Thanatopsis

Chapter Nine

McGee was a little worried about going to see Daniel. To be extremely honest, he was scared; he had never stared impending death in the face before. He hoped it wasn't…. well, he didn't really know what to expect.

He looked over at Tony, sitting at his desk with his feet up in the air. He was staring blankly at his computer. The sky behind him was black. They were waiting to go to the stakeout they were currently conducting. It was only the second day, but they were all exhausted. It was that soul sucking sensation of staring at an empty screen for hours upon end, wishing something would appear, no matter how mundane, because at least it would be more interesting than what you were doing before. And, unfortunately, he and Tony, had drawn the short straw; and by the short straw, he meant that Gibbs bullied them into volunteering for the night shift. Seven in the evening to seven in the morning.

They had opted to go home that morning, instead of back to work, which was the reason they had to show up three hours early to do their reports. Nothing had come of it yet, but, at least he hoped, it was bound to happen eventually. McGee yawned widely. It was only six in the evening; nonetheless, he had only gotten five hours of sleep today. Even though it was clearly in the job description, it was hard to change your sleeping schedule on command.

The phone rang suddenly from Tony's desk, causing Tony, who had nearly fallen asleep, to jump so violently that he tumbled out of his chair. He gave a low, pathetic keen as he sat up and reached for the phone. McGee burst out laughing.

"DiNozzo," he said, giving McGee the finger. Then his head snapped straight and he smiled. "Really," he asked the phone. "Yes, Boss."

He stood up, dropped the phone into the base, and moseyed over to McGee's desk, "Guess what?"

McGee rolled his eyes, immediately getting over his previous amusement. "Not in the mood, Tony."

"Well, you will be when you hear my news."

McGee looked up. "Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah," Tony said, waggling his eyebrows.

McGee waited. And waited. "And?"

"Gibbs and Ziva caught the guy. Stakeouts over." He was practically bouncing with excitement. There was obviously more.

"And?"

"It's that girl."

"What girl?"

"That girl that we saw on our first night."

"The large one with the giant plastic surgery scar on the side of her face."

"What—no. The hot blonde with the big—" he dropped his hands from the lewd gesture he was formulating.

"Tony, you can say – "

Tony slapped him on the back of the head. "Hi, Director."

McGee rose up swiftly and turned around.

Vance narrowed his eyes, knowingly. "Good evening. Any news on the case?"

Tony stood straighter. "Caught the guy – er – girl. Michelle Ghalliger. Gibbs and Ziva are bringing her in right now."

"Ummhmm. I'll expect a full report on my desk tomorrow morning." He turned and headed towards the elevator on his way home.

McGee sat back down and let his head fall onto the top of his desk in frustration.

The drive to the hospital the next morning was relatively uneventful. It gave McGee time to think. Sure, he was glad to finally have someone who might be able to explain what was happening to him, but without cause to think about his new found - whatever it was, it had almost left his mind. He didn't have to think about Tony's forthcoming death. He didn't have to think about Dianne or where she was now. He no longer had to remember the look in her mother's eyes when he had conveyed to her her daughter's last words. He had felt fine after everything had occurred – surprisingly, it wasn't the whole 'psychic' thing that got to him – but lately… it had all been building up in his head. He hated going home to his quiet apartment, because the only thing he could do there was think. At least with the stakeout going on he was too worn out to lay awake and dwell on the past month. There were too many big questions that he could not stop asking himself. Whatever it was he had, it sure as hell didn't feel like a gift.

Thankfully it was a Saturday morning and he had to explain to no one where he was going. He had considered telling Tony, but thought better of it. Tony would insist on coming, and Tim didn't think Ducky would want him to give away the secret he'd been doing so well at keeping from all of them. Regardless of whether Tim thought he needed to or not. He was just glad that Ducky had confided in somebody.

McGee pulled up to the hospital and parked in the nearly empty lot. It was six-thirty in the morning, after all. He had to wait another ten minutes for Ducky to arrive for they had arranged to go in together. He waved when he saw his car. While McGee was altogether unprepared, the doctor brought him coffee and what smelled like a cinnamon roll in a white paper bag. He directed McGee to the enclosed courtyard to eat their breakfast.

"Sorry I couldn't come before this Ducky."

"I understand, my boy. You were on the job." He patted him on the back. "There is no rush."

They were sitting on a low stone wall, facing the glass doors that to the parking lot. Even though the courtyard had walls around it, the brisk morning breeze somehow made its way through. They were quiet as they ate, lost in their own thoughts.

"This is kind of an odd situation, isn't it?" McGee asked at last.

Ducky looked over at him and smiled. "Yes, it is."

McGee smiled back. He placed his coffee on the stone beside him. "How are you handing all this, Duck?"

He closed his eyes, giving himself time to think. "I don't know. Daniel and I have been through so much together. We were in the same unit for basic training. He was just a soldier and I a surgeon, but during those four months, we became the best of friends." He looked up to the sky, quietly ruminating.

"So you've kept in touch since then?"

"Oh, yes. It has been a very long time." He chuckled, quietly. "You know, our relationship reminds me of you and Anthony. Yes. Of course, as close as you two are, it could rival me and Daniel."

McGee laughed. "I find that very hard to believe."

"I don't." Ducky took another sip. "Now, I believe I am entitled to ask you how you are handling what you saw with young Anthony."

McGee gave an uneasy hum and sighed. "I don't know. I'm not exactly freaking out. Yet." He ran his hand through his hair. "It's just…. It's not going well. I'm dreaming about a lot. Sometimes it turns out good, sometimes, exactly like it went down in my vision. And sometimes… it's so, so much worse."

Ducky nodded. "Indeed, to know the future is a terrible burden. And as you said before, it is not one we mere mortals should have to bear. It is a weight on our humanity. However, if I am to be completely honest, I think that you wouldn't have seen it if there was nothing you could do about it. I believe the saying is 'everything happens for a reason.'"

That jerked McGee into attention. "I hadn't really thought of it that way." Maybe he was right. "Thanks, Ducky. That really… helps."

He smiled respectfully. "Anything I can do, Timothy. Just returning the favor." He stood up. "Are you ready?" he asked.

McGee nodded and stood as well. They rode the elevator to the fourth floor. The sign hanging from the ceiling read "Long Term Care". McGee looked around and into the rooms as he passed. It was nothing like the Intensive Care Unit he was in not too long ago. There were pictures on the walls; mostly of exotic scenes and open skies. No beeping machines, no doctors running from room to room. The nurses' station was decorated with flowers and bright colored streamers on the front of the large desk.

The nurse sitting behind the desk stood up when they came into her line of sight. "Hello, Doctor Mallard."

"Regina, dear, you must call me Ducky." He reached over the desk and she placed her hand in his.

She smiled, bashfully as he held tenderly to her hand. "Who's the cutie?" she asked, looking at McGee.

"This is Timothy. A dear friend of mine who wished to meet Daniel."

Regina reached her hand out to him and gave him a firm grip. He shook back. "That is very sweet of you, Timothy." Ducky meandered away purposefully, with a suspicious look on his face.

He grinned. "Call me Tim."

"Tim. I'm glad the Doctor finally got somebody to come here with him. He's such a sweet man." She leaned in closer and said softly, "I think Daniel's condition is really getting to him. He's been here almost every day for the past month. Even when Daniel's asleep, he comes out here and tells us stories for hours."

"Yep, that sounds like Ducky." McGee smirked. "How is Daniel doing, by the way?"

Her face grew grim. "Not very well, unfortunately. His condition is deteriorating drastically. I don't think he has much longer."

McGee nodded eyes down, and then looked over at Ducky, who was studying a rather beautiful picture of what looked like Hawaii. "I just hope it doesn't affect him too badly."

Regina gave him a smile. "Daniel should be awake by now," she called out to Ducky.

He nodded, "This way, Timothy," he said, leading him down the hall.

Daniel wasn't awake yet, which was a good thing. McGee was so surprised by the way he looked, that he stopped short. He was bald, not even eyelashes were preset. His eyes were sunken in can surrounded by dark circles. He was unbelievably thin, there was absolutely no fat anywhere that he could see. Daniel looked almost—Tim didn't really know how to describe it—uninhabited? At least he appeared to be resting peacefully.

Ducky went over to Daniel and placed a hand on his forearm. The man stirred slowly and looked up at Ducky. "My friend." He exclaimed in a raspy voice, with a British accent. "It's so good to see a familiar face in the morning."

Ducky sat his bed up. "Good to see you too, as always." He turned to McGee. "This is the young man I was telling you about. Timothy McGee."

McGee stepped up and took Daniel's thin hand in his own. "Ducky's told me so much about you."

"Likewise. I've been told you can see the other side."

McGee's mouth opened slightly, but nothing came out. Daniel gave a smile of understanding. "Never thought of it that way?"

One side of McGee's mouth quirked up. "Apparently, I've never thought of it in a few ways."

Daniel nodded. "Have a seat." He pointed toward a chair behind McGee. Ducky had already sat down on the other side. Daniel readjusted himself against the pillows. "So," he said. "This is recent, what you can see?"

"Yes. Almost a month ago, I was shot and nearly died—"

"Do you remember anything from that?"

"You mean did I see a 'light' or something?"

Daniel smiled coyly. "Forgive my curiosity. I am nearing that same destination."

"Right. No I don't remember anything. Other than the premonition."

"Ah, yes. You saw the future. I must admit, I've never heard of that before."

"You haven't?" McGee said timidly.

Ducky said, from the other side of Daniel, "I told you he knew a lot, but I didn't say he was that good."

"So what was the premonition about?"

McGee cracked his neck, preparing to tell the story again. He had, after all, known this was coming. "My partner, Tony and I were chasing a suspect. I felt really scared. It was like—I knew something was wrong. We finally cornered him and we almost talked him down, but then something… happened and he wound up shooting Tony." He cleared his throat. "There was nothing I could do. All I remember after that is waking up in the hospital."

"Interesting," Daniel said. "Not to make a spectacle out of your pain, of course." He smiled at McGee. "In my experience, a 'near miss' with death can sometimes give one the gift you have received. It is very rare, of course. What else?"

It took McGee a little longer to tell him about Dianne. There was just so much to say and Daniel was extremely interested in what he saw. His eyes never left Tim's face as he talked. By the time he reached the part about the blinding light there were unshed tears in his eyes. McGee could think of nothing to say to comfort him, so he just went with, "It was beautiful."

Daniel smiled at him. "That sounds lovely." He seemed thoughtful for a moment. "Would you mind trying something for me?"

"Like what?"

"I once had a friend with the same ability as you. I'm sure Ducky's mentioned. He could do something that I believe you have yet to discover. As have many others that I have found. If you would take my hand."

Curious, McGee did what he was asked.

"Now, focus. Close your eyes."

McGee did. "What am I trying to do?"

"I want to know what you feel. Sometimes people like you can create a connection to others, if the spirits so chose, that is. Very rarely, they can connect to the spirit of a living person as well." McGee adjusted his position in his chair. "Just relax."

Tim took a deep breath, reigning in his mind. He focused on Daniel's hand; the way it felt. Brittle, dry, almost papery. And cold. It was somewhat unnerving. It felt so lifeless. McGee couldn't stop thinking about how close to death Daniel really was. He was so… so…. Suddenly, McGee felt something. It seemed like it was emanating from Daniel's hand; like vibrating warmth. It began making its way up his arm. He wanted to let go, but all he could do was squeeze Daniel's hand tighter. It was as if he were being cut off from the physical world. He couldn't hear anything from around him, and he couldn't open his eyes. It was an odd occurrence, as if the further up his arm the feeling went, the more the trapped feeling started to fade away, and was replaced by a calmness that seemed to envelope him. It was ethereal.

He could sense the spirits in the room all around him. They said nothing, but he could feel their eagerness, directed at Daniel. They almost gave an impression of impatience, and it felt as if they were pleading with him to understand that they meant no harm. They were all just waiting for Daniel to come home.

As quickly as it began, the experience ended. McGee sat back quickly in his chair, shaking and drenched in sweat. Ducky was standing at his side, holding onto Tim's shoulder, and clearly had been for a while. Tim breathed deeply, trying to calm his pounding heart. "Are you alright, Timothy?" Ducky asked.

Daniel was rubbing his hand and looking at him excitedly. McGee scrubbed at his forehead; a dull ache was forming behind his eyes. He gazed up at Daniel. "You—you wouldn't believe—" He couldn't really decide on how to explain what he had felt.

Ducky sat down on the bed and regarded at him with a renewed interest.

Daniel asked, "What did you see?"

"I didn't see anything, but I could sense them."

"Who?"

"I don't know. But they're waiting for you." Daniel gave a stunned expression. "They really want to see you. I could tell how much they loved you."

Daniel swallowed, dryly. Quietly, he asked, "Do you know when?"

McGee took a deep breath. "Soon. Very soon."

Ducky wiped the unshed tears from his eyes and placed his hand on Daniel's. Daniel was looking rather overwhelmed, despite his interest before. "I think we've had enough for a while, my friend." He stood up, drawing McGee with him. He lowered the bad back down. "You rest for a while and I'll be back in a few hours."

"Wait." Daniel raised himself up with what little strength he had left. He focused on McGee. "You must come back when I pass."

Ducky began to protest, but McGee spoke over him. He was intrigued by what he had witnessed. "I'll come."

Daniel gave him a tired smile, and then relaxed back into his pillows. He was asleep by the time they withdrew the room.

Ducky turned to him out in the parking lot. "You don't have to come, you know."

McGee sighed. "You do realize you don't have to do this on your own, Ducky. If you won't tell anybody else, then at least let me be there to help you."

Ducky glanced up at the hospital building, right around where Daniel's room would be. "I just feel like I would be making it about me if I did that. And that's not what I want."

Tim put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Ducky, losing a friend is not something to be taken lightly. It's okay to lean on the people who care about you."

Ducky smiled. "That is the one aspect I have never been good at."

"We love you, you know that?"

"Yes, I do. Thank you, Timothy."

AN: I apologize that the chapters are coming less often, but I have been working on chapter eleven all day. I really have been trying hard to work in my spare time. I do hope you enjoyed this chapter. Believe me, the action is just getting started. I always welcome suggestions, although, a as of right now, only the little ones can be added. Say a little cute scene b/t some of the characters, or something like that. Criticism - constructive, if you please - helps as well. It's okay, you won't hurt my feelings.

I will try to update soon. Have a good time, wherever you may be. Live the life!