Authors note: Hello again my lovelies! Sorry I forgot my disclaimer last time. Please don't sue me! \(;_;)/ Anyways, the story shall now proceed.

It was a dark and stormy night, and… I don't even know. I think I have a problem with writing true angst. Hope you don't mind.

Disclaimer- Own not Hetalia I do (Who else is ready to watch the new Star Wars?!)

Warning- *distant singing* Lovi has a potty mouth! Lovi has a potty mouth!

~~~~~TOMATOES~~~~~

"Hey fratello! You're looking snazzy! Are you working here now?"

Lovino heard the sound of his brother's voice and sighed slightly. He loved his little bro to death, but now was not the time. Trying his best to ignore him, the Italian smiled at the elderly couple. "Will that be all?"

"Umm, wait a moment. I might want something else. What about you Frank?"

"I'm good. Unless you have apple pie?"

"Yes sir, we have apple pie."

"But Frank, you need to watch your weight! He has diabetes, you know." The small woman whispered the last sentence conspiringly, leaning in near the waiter who had been standing there for the last five minutes as the two tried to decide what they wanted to eat.

Why in the shitting world had he picked a job where he had to deal with actual people? Oh yeah, because it was the only opening in the vicinity.

"Lovino? Can't you hear me?" a pair of arms attached themselves around the brunet's neck, causing him to fall back slightly.

"Godda-" Oops, can't cuss. "-ang't" He finished lamely. "Feli, I'm working. I promise I'll talk to you afterwards."

The lady in front of him giggled. "Oh, are you brothers?"

Damn, she was going to start a conversation. He didn't want to hang around any more than necessary.

"Yep! He's my older brother. Isn't he great~?" As Feliciano started babbling, Lovino took this as his chance. Grabbing the menus, he made his escape back to the kitchen.

"Table 3 wants sautéed shrimp with garlic and a beef tortilla, replace the beef with chicken."

"Aiyah, why didn't they just order a chicken tortilla?" shouted Yao from behind the grill.

"How should I know? The customer is always right." Diners never ceased to amaze. It was like they left their common sense outside chained to a pole. Hurrying back out, he went to table nine.

"Hello, I'm Lovino. May I take your order?" He said hurriedly, not looking up.

"Of course you may." said the patron in a sultry voice. Shit, It was the wine-fucker, wasn't it. Looking up confirmed- no it didn't. That wasn't the frenchie from downstairs. In fact, it looked like a very inebriated blond with huge eyebrows. Wasn't that Alfred's boyfriend? Why did he sound french all of a sudden? In fact, how did he manage to get into this restaurant when he was so obviously wasted?

Glancing around in surprise, the young man caught sight of Alfred animatedly giving another couple the specials. Tapping his shoulder, he caught the american's attention. Pulling him aside with a slight apology to the customers, he hissed to Alfred. "Hey, we have a problem."

"Ha, no worries! I can fix it, after all, I'm the hero!"

Actually, he sounded more like Bob the Builder. "Yeah, well we have a drunk brit with an identity-crisis over at nine."

Hurriedly looking up, Alfred paled. "Aw, c'mon dude! Not again!"

Again? This had happened before? "Fix it. I'll take your orders."

Handing the smaller his notepad with some orders already written on it, the blue eyed man rushed to the table holding a slumped over drunk. Turning to the patrons, he apologized again. "Now, is that all, or would you like something else?"

"I think Lidia might want a chocolate cake. Isn't that right hon?"

"Are you trying to fatten me up Bill? Wait, what are your dessert options?"

Thus the endless cycle of "what about you's" started up again. By the end of his shift, Lovino felt like shooting himself and/or everyone else in this damned building. Either would give him a peaceful feeling of bliss.

After leaving, the college student was pleasantly astounded when a taxi came to a stop in front of him. Of course, where his luck was going, that was going to be the highlight of the day. Arriving at his apartment, Lovino wondered what the fuck he was going to do. He was still locked out. Gathering up all his pride and throwing it into a figurative volcano, the Italian rapped on Antonio's door.

"Oh! Hi Lovi!" This was embarrassing, but who else was he to turn to? Roma was going to be with his lady-friend all day since he was- God no, he was remembering it again. Fuckety fuck with ice cream on top.

Fidgeting slightly, Lovino blushed a bright red. "I know this is a bit much to ask, but do you mind if I stay here overnight?" He asked in an oddly formal voice. Blinking in surprise, Antonio smiled. A wolf whistle came from behind him with loud cheering.

"That's a home run for you, Antonio!" came a loud german voice. Antonio promptly whacked Gilbert in the head.

"Mind your manners mister, or I'll tell Ludwig." He said in a faux-serious voice. The albino shuddered with mock fear.

"Ooh, tell Luddy-kins! I'm so nervous!" he laughed.

"Ludwig? As in, Ludwig Beilschmidt?" asked Lovino curiously, the malice in his voice seemingly unheard.

"The one and only. You know him?" The german tilted his head questioningly.

The Italian grumbled. "Yeah, he's dating my little brother."

Gilbert grinned. "Well shit, your Feli's older brother?"

"There aren't many other Lovino Vargas's around, are there now?" he stated with a menacing glare. The albino didn't seem to understand that he should probably drop the topic. It was his funeral.

"Well then, that means I'll probably be your half bro in a couple years with the way those two are going. Welcome to the family!"

The Italian cringed at the thought. Half brothers with this monster? Just the thought of it made him want to gag. And nobody was marrying his little brother until his age was at least off the military clock. After that, they'd have to somehow charge through him and Roma to get to Feli. A war veteran and a man who acted as if he were in the mafia were not to mess with.

Wait a second. Was wine-fucker home? No way was he sleeping in the same room as that bastard. Miraculously, Antonio was suddenly enlightened for a few quick seconds and was able to read the Italian's nervous face.

"Don't worry. Francis won't be home for the rest of today. Apparently he's staying over at his date's house for… you know."

Lovino did know. Everyone was going at it like rabbits these days, weren't they. Not that he was jealous. Nuh-uh. Single life forever, thats the way he rolled. Totally. The college student somehow didn't completely believe that little voice in his head. "Okay then, so it's fine?" He could overlook the fact that Gilbert was staying in the same apartment. After all, Antonio seemed to have some semblance of control over him.

Antonio stepped back, opening up the hall to him. "It's fine, mi amigo." This man was truly a godsend for Lovi. He could see the halo of light surrounding the spaniard as angels sang in chorus. On the other hand, Gilbert was an interesting send. Probably from the same place the good lord created monstrosities like platypus's and cassowaries. Australia has some freaky animals.

Authors note: You know, sometimes I think that I should visit Australia. But then I remember my mortal fear of bugs. To all, merry Christmas, happy Hanukkah, happy Kwanzaa, and whatever else y'all celebrate. Happy holidays in general. I know I'm going to enjoy this winter break. Beware, winter is coming. XD

You know what would be a great gift? Reviews. That's what.

May lollipops fall from the sky and all turtles fly,

LollipopTurtle