So this is based off of a prompt for a Hudson family dinner from Dee (or iheartfinnyd on Tumblr) and I hope I didn't ruin what you had in mind. Let me know what you think!
September 22nd, 2035
It was late when Rachel arrived home to the smell of delicious food wafting through the air, infiltrating her nostrils and making her realize just how hungry she was. It was like in those old cartoons where the character was drawn to the source of the smell by the lines indicating the wafting. Rachel wasn't even sure her feet had moved her when she floated through the dining room, which had been set up for six, and into the kitchen to find her entire family cooking.
Finn was manning the lasagna that she would not be consuming in the oven while Roxy was chopping vegetables on the counter. Liam was at the stove flipping over little pieces of zucchini while Zach tossed a salad and Ian poured drinks. Goober and Tinker stood around waiting for scraps of food and were so excited by the prospect of a dropped carrot that neither greeted Rachel like they usually did. Rachel felt like she was in the twilight zone. The only time she'd ever seen her husband and all their offspring cooking together was, oh, never.
Sure sometimes she'd come home to find Finn awake waiting to have a nice quiet dinner with her which usually meant he wanted some nice not-so-quiet sex with her after or she'd come home to find cookies baked by Roxanne spelling out the question she wanted an answer to such as 'Can I spend the night at Addy's?'. As for the boys, they could barely work a toaster much less make a meal. This was peculiar indeed.
"Hello everyone. What's going on?" Rachel asked suspiciously when she entered the kitchen and disrupted her silent family's thoughts.
Finn stood up straight and smiled at Rachel. "Hey baby, we're making you dinner."
"I can see that. Why?" Rachel blinked at him.
"Because we wanted to. Does there have to be a reason to make dinner?" Finn chewed on his lip as his eyes darted between his children's faces.
"Generally. The kids are usually in bed by now. It's after midnight." Rachel crossed her arms over her chest.
"I figured since it's the weekend they could stay up so we could all have dinner together. We made vegan lasagna for you." Finn smiled broadly as he bent back down to the oven to pull the lasagna out.
Now Rachel was really suspicious. There was almost never an entirely vegan meal made in her house. There had to be a catch.
"Mom, why don't you go change into your pajamas or something while we finish up dinner? It should be ready soon," Roxy said wearing the same expression as Finn. There was definitely something up. Rachel just couldn't place her finger on it.
"Fine. Let me know when it's ready," Rachel replied before leaving the kitchen to go upstairs. Finn and Roxy watched her go.
"You think she's on to it?" Roxy asked Finn who was carrying the lasagna to the table.
Finn's face twitched nervously as he thought about it. "She probably realizes something is up. At least she didn't come in screaming at me like she has the last few nights. Liam, you're going to burn those." He walked over to his son and turned the burner down on the zucchini. "Go help Ian carry the drinks out to the table. I don't need him spilling them and giving your mother any more reason to be pissy."
Liam did as was told and minutes later the table was covered in food and Finn was calling Rachel downstairs. The kids were all seated with smiles plastered on their faces and Finn was waiting by Rachel's chair to help her into it. It all seemed very Stepford, which was ironic as she was the wife.
Rachel sat down and Finn moved over to his chair. "So, uh, dig in!"
None of the boys touched the food as they all hated eating vegan. "Dad, I don't want this," Ian whined as he stared distastefully at the lasagna Rachel was lifting a piece out of.
Finn forced a smile at his youngest child. "Ian, remember what we said? This dinner is for Mom and you are going to eat it." He cut a piece out and plopped it on his plate. Before the other two could protest, he did the same.
Rachel raised her eyebrow. Finn never forced them to eat anything they didn't want to. That was her job, so why was he doing so now?
"Finn if he doesn't want to eat it he doesn't have to," she said, playing his part.
"Yes he does Rach. We're eating a nice family meal that everyone can eat for once. Totally meat-less and animal byproduct free." Finn dug into his own piece of lasagna and Rachel could tell he really wanted to spit it back out onto his plate but he soldiered on and swallowed.
"While I appreciate the gesture, it wasn't necessary. You could have made something with meat for the kids. You usually do anyway."
Roxy entered the conversation. "We wanted to make something special just for you since you've been so stressed out lately. All week you've been so upset over something and we just wanted to try to make you happy again, show you we appreciate you and love you." She half-smiled at Rachel.
Rachel smiled back at her before turning to Finn. "So that's what this is about? You're trying to get me back on my good side?" She narrowed her eyes at Finn who looked away guiltily. "Oh Finn, I think it'll take a little more than a vegan lasagna to do that, but thanks for trying. I do like my vegan lasagna."
She took a bite off her fork and happily chewed her tasty treat. Everyone else ate it like it was plastic.
"So how was school yesterday?" Rachel asked to none of her children in particular. She just expected one of them to continue the conversation.
"They made me play soccer," Liam spoke up. "Mr. Harrison knows I hate running and he wouldn't let me play as the goalie."
"That's why he wouldn't let you play goalie…because he knows you wanted to. Mr. Harrison is a dick like that," Finn said into his food.
"Finn! Language!" Rachel scolded.
"What? He is! He even does that with adults. Harrison always takes my favorite chair in the teacher's lounge just because he knows it's my favorite." Finn couldn't stand the phys. ed. teacher, if he could be called that, at Wilson. He was a lazy, fat, old man who enjoyed squashing the fun and joy out of everything and thought drinking Diet Pepsi alone would help him lose the spare tire around his waist. Never mind that he ate two Big Macs, a large fry and a chocolate milkshake every day for lunch, that Diet Pepsi was going to work. Yeah, and Finn had dwarfism.
Rachel furrowed her brow at him and molded her lips into a tight line of disapproval. "Even if that is so there is no reason to use that kind of language around our children Finn. You know how Ian likes to repeat things he shouldn't." She turned her attention back to Liam. "Liam, I know you don't like sports but you have to at least try when it comes to gym class. You get graded on your effort and if you at least show that you're trying then you'll do fine. So even if you don't get to be goalie and you never even touch the ball make it seem like you're into the game."
Liam shook his head and played with the food on his plate. He had perfected the trick of merely moving the food around to make it look like he'd actually eaten and when that didn't work he snuck pieces to Goober whose head was conveniently located right in his lap and waiting to eat whatever Liam gave him. He knocked a piece of the lasagna into the napkin in his lap and Goober sucked it up from there.
"Zach, Ian, Roxy, how was school for you?" Rachel inquired. They hardly ever had family dinners like this so it was nice to be able to sit down and actually discuss their lives with each other…even if by force.
Roxy just shrugged while Ian laid his head on the table. Rachel was about to tell him to get his head off the table when Zach began speaking. "I decided what instrument I want to play next year in band!" he burst out excitedly.
"Oh that's great Zach! What did you pick?" Rachel beamed at her child.
"I want to play the drums like Dad." He was so distracted by his thoughts of being a badass drummer that he forgot he hated the lasagna he was being forced to eat and took a bite. Zach choked on it a little before forcing himself to swallow.
"Zach, are you sure that's the instrument you want to play? No offence dear but you have no rhythm." Rachel looked at Finn who just chuckled. He knew exactly why Zach wanted to be a percussionist.
"So? You don't need rhythm to pick up chicks. If the girls see you with drumsticks in your back pocket, they come to you," he explained. Rachel's mouth fell open as she understood why he wanted to play the drums. What eight year old talked that way that didn't have the last name Puckerman? How did their son end up the player?
Finn decided to add to the conversation. "He's got a point. My drum face still turns you on," he said to Rachel who blushed slightly at the thought. "Hey Ian, did you decide what you wanted to do for your birthday yet? It's less than a week away now."
Ian just shrugged. Finn could tell he was tired and probably just wanted to go to bed. "Can we go to the aquarium?" he asked looking up at Finn finally.
"We went there last year. You want to go again?" he asked somewhat surprised. The kid could go anywhere on his day yet he wanted to go someplace he'd been dozens of times before. He just shook his head. "If that's where you want to go, we can go."
"Well, I'm done now and I'm quite tired so I'm just going to clean off my plate and head to bed. Goodnight family!" Roxy said trying to avoid having to droll on about her boring Friday at school.
"Hey Miss High School, sit down." Roxy cursed her luck and plopped back down in her seat after her mother wouldn't allow her to leave. "How was school? Make any new friends?"
Rachel asked Roxy that every time they talked about school. Roxy didn't understand why her mother wanted her to make new friends. She liked her old friends and they were good people. Both of her parents liked her friends.
"No. Still got the same ones, Addy and Kylie," she replied with some attitude. Rachel looked disappointed.
"Don't you want to try to branch out a little? I realize you love Addy and Kylie as do we but you should try spending time with some more people. You might find friends in people you'd never expect."
"Oh like how you and Dad met? Are you suggesting I join glee club? You know I can't sing." It was the honest truth. Roxy couldn't carry a tune in a bucket and forget dancing. She had two left feet and Finn's awkward coordination. Finn was considered a better dancer than her which was saying something because he was awful.
"No, you don't need to try singing. I'd prefer if you didn't. I don't need people knowing that I produced a child that can't sing or dance at all. But I'm saying maybe you should join a sports team or yearbook or mock UN, something other than the art club. Who knows, maybe you'll meet your future husband." Rachel looked at her daughter and shook her head up and down slightly.
Finn snorted. "Roxy, don't let her push you around. You have to do what you feel is right no matter what anyone else thinks. If you just want to be in art club that's fine. If you want to join the glee club even though you sing and dance worse than a polar bear, go for it. As long as you're happy and not hearing wedding bells yet." He smiled at her while she glared at him.
"Thank you for comparing me to a polar bear Dad. I appreciate it," she replied with dry sarcasm.
He gave her the thumbs up.
"Finn, why would you say that to her?" Rachel stared him down with disbelief.
"Because…she…should…be able to do whatever she wants to do without feeling pressure from you," he replied hesitantly, ending the sentence sounding like a question.
Rachel shook her head and closed her eyes. "Not that, the thing about the polar bear. That was mean Finn."
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be mean. I was just kidding."
"And I bet you loved it when Jesse compared your singing and dancing to that of a 'zombie who has to poop'," Rachel air quoted the last few words. All the kids started giggling as Finn's face hardened at the memory.
"Okay, I get it I'm sorry. What do you want me to say, I'm sorry!" Finn looked at Roxy. "Roxanne, you sing and dance lovely. I'm sorry I compared you to a polar bear." He looked back at Rachel. "There are you happy now Rachel?"
Finn threw his fork down onto his plate with an angry clatter and just stared at Rachel. He knew he shouldn't have made fun of her singing and dancing but he also knew Roxy. She didn't truly take offence to it, she joked about her horrendous moves and voice with him quite frequently.
The mood in the room shifted then. It had been mostly jovial despite the fact Rachel had been mad at Finn all week and he knew it. Now it seemed that the frustration Rachel had with Finn for that evening was finally surfacing.
Finn had had enough. They needed to settle the problem once and for all so they could get past it because clearly not talking about it wasn't helping. "Rachel, what do you want me to do to apologize that I haven't already done? How many times can I say I'm sorry?"
The kids' interests were all piqued. They had known all week that their mother was pissed at their father and that had been part, most, of the reason for making her dinner but they weren't entirely sure why she was mad at him. She had simply gone around slamming doors on things and ignoring Finn while being snippy when she had to talk to him. Rachel didn't yell or give him the silent treatment but it was still obvious she was furious at him.
"I just want you to admit you were wrong! You shouldn't have gone behind my back like that Finn! That was something life shaping that could have severely changed her personality," Rachel said as she stood up from the table and carried her plate into the kitchen. Finn followed her and the kids remained at the table watching them with rapt attention.
"I highly doubt that could have changed her personality. She'd still be the same person," Finn countered.
Rachel threw the plate in the sink and turned to face Finn with her hand on her hip. "Do you think I'd be the same person if I had been named Monica or Phoebe? Or you, if you had been named Christopher or something? Our name does shape who we are Finn whether you believe that or not."
"Rachel, I don't see why it matters. You gave me permission to name her Roxanne anyway!" Finn yelled, throwing his hands in the air.
Liam, Zach and Ian all turned to stare at Roxy who was just as confused as they were. Had their parents been arguing over her all week? Roxy needed to get to the bottom of this. She stood up and took the remaining plates and silverware into the kitchen to deposit them in the sink.
"Mom, Dad, what exactly have you been arguing about all week?" Roxy asked slowly, looking between her parents who stared at each other.
Rachel turned to look at her daughter. "Well, Roxanne, apparently your father had been keeping a secret from me since the day you were born and now that I know about it thanks to Puck he won't admit that he was wrong!" Rachel stormed past Finn and back into the dining room to start picking up the remaining food dishes.
Roxy looked to her father hoping he'd be able to elaborate. Finn rubbed his temple then explained. "A week before you were born we found out you were going to be a girl and we started arguing over what to name you-"
"I know that already Dad." Finn stared her down. "Sorry, continue."
"Anyway, we were arguing over what to name you because your mother wanted to name you Fanny," Roxy started laughing until she saw her mother's expression then quickly stopped, "my thoughts exactly, so she wanted to name you Fanny but I wanted to name you Roxanne. Your mother didn't want to name you Roxanne though. Well, even after you had been born we still hadn't decided on a name for you yet. When the nurse took you to the nursery I followed you because of your mother's paranoia that they'd end up giving you to the wrong family or something and the nurse commented that you didn't have a name. I made a decision then. I told her your name was Roxanne and then made it official on your birth certificate…without your mother's permission."
Rachel strolled back into the kitchen. "Yes, and he hid that fact from me for over 14 years! It doesn't matter that I gave him permission after he manipulated my emotions-"
"Manipulated your emotions?" Finn balked at her statement. "Rachel, I didn't even know you were awake when I was holding her and talking to her! It's not my fault you thought it was adorable and decided to let me name her."
Rachel looked away angrily. "Still, if I had known what you did, I would not have let you get your way! Plus, you lied to me about it for 14 years! What happened to no more lying, huh?"
"Rachel, I didn't tell you because it didn't matter. She was named Roxanne either way! I didn't want to upset you over it."
"Well I am upset!" Rachel screeched at him causing Goober and Tinker who'd been in the kitchen still begging for scraps to run for the hills. "You had no right to do that."
Roxy felt the need to intervene. "Does it count at all that I like my name? I'd much rather be named Roxanne than Fanny."
Finn and Rachel both looked at Roxy who was shying away under her mother's harsh gaze. "I bet you wouldn't like it so much if you knew what you were named after," Rachel threatened.
Roxy raised her eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"You're familiar with the song Roxanne by The Police correct?" Roxy shook her head. "You're named after the prostitute in that song." Roxy's eyes widened and her mouth fell open in shock. Finn face palmed.
"I'm named after a prostitute?" Roxy shouted at Finn accusingly. Rachel smugly smirked at Finn.
Finn tried to explain. "You're not named after the damn prostitute in the song. That song is just the first place I heard the name Roxanne and I liked it. I didn't even know the song was about a prostitute when I first heard it!" He glared at Rachel who glared right back. "Why would you tell her that?"
"I'm sorry, was that another one of your little secrets you wanted to keep hidden forever? Oh let me guess, you didn't want Liam to know that you were the one who broke his cello either, right?" Rachel asked innocently.
"You broke my cello?" Liam screeched as he entered the kitchen. He stared up at Finn angrily who looked back down at him sympathetically. "I have to share a school cello with Andy Hannigan because you broke my cello?"
"It was an accident buddy. I didn't mean to. I thought I closed the latches on the case right but when I was carrying it out to the car they popped open and it fell out and the neck cracked. I'm paying to get it fixed aren't I?"
"But it's going to take weeks to fix!" Liam looked on the verge of tears. His cello was his most prized possession and he had been devastated when he learned it was broken. He frequently talked about beating up the guy who snapped his cello neck in half if they ever found him.
"I'm really sorry Liam. I didn't mean to," Finn apologized. He knew Liam would be hurt and pissed off at him if Finn had told him that he had been the one who broke the cello so he fibbed a little and said that when he picked it up from school and brought it home and found it cracked it must have been someone at school. Of course he told Rachel the truth knowing she'd understand but now he was severely regretting that. He hated the look Liam was giving him.
Finn glared at Rachel but she was just getting started. "And what about Zach? I'm guessing you don't want him to know that you left him in the car alone for fifteen minutes in a parking garage?"
Now Finn was livid. "That was not just my fault! You were there too!"
"I was in labor! I could barely remember my own name much less anything else! It was your responsibility to make sure Roxy, Liam and Zach were taken care of while I was giving birth," Rachel roared back at him.
"You left me in the car by myself? I could have died or been kidnapped!" Zach walked into the kitchen looking shocked.
"But you weren't kidnapped! And it was September! It wasn't like the car was 110 degrees and it wasn't even that cold, plus you had a jacket on. I remembered I left you out there eventually. You were asleep, you didn't even notice," Finn explained to his still shocked son. He turned his frustration back to his wife. "I get that you're pissed at me but why are you making the kids pay for it?"
"Because I don't like keeping secrets in this house, Finn. They always come back to haunt us and I want to clear the air. So there's just one more." Finn was nervous now. What the hell was she going to say?
"Don't you think it's time we told Ian he was an accident?" she asked spitefully. Finn just shook his head at her. He couldn't believe she was doing this. Be mad at him sure, but by revealing this information she was stressing out the kids and making them feel bad.
Ian walked into the kitchen then. Finn looked down at him as he spoke. "I was an accident?"
"Yes, Ian. You were an accident," Rachel answered.
His lower lip trembled slightly. "Does that mean that you…don't want me?"
Rachel's mouth fell open. "No, sweetie, not at all." She looked around at all her kids who looked like they wanted to cry or punch something. What had she done? "Ian, baby, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She pulled him in for a hug. "Dad and I love you very much and so do Roxy and Liam and Zach. Just because you were unexpected doesn't mean you were unwanted." Rachel ran her fingers through his hair as a single tear rolled down his cheek. "Okay? Don't ever think that?"
"Way to go, Rach. You made him cry. Congratulations, you managed to make everyone in the house feel awful all because you were mad at me and couldn't just let something that happened over 14 years ago go!" Finn said, voice rising at his annoyance with his wife. He loved Rachel no matter what but sometimes she still acted like a child and it was ridiculous. Now Finn had to do damage control. "Roxanne, I promise you, you are not named after the prostitute. I would never name my child after a prostitute. Jasmine is named after a prostitute, not you."
Rachel looked at Finn like he was bonkers. "Jasmine is named after the Aladdin character."
Finn looked at Rachel with a false smile. "You and Anjali keep thinking that. Liam, I feel horrible about breaking your cello. I only lied because I knew how upset you'd get at me and I didn't want to feel like I'd let you down. I'm sorry." Liam still looked really upset.
"Zach, I'm sorry I left you in the car. You know I can forget things easily and to be fair, your mom was distracting me by being in labor with Ian. But, I mean, come on. You gotta admit it's kinda funny…no? Okay," Finn trailed off his laughter at his son and Rachel's expression at saying it was kinda funny. He didn't think Zach would be so upset over that. It's not like he was actually abducted.
Then Finn turned to Ian. He could tell his youngest was trying really hard not to cry even more but his exhaustion mixed with finding out he wasn't actually supposed to exist seemed to be winning out. He knelt down to look Ian in his face.
"Ian, though your mother is insane, she's right. We all love you so much and just because we didn't plan on getting you that does not mean we aren't happy about it. You're awesome dude; we wouldn't be the same without you."
"I'd have my own room," Zach replied a little bitterly. Finn gave him a stern look.
"Actually you wouldn't, you'd be sharing with Liam. Anyway, Ian do you understand?" Finn continued.
Ian swallowed hard but shook his head. "So I'm like a surprise?" he asked hesitantly.
"Exactly. You were a surprise and one that everyone was excited about," Rachel added in, kneeling down too.
"Speak for yourself," Roxy grumbled.
"Roxanne," Rachel warned, whipping her head around to glare at her eldest child who just smiled back innocently.
Finn hugged Ian then stood up again. He looked at Rachel who stood too. "So it's all out in the open now. Anything else you want to share?"
Rachel looked a little sheepish. She felt bad for upsetting her kids so much just to get to Finn and it wasn't right. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for saying all that stuff. It wasn't very adult of me and I'm sorry if I hurt anyone's feelings. Roxy, you are not named after a prostitute, Liam, Zach, those were both accidents and your dad really does feel bad about it, Ian, I'm sorry I broke that news to you so harshly. Finn, while I still think you were wrong for naming Roxanne without my consent, I suppose it doesn't really matter after all this time. Like you said, she would have been named Roxanne either way. I apologize for my behavior."
Finn glanced between his kids and Rachel. "Apology accepted." He stuck his hand out and Rachel shook it before Finn pulled her in for a big hug. "Come here," Finn called to his children who he forced to join in on a group hug.
Though dinner had ended with a little turbulence it worked out for the best. Rachel did have a point about not wanting to keep secrets in the house. It just complicated everything. Did that mean Finn was going to tell his kids what he and Rachel do with the contents of the locked drawer in the dresser in his closet, hell no, but communication was key and that was what Rachel had been getting at.
"Okay Hudsons, I say it's time for bed," Rachel called out from the middle of the group hug. "It's way past all your bedtimes and you need to get some sleep. Thank you all for my vegan dinner though. We should have a purely vegan meal as a family more often."
Finn, Roxy, Liam, Zach and Ian all let out a collective groan at the suggestion.
"Mom, we like meat," Roxy announced as the group hug fell apart.
"Mmm…meat," everyone else said at once.
"Yes, I'm aware. Now come on everyone. Off to bed! Goodnight," Rachel pointed toward the hall that would lead to their rooms. They all shuffled off after Rachel kissed them goodnight but she tugged Finn back to her before he could leave the kitchen and pulled him down for a big wet kiss.
"Does this mean you aren't mad at me anymore?" he asked with a smirk.
"No, the sex we can have tonight means I'm not mad at you anymore," Rachel said saucily as she ran her fingers across Finn's stomach and walked toward the hall.
He turned around and stared after Rachel who glanced back at him biting her lip before leaving the kitchen. Finn's pants already felt tighter.
"I love make up sex," he mumbled as he quickly followed Rachel.