Fucking joints

John Winchester won't be getting any father of the year awards. He won't be getting any father of the month awards. At his very best, he would probably not get any father of the last five minutes awards.

He took his eldest shooting when he was seven. He gave his youngest a gun when he was nine. He taught them how to steal and lie and hustle and how to drive away from the cops. He taught his sons to fight and shoot and kill.

He won't be getting any father of the year awards.

But John Winchester has rules. His rules are law. They make him feel like a parent.

The first and last words out of their mouths are "sir". They wake up at reveille, they eat and they run 10 k and work out before school. Every morning, every day, weekdays and weekends, sun, rain or snow. Hunters have to be ready.

They don't say "fuck". Sam can talk about their "goddammed" life and Dean can call everyone he meets a "son of a bitch", but they don't get to say "fuck". They say "frigging" and "freaking" and sometimes they go all the way to "f" and "u" and then they bite the rest because they remember all too well the day Dean spat a tooth because he said the whole word. John is not even sure why he cares about that one in particular and not any of the others, but the law was laid and has to be obeyed.

They don't do drugs. He fed hard liquor to them both before they were twelve to stitch up wounds he was to incompetent to protect them from. They drink beer since way before either of their fifteen's birthday and John can't make himself care. But they don't do drugs.

John knows he's not getting any father of the year awards. But he feels like a parent.

Then he gets home unexpectedly at 7 AM one day and sneaks inside to see if they are working out properly and sees them spread out in the couch looking like they haven't slept all night.

"Just give me the fucking joint, Dean", Sam mumbles slowly. "Roll your fucking own", Dean answers in the same lazy tone.

7 AM and they are smoking a fucking joint.

John turns around, heads for the bar.

Not getting any awards, really.