Chapter 19
A Favor for a Friend
Shepard sat perfectly still on her couch as she read over the data-pad she was holding in her right hand all the while letting Jack tattoo her left wrist. If it weren't for the days she used to spend meditating with Samara back during the Suicide Mission, the redhead doubted she would be able to remain as still as a statue like she was currently.
The Justicar had taught her a lot during their talks in the Starboard Observation lounge. She had openly talked about the Justicar Order, teaching the younger human about their code and what it took to become one. But it was through their shared time that she had learned the basics of meditation.
Learning meditation from her friend had originally been nothing more than a bonding experience between them. Later on, however, the lessons the wise Asari had taught her were used to calm her down from certain panic during some of the more extreme moments in her recent years.
Moments like facing down the Human Reaper, dodging a Reaper beam and Reaper forces as she tried to summon Kalros and facing down a Reaper on foot on Rannoch were a few of those moments where nerves of steel weren't enough to keep her calm.
Before the Reapers, the biggest thing a solider could plan to encounter was a thresher maw or some other sort of wildlife like it. In those occasions soldiers usually had a tank or some other sort of vehicle with a large gun on at the ready to take them on, and those who tried on foot usually didn't survive. Thinking back, the N7 couldn't recall the amount of thresher maws she had faced in the Mako during her hunt for Saren.
Regardless of the jokes her crew made about the vehicle, they could all agree facing a thresher maw with a giant cannon was better than facing it on foot any day of the year.
Once the Reapers showed up in the commander's life all the way back on her hunt for Saren, the things she had to face seemed to get larger in size or in amount, and sometimes it was both. The first time she had faced a thresher maw on foot was for Grunt's Rite of Passage, and from there the next big thing was the human Reaper embryo.
Facing something that completely dwarfed them in size was frightening; the mechanical noises it made rang in her ears for weeks after the fight. Part of the redhead had nearly panicked at the sight of the huge machine. But thanks to the breathing exercises Samara taught her she managed to calm herself down and fight it with her crew.
The same went for all the other insane moments she went through. Shepard had managed to stay focused and calm when facing down the Reaper on Rannoch because of those same breathing exercises. One deep breath had managed to steel her nerves, and as she ran around dodging the death beam, continuing to breathe calmly had kept her from letting panic take her over.
That and knowing if she tried to run for it the Reaper would still keep control of the Geth, kill the Quarian's and kill her as she ran. She was in a situation where she couldn't back out, and that was a major factor keeping her from losing her cool.
With the end of the war it seemed to the N7 that using the skill for keeping herself calm against giant monsters wasn't going to be needed anymore. Now she was simply using her ability to sit still for hours at a time to allow Jack to give her a tattoo and read over the message she received from Kolyat Krios.
Commander,
I wanted to thank you again for holding the ceremony for my father before you left to defeat Cerberus and the Reapers. My father…he believed that you would succeed in your mission. The Reapers seemed impossible to defeat, but he told me that if there was anyone who could do what seemed impossible, it was you. I'm glad to see he was right and that you survived the fight. My father was at peace with everything he had done, but he did have one final wish for you and asked me to give his message to you after the war was over.
Shepard clenched the data-pad a little tighter knowing the next lines of the message were going to be directly from Thane. Losing him to Kai Leng still hurt, and although she had killed the sword wielding operative, a more sadistic side of her wished to have let him linger a little longer. He had caused her and the rest of the galaxy so much trouble and pain.
The death she gave him was too swift.
On the other hand, Shepard knew Thane wouldn't have wanted her to do anything more than she had. He had been trained to grant death quickly and painlessly. To have tortured Kai Leng in Thane's name would have tainted the spirit of her fallen friend after he had worked so hard to find peace.
Her kill had been quick, probably not painless, but using her omni-blade to kill him was poetic justice. He had stabbed Thane with his blade causing him to die; she broke that blade and gutted him with her own.
"You okay, Shepard?" Jack asked, noticing the tightening of her muscles.
Quickly she relaxed her body, fighting against the sadness building up in her body. "Yeah." She continued reading despite the tattooed biotic giving her a look that told the N7 she was aware of her lie.
Shepard, if you are reading this than both you and Kolyat survived the war against the Reapers. You have truly performed the impossible. It is possible that at the time you are reading this that I have departed to the sea, but I must ask you again not to mourn for me. Your heart has been burdened by much since this war began; please do not let me be a burden after it is over.
I am at peace Shepard.
The N7 blinked away the tears that were trying to form. She could hear his voice as she read the words and knew he was finally at peace.
You were the first friend I had made in many years; maybe one of the first true friends I had ever made. As I write this I begin to realize I never thanked you for believing that I was worthy of more than the cold isolation I resigned myself to. For the first time in years I had others to depend on, people who showed me the meaning of true friendship, and it is you I have to thank for that. I may not get the chance to express my gratitude next time we speak, so allow me to do it now.
Thank you for everything, Shepard. Much of the peace I find comforting now was achieved aboard the Normandy during our mission. When I depart to the sea, know it is because of your friendship and what you did for me that I will not go as a burdened soul.
Shepard felt her heart begin to ache.
I do not believe I will live to see the end of the war, but I know you will. You were the warrior-angel the galaxy was in dire need of, and I know the Goddess Arashu will have protected you so you could succeed in your destiny. These words may be my very last, and if they are I feel I must ask one more favor of you. What I ask will be difficult, but all things worth doing are.
Find peace Shepard. You have earned your rest from conflict.
One day I will meet you and our friends across the sea, but not yet.
Live well.
Thane.
"Thank you, Thane. We'll meet you there someday," Shepard whispered.
Jack was sitting close enough to her that her whisper was still audible. She lowered the tattoo gun and looked to the N7. "He left a message behind?" she asked.
Shepard nodded. "Kolyat sent it to me. He wrote it before Cerberus attacked the Citadel and asked Kolyat to give it to me after we succeeded in defeating the Reapers."
"What did he say?"
"A lot, but he asked me to find peace. Told me it was my time to rest from conflict just as it was his when we last spoke before the attack," the redhead explained.
Her friend nodded and began tattooing again. "It's a good plan. And he's right about the resting part, mostly. You're going to be stuck with political bullshit while you're here and that's more of a pain in the ass than a regular fight."
The N7 chuckled softly, not wanting to cause her body to move while Jack had the tattoo gun to her skin. "You have a point," Shepard said.
She looked back down to the data-pad to finish up the remainder of Kolyat's message.
Thank you for everything you've done, Commander. I would also like you to know that the Salarian Councilor has been very generous in helping fund the scientists researching the cure for Kepral Syndrome. With the Relays and comms down on a galactic level it has become difficult, but there are still scientists in the Sol System working on it. It will be difficult even after the Relays are up, but all things worth doing are.
That's what my father taught me.
Thank you again,
Kolyat Krios.
Shepard closed the data-pad and set it down next to her. It was a surprise to find a message from Kolyat in her message box this afternoon, yet it wasn't an unwelcome one. She had wondered if he had survived the Citadel occupation. But with her recovery and then the Saracino incident following right after it the N7 found herself constantly busy in some form or another.
Now, though, she was getting back into the swing of checking her extranet messages daily to keep up with reports coming in from Hackett and the Council as well as personal messages such as the one Kolyat sent her. Hearing from the son of her late friend was great, hearing that scientists were still working on finding a cure for Kepral Syndrome was in some ways even better.
Thane had been stricken with the disease for some time before his end and because of it no amount of blood given to him from Kolyat made a difference. The wound Kai Leng had dealt might have been survivable had the disease not been so far along, and at the time of his death that simple knowledge made the commander feel worse.
She could remember the service they held for Thane and finding out from his son that there were scientists working on trying to find a cure but were in need of funding. At that point Shepard found herself ready to threaten the Salarian Councilor into giving funding to whoever the scientists working on finding a cure were.
Her plan wasn't one that she believed would work even if she threatened to tell the other Council members about the experiments she saw on Sur'Kesh. There was always a possibility the rest of the Council knew…and threatening the Councilor after having a memorial service for Thane felt wrong.
Thane wouldn't want a cure gained by threats, Shepard thought as Jack began coloring in the tattoo. Even though he was an assassin, he was a very peaceful person with deep religious beliefs. If Mordin can cure the Genophage without threats or costing thousands of lives then we can cure Kepral Syndrome doing the same. I don't know if I can do anything to help create the cure, but I will have to make sure Kolyat knows he can ask me for any help needed.
"Jack. Do you know what kind of state the combat arena is in?" Shepard asked.
"Last I heard they were running tests on it to make sure it was still safe. Some sorry sucker was going to have to go in with no guarantee it would be a simulation like you, me and Grunt did after you broke the scoreboard." There was smirk on the biotic's face undoubtedly caused by the memory of the hard fight as the simulator malfunctioned with them inside of it. "Why? What are you thinking about doing?"
The tattooed biotic stopped tattooing and looked to the N7. When she saw the thoughtful look on the commander's face her smirk became a broad smile, "You can't sign up for testing it, Girl Scout. I heard they were going to do it later tonight."
A frown creased her lips. Damn. I'll have to wait until they're done testing then. "And here I was thinking I could drag you and Miranda into testing it with me. It would be like a date for you two."
Jack rolled her eyes then moved back in to finish up the tattoo. "Not like you have a set of armor right now anyways."
"I could always ask for a new set…and you didn't deny it being a date."
"No point. You'll keep saying it's a date anyways."
"True," Shepard agreed, smiling as she did.
Once again Jack rolled her eyes. "Why do you want to go hit up the combat arena? Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't mind letting loose a little. But I know you have some reasoning for it."
The tattooed biotic was right; there was a reason she wanted to go to the combat arena. With all the repairs going on and credits needed for those repairs, the redhead had to doubt that the funding the scientists searching for a cure were getting no longer came close to the same funding they had been receiving before.
Back before the final push the commander had received a lot of fan mail from people who watched the matches that took place inside the arena, each asking for different things from footage to charity. The former of the two had been an easy courtesy to give, but the latter was something she had enjoyed doing.
Helping others was just something the N7 found satisfying. Using her innate ability to kick ass to help a charity for kids or something of that sort made it all the more pleasing. As of late she had a lack of fan mail but that was due to being on the road of recovery as well as the arena needing repairs.
It's not so bad. At least I don't have anyone confessing their love or telling me Kasumi isn't "right" for me. Shepard wasn't sure how she would react when or if she ever received messages telling her to leave Kasumi because of whatever reason the person came up with. The most obvious response she could think of was to simply ignore the messages just as she did before.
Of course some would be upset that she didn't reciprocate their love, or what they believed was love, but they would eventually move on. They'll find real love someday. I'm just not the one it will be with.
Her heart belonged to a certain thief and that was that.
Weird fan mail aside, she planned to enter the arena again but this time it would be to help get funding or bring more attention to the research for a Kepral Syndrome cure. It was the least she could do for now. I'll have to ask Kolyat for the name of the project and the group working on it.
"My plan is to bring more awareness to Kepral Syndrome and the scientists researching for a cure. It would also be nice if it brought in more funding while people are feeling generous," Shepard answered the biotic.
Jack nodded. "Sounds good to me. I'll talk to the cheerleader and see when we can get a match set up. Thane went out kicking ass, I think it would be fair for us to kick the ass of that shitty disease he had until it's out of this galaxy." Shepard couldn't have put it better herself. The biotic turned off the tattoo gun. "All right, Girl Scout. We're done."
Shepard looked down at her wrist and grinned as the tattooed biotic stood up. "I love it." She stood up and pulled the biotic into a one armed hug using her right arm. "Thank you, Jack."
Her friend gave her a small pat on the back then moved away. "Yeah yeah, you're welcome. No need to get all mushy on me."
Shepard couldn't stop her smile from broadening at her friend calling a one armed hug "getting mushy" on her. I'd make a joke about her not minding if it was Miranda, but I don't think she'll take the bait.
"Are you going to go see what your kids are up to?" Jack gave a nod. "All right. I guess I'll start working on the reports I have to send to Hackett." Shepard wasn't looking forward to doing any sort of paperwork in what had recently been her down time, but it was best to get a start on it now before it became a larger pile than it was.
There were still official reports to file on attacking the interior of the Illusive Man's base, the final push and then what she had experienced after Anderson lost consciousness. Most of it was going to end up confidential information and some of it she had already told to Hackett and Anderson.
When she handed the official report to Hackett, the redhead had a feeling the old Admiral was going to hand it right back to her just as he did for the Alpha Relay incident. There were some things that the galaxy was better off not knowing about, such as the choice she was faced with.
Besides for those reports, she had to finish filling out her report on everything that had happened with Saracino. Ghost, Allers and Bailey had each done their own reports of course so most, if not all, of the information she would put into her own report would already be known, but there were some traditions the Alliance kept even in this state the galaxy was in.
Paperwork was one of those traditions that never left.
Jack smirked humorously at her. "Have fun."
"Oh yeah, I'm going to have a party," Shepard replied, smiling as she sat back down and leaned towards the table full of data-pads. Her smile became full-blown evil as she grabbed a new data-pad. "You know, I could always use a secretary."
Jack raised her hands in front of her as she took a step back. "Oh hell no. I have to fill out enough duty rosters without you adding more paperwork."
"Come on. Please." When Jack shook her head and took another step back Shepard twisted her lips into a mock pout. "Fine. I'm sure you have a date to bring Miranda on anyways. I can't step between you and true love."
"Shut up, Shepard," Jack said with a roll of her eyes.
"No denial. It's okay if you two are an item Jack. This is a judgment free zone." The biotic again shook her head and gave her a small warning glare. "All right, I'll stop. If you see Prangley, remind him to stop pushing himself so hard. Everyone needs to take a break."
Whether it was lifting rubble with his biotic's or other activities, the boy had been doing everything he could to help. When Kasumi and Shepard arrived to help Jack the day before, the trio had found him nearly zapped of energy. He hadn't taken a break in days and he was using stims to stay awake under his teacher's noses.
Needless to say, when Jack found out she had gone off on him. She was angry in a very protective way that only she could be when shouting and letting a few curses escape her. His heart was in the right place, but his body and biotic's needed rest. Everyone had limits, and as a teenager who had nowhere near as much training as Jack and Shepard, his limits were going to be significantly lower than theirs.
I can't deny that I am surprised at how long he managed to go without a break. Even if he isn't as powerful as Jack or myself, he still has a lot of potential. At least he and the other kids won't be thrown into a terrible war again.
Jack scowled at the reminder of Prangley pushing himself too far without her knowledge. "Oh believe me. Prangley hasn't heard the end of it yet."
"He needs to be able to walk straight, Jack. Try not to verbally tear him a new one."
"I'll just sick Rodriguez on him. She can nag worse than the cheerleader," Jack said with a sadistic smile. "I should go make sure those squirts aren't getting into too much trouble. Later, Shepard."
"See you later Jack." Shepard gave a small wave. As Jack began to leave the commander spoke up again. "I forgot to ask you earlier, but who is the unlucky sucker testing out the combat arena?"
The tattooed biotic shrugged. "Didn't catch a name, but after the shit we went through I hope they brought extra medi-gel."
Shepard nodded absently, giving another goodbye as she focused on beginning to file the report on assaulting the Illusive Mans base. She's right. Whoever it is will need extra medi-gel if it is as bad as it was when we had to do it.
She felt bad for whoever it was, but she held hope the arena would hire or ask someone with a lot of combat skill to avoid any unneeded deaths.
I'm sure they will be fine, Shepard thought before beginning to get to work.
"Ghost is one crazy bastard," Miranda noted. Kasumi couldn't agree more as the duo began their walk back to Shepard's apartment. It was getting near midnight Earth time but the two women had found themselves busy the last few hours trying to help the combat arena techs fix their arena.
When they finally got it close enough where they were almost certain someone inside wouldn't be killed, Ghost, Gallick and Kar offered their services to be the ones to fight off the simulations while they ensured everything was working.
Unfortunately the reprogramming had gone exactly as it had when Shepard, Jack and Grunt did it, which was pretty much poorly. The N7 Talons were stuck inside of the simulation for near on ten minutes fighting against Cerberus, Reapers, Collectors and Geth on different occasions and then sometimes at the same time.
To their credit, the Talons didn't appear to be all that bothered by it. In fact Kasumi would have to say they looked like they were having a good time. If it wasn't for the fact Kar and Grunt have different voices, I would have assumed it was our little berserkopath in there laughing manically.
Kar had destroyed every simulated enemy he ran into with his Striker Assault Rifle or by head-butting his way through them. Every enemy had a ticket punched for the pain train and Kar was their conductor who made sure they reached destination broken and defeated right on time.
Gallick was completely focused on the fight yet somehow managed to look anything but. He managed to always stay one step ahead of the simulations even if he didn't appear to be planning anything. At one point Kasumi had spied him sitting on the ground trying to light a cigarette in the middle of one of the fights against an Atlas that was right on the other side of the cover he was sitting behind.
For those watching it looked like he had a death wish. But when it stepped closer to the cover, the Batarian tossed a set of grenades over the barricade promptly tearing apart one of the Atlas's legs. He then grabbed his N7 Piranha, stood up and unloaded the entire thermal clip into the simulated pilot.
Ghost was quick to call him a show off as he laughed hysterically at how casual Gallick was being. The Batarian merely shrugged then blew a perfect smoke O-ring.
Kasumi decided he was a badass and used the simulation announcer's voice to congratulate the Batarian on a nice kill then reprimand the other two for slacking.
Things continued like that for the Krogan and Batarian for the rest of the match as the trio worked together to keep the simulator running as the engineers tried fixing it. What made Ghost a crazy bastard, in the words of Miranda, was how he ended their fight.
The man had switched between his Executioner Pistol, Black Widow and M-11 Suppressor off and on throughout the fight, using them in conjunction with an enforcement gauntlet, a cloak and a set of tech attacks. For the most part he hadn't done anything too crazy during the fight; he mostly fought smart as he watched the battlefield carefully, yelling out orders when they were needed.
At the end of the fight the N7 Talons had been facing three Scions, four Geth Juggernauts, one Cerberus Atlas and a Banshee. Before that they had a few husks, abominations and Phantoms, but the trio made quick work of them, leaving the harder hitting opponents for last.
Gallick had quickly stopped taking his time and smoking as he and Kar both became extremely serious. Ghost had already become serious when the Banshee showed up, but as soon as the other large enemies showed up he appeared to be in a mindset for fighting a war. In a way it had a war for the squad, taking much of their spare ammunition and all of Gallick's missile launcher ammunition to take out the three scions and Banshee.
Had they been lucky, they could have taken out most of them with one shot, but that Banshee had really screwed up Gallick's shot. The trio had been chased around by the Banshee, leaving them to run and shoot to escape. When the Banshee wasn't chasing them they were dodging the gunfire from the Atlas, Juggernauts and Scions.
FUBAR didn't quite cut it when it came to describing their situation.
The situation made it incredibly difficult for the Batarian to line up his shot without his shields being taken down with ease, but eventually he managed to line up his targets. After they had taken down the Scions and Banshee there was an audible sigh of relief from all three of the warriors heard over the remaining gunfire.
They hadn't had to work so hard on any of the previous fights in the simulator and the thief had a feeling the screams of the Banshee brought back bad memories of the war. Neither of them faltered though, they regrouped counted their remaining thermal clips and came to a realization.
"All we have left are a few rounds each? Damn it, why couldn't they just keep guns how they were in the old days before thermal clips? I never faced a crisis of reloading or no rounds left back then," Ghost had groaned in agitation.
"You forget to reload?" Gallick had questioned humorously.
"When the switch first happened. I can't count how many times I thought I had fired five shots instead of six."
"Ha! You never got to witness Pyjak's impotent rage Gallick?"
"My impotent rage?" Ghost had sounded offended but Gallick and Kar were chuckling to themselves.
"Tell you what Kar. We get out of this alive and I'll buy you some ryncol then you can tell me all about it."
"You've got yourself a deal Gallick."
Kasumi found herself giggling as Ghost was stuck between being offended and wanting to defend himself. Instead of doing either he used his cloak, disappearing from sight and leaving his two teammates to scan the area for where he would reappear.
When he reappeared he was in front of the Atlas mech dodging under its swinging arm by scrambling down low on his hands and toes. After the initial dodge he again had to dodge away when it attempted to grab him but his dodge gave him an opening to continue his crazy idea.
He then grabbed onto the arm, causing the pilot to try to get him off by swinging the arm around and attempting to squash him with the other. It would have been a laughable sight if it weren't for the fact the situation could leave the man dead if he failed to dodge.
Ghost was hanging on tightly to the Atlas mech as Gallick and Kar began opening fire on it to try to get its attention, buy their leader time and crack the canopy before they ran out of thermal clips. The purple eyed N7 managed to get on his feet and then jump to the glass canopy to which he smashed through using his enforcement gauntlet.
He broke through with ease, leaving the N7 to keep the pilot in a chokehold with one arm as he used the other to aim the main gun of the mech on the Juggernauts. Once he was finished he placed a Cain Mine on the pilot, saluted him, jumped out then detonated the mine, destroying the Atlas mech and pilot completely.
"Who's impotent rage now?"
"I think you were trying to overcompensate," Kar had replied without blinking while wearing a large grin.
Ghost shook his head and the simulation ended. They had managed to finally fix it all, allowing the trio to step out unharmed despite the purple eyed N7 thinking it would be a good idea to climb an Atlas mech.
With everything fixed, the engineers were going to open the arena back up to everyone tomorrow. Ghost planned to do a few rounds when they did for charity and fun. Kasumi had a similar plan, though hers was more of taking Shepard there on a date then charity. Although if Shep has any charities she can dedicate it to, I won't be against it.
"Ghost likes to pull crazy stunts like that sometimes," Kasumi told the former Cerberus operative. "I'm more surprised Shep hasn't done anything like that yet. I would have thought by now she would add 'jumping on an Atlas while it's piloted' onto her list of crazy things done." She pursed her lips in thought. "Then again you can't really top facing down a Reaper on foot with nothing but a targeting laser. Not even Ghost can top that."
Miranda gave a tired laugh as they entered the elevator leading to their commander's apartment. "I don't think anyone can top that."
"Well, not unless someone like Cerberus decides 'hey, lets revive a Reaper and try to control it, it will grant us unbelievable power.' And then Shep goes out with a targeting laser to blow it to kingdom come, again," Kasumi said in a light-hearted manor.
"I don't think Shepard plans on fighting anything as large as a Reaper with just a targeting laser ever again."
"She better not or she'll be in deep trouble when I find out." Kasumi crossed her arms over her chest as she mocked a serious face under her hood. The doors to the elevator opened, allowing the two women to exit and head into the apartment. "I wonder if anyone is up."
The raven haired woman chuckled lightly. "Or just Shepard," she teased.
Oh, it's going to be like that, huh? "No. I was wondering if Jack was too, for your sake that is. You two would make a cute couple if you got past this whole 'sexual tension' stage." She supplied finger quotes for her mention of sexual tension.
If Miranda had the energy she would have glared, but instead it came off as tired exasperation. "Not tonight, Kasumi."
"Oh fine. Party pooper," she pouted. Truth be told, the thief herself was extremely tired and wanted nothing more than to cuddle up in bed with her lover. She hadn't expended a lot of energy; her internal clock was merely reminding her that everyone needed to sleep at some point.
They entered the apartment to find it mostly dark save for the artificial fire place providing a little light. It illuminated the one person in the room who was also nose deep in a data-pad by the look of it.
"Leave it to Shepard to be working this late," Miranda mused. She looked to the thief. "I trust you two will be fine without my company?"
Before she could answer, the raven-haired woman offered a tired goodnight and left to go to her room. Kasumi made her way over to her lover but when she reached her she couldn't help but smile.
Out like a light.
She crouched down next to the sleeping woman who still had a data-pad in hand with a large set sitting on the table nearby. Must've been some really great material she was reading to leave her like this. The thief slid the data-pad from her hand and put it on the table without reading the contents. It was not her business and she was too tired to read it even if it was.
Kasumi reached her hand up, brushing fingers gently across Shepard's cheek before moving the strands of her hair behind her ear. The redhead stirred at the touch. "Kasumi," she whispered quietly.
"How'd you know?" Kasumi asked playfully while continuing to caress her cheek.
"It's…it's in how you touch me. Tender…loving."
Shepard was barely managing to hold the short conversation. Her voice was remained drowsy; her eye lids struggled to stay barely creaked open. It was enough to tell Kasumi her mind was trying to pull her back into dreamland. Despite that she still managed to make the thief's cheeks begin to warm from the blush coating them. "Honey tongue," she whispered then pressed her lips gently against the redhead's forehead. "Don't go anywhere. I'll be right back."
"I'll be here."
The hooded woman smiled to herself and left the commander on the couch as she went to prepare their bed. Although she was tired it didn't take long to get up the stairs or pull the large cover and sheet back. That was really all the preparation needed other than getting undressed but Kasumi wasn't planning on walking around the apartment in her underwear while their friends still occupied it with them.
Talk about awkward.
Once she was done she made her way back down to the N7 who was once again asleep. The thief smiled lovingly at the out cold commander, she couldn't help but find her extremely cute when she was fast asleep. Only one way I'm getting her to our bed. She bent over, putting one arm behind Shepard's back and the other under her legs. She then picked her up bridal style and began the walk to the bedroom.
As she walked, the redhead nestled in her arms, laying her head on the master thief's bosom. It's different to be so role reversed where she's cuddling against me instead of the other way around. She smiled down at the redhead, but I like it a lot. She's beautiful when she's strong for me as well as when she allows me to be strong for her, even if I'm just carrying her to bed.
One of the rarest sights in the galaxy was Shepard allowing herself to be vulnerable, or carried by someone else for that matter. She was an amazingly strong woman in and out of combat.
The first time the thief had ever seen her truly vulnerable was after the Alpha Relay incident when she went to see if she wanted a friend or to be alone. She had found her in her cabin sitting on the edge of her bed holding her head in her hands as she cried silently.
Shepard was not a loud sufferer.
It didn't really matter if it was physical pain or emotional from what Kasumi had seen of her during the Suicide Mission and after. She would suffer in silence without anyone knowing all for the sake of keeping up her unbreakable Commander Shepard persona. People needed to believe she could weather any storm and not flinch even if it was raining needles.
But her silent pain was deafening when you were a witness to it. You get so used to seeing her strong that when you see her in pain you are frozen in shock, Kasumi recalled. She hadn't even known the commander was crying until she was right next to her, and that's when she found herself frozen at seeing the unbreakable Commander finally break.
Breaking out of the stasis field of shock wasn't easy, but the hooded woman had managed to do it. Instead of offering words, Kasumi sat down on the bed next to her and wrapped the woman up in a hug, holding her and rubbing her back for a few hours until Shepard had managed to put the pieces of her heart and its fortress back together.
Thinking back to that day made Kasumi wonder if that was the day the N7 had begun to fall for her…and if it was the day she too had begun to fall for the gorgeous redhead. As she held her friend at the time, the thief could remember a warmth in her chest growing. Deep down I think I was yearning to be able to hold her like that. I remember enjoying being able to be there for her…but I think I also thoroughly enjoyed holding her in my arms.
That was the first time the master thief had ever seen Shepard vulnerable. The next was during their final talk before the end of the war. She had done her best to hide it along with all the feelings and words she truly wished to say, but Kasumi had noticed the helplessness under it all.
Seeing it had in turn caused her to ask her to promise to come back. She could recall how desperate she felt for the sky blue eyed commander to promise she would come back. Looking back now after everything that transpired afterwards, it was quite frankly embarrassing how daft the thief was to her own feelings let alone Shepard's.
Of course she wanted her friend to come back in one piece, but her feelings had been deeper than that. She had just been completely oblivious to them.
In the end everything had worked out for the best and what Kasumi had found herself admiring now was an at peace vulnerability that was pleasant instead of the painful versions of the past. I've seen it a few times as I've touched and kissed my way up and down her body. Usually at that point in time her eyes are also full of lust, which makes her even sexier.
Thinking of the look in her lover's eyes of pure longing and desire mixed together sent pleasurable shivers down her spine. Warmth began to make its way to her cheeks as it did when she would see those feelings in her eyes.
The warmth was accompanied by a new line of thought for the thief. I should pin her against the wall and kiss her tomorrow, see what kind of response I get out of her. She did it to me once and I shamelessly admit that I almost swooned. I still remember how badly I was blushing and the warmth spreading across my entire body as her perfect sky blue eyes stared into mine. Her smile was cheeky at seeing how I was affected, but it was amazing as well.
The hooded woman looked down to the woman in her arms. She was still resting peacefully against her chest and had the smallest blissful smile on her face. But that's tomorrow. Right now I'll take pleasure in holding her through the night.
She kissed her lover on the nose as she brought her into their room then laid the commander down gently on their bed in a seated position. "Come on, Ana. Let's get your top off," Kasumi whispered as she moved the black wifebeater up her stomach. The N7 complied, gripping the shirt and taking it off with Kasumi's help. They then moved to her shorts and it was then the thief noticing something new on her lover's left wrist.
At first she thought she was seeing things, but then she saw the flash of color again. Did she get a new tattoo? Curiosity filled her, but she stopped herself from checking right away.
Before she investigated, she folded Shepard's clothes and put them on the nightstand then undressed herself so they were both in their underwear. Once done she sat down on the edge of the bed where the now curled up N7 was lying near.
Her sky blue eyes were opened, barely, and when the thief took her left arm into her hands she let out a contented sigh, closing her eyes as she did. Kasumi found the new tattoo on her left wrist and couldn't help but gasp her lover's name. "Ana."
There was a sort of victorious smile on Shepard's face, but she offered no explanation, instead leaving her lover to examine the tattoo again. On her wrist, directly below the palm of her hand, was a red rose and stem laid horizontally across it; the flower petals on the right side and the stem leading off towards the left.
On one of the top petals was Kasumi and on one of the bottom was Goto. Across the stem leading towards the flower were the words I'm yours, forever. It was colored in as normal red rose was while the words were in black cursive writing. For such a simple looking tattoo Kasumi couldn't help but find it breath taking.
She was displaying her love for the thief with pride, like a badge of honor but it was Kasumi who felt honored by this show of love.
Part of her couldn't believe Shepard had done it. Any rational thought about tattooing names she had had always ran along the lines of not to do it. It was impossible to know if you would really be with the person you tattooed forever, and most people who did it ended up regretting it later on.
Despite all that, there was an understanding the hooded woman felt reading the words. Although neither planned to leave one another, Shepard was making it known that even if they ever did separate, whether through death or some other way, her heart would always belong to Kasumi.
Just as my heart will always belong to her. Kasumi placed her lips against the palm of her lover's hand and kissed it tenderly. She always finds a way to fill me with a love I can scarcely describe. My heart beats stronger because of her, and now it's beating faster thanks to her. The thief brought the palm of the N7's hand to her chest, laying it on top of her heart. Shepard smiled contently as the pulse reached her hand. "Can you feel what you do to me?"
"Yes…but know you do the same to me. Every time I think of you my heart feels stronger," Shepard whispered.
Kasumi removed her hand and laid down, pulling the cover over both of them before turning over to face her lover. Her eyes were closed but her smile had not left. Under the covers her hand moved slowly up the thief's leg, across her hip to her side and then down her forearm to her hand.
They intertwined their fingers and Kasumi leaned her head forward so their foreheads were touching. The two remained there, breathing in the others scent as the thief of the pair rubbed her thumb up and down the top of her lover's hand. "Kasumi."
"Hmm."
"How do you say I love you in Japanese?" her lover asked quietly.
"They don't really use the phrase to express their love for another person that often. I never have outside of saying it in English. The Japanese as a people are still very traditional to this day and prefer not to express their love openly through words. That doesn't mean they don't fall in love or ever show their love for someone, you just won't hear a traditional Japanese person say it to someone they recently met or in public. To say it would be really improper."
Shepard furrowed her brow, keeping her eyes closed as she did. "You say they and them instead of we when referring to the Japanese. Do you not consider yourself Japanese?"
"I consider myself a person first and foremost." She kissed the commander on the lips then resumed resting their foreheads together. "By descent I am and I know both Japanese and English, but to say I'm traditional Japanese wouldn't be true."
Saying she was a traditional anything wouldn't be true. Kasumi liked a lot of different cultures but she had never been one for staying true to a single cultures practices or beliefs. Rules weren't really anything she had made a habit of following. "I enjoy some of the culture just as I enjoy some Quarian and Turian culture. I don't like the barriers cultural differences cause. I don't mind people who care about where they come from, it's important to remember your heritage, but I think it is also important not to be blinded by it. There is much we can learn from each other."
"True. So there isn't a phrase for it?"
"No, there is. I just felt like telling you how informal it would be in case you fell in love with another cute Japanese girl who followed a more traditional line of speech that way you wouldn't make things awkward. I wouldn't want you to look bad," Kasumi quipped.
"Kasumi," the N7 chided tiredly.
The thief giggled and nudged her Shep's nose with her own. "I'm teasing. I already told you Ana, I'm yours just as you are mine. There are a few ways to say you love something or someone, but the one you're looking for is used mostly in anime, songs and stories. Aishiteru wa."
"Aishiteru wa?"
Kasumi giggled softly and planted another kiss on her tired lover's lips. "It's not a question, Ana."
Shepard smiled and kissed her back. "You try pronouncing a word you've never spoken before and we'll see if you sound like you're making a question or not." After a few seconds of staring at the eyelids of her sleepy lover, the thief turned onto her back and pulled Shepard closer to her so her head was resting over her heart. "I don't think I've had the honor of using your breast as a pillow before."
"Well tonight you can." Kasumi placed a kiss on the top of her head. "I love you."
"Aishiteru wa, Kasumi."
Even if it was completely informal, the master thief didn't care. She loved hearing the words roll off her tired lover's tongue. "Eien, I'm yours," she responded quietly.
"What does that mean?" her lover asked curiously.
"I'm yours, forever." Kasumi could feel Shepard smiling as she began to let sleep take her. "Quick question Ana."
"Hmm?"
"Should I use a sharpie and write property of Anastasia Shepard on my arm?" Her lover began to laugh quietly into her chest and after sharing one last kiss both women let sleep take them.