The first hint as to what bothered Severus came to her in the middle of July. And surprisingly, Petunia got it from Lily. The sisters had not been on the best of terms for the last few years, but in the midst of her happiness, Petunia often forgot to be angry with the red-haired witch. Lily in turn, seemed to still feel guilty about her hurtful words said in the heat of the moment, and took any opportunity to try and renew the sisterly bonds that had long been missing. It was during one such conversation, innocent enough though made slightly awkward by the distance between the two girls.
Lily had been talking about James Potter, a favourite topic of hers, though the boy was always mentioned with annoyance. It was clear to Petunia that Lily was in love with the teen but would not admit it to herself. For that reason, she bore the conversation involving the Potter boy despite her hatred of the boy. She had heard in passing from her sister that the boy often bullied Severus, which displeased Petunia immensely.
Anyway, the conversation which had initially started on Potter had drifted to the tensions between students. According to Lily, some students, mostly in Slytherin which Petunia knew to be the house Severus was in, disapproved of Muggles and by extension Muggle-borns which they referred to by the insulting term 'Mudblood'. Lily, was of course, a target of such insults. Those students were mostly what Lily called Purebloods, and believed that wizards were superior to non-magical people like Petunia and their parents.
Though wizards had had diverging opinions for years, the topic was at the front of everyone's mind ever since a dark wizard calling himself Voldemort had risen to power. He was steadily gaining in influence and power, and Lily had reasons to believe there would be a war.
The more she heard about the situation, the deeper the frown on Petunia's face became. Though she had no proof, she had a feeling that Severs' worries were linked to this. In the first place, he must be in contact with those 'Purebloods'. He was, after all, in Slytherin where they seemed to be numerous. The thought worried her.
By then, she was rather sure that Severus had feelings for her. She dared not call it love for fear of seeming presumptuous, but she believed it to be quite close. She certainly loved him. But with love came insecurity and she found himself wondering how Severus felt about Muggles. Did he agree with Purebloods? Surely not. His own father was a Muggle after all. But he hated his father. And with good reasons too. Wouldn't that prompt him to regard Muggles with disdain?
She bit her lip worriedly. She did not want to believe it. But doubt had settled in. Coupled with an unhealthy fear. And yet she could not bring herself to mention it to Severus.
Life went on as if nothing had happened for a little more than a week. Severus and Petunia continued with the gardening and brewing, each keeping his worries to himself. But Petunia knew this standstill wouldn't last. She couldn't let it because it devoured her inside. With each day passing, her worries and doubts increased, until she found herself lying awake at night, turning and tossing in her bed, trying to convince herself that Severus could not hate her. Would not leave her.
Such was her worry that she slipped during a conversation with Severus and brought up Purebloods. She bit her lip immediately and tried to cover her mistake, but Severus took one long look at her and proposed softly that they go sit on the sofa so that they could talk about it.
"Did you hear about it from Lily?" asked the boy once they had settled on the couch.
The girl nodded, blue eyes fixed on her pale hands.
"It's true that I have friends who believe in Pureblood purity." started Severus. "And I won't deny I thought about it."
He took a big breath and she bit her lip.
"I can't say I like Muggles. My father wasn't exactly the best example. But I don't hate them enough to want to commit a genocide. I don't hate you. I couldn't bear to lose you and that is what would happen if I joined Voldemort."
She closed her eyes briefly, replaying his words in her mind. I don't hate you. I couldn't bear to lose you. Those were clumsy words, which didn't say the most important thing, but she cherished them all the same.
He must have misunderstood her silence because he cleared her throat, causing her to look up.
"I…Towards you I…"
She smiled in spite of her. He looked ever so uncomfortable trying to convey a feeling they had never yet put into words. It wasn't him, she knew that. But he was trying. For her.
She leaned towards him and placed her head on his shoulder, a silent acceptance of the words that had not left his lips. But she knew they floated there, ready to be said and yet unable to take form or sound. But it was enough for her to know he bore the same feelings as she did.
After a moment Severus placed an arm around her waist and pulled her in his lap, pressing his face in the crook of her neck, a rare show of tenderness. He looked almost fragile as he held her tight against him. A soft smile played on the girl's lips, as she abandoned herself to the embrace.