Chapter Five

Weasley Problems and Patroni Joys

"You wanted to see me, professor?" It was after their Wednesday class and Harry had stayed behind. He had a study period next – one of his few open periods of the week.

Remus could hear the exhaustion in Harry's voice. His heart panged. He was actually going to ask this child to do something in addition to everything else? By now, nearly the entire school had heard of Harry's new resolution. Most of the school scoffed. Even some of the Gryffindors seemed skeptical about Harry's choices. "Yes, Harry. I heard some interesting information from a few professors." He laced some humor into his voice. "You told Flitwick about your patronus?"

"Yes, and Sinistra, and—" Harry trailed off, seeming a little nervous. "Um… I've cast the spell a lot."

"Oh?" Remus said. He hadn't heard anything about this. Sure, he'd expected the young boy to practice, but the way he said a lot. "What do you mean?"

Harry dropped his bag onto the floor of the classroom and let out a nervous little sound. "Well, I was with Professor Sinistra and I had to show her… And she said I could try casting it multiple times and it worked. So far, I've only gotten four, and then I can't find another memory strong enough, but—" his words were coming out faster and faster now, running together so fast. "The four… there's a colt, an eagle, a snake, and a lion cub. I can't make more. And I can't use the same memory for multiple, and those four memories…"

"Harry," the professor said, when he could get a word in edgewise. "Take a breath."

Harry stopped talking.

"You've cast multiple patroni at the same time? Please show me." That was all the prompting Harry needed. He pulled out his wand and flicked it, murmuring the charm in four quick successions. The four patroni tumbled out together. The colt pranced through the air, the eagle perched on the colt's head, and the snake was wrapped around the eagle's neck. The silver-gold lion cub wove in and out of the colt's leg. The little cub looked like he was enjoying life and having fun and just pure enjoyment. That enjoyment seemed to have seeped into Harry's face as he watched the four patroni dance around the room. "Oh," Remus said, "Have you named them?"

"No," Harry said, his eyes focused on the animals. "I was going to ask Paradise if she and her friends wanted to do it."

Remus sank into his chair with a content smile on his face. When he'd first talked with some of the other professors about their experiences with Harry, he'd been slightly worried about how the boy was handling his life. But for all he had experienced, Harry seemed to be a successful, caring student. And for what he was doing for Paradise Aster was beyond any of his expectations. Even Lily hadn't been that giving. "Be sure and leave yourself the option of a veto. Otherwise you'll end up with names like Flutterbunny."

The snake raised its head and hissed; his tongue was a marbled black-red. The other patroni did not respond. Harry laughed. "I think I'll call the snake Flutterbunny. He seems to like it." The snake hissed again. The boy and the professor just laughed. Harry flicked his wand and the four patroni vaporized. "Oh, and thanks for the Latin book," Harry stuffed his wand back into the little handmade holster – he'd seen a few of the older kids with holsters and wanted to buy one on his next trip to the ally… "It's been really helpful in understanding the various incantations."

"Good. Now Harry-"

"Um, professor," Harry said, seemingly not realizing the professor had spoken, "I've got to go to Diagon Ally, but I asked McGonagall and she said she'd have to ask Dumbledore, and Dumbledore said I could go if I had three staff supervisors, which makes no sense because Neville and I are just two kid and there's two hundred and three kids, but that's what he said, so I was wondering if you could go to Diagon Ally as a supervisor this weekend? Please? Well me… and Neville… and Mary… and Hermione, if she gets permission… and maybe Katie, but Dumbledore said no more than five."

Remus blinked. "What do you need in the ally?"

"Gringotts business, and trying to appease Mary as to my state as a nomah. So, shopping."

"A nomah?"

Harry snickered. "Oh, it's just another part of the vast knowledge of complicated socialness that I was missing out on. Will you please say yes?"

"Sure, Harry," Remus said. "I'd be honored."

"Awesome. Now, can I go? I've got homework for Transfiguration and McGonagall will kill me if it's not up to my new standard…"

"Go."

Harry nearly flew from the Defense classroom. In Merlin's name, that boy! Not knowing him beforehand, Remus had such little basis to judge things on, but the musings of Minerva and Aurora and pretty much everyone but Snape filled in most of the details. Seemingly all the staff could talk about was the positive change in Harry Potter. Some – mainly Poppy – worried that he'd burn himself out and become really sick, but others – Minerva and Aurora – were simply ecstatic in the change in him. Remus truly liked the boy. He truly wished… Well. If wishes were horses than beggars would ride. The defense professor buried himself in his grading, secretly looking forward to Saturday a little bit more than he should have.

o.o.o.o.o.o

By Thursday, on the third week of school and the first week of The-Official-Harry-Potter-Campaign-of-Ridiculous-Sociality (the ridiculous part had been a Draco Malfoy addition. Kenneth liked it, so it stuck. Draco had been so mad to hear someone make light of his supposedly sarcastic jabs.), Harry had taken to doing homework during meals and collapsing behind the closed curtains of his bed shortly before ten. He kept saying he needed time to adjust. New information, new schedules, it was overloading him. Harry sighed. He'd just have to get better.

At dinner, Thursday evening, Harry propped his Runes textbook against a hefty goblet. He absent-mindedly shoveled food into his mouth while only half nodding whenever Ron said something that sounded like a question. They had a test on some of these runes tomorrow—

"Harry!"

He looked up and gave Paradise a quick grin, shoveled in another mouthful of food, and tried to fix the difference between "wake" and "sleep" into his mind. For being opposite words, in structure the runes were annoyingly similar. In the corner of his eye, Harry caught Ron pause and look rather unhappy. The Quidditch babble stopped. "What's up, Paradise?" Harry asked, still hidden behind his book.

"We've got some name suggestions, but you promised we could see them!"

"How about tonight? I'll show you guys and Emma and… oh geez, whoever… when we're back in the dorm." It would take a while… probably longer than Harry wished, but they were girls and they were unexplainable. His suggestion was rewarded with a brilliant smile before Paradise bounced over to the Hufflepuff table. He could just barely see Paradise joining Lily, Vicky, and what looked like Diana and Harrietta. She seemed to be establishing a pretty good friend-base. Harry closed his book and turned to Ron. "So, you were analyzing the whole league?"

"Would you just cut it out?" Ron grumbled. "I'm not an idiot. I know you're avoiding me."

Harry even put down his fork. "What, Ron, what would you prefer?"

"Stop being ridiculous and good and popular! It won't end well."

"For whom, Ron," Harry challenged. "Whom could I possibly be hurting?"

"Me! Yourself! You could become too trusting and then someone would backstab you!"

Harry glared. "Merlin, Ron. It's not like I'm making friends with Malfoy. Would you just back off? I like my new friends. I like my new classes." That was mostly true. He was a bit bored with all the basic math of Arithmancy, but so were all the muggleborns. "Why can't you recognize that?"

Ron made a face. He looked like he'd just bitten a lemon. "When'd we stop being best mates? Why'd you become such great friends with Longbottom? He… he's Neville!"

He hadn't expected that. "What?" Harry managed. By now, Harry noticed that several people were observing the fight and trying to look like they weren't. It was really annoying. "You're really going to insult Neville? Do you have no sense, Ron? Nev's smart, and he's got information that I desperately need. If you can't recognize that, maybe we shouldn't be best mates." It wasn't as hard to say as he expected. But Ron…

The youngest male Weasley exploded. "So that's what you want? You just want to toss me aside for better, richer friends, is that it? You're just a git, Harry. A pointless, stuck-up git. Don't come crawling back to me when you're new mates let you down." He jumped up from the table and stomped away. Halfway down the table, he swung out and pushed Ginny. She shrieked and tumbled into Andy, who'd been sitting next to her. A prefect from Hufflepuff who was sitting on the other side of the aisle bounced up and grabbed Ron's arms, preventing him from moving. McGonagall was already racing down between the tables.

The whole hall was openly staring. Fred, George, Percy and Ginny's second year friends were standing up, all looking murderous. Before McGonagall could reach them, Ginny got to her feet, shakily. The hall was so quiet, everyone could catch her words. "Grow up, Ronald. In case you haven't noticed, we're not five anymore." She turned and walked sedately from the hall, but at the entrance hallway, a broken sob sounded and she broke into a run. Harry grabbed his textbook and got up, heading for the entrance hall. McGonagall closed her hand around Ron's upper arm and hissed at him. She pulled him from the hall. The whole hall was still openly staring.

Harry stopped by the other second years. "Do you know where she went?"

All the boys shook their heads, but Zia bit her lip. "Probably the Quidditch pitch. Are you going to talk to her?"

"Yeah."

Zia looked instantly relieved. "Good. Ron's awful; Ginny says."

As Harry finished the rest of the walk from the Great Hall, the conversations broke into a flurry of opinions and gossips. It was dark by the time he got outside. A few lanterns illuminated the walkway to the Quidditch pitch, but it wasn't far. True to Zia's prediction, the youngest Weasley stood in the middle of the stadium, her head bowed and her arms wrapped around herself. Harry dropped his bag by the edge of the field and walked over towards her. He made no attempt to disguise his sound. "Hey, Ginny."

"Hey." Her voice was still streaked with tears.

"I'm sorry for making him mad."

Ginny sniffed. "Not your fault. Why does he do it? We've fought before; like, physically, but never at Hogwarts or anything. I hate this school."

That surprised Harry. "What?"

Ginny turned to look at him. A few random lanterns cast rather eerie shadows over her face. "Well, what do you expect? I'm doing extra work in all my classes just to stay a caught up because I was inhabited by the Dark Lord last year. Zia, Andy, and the other Harry are really just my friends because they pity me! And then there's Ron and Percy and it's just awful. Why do I have to attend this awful school in the first place?"

Harry really didn't know how to respond. Sharing. Be personal about yourself. "You know, I don't think you're friends pity you. For one, I know Andy's really worried about you."

"What do you mean?"

"He asked me to talk to you," Harry said, desperately hoping that wasn't overstepping any boundaries. "They really are worried, Ginny. Have you tried talking to them about the chamber last year?"

She snorted and seemed to close together again. "No. What's there to talk about?"

"Ginny—"

"No, you know what, Harry. Let's just get back to the tower."

"Gin—"

"Stop it!" Ginny shrieked. "You've saved me once. I recognize I owe you a life debt. But can't you just leave me alone?" She whirled and ran away, racing back up towards the castle.

Harry stayed, cemented into the middle of the Quidditch pitch. When Andy had mentioned a problem, he hadn't known it was really this bad. He couldn't fathom why anyone would hate Hogwarts! It was so much better than the Dursleys. But then, Ginny hadn't grown up with the Dursleys. She'd been cared for and loved and probably a little spoiled all her life, not wealthy, sure, but loved. Did she not feel loved at Hogwarts? She certainly had a reason to not feel very safe… Harry bit his lip. Where there others around that disliked Hogwarts? He knew the school had some problems and all, but… but…

In the back corner of his mind, Harry felt the horrifying, dreadful touch of a dementor. He could hear his mother screaming, he could see the green light, Petunia with a frying pan— The patroni! Harry reached for his wand. He whispered the words as quickly as possible, desperately focusing on how it felt to fly. His colt wouldn't come. The boy shuddered and tried to cast the spell again. It didn't work. He grabbed his back and fled back to the castle, leaving the horrid, dark feelings behind on the Quidditch pitch.

The Great Hall wasn't empty, but it was emptier than before, with only about a dozen people scattered around each table. Harry didn't even enter the hall. He plodded away from the hall and up the many levels until reaching the port hole to the Gryffindor common room. The hallway was seemingly deserted. Harry sighed and gave the password to the Fat Lady. She tsked at him and swung open.

The gold and red common room was slightly subdued, but not an all-time low. The various second years were clustered together around one of the tables, but Ginny was still absent. Harry worked his way over to them and collapsed next to Andy with another sigh. "I didn't know it was that bad," Harry muttered.

"Yeah," Andy replied. They didn't need to say more. It was all understood.

After a few moments, Harry stood and headed towards one of the many corners. Hermione and Neville were talking with Able and Kenneth in their ordinary, slightly hushed tones. "You okay, Harry?" Hermione asked, when he sat down.

Harry shrugged and dove straight into Neville and Able's conversation. Hermione didn't push again, because she knew. He was not okay. He probably hadn't been for a very long time.

o.o.o.o.o.o

The patronus exhibition had been pushed to Friday evening. Ron had showed up to classes in a rotten mood and spent most of the day as far away from Harry as possible. Harry was – for once – grateful for Arithmancy and the starstuck attitude of his professor. He was acing the class, which only increased Vector's favoritism towards him. In general, it was rather frustrating. Still, Harry liked Arithmancy well enough. It had specific, definable rules, unlike Divination or getting along with people.

The common room on Friday night was buzzing with energy. All the first years – all twelve of them – had had the afternoon off, so they were seemingly more energetic than normal. Harry had a parchments spread out in front of him, writing an essay for Herbology on a specific species of magical plants. He had promised Paradise that when he'd finished this essay, but still, he couldn't help but be a little nervous. He hadn't managed the spell near the dementors and that was worrisome. What was the use of a spell if you couldn't manage it when it counted?

Still, Harry thought as he finished writing his conclusion, the spell made an excellent parlor trick when parlor tricks didn't mean much. Huh. He should get a book of Muggle magic tricks for Fred and George. Who knew the kind of chaos they could come up with when they started relying a little less on magic and more on ingenuity? Or something like that. Harry put down his quill and started counting. At three, he rolled up the piece of parchment and wrapped it with a piece of string. At seven, he had placed all parchments and books into his back. At ten, Paradise was standing by his arm, tugging at his sleeve and demanding to see the patroni. Harry let her pull over to a more open part of the ginormous common room. This had started out as just letting the first year girls name the silver animals! Now everyone wanted to see. The whole thing was exhausting.

But… Paradise, Lily and Victoria were so hard to refuse when they started begging… Harry pulled out his wand, rolled it between his fingers for a few seconds before looking down at the three girls. There was a whole crowd of Gryffindors ready to watch, but he could forget everyone else was here and just do it for his friends. "Imagine," Harry started, his voice low and whispery. He'd made up the script for his performance during the nights after the nightmares had woken him. Able and Neville, when asked whether it would be showmanship or boasting, had said go for as much dramatic flair as possible. "A lonely moor, you stand on the moor, a ghastly wind ripping at your head and shoulders. The cold air grabs your breath with a spindly hand and pulls it from you, leaving you gasping, and still so alone."

The girls stared, eyes wide. "In the distance, you see a silvery shadow moving across the moor. Could it be your salvation? Could it free you from this icy, wind caked moor? The shadow dances closer. You see it now, clearly, as a young silver horse. Expecto patronum," and out from his wand sprung the silvery colt. He pranced through the air, tossing his head with a regal, aloof beauty. Everyone stared, captivated. Harry let the colt play for a few more minutes before reclaiming his audience's attention. "Imagine a seaside cliff top. The moon is full, and in the forest behind you, you can hear the wolves howl." Vicky winced – he'd have to find out why later.

Harry filed that fact away and plunged back into the description. "Below you, the water crashes again and again against the ageless rock. It strikes you, just how old the world is. Just how powerful the ocean can be. Just how wonderful it is to live. And still, you can't but think how nice it would be to step over the cliff and fall… fall… fall…" The older listeners seemed to hold a collective breath, all waiting for what would happen. "Yet from the moon comes forth a silver figure. Ancient and magnificent all the same, swooping down from the heavens on high. Expecto patronum," Harry raised his wand above his head, which gave the silver eagle enough space to swoop down and graze over Paradise's outstretched fingers. The eagle swooped around the room a few times and then opened his mouth in a soundless cry. "It is no albatross—" Able had insisted on that line, but Harry didn't know why, "—for saving your life.

"Imagine," Harry began, when the eagle came to rest on his shoulder, "the perfect garden, a utopia of peace. A haven from pain and worry and grief. You stand with people from across the world, all seeking to relieve a burden they bare. They are afraid of a serpent in a tree. They call it names and stay away from it. You do not. You do not fear the serpent. You approach the tree and ask the Serpent the burden it wants to leave behind." Harry took a deep breath. He felt like collapsing into a little ball and never coming out again. There was so much attention fixed on him! "Expecto patronum. The snake hisses words that only you understand." He hissed a single word in parseltongue. The patronus snake slithered over the ground, fake snapping at people's feet. None of the first years flinched. Everyone else looked at least slightly guilty. "The snake tells you that it has no burdens to relieve but the burden of fear. The snake fears the pain and grief that he has inflicted on mankind, but they will not allow him apologize. You are the first."

It's just a story, Harry reminded himself, just finish the story. "Imagine, you are curled into a cupboard. You do not move. There is a lock on the cupboard door, you can't get out. It's dark in the cupboard, peaceful. It's an escape from the outside world. In the cupboard, you can dare to dream that maybe there is something more to the world than the constant pain and hurt that you know too well." Paradise's eyes were wider than anyone else's. "Just pause and imagine what it would feel like to have one friend, one confidant, one protector. Expecto patronum," Harry whispered. The lion cub bounded from his wand and headed straight for a slightly shivering Paradise. He nosed the girl's hand and – when she granted permission – curled into her lap. Or so it seemed, the patronus was no more tangible than a ghost. "Just imagine what it feels like to be loved and protection is never far away." As he raised his wand, the four patronus gathered together in the air above Harry. They swirled and blew away in a hiss of flowing, silver mist.

Harry lowered his wand. The story was over and he had no idea of how it would be received… On the ground, Lily, Vicky and the other first year girls just looked astonished. Paradise looked sad and happy and lonely and comforted all at the same time. The other students looked anywhere from awed to thoughtful. Emma had leaned against William and was wiping away a tear. What? It wasn't… sad, just… the truth. No one said anything for a long time.

"Harry," Hermione whispered, "is it possible for you to not be honest? The cupboard—"

"That came from my own experiences," Harry replied, looking straight at his friend. He didn't drop eye contact with her until enough time had passed for the other students to stop reacting. Hermione offered him a short nodded before turning away, her shoulders unbelievably tense. Taking a deep breath, Harry looked down at the first year girls.

One of the girls he didn't really know was the first to squeal. "That was so cool! Can you call them out again?"

Harry let himself relax. It took him a few moments, but he managed to call all four patroni back to the Gryffindor common room. "Did you think of names?"

Lily nodded. "We all did. Diane and Harrietta and even Siân helped! But it's hard to choose only three," the girl said… "Do you think you'll ever make more?"

"Maybe," Harry said, sitting down on the ground across from her. "They are built on good memories." By then, some of those not so involved in the naming process had drifted away, back to homework or whatever kept them busy. "And, I know I said four, but Flutterbunny likes his name." The snake curled around Harry's forearm, his mouth open in a silent his. The girls grinned. "So tell me your suggestions."

"Well, the Hufflepuffs think you should name the one Ceridwen," said Lily, "and Aria suggested we name at least one after one of the constellations we've been learning about in astronomy. "Lyra, I think." Lily looked at the blond girl who'd seemed so eager to see the patroni again.

"Lyra," Aria affirmed, "or Sculpture, if you looking for a male name."

"The eagle should be named Coleridge," Hermione suggested, offhandedly. The first year girls stared at her, like she had gone mad. Able and Kenneth grinned. "What?" Hermione smirked, "I can't help it if they don't read."

"Not Coleridge," Lily and Vicky said, in unison.

Harry settled back, waiting for a very long Friday night to end. Of the twelve Gryffindor first years, there were only five boys, so Lily, Vicky and Paradise were joined in plotting by Aria, Emerald, Julia, and Romilda. All the names were making Harry's head spin. It took over an hour, but the girls and Harry finally agreed on Orion for the colt (it satisfied Aria's request and Vicky loved it), Aegisa for the lion cub (whom they decided was decidedly female and Aegis just wasn't enough), Caradoc for the eagle (a suggestion of Lily's that she said would be Welsh enough for their Hufflepuff friends), and Flutterbunny the snake. Orion, Caradoc, Flutterbunny, and Aegisa seemed immensely satisfied with their names when Harry finally let them shift back into nothingness.

Emma hurried the first years off to bed and Harry gathered his things, retreating to his dormitory before Able or Kenneth or Hermione could lay siege and keep him up for any longer. He had the trip to Diagon Ally the next day and while Hermione hadn't managed to get a specially signed notice from her parents in time, Katie was still coming along to keep the three nomahs from completely over spending. Which was what the professors were supposed to do, but no one really trusted the professor's ability to not spoil poor-abused-little-must-be-loved-Boy-Who-Lived-Harry-Potter. Not that Harry minded.

It didn't take long for Harry to prepare for bed, but Ron was standing in the middle of the dorm room, obviously waiting for him. "What is it, Ron?" There wasn't anyone else in the room. Neville was still downstairs, probably talking with Able or plotting out some last minute financial details with Emma and Mary and some of the noahs… And Harry honestly had no idea what Dean or Seamus was doing.

"You just have to show off," Ron grumbled. "You can't stand not having the attention." His arms were crossed over his chest and he looked redder than a tomato. Harry sagged; he just wanted sleep! He just wanted dreamless, uninterrupted sleep. He didn't want to deal with Ron. He didn't want to deal with the nightmares, but neither would go away! It was frustrating beyond believe. "Golden boy," Ron sneered, "golden boy Harry. You probably are glad your parents died. It gives you all the fame."

Harry was too mad to know what he was doing. All he could see was the jeering face of his ex-friend. Definitely ex-friend. At that moment, there was nothing Ronald Weasley could do to befriend Harry Potter. In reality, Harry didn't do anything. He just stood, frozen, to the threshold of their dormitory as Ron yelled at him. The rant was wordless, soundless as it cracked down over Harry's voided emotions. He didn't know how long it continued for. He didn't see Colin Creevey popping out of the second year boys' dorms and racing down the stairs for a prefect. He didn't quite grasp his surroundings.

"Potter!" Ron screeched, at Harry's lack of response to his hurtful comments. "Potter, I'm talking to you!" His right hook came at an unfortunate time. It smacked Harry in the eye, but just as William, Percy, Oliver and the other seventh year boy came into view. Harry didn't even bother to stand his ground. Ron's punch drove him across the landing and into the other wall. Oliver grabbed Ron and kept him from pouncing on the fallen Harry. William helped Harry stand while Percy dove into berating his younger brother. Oliver and Percy escorted Ron down the stairs.

"You okay, Harry?" William asked.

Harry shrugged. He groped for the door to the third year's dorm. "Just tired…"

"Hospital wing?" The boy that Harry didn't know suggested.

"No, Eric," William sighed. "He probably needs sleep more than anything else." Neville, Able and Kenneth had made their way up the stairs, and behind them clustered Emma and some of the other older girls. They let Dean and Seamus push through the crowd and join their roommates.

Harry stumbled into his bed, not even bothering to wrap the curtains around his bed before his head touched the pillow. He was just too tired…

"Sorry, Harry."

"Ron's just… well…"

"We'll see if you guys don't have to share a room anymore."

"Sleep well, mate."

The last thing Harry was aware of was Neville pulling closed the curtain around his bed.