I finally updated all thanks to cat and RestlessMe. Cat you gave me a very brilliant idea and RestlessMe who also gave a HUGE review pointing out my mistakes. Thank you. That sure got my ass up to writing all this down. I know it's short as hell, but if this gets good reviews I'm more than happy to write tons more.

Anyone who loves Charlie slash Alan please feel free to check out RestlessMe's fic This isn't the Bathroom!

Thank you to anyone out there who bothers to read this.

Getting a Clue

"You shouldn't do that anymore, Charlie."

Berta's voice boomed inside the room momentarily stunning Charlie. Her eyes curved in amusement at the scene: hands shoved between his wide spread legs that were in clear view (thanks to the sheets that were roughly shoved off his mattress) and lay ungracefully close to the edge of the bed. His face wasn't any better with all of his hair frayed off to all sides of his bright red face gleaming in sweat; it was a quick give away to his activities.

"Damn it Berta!" Charlie gasped shamelessly not even getting up to brush himself off; it wasn't worth it anymore. "Why the hell don't you ever knock, woman! It's fucking common sense!" There wasn't as much of a bite to his voice when it came out as a breathless shriek and that made Charlie even madder that in turn consequently fuelled Bertha's amusement even more.

"I think we all know what happens up in here, Charlie." she retorted back not minding his current situation much," Which is why ,I personally, chose not to come up here because certain horny, rich bastards like you enjoy doing this all day." The mirth then altogether disappeared from her voice.

Charlie's jaw fell to the floor at the words that flowed straight out his employee's mouth. He couldn't stop the flush spreading an even darker shade of red throughout his entire face. The damn embarrassment was finally catching up to him.

"So," she went on placing her left hand on the doorframe she was currently leaning against," I think I'd appreciate it as much as Zippy," her dark onyx eyes locked with Charlie emphasising her words even more ,"if you'd at least closed the damn door."

The atmosphere in Charlie's room felt heavily weighed down with tension. That look that Bertha gave away was enough to shake Charlie's sense back a little for him to rip his hand out from underneath his shorts. The hard-on, long gone by now, made him feel even more of a dick which made his mouth run in turn.

"I just wanted to fucking scare him off, Berta, 'Sides when the hell did you start defending Alan so much?"

"You should've seen him when he ran off dropping the laundry that I had sent him to fetch from your room."

Her eyes didn't light up anymore than her voice did. It was more than obvious to Charlie she was upset, so he got defensive. In all honesty it was only fair, or at least he liked to think so.

"Damn it. All I wanted was to scare him off hoping he could get a fucking clue to finally get out of my damn house that he's been mooching off for 2 years!" Charlie sat up on his bed clenching his mattress tightly not bothering to cool down for a minute he kept on, "I want my damn peace back! Okay, I know it wasn't the greatest idea ever," He shoved his hands in front of himself in a minor secondary defence.

"You think?"

That hit a nerve.

"It was, when I thought of it, alright." he admitted in mock defeat ,"At least now he can probably start making plans to get himself and his food stuffing kid out!"

Berta could only stare at his reaction. It was certainly more than what she thought it'd be, more importantly it was obviously something bigger than what she knew Charlie would love to admit. Suddenly it was no longer her place to say anymore, so much to Charlie's surprise the red head pushed herself off the doorframe to his room, turn down towards the hall and proceeded to walk off, but not with out saying something back, of course.

"I'm taking 3 days off, Charlie."

"Well good for you!"

"Oh, and Charlie?" she shouted right back at him.

"Oh,what now?"

"I think it's you, who needs to get a damnclue!" and with that Berta made her way down the stairs, packed whatever she had brought along, and slammed the front door shut.

Charlie could only throw himself back onto his mattress in guilt.

Things were only going to get worse.

"Fuck!"

Feel free to review.

Again this for anyone who gave great advice and a special thanks to RestlessMe!