AN – Thanks to all the reviews, I'm loving it! (Maniacal laugh inserted here) although I think I may have scared a few with the angstyness of it all (?.?), but don't worry there is more to come. Welcome to all the new followers of the story please feel free to review. Loving it? Hating it? Crying about it? I think I heard a few heads explode in the last couple chapters, mawahahah.

On with the story!

'I've forgotten your name.' The words hit me like a large ocean tide.

I looked at Penelope desperately, then at the doctor for an answer. Penelope broke the silence "Emily…it's JJ" she looked at Emily for a reaction. Her brow creased slightly as she tried to remember. She looked at me again, 'Oh my god! She doesn't remember me!' I looked at the doctor again. He had a look of disappointment on his face as he looked at Emily.

"Doctor?" I attempted to get his attention "Is this normal for her injuries?" The doctor seemed to be recomposing himself. "The temporal lobe contains the hippocampus which is the primary agent for long term memory. As far as the scans have shown there isn't any sign of damage. There have been cases of memory loss for people with this type of injury which may or may not return to the individual"

My emotions were in turmoil. 'She doesn't remember me…well she doesn't remember my name…does she remember ANYTHING about me?' I looked at her again, she had an expression of guilt, I realized I was probably making her feel awkward.

"We'll be monitoring her recovery closely" the doctor repeated "unfortunately as long as there is no obvious signs damage there is nothing we can do at this point, we can possibly look into neurological therapy if her memory becomes an issue to her well being. Only time will tell" he tried to be sympathetic.

"If there are no other questions for now, I do have some other patients that I need to attend to. My shift ends in 4 hours, if there is anything I can do for you, please have the nurse page for me" he excused himself and the room became silent.

I forced a smile at Emily, but deep down I was hurt. I had just started to realize my feelings for her, and now she didn't even know who I was. I didn't want to break down in front of her, so I calmly excused myself, quickly standing up from the seat and walked out of the room, closing the door behind me gently. I walked briskly to the elevator, made my way to the ground floor and practically ran out to one of the benches in the quad area of the hospital. I couldn't stop the tears that fell from my eyes as I felt my heart throb.

All my feelings for the past months just overwhelmed me. I didn't realize how much I had bottled up. I was too busy with work and with trying to figure things out with Will that I never had the time to process what was happening between me and Emily.

After about 20 minutes I had gotten myself to calm down. I started to compartmentalize the situation. I still had a baby on the way, I had to figure out what I was going to do about Will. I had just told Garcia that I was trying to get things to work, for the sake of the baby. But I was developing deep feelings for Emily. Maybe it was better that it was happening this way. Maybe it was a sign that I really needed to try and make things work out with Will.

I don't know how long I sat there silently as my emotions settled themselves. I looked at my watch it had been a good hour. 'I better get back' I sighed, I rubbed my eyes clear and ran a hand through my hair. Getting up from the bench I headed back into the hospital, I made a quick stop in the bathroom to check on my appearance, and decided to pick up a coffee from the cafeteria before heading back up to Emily's room.

Coffee in hand, I slowly made my way back to the designated room. I breathed in and tried to clear my mind as I stood just outside the doorway. I heard Penelope and Emily talking, I couldn't make out the conversation. Forcing a smile, I braced myself and walked in.

Emily sat up straighter as I approached them. Penelope went quiet mid-sentence in reaction. "Hey," I said hoarsely. "Um…I'm sorry, I just had to clear my head…" I looked at Penelope "umm… Penelope, if you don't mind I kind of would like to talk to Emily in private" she seemed to understand, throwing a sympathetic smile at both of us, she nodded and excused herself. Emily seemed to shift uncomfortably in the bed. She glanced at me, then looked down as she shifted to sit up even straighter, chewing at the side of her lip, she rolled her head slightly to the side then looked back up at me. It was what she did when she was trying to cover up a feeling of anxiety.

My eyes shifted, I half breathed out and smirked slightly as I read the gesture. 'At least she is still herself'. I tried to genuinely smile back at her, even though I felt sad as I took the seat Penelope was in, placing my cup down on the side table.

"I'm sorry, it's not your fault. It's just…" I looked straight into her eyes and placed my hand over hers "…you just mean a lot to me Emily. I just want you to know that." She was looking right back at me, her eyes seemed sad at the words I had spoken, she was chewing her lip again. I wanted to tell her more, I wanted to tell her everything I was thinking about the past months. But now, with the things the way they are, how do I. I have a baby on the way, how do I tell someone that used to be my best friend, that doesn't remember even me, that I think I'm developing feelings for her. It was awkwardly silent for the next moment, neither of us knowing what to say.

Just then Morgan came walking in loudly announcing his presence. "Hey there princess" he sauntered in happy to see that Emily was awake and surprisingly bright eyed. I pulled my hand away in that moment, straightening myself as I looked at him. He was grinning ear to ear he winked at me as he walked up to her. "How are you feeling? You had us scared there for a moment" I know he would have given her a hug if he could, he settled for giving her hand a squeeze. "Strong as ever, I just can't wait to get out of here" Emily responded back, I frowned 'she remembers Derek'. He started arguing about how she was supposed to rest, feeling a pang of jealousy and helplessness for myself, I stood up and walked out of the room, faking a smile as I passed Reid who had poked his head in the doorway and walked in with his hands in his pockets, he gave me a smile, I heard him join in the conversation with Emily and Derek.

I walked out into the hallway, I rubbed my temples as I stood just outside the doorway. "JJ?" it was Penelope, I breathed in heavily, I rolled my head stretching my neck, breathing out - it caught part way through, my hands fell to my hips, I looked at Penelope tiredly.

She stood up from the seats across the hallway. "Are you okay?" I looked away and pursed my lips. The situation was becoming too much to handle. The stress of everything was starting to overwhelm me. I couldn't stop my eyes from watering. My shoulders began to shake, I couldn't hold it in anymore. "Oh, baby girl, it's going to be okay" she quickly pulled me into a hug, her empathy taking over me "Why me? Why only me?" 'I felt so confused, so overwhelmingly stressed out…so lost' I buried my face into her shoulder and let it all out.

A/N - sorry there isn't more to this chapter, I thought it was thorough enough before a scene change though.