Nanao grunted as she threw herself over the last hurdle, dropped into a crouch, and then started scrambling under the wires on elbows and knees. The rain started coming down harder and she was glad Kuchiki had broken her glasses the day before as if she'd chosen to wear them today they would have only been a hindrance. She dragged herself the last foot, leapt to her feet, and sprinted towards the finish line. She was still last, but not nearly as far behind as she had been when she'd begun weeks ago.
"Well now that we're done waiting for the princess to finish, I guess we can all head out," Ikkaku called with a laugh. The other men grumbled and some started to stomp off through the rain.
"What is it with men and idiotic nicknames?" Nanao groused, hating being soaked to the skin and muddy. "Why can't we all just call each other by our names? It's why we have them in the first place."
"You never seemed to mind Kyouraku Taicho doing the same, Nanao-chan," Ikkaku taunted with a laugh. "Though I guess you were getting something on the other end of that."
"Hey, we'd be happy to supply that too," another man called to a chorus of laughs.
"You need some loving Nanao-chan?" one of them cooed. "You didn't have to go through all this to get our attention. What's good enough for Kyouraku's bed is surely good enough for ours."
"I would advise you to hold your tongues. Now." Nanao glared at them each in turn, and most had enough sense to back down some. Unfortunately not all of them did.
"That time of the month?" Ikkaku asked chortling next to his ever present sidekick Yumichika, who was clean and dry under an umbrella since he'd claimed he was too beautiful to participate.
Nanao let her rage win out and blasted Ikkaku off his feet and head over heels on to his ass with a flick of her fingers. Then she shot a ping pong sized burning kido ball over to hover a centimeter from his face effectively keeping him pinned to the ground. The rain sizzled and evaporated before it could even come close to touching the glowing sphere of light. "It's hot enough to burn right through your skull and brain," she commented lightly. "I wouldn't sit up if I were you."
"What the hell is wrong with you woman?" Ikkaku demanded groping for his sword while he remained flat on his back.
"Just because the 11th doesn't like kido doesn't make it any less deadly," she said coldly. "I put up with your criticisms and deplorable humor because I need the training you provide, but I would caution you all never to forget that I was a fukutaicho in my own right. I may not be able to match your physical endurance on the training field, but believe me when I say I can splatter your brains across the ground whenever it so pleases me. Now I'm going to teach you a very important life lesson. A woman's private life is just that, private, and just because a woman gets pissed off does not mean she is on her monthly, and you better thank whatever kami you hold dear that I'm not, otherwise you really would be dead. Now stop being an asshole, and that goes for all the rest of you too."
That said she flicked her hand and the kido dissipated leaving only a rising ball of steam in its wake. Most of the men made fleeting half bows to her and turned tail and ran, looking considerably paler. "Rough morning?" Yumichika asked moving so that his umbrella covered her as well.
"Not particularly," she said with a shrug, ringing out her hair casually. "I have just reached the end of my tolerance on this particular matter."
"Let's fight," Ikkaku called gleefully. "Your kido bullshit against my sword.
"Not in the mood," she said simply.
He charged her and she shunpo side stepped throwing a binding at his feet and letting him plough head first into the ground. He whipped up to attack her again and two shots of kido had him staggering backwards instantly.
"I said, I'm not in the fucking mood," she growled, blasting him once more. He grinned at her and looked intent on attacking her again when she placed a kido box shield around his head. After a few seconds and a look of surprise she saw the panic seep into his features.
"What's that?" Yumichika asked curiously.
"Simple shielding spell," she said cocking her head and watching the man struggle. "Just happens to occur with a vacuum inside."
"You mean he's suffocating?" Yumichika clarified.
"Slowly," she confirmed with a twisted little smile.
"You going to kill him?" Yumichika asked calmly. "It's a decidedly unbeautiful way to go."
"Too much paperwork," she said with a sad little sigh, and cut the spell off, letting the man drop to his knees and gasp for air. The two men that had remained from the training session quickly made a hasty retreat.
"How?" Ikkaku choked out.
"Kido master, dumbshit," she said caustically. "Just because Kyouraku Taicho didn't let me fight doesn't mean I can't. And for your information, he was only allowed to call me Nanao-chan, because he could have kicked my kido master ass at any given moment. Until you can say the same, I'd stick with Ise-san."
"Told you not to make her mad, baldie," a bubbly voice cried out as Yachiru seemed to appear out of nowhere. "You should see the things she's done to Pink Man over the years, and she liked him."
"Kusajishi fukutaticho," Nanao greeted.
"You look like you got in a fight with a mud monster," Yachiru observed happily. "And lost."
"Thanks," Nanao said sarcastically.
"You should have refused to participate," Yumichika advised with a shrug.
"Not everyone is a baby like you," Yachiru shouted and lobbed a ball of mud at the pretty boy. He gave a shriek and dodged resulting in Ikkaku taking the mud directly to the face.
"You little brat," Ikkaku called, instantly scooping up mud and throwing it at her. It splattered at Nanao's feet where the girl had been standing a moment before, and the weight on Nanao's shoulder told her the girl had scrambled behind her back for protection. Yachiru stuck out her tongue over Nanao's shoulder and Nanao had to drop quickly to avoid the next firing of mud.
"Why are you all children?" Nanao yelled, chucking her own ball of mud back at Ikkaku.
"Because it's fun," Yachiru cried tackling Yumichika at the waist.
"You're dead!" the man screamed as he scrambled out of the mud puddle he'd been knocked into. The rain picked up another notch and the field dissolved into chaos as they all started chucking mud at each other.
Nanao was thoroughly drenched and mud covered as she and Yachiru entered the women's baths in the 11th division an hour later.
"Oh man, did you see when I got pretty boy, bam right in the eye?" Yachiru asked still bouncing around wildly running off the adrenaline from the mud fight.
"It was a good shot," Nanao conceded as she deftly caught the little girl and dragged the top of her uniform off her mud plastered head.
"And you got baldie right in the back of the skull with that one glob," Yachiru chattered as she climbed out of her sodden hakama. "Almost looked like he had hair for a moment."
Nanao laughed and started pulling her own uniform off, thankful that the 2nd division training had been canceled that day due to a mission. Her shoulder protested from an old injury as her sleeve got stuck and she grimaced as she tugged the top the rest of the way off.
"Oh wow!" Yachiru said bounding up on a stool to get a better look at Nanao's torso. "That bruise looks just like a bunny."
Nanao glanced down and had to admit that if she were seeing the bruise right side up it probably would look like a bunny, although it was surprising that that was the first thing Yachiru saw.
"And that big bruise next to it looks like a wolf that's about to rip it into teeny tiny bunny bits," the little girl said thoughtfully.
Ok, now that sounded about right. Nanao laughed and shook her head as she stripped down the rest of the way and led the way to the shower stalls. "Do you need help?" she asked, suddenly curious about Yachiru's hygiene habits. It wasn't like there were a lot of women in the 11th to help her. They were completely alone in the baths and come to think of it there hadn't been but one other girl in all the training sessions Nanao had participated in.
"Course I can do it alone," Yachiru stated with a huff. "I haven't had to have Ken-chan help in years."
"Of course, you're right, my mistake," Nanao said with a smile. The picture of Kenpachi helping a little girl with her bath time was an odd one in Nanao's mind. She'd helped Shunsui a few times with some of his cousin's children over the years, and for some reason she just couldn't picture Kenpachi being able to do the same. Shunsui had infinite amounts of fun taking bubbles and letting the kids make different kinds of beards on him. He'd also created some of the grandest games of battleship with their toy boats that Nanao had ever witnessed. No, when she pictured Kenpachi helping someone in the bath she pretty much pictured him dumping dishwashing soap on the kid's head and then throwing a bucket of water over them.
Nanao enjoyed the hot water of the showerhead as she meticulously scrubbed the excess mud off her flesh. Lightning lit up the windows for a moment and she waited patiently for the boom of thunder that followed. She'd always loved thunderstorms. She'd spent many of them curled up with a good book, and she thought she might do the same later tonight. Right now though, she wanted nothing more to finish washing and then relax in the hot bath water. One thing to be said for the 11th's public baths was that it didn't get very busy on the women's side.
Nanao rinsed out the last of her hair and stood up to check on Yachiru in the next stall over. The little girl had managed to get water everywhere except where she needed it the most. Currently she was trying to hit a fly with the spraying water. Nanao shot off a small kido spell and nailed the fly. It fluttered to the ground and Yachiru turned her attention back to Nanao.
"Cool, show me how," she demanded.
"I don't think Kenpachi Taicho would be too happy if I did," Nanao said smiling. "The 11th doesn't exactly approve of my kido."
"Whatever, Ken-chan wouldn't care if I did it," Yachiru stated confidently. Nanao was suddenly sure that was true. Yachiru's confidence in her ability to get away with anything could have rivaled Nanao's own childhood confidence in the same thing with her own Taicho.
"Maybe another time," Nanao conceded. "Let me get your hair."
"I said I don't need help," the little girl argued putting her hands on her hips and thus accidentally pointing the showerhead at her towel draped over a stool out of the way.
"I didn't say you did need help," Nanao replied. "I'd just like to do it."
"Is this because you aren't going to be a mom?" Yachiru asked cocking her head.
"What?" Nanao asked genuinely confused.
"I heard people saying they felt sorry for you because you wanted to be the mom of Pink Man's kids and now this other lady is doing it."
"Oh," Nanao said dumbly. Kami, could no one in the Seireitei mind their own damn business? "I didn't actually want kids."
"Ever?" Yachiru asked curiously.
Nanao used the girl's interest to her advantage and pulled the showerhead from her hand starting in on the little pink monster's hair. "Well, maybe someday, but not now."
"Why not now?"
"Because I like my job," Nanao said simply. "If I were a mom I'd have to stay home and make sure the baby was ok all the time. Not every kid is as resilient as you." In fact, she was pretty sure the word resilient didn't begin to cover it, but it was the only thing she could think to use. "You've got to feed them, and change their diapers, and make sure they don't get into trouble."
"Sounds boring," Yachiru said, slapping at Nanao's hand as she tugged at a snarl.
"Yeah, really boring," Nanao agreed, trying to make herself believe it as strongly.
"I bet brainy braid girl could make you a baby that wouldn't be so boring," Yachiru said referring to Nemu.
Nanao shuddered at the thought and tried to keep her tone neutral. "If I want children there are plenty of kids in the Rukongai that need a home. I doubt I'll need one made."
"Your brother lives in the Rukongai doesn't he?" Yachiru asked squirming in her hold. Nanao adjusted easily holding her in place. She'd gotten good at countering sneaky body movements from Shunsui constantly trying to invade her space.
"Yes he does," she said, calmly scrubbing shampoo into the girl's hair as she struggled.
"What's it like to have a brother?" Yachiru asked kicking Nanao in the shin as she tried to get away from the soap.
"It's nice," Nanao replied, dousing Yachiru's head in water. "You always have someone looking out for you and caring about you. Although you also always have someone teasing you if they're the older one."
"That's ok, I'd be the older one so it's fine," Yachiru said with a grin.
"Are you getting a sibling?" Nanao asked surprised enough to let the girl wiggle away.
"Maybe," Yachiru said going over to examine the dead fly.
"Kenpachi Taicho told you this?" Nanao asked trying to hide her own curiosity. It was a pretty well known fact that Kenpachi was too busy fighting to be getting serious with any women. Nanao just really couldn't imagine him trying to have a baby with someone, and if it was an accident Nanao wasn't sure Kenpachi would care about it at all.
"Uh huh," Yachiru said. "He said that if I tackled the right stork and got a baby I could keep it."
"What?" Nanao asked trying to follow.
"He said if I got the baby I could keep it," Yachiru said giving Nanao a look like she was clearly an idiot.
"If you tackle a stork?" Nanao repeated.
"Yeah, how else do you get a baby?" Yachiru asked calmly. "If you ask me it's really strange that the lady Pink Man's with could tackle any stork at all. If she could do it, I definitely can."
Nanao had trouble stifling her laughter as she realized Kenpachi must have told the child a slightly altered version of how the stork brings babies when Yachiru asked where they came from. "Maybe go easy on the storks," she advised. "They might be more liable to give you a baby brother or sister if you ask nicely."
"Pansy storks," Yachiru said stomping back over. "Let's go to the baths."
"Not till we get the mud out from under your nails," Nanao said with a stern look. Then she scooped the kid up and scrubbed her all over again.
Nanao lingered in the hot bath water for longer than she usually would. For one thing it made her entire body ache a little less and for another it seemed like the perfect way to wait out a rainstorm. If she was honest, she was kind of enjoying the fact that she didn't have normal working hours. She could do whatever she wanted whenever she wanted. If she chose to go out to the Rukongai in the evenings it wasn't a big deal. The Soutaicho had told her to do the job however she thought was best and frankly today she thought lounging in the baths was best.
Yachiru was also enjoying herself running around and jumping in and out of the warm bath water. She'd apparently had a toy box stored on the side and now the giant public bath was full of boats, pirate ships, and sea creatures. Given the pirate ships and the sea creatures were winning. Nanao briefly wondered how much of Kenpachi's paycheck went to re-supplying the girl with toy civilian boats for her to sink. Nanao had even obliged Yachiru the few times she asked for storm waves, sending pressurized kido under the water to make the ships bob dangerously up and down on the artificial waves.
When it was finally time to get out Nanao was seriously wondering if she could fit in a nap before she went to Hisagi's training session. She also was planning on getting him to go easy on her today if only not to destroy this beautiful clean relaxed feeling. Kuchiki had called off their shunpo lesson as well because of some family matter and Nanao couldn't be happier. One class to get through and then the weekend, which she fully intended on spending out in the Rukongai riding horses and helping Shin teach a medical kido class. She'd tried to get him to allow her to bring someone from the 4th to help, but he'd begged off saying one shinigami was bad enough.
"Come on," Nanao said impulsively. "Get your comb and I'll do your hair in braids if you like."
"Why?" Yachiru asked cocking her head as Nanao secured a towel around herself.
"You don't have to," Nanao said with a shrug. "I just always used to like it when people did my hair." By people she really meant Yadomaru Lisa, who used to take Nanao with her to the baths when she was younger. Lisa had been the first one to pin Nanao's hair up in different childish styles, and it had been one of the reasons Nanao had worn it up for years after she was gone. It was always just a small reminder of the woman, who besides being a hardened fighter, had small moments of pure human kindness.
"Fine," Yachiru said after a moment of thought. "But it better not look stupid."
"You can take it out if it does," Nanao said with a laugh as the little pink haired ball of energy went scampering off through the locker room.
Nanao sighed happily as she combed her own hair out, and started humming a raunchy ballad that Yadomaru used to sing. Not that she'd had any idea what it meant when she was a child. Shunsui had nearly laughed himself to death when she'd sung it at a private 8th memorial for Lisa a year after her disappearance. Despite not knowing what was so humorous she'd been happy to give him something to smile about on such a depressing day.
Nanao nearly screamed when the locker room door flew open and a big hulking figure entered the room accompanied by a crack of thunder. She was crouched and defensive with kido glowing around her before she'd even fully realized she'd moved.
"It's frigging pouring out there," Kenpachi complained while shaking off water like a big drenched dog.
"Kenpachi Taicho," Nanao said in surprise letting the kido burn out. The water had drenched his hair and instead of its normal spikes it hung long down his back, the sad little bells dangling precariously from the ends. "Er, you do know this is the women's baths right?"
"Course I know its the frigging women's bathroom," he said irritably. "What? You think I can't read?"
"No," Nanao placated quickly. "Just curious as to why you're here." She shifted uncomfortable and tried to jerk the too short towel down further over her legs before realizing all that did was expose more of her chest. Kami, this was uncomfortable.
"You two were taking too freaking long," he said in a matter of fact tone. "I had to talk to you and I've got other things to do."
"Me?" she asked raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, heard you nearly killed my 3rd seat this morning," he said with a shrug.
"Oh, well he started it," she said and then felt like slapping herself. What kind of defense was he started it?
"Yeah, yeah, still I'm supposed to deal with it apparently," Kenpachi grumbled. "The old man says too many people die in the 11th when we're not on duty and I'm supposed to do something about it."
"Well, he's not dead," Nanao pointed out.
"I guess I'm supposed to give out warnings or some such shit," Kenpachi said. "I say you can't survive your own squad you shouldn't be on the field. Although you were cheating with that kido bullshit."
"That effective kido bullshit," she said defensively. "Regardless of what I used, he still would have been dead."
"Whatever," Kenpachi growled sitting down on a bench and shrugging his captain's cloak off before dragging his sodden uniform top over his head and ringing it out. "Just don't kill anyone. I've got enough crap paperwork to go through without you adding to the pile."
"You do your own paperwork?" Nanao blurted shocked.
"Like I said, think I can't read?" he asked dangerously.
"No," Nanao said, "I just assumed you had your lower seats do it all."
"I'm not Kyouraku," Kenpachi said, and Nanao winced at the low blow.
"Ken-chan!" Yachiru shrieked rounding the corner with her brush in hand. "You have to see the big yacht boat you got for me. I destroyed it good. Bam almost in two!" The little girl shoved the comb into Nanao's hand and shot off around the corner again.
"Weren't you all in a mud fight?" Kenpachi asked looking after the child with a confused look.
"Yes, what about it?" Nanao asked.
"It's just that she's clean," he stated.
"Yeah," Nanao replied. "We are in the baths for that reason." Saying it again made her conscious all over of the fact that she was in a thin towel next to a shirtless man in the women's rooms.
Kenpachi gave her an annoyed look and said, "It generally takes a few baths and a few days for her to entirely get the mud off."
"Yeah, well you pretty much have to tackle her and strangle hold her down, but it can be done," she said with a laugh.
Kenpachi gave a grunt in return and looked in the direction the little girl had run off in and sighed. "Thanks," he grunted.
"It was nothing," Nanao said with a shrug.
"I'm not blind," he said glancing over at her. "She drives most people nuts."
"She's a little girl," Nanao said with a smile. "They all tend to do that. I'm sure I drove Yadomaru fukutaicho a little crazy with how much I liked to trail after her. I'd say the same about Kyouraku Taicho, but then again our maturity levels were much more on par when I was a child."
Kenpachi just grunted again and stood up glaring at his hair in a nearby mirror. Yachiru tore around the corner a moment later and held up her smashed up toy with pride. He took it from her and examined it closely before launching into a discussion on how the thing could have been better smashed to bits. Nanao watched them quietly and was surprised that she found the little scene sweet in its own morbid way. It was no wonder Yachiru adored her 'Ken-chan' with the undivided attention he provided her with. No candies to shut her up, just honest interested attention. It took her a moment to realize they were both staring at her.
"Hmm?" she asked.
"The fly killer lady was really spaced out," Yachiru commented with a giggle. "I asked if you could fix Ken-chan."
"Oh, um," Nanao stammered glancing at the man and trying to figure out what the girl was saying.
"It takes him forever to get it hard when he does it on his own," Yachiru said cutting off Kenpachi as he started to argue.
Nanao sat there in dumb shock trying desperately to process what the child was saying. "I don't know that-"
"He's always yelling like an animal by the end," Yachiru said. "Please?"
"I don't need her," Kenpachi said grumpily.
"Come on," Yachiru said grabbing his hand and dragging him over to where Nanao sat on the bench. "You said you'd do my hair, but Ken-chan's needs a lot more help."
Nanao sighed with relief, but quickly froze in surprise again when the little girl promptly forced the giant man to sit down on the ground in front of Nanao right between her legs. Nanao quickly slammed a hand down on the towel between her now parted thighs and could only thank kami that Kenpachi was faced the other way otherwise he'd have gotten an eyeful.
"You don't have to," the man growled grumpily from the floor.
"Er, it's fine," she said, scrambling quickly to her knees on the bench behind him. The towel fell down her legs and she sighed a bit in relief. He was so tall anyway that she needed to be higher on the bench.
"Here," Yachiru said, having retrieved a bottle of hair gel.
"Thanks," Nanao said dumbly, wondering how she managed to get herself into these kinds of situations. She nearly laughed though when she glanced down at the hulking man in front of her and clearly saw that he was sulking, his arms crossed over his still bare torso.
She smiled internally and suddenly decided to just go with the flow. Her fingers quickly worked through his hair pulling out the dangling little bells and placing them on the bench next to her for safekeeping. She was surprised to find his hair much softer and well cared for then she would have imagined. Yachiru had darted back off through the locker room to put the broken toy back and it was silent for a minute.
"You don't have to do this," he repeated.
"It's no problem," she said with a small laugh. "But won't the rain just ruin it again?"
"Yachiru keeps an umbrella in here," he said with a shrug. Her eyes were drawn down by the action and she stopped herself from asking where he'd picked up one particularly nasty looking scar. She dragged a brush through his wet locks and smiled as she heard Yachiru burst into an old song somewhere in the baths.
He showed her how to do one of his lower spikes. He had to correct her form a few times as she worked, once reaching up to physically adjust her hand and she jumped without meaning to.
"Don't like to be touched?" he asked.
"Not particularly," she said nonchalantly.
"How the hell'd you put up with Kyouraku?"
"He was," she paused to think about the right word and then said, "rather insistent."
Kenpachi snorted. "He as good a lay as the women like to screech about?"
She stopped in surprise for a moment and then blushed. "I don't really think that's any of your business."
"Didn't mean to piss you off," he said with a shrug. "Just curious what all the fuss is about."
"Why?" she asked feeling mean. "You interested?"
Kenpachi surprised her again by laughing outright at that. "I'd break him in two. Trust me when I say whatever he can do, I can do better."
"Is this the point where you ask me if I want to find out first hand?" Nanao asked in disgust.
He chuckled again. "You ain't really my type. All tiny, delicate, and proper. I like a girl that can handle a good spanking."
"You saying I can't?" she demanded offended before she could really think about what she was asking.
He smirked up at her in the mirror across from them and growled, "You saying you want to prove you can? It'd probably piss Kyouraku off which is what you're doing with all this training shit right?"
"I'm not doing this to piss him off," she said. "I know everyone thinks that, but I'm doing this for myself."
"Then I guess you're just coming on to me for fun?" he asked.
"I'm not coming on to you," she defended, but had finally heard the humor in his voice and let the subject drop. Yachiru came bounding back into the room and bounced up onto the bench next to Nanao.
"Can I hand you bells?" she asked.
"Sure," Nanao said accepting the first one from the little girl.
"Can we get ice cream later, Ken-chan?"
"Sure," he said with a shrug.
"Can hair lady come too?"
"Sure," he said with another uncaring shrug. "If she wants."
"Well?" Yachiru said expectantly.
Nanao glanced at the clock and was shocked at how late it had gotten. "Oh I would, but I have to meet Hisagi-san in a half hour. Rain check?" She placed the last bell on his tallest spike and smiled at her handiwork. It wasn't perfect, but it was passable.
"Yeah," Yachiru said, examining Kenpachi's hair. He stood up and frowned at his still sopping wet shirt. He ended up balling up the fabric and tugging just his white Taicho's haori back around his shoulders. "I'll get my umbrella," the little girl announced happily and bounced away once more.
"Sorry your hair isn't perfect," Nanao said for lack of anything better to say.
He shrugged and glanced at her again. "You know, you ain't half bad for an 8th woman," he said after a moment of contemplation.
"Thanks I suppose," she said, once more not sure how to react.
"And not a half bad pair of stems either," he said with a lurid grin as he swept his eyes over her towel clad form again.
Nanao blushed and was about to tell him off as Yachiru sprung back around the corner with a bright pink polka dot umbrella. Nanao bit her tongue and stopped herself from dropping a nasty word or two, not that Yachiru probably hadn't heard it before, but simply to maintain some professionalism.
"See you later, hair lady," Yachiru said joyfully as she scrambled up onto Kenpachi's back. Nanao had to stifle a laugh as the little girl held the childish umbrella over herself and the hulking man's head.
"Bye," Nanao called as the exited the baths. She shook her head at the insanity that was her life and changed quickly, wondering how she was going to make it to the 9th without getting soaked all over again. At least the rain was letting up some, maybe with shunpo she'd just be mildly damp.
A/N: This chapter was just super fun to write. Fair warning that I might not be able to get out a chapter this coming week as I am moving and my computer has to go into the shop. The return button busted and it makes writing somewhat difficult :(
Anyhoo, hopefully they won't have my computer for too long and I can still get something out. Also thanks for all the b-day wishes! Review please!