Buffy crouched in the back of the car while Spike did a recon run. Xander leaned back and looked at her. She wasn't acting like her normal, confident self. He could see her agitation in her every action. She was barely holding on. He watched her rub her arms and suppress a shiver. Her eyes were glassy and her breathing was uneven. This was not good, not good at all.

"Are you okay, Buffster?"

"Doesn't matter. I can do this. I will get them out of there if it can be done." She rolled her shoulders and tilted her head side to side.

"What happened to you in there when he had you?" Xander asked her softly. "It wasn't just a fight was it?"

"No, there wasn't a fight at all. He hired some humans to drug me and had me chained before I came around. Angelus doesn't live for the fight. He doesn't even like to fight. He can throw down, don't get me wrong, but he gets his jollies in other ways." She shuddered and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Xander watched her shudder at the thought.

"No. I'm not ready to talk about it with anyone. Spike and Giles know what happened, but I'm not ready."

"Okay, I mean if you need me." Xander shrugged.

"Xan, I need you all the time. You are one of my best friends. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you. I never forget that."

"I'm sorry. I've been kind of a dick about everything since Deadboy went evil. I was scared and, well, jealous. I wanted you to see me, but I've never even been a blip on your radar." He shook his head. "Wow, that makes me sound like a douche."

"No, I love you, just not like that."

"Yeah, you've made that pretty clear. I mean moving us all in with Spike and you sleeping with him. I get it."

"What do you get, Xander? He saved me. Angelus wasn't going to kill me quickly. Pike got me out of there and now I scream at night if I can't smell him. We aren't fucking." He winced as much at her harsh tone as her rough words. "I've kissed him. It was nice. Really nice and I'd like to do more, but I'm not sure I'll ever be able to let anyone touch me again after what Angelus did."

"Buffy, I'm sorry. It's just I guess I don't get it. I want you to be happy though. If Spike helps you sleep at night and keeps us all alive, I'll learn to tolerate him. I won't like him, but I will play nice."

Xander watched as she shifted uncomfortably. She wrapped her arms tighter around her body, and he could hear her teeth gritting against each other. He closed his eyes and tried to figure out what to say.

"It's okay, Xander. I don't expect things to be perfect. I'm a slayer. It isn't going to end with a white picket fence unless I'm skewered on one by my first love. I've figured that out. Destiny sucks."

"Yeah," Xander watched her loosen her arms and square her shoulders. "I wish it could be easier though."

"I've got it better than most. Giles is the best watcher ever and I have a real life with friends and everything." She reached over the seat and squeezed his shoulder gently.

Spike opened the back door and slid in next to Buffy closing the door quietly. He hugged her with one arm as she curled herself into his side. Xander watched as the vampire gently stroked her hair back and looked down into her eyes. It bothered him to watch her with another animated corpse, but he kept his mouth shut for once. Buffy needed him to understand.

"He's in there with the two of them alone. I don't think we'll get a better window. I smelled about nine new minions, but they left with Dru maybe half an hour to an hour ago. I could hear two hearts beating. I could hear some conflict, but he's playing with them right now. Waiting for us. From the sounds I'd say Oz would be in bad shape."

Buffy nodded stiffly and grabbed his hand. "What's the best way in?"

"Through the front door. Quick in and quick out." Spike turned and grabbed the door to let them out.

"Wait," Xander said. "Maybe I should go with you. If it's only Angel in there, I might be able to help."

"Not Angel, mate, Angelus, there's a bit of difference though not as much as either monickered menace would like you to believe." Spike looked at him and shrugged.

"If we had another driver I'd take you in a minute, but, Xander, this sounds like a trap. We are going to need you out here if we have any hope of saving them." Buffy looked at him with a steady, determined gaze. "Ten minutes, Xander, fifteen at the most. We are in and out, or we're dead. You get back to the house and tell Giles to get you all to safety."

"You should be able to see us go in from here. Start your count then. We'll be coming back." Spike also met his gaze steadily. "I'll get them all out in the best shape I can."

Xander watched as they slid out the back door and disappeared into the night. He wished he'd stopped Willow and Oz. Now he was going to have three friends carrying around way more baggage than he could imagine. Buffy was stronger than anyone. If she was broken, Willow and Oz were going to need serious help. Hell, Buffy had stayed in bed for a while. They could be laid up for months.

"What the hell are we going to do?" His voice sounded really loud in the empty car. He trained his eyes on the front door of the mansion waiting to see Buffy and Spike charge to the rescue. He saw Buffy and Spike glance in his direction as they moved in unison through the double doors. He stared at the clock and started to pray.