Hey! Ellen!", Rabi shouted, when he saw her turn back.

"Please wait a moment before you go! I will get Lelo and Tyki Mikk!" Ellen said, invocating her Innocence.

"What?!" Rabi shouted in surprise, "Are you mad?!" He caught hold of Ellen's arm.

"Tyki Mikk is a human now! I have exorcised him, the Noah in him is gone! You have seen that Rabi! There are humans waiting for his return! We cannot let him die! Please, let me go and get them!"

"… Well, it's fine with me. But what if the order finds out that you have saved a Noah? That will mean trouble for you, Ellen…" Rabi tried to reason with her.

"That doesn't matter. Will you wait for me?" Ellen asked and Rabi sighed, but nodded. "Thank you. I will bring him up. Take him and go through the gate, do not wait for me. I have to get Crowley and Kanda as well…" Rabi sighed, but then he nodded.
"But be quick! I'll come with you after we sent them to safety!" Rabi said and Ellen smiled at him cheerfully.
"Thank you!"

"You want to save him? Haven't you killed him?" Ellen turned around and saw Chao Zhi glare at her.

"He is still alive…" Ellen replied after she saw the hostile expression on his face.

"But why? This bastard is an ally of the Akuma. He killed Anita, Mahoja and all of my friends! So why?! Save?! What is that supposed to mean, save?! Do you want to say that you will betray our feelings?!" he shouted. Ellen decided not to reply; there was nothing she could have said to him to make him calm down. She knew that her decision would not sit well with most people. But if it lay in her power to save someone, she wanted to do it.

"If you save him, then you are my enemy!" Chao Zhi continued and Rabi shouted at him. "My enemy! A DEVIL like those monsters!!!" Ellen couldn't even react to his hateful words, because she felt a sudden trembling go through her. She pushed Chao Zhi away and in the next second she was caught in an attack that came from below.

"Ellen!!" Linali shouted.

"Don't come closer!!" Ellen replied as she was being squeezed by serpent like tentacles. She felt that she was being pulled down and then she was slammed to the floor. All of her body hurt and she was barely able to breathe. Before her she could see the remnants of Rhode's smashed door.

"N… No… The door..." She heard something come closer and tried to raise her head. What she saw filled her whole body with terror.

"Y… You… The Noah powers! But I have destroyed them!" Ellen gasped, "that… that cannot be!" Tyki was walking towards her, the strange tentacles that had pulled her down were coming from him. "Who are you? Are you Tyki Mikk?" The person in front of her did not reply and Ellen slammed her fist into the ground, squeezing her eyes shut in despair. With nearly no strength left she forced herself to sit up. "My heart is beating fast… My breath is ice-cold… I feel… very bad…" Ellen thought, but she still transformed her arm into her sword. She had to go on… Tyki continued to be her enemy. The fight was not over yet.

To be continued

Notes:

I ended it here because there's another short fight following. And it's getting tedious…

My friend Esmerod and I had a discussion about the battle between Allen and Rabi in the manga. We both agreed that Allen should have been affected more than he was and that Ellen would take Rabi's "betrayal" even more to heart. That's why I wrote the chapter like this. I hope that I did not overdo it…

Just in case that you wonder: Rabi does have some unconscious fascination with Ellen – but he cannot give in to it (as Bookman, as Ellen's friend and protector, as Kanda's friend etc etc). And Ellen, as an admirer of his good looks, his cheerful behaviour and his learning, likes him as well. But yeah, from her side it's rather sisterly affection. From his side…? Ahahaha. … … This fanfiction is definitely Yullen. I won't change my mind! XD

I would be happy to hear your thoughts! :D