15: Diamonds of Memory

"Today is not yesterday: we ourselves change; how can our works and thoughts, if they are always to be the fittest, continue always the same? Change, indeed is painful; yet ever needful; and if memory have its force and worth, so also has hope."

-Thomas Carlyle

"Wha…what are you doing!? Don't you knock!" She finally managed to exclaim when she got her breath, her face still a deep red as she slammed the door, as if pushing it completely closed helped her hide her embarrassment a little more.

"This is the second door on the right…" He commented coolly after a moment. "I asked you to go into the second door on the left. This is my room. I was coming in to turn my water on before delivering the dress to the room I asked you to wait in."

She thought about it for a while.

"Damn! Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn. Now I can't tell left from right?! What the hell is wrong with me!?" She was still cursing herself when he spoke again.

"If you could finish and relocate yourself to the room I originally asked you to use it would be appreciated." His tone was always so arrogant. "I will give you a few minutes to dress. Try not to linger too long."

She listened until the door closed again and let the breath she was holding out.

"Damn damn damn damn damn!" She continued her new mantra as she dashed from the bathroom for the dress he was offering her as if it were some sort of sanctuary from a burning sun. "I am such an idiot! He was finally being a little nicer too. I always manage to screw up."

She tugged the bag that was around the saving grace of the clothes he had for her. Anything had to be better than the towel or the lack of anything he'd seen her in before. She was still trying to push the blush away when she stopped to stare at what she'd been offered.

The dress was just gorgeous, after she picked it up she had to give a moment's pause to stare at it. It was a long shimmering tinsel silver in color, a velvet silk fabric that was definitely more formal than she had expected him to offer. She didn't let herself linger too long in appreciation, knowing she was already pressing her luck she slipped herself into the dress. It felt amazing, both smooth and cool, it was just enjoyable to let it slide over her skin. She doubted she'd ever be able to afford such a nice dress herself.

She was having some trouble with the zipper but she managed to get it up - which involved a lot of reaching over her shoulders and jumping and other interesting uncommon movements. She felt around the back and pulled free a bag that had been hanging near the zipper, blinking at it she pulled out a detailed platinum and diamond necklace, smaller diamonds were actually worked into it's full length save for the clasp in the back. There was a small pendant where three smaller chains ended in curled pink diamonds, making them look like flower pedals. It was the most detailed and gorgeous piece of jewelry she'd ever seen…she just blinked at it.

"He couldn't want me to wear this…" She thought blankly, unsure of what to think of all of this finery. "Would it be more insulting to ask about it after he gave it to me to wear though? It seems safer to actually wear it so I won't lose it if nothing else."

She moved her arms back, she hadn't worn many necklaces but she'd tried them on with friends at the store enough times that she managed to get the easy clasp closed, settling the necklace. She paused to brush through her hair, it seemed so odd to not have it brushed being in such attire. It had already started to dry so it managed to be a little shiny, though it didn't quite match the shimmering pale moonlight of the gown.

For the first time she realized that she had been developing more as a woman, her breasts filling out the front of the hourglass styled dress nicely, it fit her curves so perfectly it was almost as if it had been made for her. There was a slit up either side to about the middle of her hips, offering an easy way to walk - something so often forgotten in such finery. The straps were only over her shoulders with slight bits of thin satiny fabric to cover just the tops of her shoulders-making her glad she remembered to shave her armpits recently.

There had been pantyhose in the bag but no shoes, leaving her feet to slide across the floor, she had to admit that she sort of liked the feel of the thick carpet through the gray hose. She always had sort of enjoyed that sensation but hadn't thought about it in ages with as much as she ended up wearing socks with her uniform.

She was still looking at the dress when there was a knock at the door this time. Outside Byakuya was vaguely irritated that she'd mistaken his instructions and doing his best not to dwell on images of a stark naked Kagome. He didn't think she'd gone to his room on purpose, especially after the yelp she'd let out - certainly it wasn't the most appropriate of situations but she didn't need to react as she did.

"It's okay, I'm dressed now." She called from the other side of the door. At the permission to enter his own room - bothersome but understood in the current situation - he moved inside and paused. That was the dress they got when he asked for something for her to wear?

She did look stunning in it…only more so by the blush still clinging to her cheeks - there was a natural beauty as opposed to all the make up most women seemed to be obsessed with. Her hair was still a little damp but she'd brushed it out rather well and while she didn't have shoes she would have otherwise been almost a perfect partner for a dance.

He had to school the surprise that leaked through when he widened his eyes a moment.

"The necklace was with that gown as well? What does my staff think it's getting at?"

It was difficult to hide away the moment of pain that accompanied the site of the jewelry after so long and it was more than likely someone as empathetic as Kagome had picked it up but he didn't dwell nor allow his emotions to enter into his voice. "You look nice. Could you wait for me downstairs? I will need to speak with my staff and clean up myself."

She nodded, offering a curious glance that told him she had indeed seen his moment of weakness but was being polite enough to listen as opposed to pry. Byakuya closed the door after she left and leaned on it, letting his stoic face fade away as he closed his eyes, trying to push away the memories that had been brought back so vividly.

"How could I ever forget her smile that day…"

It was starting to get warmer in the equivalent of early spring for soul society. Though it was still cool enough that those that could afford the clothing had at least a jacket or lighter coat on when they were walking outside. The cool was turning more cold as the sun began to set, basking the streets in a deceptively golden glow as the warmth started to seep away as the night began.

The streetlamps were being lit even as the lightning bugs began their evening dance, making everything so surreal…

She was a bit cool so he'd let her use his scarf, he didn't care what the rumors might be or what whispers the onlookers would have about them. He was so content just to be walking with her that he didn't want the oncoming night to have to pause their time together…

He hadn't asked her yet…he'd been meaning to ask her all day and couldn't find the words.

It wasn't as if he was a bashful man - in fact he was always the opposite…but how was he suppose to ask the woman he loved if she would marry him.

Then she brightened and pointed at that necklace, it was expensive but she hadn't even looked at that, she had just commented at how beautiful she thought the pedals were. How could he not have gotten it for her? It really would be the perfect present when he finally asked her to be his bride.

Byakuya frowned then, remembering that it was being worn again now…and not by the woman who it was intended for. He didn't blame Kagome, she couldn't have known and he had brought the clothing himself for her… "The things she must be thinking of me right now? How can I talk about honorable intentions when I cross such lines without thinking? I hope she take it as just borrowing the clothing and not as a gift."

He was going to murder one of his staff before the day was out.

He pushed himself away from the door, he'd already spent too long lingering on days that were lost to him. He didn't have the luxury of dwelling on pleasant memories when there was so much work to be done. He let the water of the shower wash over him once he'd undressed, using it as a way to pull his mind from the haunting images of his lost wife. He had much to do if he was going to get Kagome to a decent level of training, she was much older than most that took up such training and it was harder for her to grasp concepts that children would accept more easily.

He managed to shift his train of thought to a plan as to how to continue with Kagome's studies, getting dressed and moving back downstairs minus his usual kensaiken, he didn't tend to put them in while his hair was still wet and it left him with a certain roguish allure with them out. Dressed in a suit to boot, he was always managing to be the drawing man.

Though he came in to find Kagome making notes about the book she'd been assigned to report on in class, glad to see at least she did seem set to keep up with her work. That was a good quality in anyone, hard work. When she looked up and smiled at him his mind flickered back over the bright smile Hasana had given him so many times. Was she that different?

"I was wondering if you were okay." She commented softly, watching him now instead of her book. "I finished a few chapters and made some notes and was wondering if I should ask someone to find you…one of your butlers came in and brought some tea. Do you want some?"

He hadn't moved, it was still so hard to watch someone else in her engagement present…it was so unexpected that he couldn't quite manage to move in and give a polite reply. "Did they put her up to this? Or are they just out to fluster me? She couldn't know…but…"

He shook his head then, trying to get more echoing memories from repeating themselves more than they already had. The only people that knew how much Hisana and he enjoyed tea had been moved to work in the mortal realm so he wouldn't have to see them as much after her death…

"Are they trying to punish me for banishing them away from the main estate?" Byakuya wondered idly, noting then that Kagome had gotten up and was giving him that worried look he'd seen her give a few times before.

"Are you okay?" He knew the question was coming.

"I don't believe I am." He answered honestly, the lie was to follow. "I think the rain has gotten to me and I'm feeling a little sick. I apologize for the inconvenience. I will make sure your other clothes are dried and we'll continue your training tomorrow. Feel free to eat or finish what work you can while you wait."

"Oh…" She nodded at that, the smile she offered this time more reassuring. "Okay. I hope you start feeling better then. If there's anything I can do just ask."

"To take that necklace off." He thought idly, looking away from her - he couldn't manage to watch her…though his words didn't match his thoughts. "No, thank you Kagome. I will see you tomorrow. Good night."

He did his best not to rush when he left, walking with his usual pace back to his room…closing the door to lean on it again for the second time…

"I am such a weak man." He thought with a sigh. "Tomorrow she won't have the necklace and the workers will be corrected…everything will get back on the right track. I won't let myself be distracted anymore."

Kagome was pondering after Byakuya's odd behavior…it made sense that he might not feel well but it seemed so much like an empty excuse it was hard to convince herself that it was true. Though she had no real idea of what the alternative could be…he was so distant and distracted.

"As if his mind was in another world or time." She pondered with a smile, blushing some as she remembered the way his hair fell into his face without the hair pieces he commonly wore. She knew the road she was going down was a dangerous one, but it didn't hurt to admit the guy was definitely cute.

She smiled at that and returned to her book while she waited to hear about her clothes.

End Chapter

I had fun with this chapter. Wanted to toss in a little backstory for Byakuya of my own - as there is so little actually offered in the series! I want more about him! I am a fan girl - I demand more Byakuya! Rawr! Anyway, posting this and going to bed, I stayed up way to late finishing it.

-Aura

P.S. I did enjoy Kagome bitching Byakuya out…twas also fun to write.