Chapter 38

"Easy does it. Good boy." With a last tug, Dad untied the ropes around Skullcrusher's side. Bundles of wood clattered to the ground. He picked up some and threw them into the smouldering fire.

"How is she?" he asked as he approached us by the fire.

I lifted my wings in a shrug. She was sleeping. Had spent most of the day like that. Not a good sleep, though. It was fitful, and full of mumbles and whimpers. She woke up from time to time, but never seemed fully conscious when she did.

Dad knelt by her head. His shadow passed over me and Toothless who were curled up beside her; Toothless gave her back something to lean against, while I had curled up in the space between her arm and armpit. Dad took a bit of his cape, and used to wipe her pale forehead.

"We passed by a couple of marooned ships," Dad said, "but when the crew jumped ship, they must have taken their medical supplies with them. I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault."

We waited there in the quiet. The fire shone green in Toothless's eyes. Dad had shifted Valka's head so that it rested on his legs. He combed her hair gently, softly humming a song from times gone by. She looked so small; Dad had removed her armour so that we could see her wounds, and ripped apart her cape to make bandages. We'd recovered her staff and mask, and placed it by her head. I had found the shield, too, or what was left of it.

"She'll be alright, Hiccup." His hand curled into a fist. "It's not too bad. There's been plenty of people who have survived worse."

I almost bought it.

The shadows thickened. Toothless slept. Mom and Dad were wreathed in ethereal firelight. Dad had been worried about us inhaling smoke, so he had painstakingly moved her out of the alcove and into the main tunnel. Now, the alcove lurked behind them, gaping like a giant mouth and swallowing the light.

At some point, Dad started to snore. Mom's head was still in his lap, and one of his hands still entangled in her hair. Skullcrusher acted as a hard pillow for him. Without Dad to maintain it, the fire began to die. With each bit of light it lost, more of him was thrown into darkness.

I stood up. I didn't make it more than a foot away before Toothless's eyes snapped open.

"Want to walk with me?"

Our claws clicked. They were sharp noises that broke up the otherwise throaty cloud of Dad and Skullcrusher's snoring. Here in the dark, enough moonlight passed through the icy celling that I could see in shades of silver. In a circle around me, the ground was the color of slate; outside that, almost black. The ceiling was the almost white. Pools gleamed the colour of polished steel, while falling droplets seemed to glow like fireflies. The only exception to this silver rule was Toothless, whose eyes still flashed green whenever he looked upward.

The main chamber was asleep. Rubble from the king's rampage lay all over the ground. He, himself, slept in his signature pool with baby dragons covering every inch of his back. He'd fed them earlier, and even gone overboard in doing so; there were still fish lying around on land and in the water. Some of the latter were still alive.

"I still can't believe this," I whispered. "I know Eret's crew worked for Drago, but how could they have taken down a whole Nest like this? What is he?"

Toothless groaned his rarely-heard echolocation roar. He swept over the Nest with it, as if still unable to believe that almost everyone was gone. Without the king's rambunctious flock, the Nest felt more like a prison than a home. The air was cold and sterile. The walls seemed to fold in so that even with all the empty space, the chamber appeared smaller than it had during our first visit. Even the steady sound of the king's breathing was no longer comforting, but like the shifting of a building about to collapse.

"It's no use. There's nothing here."

Toothless nuzzled my back. His paw hooked over my shoulder and pulled me into his chest. He cooed lightly. Our heartbeats aligned. I knew he wasn't trying to comfort me over the Nest's missing inhabitants.

I broke.

"I don't want her to die!" I curled into him and squashed my cheek against his strong muscles. "It's not fair. Why do I have to lose her again?"

Toothless leaned his weight on me, bringing us down to the ground, but not quite pinning me. He shifted so that my head was between his paws, and one of his legs passed over my body. His tail swung around, boxing me in further.

"I was so stupid. If I hadn't let myself be kidnapped, or hadn't spent so much time fooling around here before, they wouldn't have found out about the Berserks. The king would have been here to protect them. I wish I never found this place!"

Toothless patiently waited my rant out. His sad scent was all around me. He licked me from my tail all the way up to the back of my head. And did it again, and again; smooth and steady, like a caress. Each time, the lick said something else:

Not your fault. It's okay. I'm here. I love you.

I'll always be here.

Despite Dad's best efforts, we had arrived too late. Mom passed on in the early morning. I didn't realize anything was wrong at first, until Dad's mournful wail filled the tunnel. Then the silence coming from the body struck me along with the chilling scent of death, and I wondered how I could have missed it.

She didn't have much in the way of clothes. Dad replaced those he could, and thoroughly washed the rest. He couldn't get all the blood out, but at least her clothes no longer looked like they had been dyed in blood. He carefully strapped on her armour after that ("A Viking should be laid to rest in nothing less," he said), and while he didn't put the mask on her face, he placed it on her chest along with her staff. The babies watched us; they sniffed and a few even darted forward to nudge her hand, but otherwise accepted it quickly. The king said nothing to me, but he stared at her a long time before returning to his lonely pool.

As Dad folded her hand over the staff, Toothless came up behind me. I expected to feel his heat against me, but didn't quite get that. Toothless prodded me with his snout, huffing and flicking his ears in a different direction. Come with me. I want to show you something.

"Not now." I hissed. When Toothless insisted, I snapped at him and snarled.

"Shh." Dad's fingers ran down my back. With the back of his hand, he nudged Toothless away. "It's alright. Save it for the one who's responsible."

With a shudder, I did my best to smother my anger. Dad's demeanour was so calm and loving even as everything about his wife screamed Dead! I envied that. I wish I could be like him. But how do you even begin to become someone that great?

Dad stood slowly. "Those ships I found early are too damaged to carry her, but there was a pinnace on one of them. It should be seaworthy."

He whistled for and saddled Skullcrusher quickly. The babies, realizing two of the three adults were about to leave, squeaked and whistled in alarm. The king didn't stir. Back facing all of us, he stayed in his pool.

Then, just as I was about to take off and join the others, the king spoke. Where are you going?

We're going to grab something from one of the shipwrecks. It's for her.

. . . I will come with you.

As promised, the king shadowed us to the wreck. He surfaced as Dad tugged at the pinnace, trying to wrestle it free. Ice had caught most of the back half, anchoring the pinnace securely. At least, it was secure until Skullcrusher rammed it. The first time, deep, jagged cracks appeared. After a second go, it broke completely.

"We got a bit of extra ice here," Dad muttered. "So long as it floats. We need to figure out how to carry it now –"

The boat rocked. The king had rubbed it against it. He lowered himself so that his back was level with the deck.

Dad and I glanced at each other. Then, with the dragons' help, we dragged the pinnace toward the waiting king. Even with his spines, it was rather easy to find a place to put it. Afterwards, we tore planks from the deck for fuel later, and piled them onto the king's back.

By the time we dropped the supplies on the beach and returned to the Nest, I'm sure the babies all had a chance to sniff Mom. Very few of them still studied her, but they hadn't ventured far away. Either way, they all shrieked and swarmed us when we entered. The king rumbled and endured the clinging babies patiently. I'm sure he must have told them he'd return soon, but they all acted like he'd been away for a year.

"I'll carry her," Dad said. "You three wait outside."

Once again, the king joined us. He remained on shore, with the babies cluttered on his back. Toothless sat by me, but Skullcrusher was sniffing at something by a cluster of rocks. Whatever. I wasn't going to ruin this just to yell at him.

Dad walked through the hole his majesty had created yesterday. He held Mom in his arms, his upper arm cradling her head so it didn't flop back. The mask rested safely in her lap, but he held the staff in one hand. It dragged against the ground, carving a deep groove into the earth.

He stopped as his feet met sand, blinking as his eyes adjusted to the outside light. He murmured, "It's a beautiful day. The kind you love."

The pinnace was waiting. It was nothing fancy, but at least we had been able to pile those boards to make a crude pyre for her. Dad laid her on top, arranging her so that her hand was folded over her staff and mask again.

"Skullcrusher." At the sound of his rider's call, the dragon came thundering over. Dad reached into one of his saddlebags, and pulled out a baby-sized axe. He chuckled, but it sounded forced. "You remember this, don't you, Valka? You nearly took Gobber's other hand when Hiccup got this for his first birthday. I wanted Hiccup to come in swinging it. Thought you might get a kick out of that."

He tilted the axe so that his eye looked back at him from the head. Then he placed it back into the saddlebag, and pulled out a small knife. "We don't have much to send you off with. I didn't expect . . . I pilfered some of your things when we went looking for nicer clothes. Nothing fit for any wife of mine, but . . . better than nothing, I suppose."

He placed the knife by her side. Wordlessly, arm jerky and pale like he was sick, he removed several other things from the saddlebag and placed them next to her. Most were things we had found in her "room" inside the Nest. Others were knickknacks brought from home that must have meant something to them. I stalked over from where I had been watching with Toothless, and jumped onto the saddlebag. Dad said nothing as I removed that baby-sized axe and added it to her pile. With tears in his eyes, Dad looked at me and nodded, approving.

Then, he took off his helmet.

This time, the tears fell. He smiled and said, "Got to make sure they know she's one of us."

He placed it on her chest right next to the mask.

The pinnace set sail. It drifted away slowly, like it didn't want to leave. The sail, rolled up tight, shivered as a cold wind caught it. The oars – four on one side, three-and-a-half on the other – made ripples that marked their journey.

"Dad . . ." I drew a triangle in the sand, and a line that attached to the bottom edge. "We don't have any arrows."

He looked at the drawing. "It might be best we don't have those. Her life was all about the dragons, wasn't it?"

I understood immediately. I took some time to steel myself; this was just another duty. It had to be done. And it was for her . It was . . . it was the least I could do after everything. Toothless tried to follow me, but I barked and growled until he understood to stay.

She looked so peaceful. In death, her lips had parted a little, just like Dad's did when he began snoring. He'd torn off the ragged edges of her cape so that while it was shorter, she looked more regal. Like a queen. That cape fanned out from under her body, but Dad had rolled up the sides so that they enclosed the grave goods we'd sent her off with. The arm not over her chest lay delicately by her side. Near the hand was a jade necklace, the chain strewn in her direction, as if she had tried to pull it to her one last time.

"I'm so sorry, Mom." I wish I could cry; if not for myself, then at least for her.

With my nose I found the driest part of the ship. I set it alight.

It was slow going. Little grey curls danced along the ship's deck like low-lying fog. The remaining ice glistened as the hungry flames grew. Drops of water fell upon the wood, only to immediately evaporate with a sizzle. I hovered above the boat, following along as the current took it further from shore. Dad grew smaller and smaller in the background.

As the fire grew and coughed up dark smoke, it became harder to see her. I held onto what patches I could spot, and they dragged me along like an iron chain. But the time came eventually. The wood around her glowed red as her face disappeared under the smoke for the last time. And with that, it struck me. It was done. She was gone. Really gone.

This time, she wouldn't come back.

I returned to shore, still tasting smoke. Dad waited there, eyes closed, head bowed, and hands clasped pressed together in prayer. He opened his eyes as I hovered in front of him. His hands turned so that they were palm-up and I could land. His beard was thick with tears.

"The only thing worse than losing someone is losing them again," he said. Yet even through his grief, he found the strength to smile. "I'm glad I could be there with her in the end. That I could know that she died surrounded by those who loved her. I think that's why the gods let us find her again: so that we could make sure she reached her proper place in the afterlife. I just hope we gave her some peace before she died."

I pressed my forehead against his, and whimpered. I don't think I was capable of speech. I felt rank and greasy inside, like my heart was rotting between my ribs.

He held me close, crying silently to himself. His hand rubbed up and down on my back, as he had done long ago when I was young. I lay limp. I didn't want to move anymore.

Hiccup, said the king as he retreated back into the Nest, when you are ready, come find me. We must discuss what happened here.

I didn't respond.

In the distance, Mom's pyre burned. It was like a far-off lantern guiding us home. Dad whistled under his breath. I turned and stared at the ship, unable to take my eyes off it.

"I'll swim and sail on savage seas . . ."

Pressed up against his neck, I could feel his throat vibrate as he sung softly.

". . . with ne'er a fear of drowning."

The tones were low and melodic, like a lullaby.

"And gladly ride the waves of life . . ."

His grip slackened. Before I fell, I scrambled onto his shoulder.

" . . . if you would marry me."

He dropped onto his knees, and sobbed. I pressed against him, ears tucked against my skull so I didn't have to hear. It was . . . this was the end. She wasn't coming back.

Toothless came up. He huffed and flicked his ears. I want to show you something.

"Go away!" I snapped.

But he insisted. Finally, to avoid him bothering Dad, I listened. Toothless led me to where Skullcrusher was waiting. The Rumblehorn had returned to that cluster of rocks, sniffing at something in the sand. Whatever it was, it was crumbled and scaly –

A cloak. I sniffed it.

It hadn't belonged to her.

I had to take a second to calm myself down. "Skullcrusher, can you track it?"

Skullcrusher cocked his head.

"Track it. Skullcrusher, track it!" My tendrils flared as I slammed my paws onto the cloak. I inhaled; it hadn't been touched for a couple of days, but there was enough scent to memorize it. Male. Older male, about Dad's age. A warrior. The cloak reeked of spilt blood. I doubted much of it was his.

Skullcrusher glanced at Dad. His shoulders shook as he sobbed into his hands.

I shook my head. "No. Give him time to grieve."

As for me, I would grieve later. I was going to find Drago Bludvist. I didn't know what I would do when I found him, but I would find him.

I had to find him.

I took a rock and slashed a quick message in the sand to Dad in huge letters. The message was right behind him so he wouldn't miss it. Then, we took off. Skullcrusher should have led but once we had the general direction, I pulled ahead of him. I had to. He was flying too slow. It felt like my wings weren't catching enough air and I would fall, even though I had flown at much more leisurely speeds before.

Perhaps a few minutes later, my tendrils flared.

Hiccup, said the king's sharp voice, where are you going?

It took longer than usual to understand him. Despite the harshness of his tone, he was much quieter than I was used to. We must have been close to leaving his telepathy range.

We have Drago Bludvist's scent, I told his majesty. We're tracking him.

. . . We? Who else is with you? Hiccup, you must return to the Nest!

I bared my teeth. No. Not until I find him.

Hiccup! Even with the diminished volume, I could tell he was yelling. You are leading them into a trap!

An image flashed in front of my eyes. I forced myself not to look at it, to see through it to our destination. From the scene I caught however, it seemed to be some muddied-up vision of the king.

We're not going to fight him, I said back. I just need to find him. Then you and I can take Drago on together.

Hiccup -!

I can't stand around here and do nothing!

Return at once! bellowed the king. It is not Drago Bludvist that we must fight against. There is –

I tucked in my tendrils and shut him out. He was wrong. Drago Bludvist did this. Mom told me so. I was going to find him for Dad and the king, and then we . . . I . . .

We would kill him.

I could still hear the king shouting at me, but with my tendrils tucked in, his voice was a buzz and easily ignored. Toothless barked; his tendrils were flared and his eyes didn't seem to be right. He and Skullcrusher had slowed to a near-stop.

"Come on." I barked at them. When they hesitated, I repeated myself. "Come on!"

They did.

Review Response:

Jazz:Not for Hiccup! Hiccup can master extreme dragon flying in no time! (Although it was never said just how much time passed during the See You Tomorrow montage)

I imagine the Louts survive on seafood and by trading for food. In canon, they had a thriving slave industry, but that's all I know.

Nope, the king had never seen sheep before. He now views them the same way we view hamster: utterly adorable.

The king will do his best to keep a strong appearance, but the disappearance of the dragons has hit him hard. He's going through his own quiet breakdown, especially now that Hiccup and co. have run off.

The ice in the Nest is constantly melting, especially without his majesty to maintain it. So the babies had water. It was just food they were lacking.

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Lazy Reviewer: Poor king (But dragons can't cry, silly!;p)

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Leska: Okay, okay!