Going to need a two week hiatus for school (unless somehow I manage to write something before the break starts).
-death-in-the-orchard
They walked in orange sunlight, passing through the grassy quad as Alucard followed Integra's order to "Give [her] the grand tour." The vampire was glum, drained, rather (bizarrely) interested in sleeping through the night, as well as the next day – in fact, he wanted to hibernate for a few weeks, at least. But that wasn't going to happen. Nope. No rest for the undead.
The digital shutter effect that emerged from Integra's phone lifted the noseferatu's head, and he stared directly at the accursed piece of technology as his master filled the screen with his be-jeweled face. She snapped a second picture as the pale features contorted with abhorrence, resentment, and ever deepening exhaustion.
Alucard gritted his teeth, "Wonderful. How… wonderful of you."
"Yes, it is quite wonderful." Integra hummed contently, comparing the two pictures as she strode over the paved path, her open, olive green trench coat flowing with the fluctuating wind. It rippled briefly, before falling about her legs. Integra pushed away a lock of hair that had draped across her mouth and consequently shifted her smug grin to a slightly irritated frown. Walter walked beside her, his posture uncompromising, perfectly professional. Though he still retained his cheery air from the office.
Alucard muttered again, now glowering at any dark adolescent shape that moved in the quad. "You want me to autograph one for you?"
"Oh," Integra chuckled, aiming the phone in her vampire's direction, "no… I'd rather you autograph a certificate of authenticity."
"I doubt anyone will believe it's real. I could sign fifty, and it wouldn't make a difference."
"I'll know. Walter will know. Seras will know." Integra caught another picture, now of Alucard's luxurious hair. The black curls and waves flailing in the breeze. He glared at her while she smirked whole-heartedly. "Anyone who matters, anyone who is allowed to know who you are, will know that these pictures are real. That's good enough for me."
"Stupid, idiotic phones and their cameras, and girls with their sparkles and make-ups." The complaints rolled out without much emotion, as Alucard kept up with the longer pairs of legs by making wider, though still effortless, strides. They climbed the steps leading to the Math and Sciences building. "The target was found here." Alucard pulled on the door, finding it had already been locked. There was a snap, a movement within the lock, and the door graciously welcomed them inside. Walter shut the door as, seemingly, the lights simultaneously lit themselves for the trios' convenience.
Their footsteps filled the halls, and Integra glanced through the windows, at the pleasant courtyard that had been cast in a premature dusk. Walter asked her whether she wished to have Seras come meet them here, and Integra mulled the thought over. "Ask her where she is first."
With a nod, Walter dialed the number. They walked in silence, waiting for Seras to pick up.
It went to voicemail.
Without hesitation, the butler redialed the number and held the phone by his ear patiently, listening to the digital trills, the series of rings that continued, and continued.
"Hi, you've reached Seras! Sorry I didn't pick up! I was probably busy. I promise to call you back as soon as I can! Ummm, umm, yup – that's about it. Buh-Bye."
Voicemail again.
Alucard met Walter's frown with a sigh and a halfhearted shrug. "When I left, it looked like she was ready to take a nap." He indicated the masterpiece that had once been his face, "This took a lot out of her."
"So Seras was the one-?" Integra began doubtfully, but wasn't surprised when Alucard interrupted her.
"No. It was her girly friends. I hate them. I truly, and sincerely, loathe them."
Integra's smirk returned, "So you've been enjoying school?" The red gaze stabbed at her amusement. "Would you like to enroll for another three or so years? How about we send you off to college? You're supposedly a genius. We might as well get you a degree."
The glowing-hot glower that Integra snickered at showed all of the servant's pent of anger, accumulated bloodlust, and displayed just a taste of the horrors he'd endured.
Integra's step was relatively light as she continued in high spirits, "I'm sure the vice principal will be thrilled when we give her the good news. And how do you feel about Harvard? Or summer camp? Swimming in lakes? …You look so excited, Alucard. I'll have Walter arrange everything, just like last time."
Alucard's murmur strapped an iron ball and chain to Integra's previously nimble and cheerful soul, "She's become so desperate… to see me in a bikini. … My, my. What a predicament." He smiled at her, a fang-filled grin, as his eyes shone into her crinkled look of utter revulsion. Yes, that delectable expression – a dash of angst, drizzled with nausea – showing him he'd successfully implanted a quite glorious nightmare into her mind. Feeling a bit better than before, Alucard purred softly, "As you're clearly picturing this lovely scene, me standing on a dock, perhaps… before a setting sun (make sure to give me a glass of wine)…. Answer me this: would crimson be your color of choice? For the tight, string bikini – that someone, of course, will have to help me tie properly. It already being a size too small, we would want to prevent something from… slipping."
A dark scowl made Integra's voice bitter, "Oh yes. I'd be delighted to see it. A tight, size too small, red Malibu string bikini – on a dock, before a red sunset, with a glass of red wine…. Just as long as I get to see you drown in it."
A few feet from his mistress, Walter nodded with a quaint smile, just now putting his phone away. "That sounds quite fair."
There was a quiet pause. Several heads inferior to the butler's height, Alucard gave Walter a pointed look. And then sneered. "You'll tie - everything."
Integra sighed. All she could offer was a strongly stated, "Good luck, Walter. God be with you."
"Oh, Sir. He will be, since I'll most certainly be dead by the end of it."
*~*~::..+..::~*~*
Father Anderson had excused himself from the meeting to go to the restroom. He had left with the honest intention of using the restroom and then returning. It was utterly by means of coincidence or luck that he heard the voice of the female Vampire Alucard, as it easily carried down a corridor perpendicular to his.
Father Anderson at this point was fulfilling his duty as a teacher, to confront these trespassers dutifully; though he certainly enjoyed the idea of throwing the Hellsing heathens out, fantasizing about how he'd do it even as he stood silently, waiting for the footsteps to round the corner.
As they appeared a mere 10 feet or so out of reach, Father Anderson confirmed the identities of the voices. The Protestant woman frowned at him. The Hellsing butler showed little emotion, other than mild surprise. And the Vampire Alucard-
The monster disappeared from his master's side, and was striding towards Anderson, who debated, within the 2 seconds available, whether or not to meet the attack with his own, or merely deflect the miniature vampire.
"You—! Catholic Bastard Priest!"
Just as Father Anderson slipped his hand into his back pocket to retrieve a bundle of scriptures (bound up like a wad of cash), the Hellsing vampire stopped before making contact, and no physical bloodlust was expressed. Instead Alucard commanded the priest, with an amount of authority he clearly had no right to:
"Change my test grades."
Father Anderson stared down at the Sparkle-Fairy-Princess (previously known as the No-Life-King) and his brow furrowed as he paused. So many things were confusing him right now. The vampire's face… was more detestable than ever before. It made Anderson nauseous. And what he'd said... "What is it you want from me, Demon?" Father Anderson swallowed, wincing slightly at the acrid taste of bile.
Alucard's white little fingers counted the premises of his argument into his palm, "I want you to grade my tests, quizzes, and assignments properly. I only put down correct answers. I answer each and every stupifyingly boring question. That's what gets you a 100% - no answers gets you a zero. Because I give you all of the right answers, I should get a hundred. You can't give me zeros just because your class is too easy." By the time Alucard had finished, the priest's brow had ironed itself out so that Father Anderson stood somewhere between smugness and hollow, mindless monotony.
God… His eyes. They're… Anderson suppressed these emotions and removed his glasses, so that the creature's face blurred. Now, the demon was sufferable.
Father Anderson replied quite plainly, pointing his folded glasses at Alucard's blurred-face, "You don't show your work."
"SO WHAT?"
"So, show your work." Anderson lowered the glasses to his side, having finished his 'counter argument.'
The vampire continued to scowl at him, "The answers are there on the page. And they're correct. What else matters?"
"Showing your work matters."
Alucard filled his undead lungs unnecessarily, squinted for a moment, and then was able to bypass the rage that had clogged his throat – and whitened his vision. "It says, answer the questions. And that's what I do. How can you tell me correct answers deserve absolutely zero points?"
"I require students to show their work."
Alucard hissed, then collected himself a second time, shoving his anger behind a much more composed mask. He asked more calmly, "And why is that necessary?"
"Because the student might be cheating."
"Oh! Oh really. Who? Who would I cheat off of? I sit next to a blonde buffoon! You know he's an idiot. You know I'm handing in perfect scores. You're playing dirty, Priest. Dirty."
"I simply require that my students show their work in order to get any credit." Anderson's smile reflected in the vampire's shrunken pupils, and as he felt the demon's bloodlust escalate, Father Anderson replaced his glasses. Each lens glinted as his smile broke into a manic grin.
"Judas!"
A call skewered the moment as it shot down the corridor. An instructor stood outside a classroom and examined them quizzically, not sure how they'd gotten into the building (with the exception of Father Anderson, whom the instructor had let in personally, before locking the door). As the man noticed Walter's age, he assumed this was some sort of family visit (presumably cleared by the office). (Old people just don't make for effective delinquents. For example, the only thing they tend to break (vs windows and public property) are their osteoporosis-thinned hips.) Therefore, the instructor viewed the scenario as a grandfather arriving to see his granddaughter and check on her school/education... How cute.
But he was still displeased about the racket, and so looked disapprovingly at Mr. Anderson, who had failed to do something about the noise earlier. "Please keep it down," the man used a polite tone and wasn't exactly frowning. He waited for an apology, but realized he wasn't getting one. So he gave them a thank you anyway, and pulled out the doorstop so he could shut out any further disturbances – to the best of the door's ability.
Alucard growled, as he wondered what the teachers could be doing in a locked building, being secretive – it was almost cult-like. Anderson, who thought Alucard was growling at him, chuckled quietly. The vampire sought to burn a hole through the Catholic's face with his eyes, but nothing of that sort happened. Only the hole that was the priest's mouth got bigger, as the Catholic bastard priest beamed magnificently at the little pixy-demon – whose height barely reached his ribs.