She lay on the ground and watched the rain pound against the windows of the darkened practice room. The storm had died down for about an hour, just enough for her to make it to the 9th, and then raged back into full force in the middle of her training session.
"Now," Hisagi announced next to her, and right on cue a bolt of lightning ripped through the air and illuminated the room. Nanao smiled and was glad she'd talked him out of a hard training session. Not that it'd been particularly difficult. He was pretty happy not to spend his lunch break training too.
"You should put that on your list of skills when you're up for a raise," she said. "Can always tell when a lightning strike is coming, even with eyes closed."
Hisagi lifted the arm off his face and blinked his eyes open. "I know, right?" he said with a grin. "It is a highly useful talent."
"I'm sure it's saved many a life," Nanao said mock seriously.
"You have no idea," he answered. "Old ladies and children everywhere rest easier at night knowing I have this particular skill."
"I've heard rumors that it's why they made you a fukutaicho originally," Nanao said conspiratorially.
"Yes, I demonstrated my unique talent on the field while blindfolded and they simply had to promote me up through the ranks," he answered gravely.
"The Gotei 13 is the better for it," she replied trying not to crack a smile as she pushed herself up into a sitting position.
"You're bleeding," he said suddenly, breaking their joking banter.
Nanao glanced down at herself and saw that she was indeed bleeding from a cut at the top of her wrist. "Damn, must have reopened," she commented glaring at the offending injury. She'd gotten it from brushing too close to a window ledge she'd misjudged during one of her shunpo training sessions and had thought it was healed up by now. She stood up and walked over to her bag looking for the bandages she now kept on hand.
"Since when did kido healing become illegal?" Hisagi asked. He was lucky that his question was not accompanied by a condescending tone.
"It didn't," she said with a shrug as she found the bandages. "The Yakuza just don't use it on smaller injuries so I'm trying to get used to it. Used to be, I'd get a paper cut and Kyouraku Taicho would tie me up and drag me to the 4th."
"Do what you like," Hisagi said walking over to her and grabbing her hand to look at her wrist more closely. "But I doubt healing one little bleeder will get you in too much trouble."
"You start that it never stops," she stated, uncomfortably aware of his warm hands on her skin.
"True enough, I suppose," he said letting the hand go. Nanao tried hard not to miss the warmth. She quickly smeared some coagulate powder on the wound and ignored the sting as she focused on wrapping it again. "Do you want to get dinner tonight?"
Nanao's head snapped up in surprise, and she looked over at him to make sure he'd actually asked the question. He stood calmly awaiting an answer, and Nanao felt nervous suddenly. It wasn't that the offer was a bad one. She'd enjoy getting dinner with him, but as much as it'd gotten easier over the passing days, it still just felt strange and vaguely wrong. Saying yes would mean the end, well and truly on her part at least, and she was horrified to realize that some part of her had been clinging to the fact that this was all just some bad bump in the road and that someday she'd be able to crawl back into Shunsui's arms.
"Just as friends," Hisagi threw out anxiously as he watched her face, which to him had gone stone cold. Kyouraku would have known it to be how she covered up internal conflicts, but all it did for Hisagi was make him think he'd stepped dangerously over a line. "I know it's still too soon, but I do like spending time with you."
Nanao felt the relief flood her and shoved the feeling to the back of her mind to analyze at a later time. "Sure, I guess," she said feeling her heartbeat return to normal. "I don't have any plans tonight."
"Perfect," he said with a smile. "Meet me at 8 around the South gate and we can decide from there?"
"Sounds good," she said simply.
"Did you want to do anymore swordplay today?" he asked switching the subject almost as if he feared she'd suddenly change her mind.
"Sure," she said with a shrug. "Let's just go easy if you don't mind?"
"No problem," he said with a laugh. "Although we should probably start with our shikais soon enough."
Nanao flinched and said maybe hoping she could get around it. She didn't want anyone having too much experience with her shikai if she could help it. It'd bring up all sorts of questions she wasn't prepared to answer. Besides as far as physical swordplay went her shikai wasn't going to help her at all.
The next half hour was spent on halfhearted training and Nanao was more than happy to head home in the lessening rain. Boo greeted her at the door and she crawled into bed mid afternoon to take a nap. As she drifted off to sleep she couldn't help wondering what Shunsui would say if he found her napping in the middle of the day. Probably something about how proud he was that he'd done a good job training her after all. She snorted at the thought and snuggled down further thinking Kyouraku was probably doing the same on his office couch or in his own home.
They hadn't replaced her as a fukutaicho yet, so he probably didn't even bother to go in to work. Not that she'd heard the 8th had suddenly fallen into any more chaos than normal. In fact Rangiku said it seemed the 8th was even turning in its paperwork in a somewhat timely fashion. Perhaps one result of the breakup was that they flipped personalities, she mused. Nanao didn't know whether to laugh or be pissed that he could have done way more to help her all those years. Not that she hadn't been aware that he was capable, she just never thought she'd see the day were that capability was actually put into action. It was raining today though, so regardless he probably was sleeping. Shunsui never missed a good nap during a rainstorm. Nanao had even been badgered into joining him for a few of those naps over the past year and a half. She smiled sleepily and allowed herself to drift off.
Nanao woke up with a start a couple hours later trying to identify where she was. Her beating heart slowed down as she realized she was in her own room and the rain had let up although it was still cloudy and dark outside her window. She sat up in bed feeling sticky from sweat and assumed she must have had a bad dream that was already forgotten. Sighing, she kicked her legs off the bed and stretched as she got to her feet. Boo gave a disgruntled noise at all the jostling and stood up to re-circle his place in her blankets and then, with a one eyed glare in her direction, settled down to sleep again. Nanao just laughed and glanced at her clock realizing she had two hours to kill before her date, er dinner, with Hisagi.
She padded around her apartment reading a few pages from her book and drinking some tea before finally deciding to hop in the shower and get ready for the evening. Without Matsumoto there to encourage her she picked an outfit far less daring, but still more fun that her usual uniform. She glanced in the mirror and made a face growing more and more uncomfortable as the time crept closer.
It wasn't that she didn't like Hisagi, it was just that this felt much like the feeling she used to get on all those forced blind dates Matsumoto set her up on. She'd kind of been hoping that after going out with Shunsui for a while she'd gotten better at the whole dating game, but frankly there was none of the warmth and easy excitement that she was used to feeling when planning on meeting up with Shunsui. Right now she just felt clammy and anxious and was pretty sure she was going to say something vastly inappropriate just due to nerves. It was a bad habit with her.
She'd once told a man about a study the 12th had been doing on male genitalia size in comparison to the length of one's zanpaktou, which sort of operated on a big hands, big feet, big zanpaktou concept, as an opening conversation on a blind date. She hadn't realized at the time that much like her, the man had had a tanto as a zanpaktou. It'd been a short-lived dinner and Kyouraku had appeared the second the man was gone laughing hard as he'd apparently been in the next booth over spying and eavesdropping on her the whole time. She'd spent the rest of the evening with her Taicho discussing the newest batch of studies the 12th had released and couldn't even remember her would-be date's name anymore. Kyouraku had been the one who had ended up walking her home that night and had picked her up to go to brunch the next day. Oh well, no time to dwell on the past, now or never, she told herself firmly.
Walking out the door she glanced up at the sky and wondered if the rain really wasn't done and if she should go back for an umbrella. Shrugging she finally decided to risk it. She made it to the South Gate with five minutes to spare and couldn't help smiling at her own improved shunpo and the fact that it hadn't winded her in the least. Maybe tonight wouldn't be so bad after all. She leaned against the wall and waited for Hisagi to show.
"Thank god it's the weekend," she heard as two shinigami neared the gate.
"Yeah, it was nice to get out early too," one of the men said nodding.
His friend laughed and said, "Well what do you expect when we're scheduled to have cross divisional training with the 13th? I swear to kami their Taicho is sick more than he's healthy, and the whole division falls apart when he is because they don't have a fukutaicho, and his third seats are nuts."
"Guess we're lucky he came down with something today," the other man replied with a shrug. "We should probably enjoy it while we can. Once the Taicho dies they'll probably replace him with some hard ass who'll make cross divisional training hell, like when we have to work with the 2nd."
Nanao had felt the color drain from her face about five seconds into their conversation and she stepped into the path of the oncoming shinigami. "Excuse me," she said feeling ill. "Are you both talking about Ukitake Taicho? Is he sick again?"
"Yeah our training was canceled because of it," one man said with a shrug.
"He's in the 4th?" she asked absentmindedly, but the answer hardly mattered as she'd already begun searching for them with her reiatsu. Both Jyuushiro and Shunsui were in the 4th, and while Jyuushiro's reiatsu was weak, Shunsui's was jumping all over like an agitated bull. She didn't even hear the shinigamis' response before she was bolting headlong for the 4th.
She threw the doors open when she got there and got a few questioning looks, which quickly went away as healers recognized her. It was a well known fact that if she, Shunsui, or Jyuushiro were in the 4th the other two were closely in tow. She scanned the area again and quickly made a beeline for Shunsui. He was pacing around the waiting room looking white against the black of his uniform. His hat and pink haori were entirely missing and his white Taicho haori hung over the edge of a bench stained down the side with drying blood.
"Shunsui," she said and could hear the terror in her own tone, which she'd been unable to mask. Jyuushiro's reiatsu was weak even from this close proximity and it frightened her badly.
His head snapped around and his anxious eyes found her at the doorway. Before she could even think about it she'd thrown herself in his arms and he was returning the hug just as ferociously. "What happened?" she mumbled into his chest.
"He had to run some paperwork around the Seireitei today and got caught in the second rain burst," Shunsui explained clinging to her, and his own desperation swirled around her in the thick reiatsu he just couldn't currently control. "He stopped by the 8th last and thank kami I was there, I made him stay, but the running and the chill just did him in this time. He was doing ok and after the tea I thought everything was going to be alright and then, it just wasn't."
"What's Unohana Taicho have to say?" she asked trying to be the logical unemotional one, although she never quite succeeded in being that person when it was Shunsui or Jyuushiro who was hurt. She'd often seen that as a flaw in herself. Lisa had always been cool and collected even when those closest to her were lying prone in the 4th.
"I haven't seen her since they took him in, and no one seems to know anything!" he said, yelling the last part at a passing healer. The little man gave a strangled squeak and scampered off down the hall fleeing Kyouraku's reiatsu.
"Knock it off," she commanded letting her old fukutaicho self take over. "You're going to mess up the healing spells throwing that kind of reiatsu around and then you'll be kicked out. Come on." She grabbed his hand and made him sit down next to her, careful to sit then on the bench side farthest away from the bloodied haori. Shunsui looked miserable, but made a visible effort to get his reiatsu back under control. "We'll wait, just like always. Jyuushiro-san's pulled through a hundred times before. He will again."
"You didn't see him, Nanao," Shunsui replied gloomily. "It was bad."
"I'm going to see what I can find out," she said standing up, but was quickly stopped when he didn't release his hold on her hand.
"They don't know anything," he said sounding like a hurt child. "Stay. Please."
"Of course," she said with a nod, settling down next to him again. She remembered the first time Jyuushiro had gotten sick after Lisa left. She'd been at a loss on what to do for her Taicho and had ended up simply crawling into his lap and eventually falling asleep there. It was always in these moments that Shunsui was at his weakest, and she leaned into his side if only to let him know she was still there and always would be. They sat in silence for a half hour watching 4th division members come and go, and Nanao wondered vaguely if she shouldn't try to track someone down with answers now. It was taking an awfully long time.
"He needs a fukutaicho," Shunsui said out of the blue.
"What?" Nanao asked.
"Jyuu, he needs a fukutaicho," Shunsui said. "He shouldn't have been running those papers around in the rain and his third seats are too scatterbrained to do much of it."
"Speaking of them, where are they?" Nanao glanced around as if they'd suddenly pop up.
"I ordered them back to run the damn division," he said angrily. "I know it wasn't their faults, but I just couldn't stand to have them here."
Nanao took a deep breath and unconsciously used her thumb to run soft circles over his palm where they still held on to each other. "You should apologize after this is all over," she said softly. "You know they love him too."
Shunsui shifted unhappily, all of his body just as tense as when she'd come in, but he didn't deny it. "He's been waiting for Kuchiki to let Rukia-chan take the position. That or he would have taken you. All of this could have been avoided." She gave him a sharp look and he clarified, "I'm not blaming you for not taking the job. It isn't your responsibility, he just needs to stop being so damn picky and get a fukutaicho."
"Lie down," she said suddenly. He gave her a quizzical look and she repeated herself. Finally he shrugged and stretched out on the bench putting his head in her lap. Her skillful fingers started running through his hair and rubbing his head. It was an action she'd learned long ago tended to sooth him when he worked himself into a tizzy. She'd often used it as a tactic when he got sick or wounded, but like a child didn't want to stay in bed. "You aren't any use to anyone all worked up," she stated calmly. "What happened can't be undone. We'll just wait until Jyuushiro is better, and then you will take him on an ill-advised drinking trip like always and both Unohana Taicho and I will scold you both like always."
Shunsui snorted and she was glad she'd gotten at least that much humor out of him. After a moment he said quietly, "I can't lose you both."
Her fingers stopped moving momentarily and then she continued. "You aren't losing either one of us," she said softly. "Jyuushiro-san is going to get better and the two of you will be up to your old antics in no time, and as for me, well I'm not going anywhere. I'm still right here."
"It's not the same," he said simply, which was the honest truth and she didn't deny. "Maybe you could talk to Kuchiki? You've been training with him, right?"
"I can," she said thinking about it. "I don't think my words carry too much weight with him, but I could try. Rukia-san really would be a good fukutaicho given the opportunity, although he might prefer her in the 8th."
"Why's that?" Shunsui asked surprised. "Kuchiki doesn't have any fondness for me."
Nanao laughed lightly. "No, but he knows what the 8th's fukutaicho position means. It's a lot of deskwork and very little danger. The 13th's on the other hand is almost like occasionally taking on a co-Taichoship. He wants Rukia safe at the end of the day so the 8th would be a good compromise. She'd get all of the prestige with none of the danger."
"Was I that awful?" he asked sounding tired.
"You were never awful," she answered honestly. "It was what it was, and it worked for the time. Not wanting your subordinates to get hurt or be unhappy isn't something to be ashamed of."
"But you left," he said.
"I had to," she said quietly. "And we both know it didn't have anything to do with the position, but I am happy now. I miss the 8th more than I probably should, but kami Shunsui it feels good to be doing something more. I like the training, and I like the Rukongai, and I like not worrying about the stupid interdivisional training schedule."
"You don't feel trapped anymore," he supplied haltingly. "Like I felt when I first got away from my family."
She gave a good hard yank on his hair and he gave a little grunt of pain. "Listen to me right now," she said angrily. "I never felt trapped. If I hadn't been happy I would have left. I didn't say this was better it's just different. Yes, you were smothering at times, well actually you were smothering often, but you were never your family and you aren't your father or your brother."
"I kept making you do what I thought was best for you," he said miserably, and she realized he must have been brooding about this since their last fight. "Just like they did to me."
"Excuse me," she said frostily. "Making me? Ha. You couldn't make me do anything I didn't want to do. Cajole and annoy into doing it yes, but make me, no way. You aren't your family. You always did what you thought would best keep me happy and safe. Your family always did what was best for them not for you. If you insist on continuing this idiotic train of thought I'm going to have to show you just how little you could have forced me to do anything. You may be a Taicho, but I wouldn't go down without a fight."
"I could never fight my Nanao-chan," he said with a sigh, rolling over to hug around her waist and bury his face in her stomach.
"You aren't them," she said softly, trailing a finger over his temple, and knowing the fear of turning into your parents only too well. "And Jyuushiro and I aren't going anywhere."
"I love you," he murmured against her and she felt the words rumble through her skin.
"I love you too," she replied easily. "That's never been in question." They stayed like that content in the silence for quite some time.
"Kyouraku-san, Ise-san," Unohana greeted tiredly as she stepped into the waiting room. If she was surprised to see them together she didn't show it. She'd probably seen grief bring all sorts of people together over the years.
"How is he?" Shunsui asked sitting up at attention instantly.
"Weak, but alive," Unohana said. "It seems he had a little virus brewing for the past week or so and then the chill and the running just set it off. We have him in stable condition right now, and if he makes it until morning, which is likely, he should recover as much as he can. Your preemptive stabilizing spells while you got him here probably saved his life."
"They're not as good as Nanao's," he said shaking his head and feeling useless.
"They were good enough," Unohana said kindly. "We've put him in his usual room with the extra bed if you'd like to stay. We'll be keeping a close eye on him throughout the night though, so it's really unnecessary."
"I'll stay," Shunsui said, which they'd all already known.
"As you wish," Unohana said. "Do you need me to?"
"No, I know the way," he said gloomily.
"I'll be checking in personally in an hour or so," Unohana said with a quick nod. "If you'll excuse me."
They both said their thanks and stood up. Nanao quickly balled up his Haori so the blood wasn't showing and followed after him as he led down the hall.
"You don't have to stay," he said quietly, and Nanao knew that with every fiber of his being he didn't want her to leave. He always did decide to use social niceties and formalities at the strangest points in time.
"I want to," she said simply, which was the truth. He simply nodded and they both stepped into the room to see Jyuushiro hooked up to monitoring machines and breathing tubes. Nanao pressed closer to Shunsui's side as they both paused a moment and then stepped away to deposit her soiled bundle on the most uncomfortable chair in the room which neither of them liked to use. "I'm going to get some water and food from the mess hall. Do you want anything?" she asked, knowing she should give the two some time alone even if Jyuushiro wasn't conscious.
"Not hungry," he answered standing forlornly next to his best friend's bed.
"I'll be back in a minute," she said and walked out. She'd pick some food up for him all the same and force him to eat it later. Once he was satisfied that Jyuushiro wasn't just going to drop dead he usually got his hunger back and by then the mess hall would be closed.
She took her time and found a willing 4th division member to pass along Ukitake's status to his division and third seats. She couldn't entirely blame Shunsui for not wanting them there. They both had good sweet hearts, but were occasionally too much to handle. Besides it was against 4th rules to let anyone stay after visiting hours. Unohana only gave Ukitake and Kyouraku the special privilege and Nanao had merely received it as a side thought, and even she wasn't always allowed to stay like the two of them were. She made her way back to the room carrying a tray of food that would keep though the night and two hot mugs of tea. It wasn't the best food ever, but it would do.
Shunsui was sitting next to the unconscious man when she entered the room, and Nanao nodded to him quietly putting the tray down on the small little table. She grabbed the extra tea and pushed it into his hands.
"He seems to be breathing ok," Shunsui said worriedly as he watched his best friend's chest rise and fall.
"Yeah," Nanao agreed, having been here enough times to know that while the breathing was weak it wasn't labored like it so often was. "I'm sure he'll be alright. Have his siblings been contacted?"
"Yes," Shunsui replied leaning back and popping his back. "But Yuki-chan-chan went into labor a few hours ago. I told them to stay with her, that he'd pull through. He so wanted to be there too."
"He'll see the baby when it's less red and wrinkly," Nanao said with a comforting laugh. "They'll more than likely have a family reunion out at the Ugendo estate. I'm sure you'll have one more child yelling for Uncle Shunsui in no time."
"One day he's not going to get better," Shunsui said ignoring her attempts to raise his mood while morosely looking down at his friend. Nanao didn't argue, as it was a simple fact of life.
"But not today," she finally said softly, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder and letting him cover it with his own for a moment before finally taking up the other chair in the room. They sat quietly in the room for another half hour or so, and Nanao was almost dozing off when he spoke again.
"You look nice," he commented, and she realized he'd been looking at her over the bed. "Were you going out to the Rukongai?"
"Thanks," she said instinctively glancing down at herself. Seeing the skirt and the cute top suddenly jogged her memory. "Shit."
"What?" he asked with a bit of panic, looking at Jyuushiro as if trying to identify what she had seen.
"No nothing, I just totally forgot I was supposed to meet someone," she said. "I heard about Jyuushiro-san and I rushed right over without thinking. Too late to do anything about it now."
Shunsui grunted his understanding and then a few minutes later couldn't help himself. "Was it a date?"
"It was dinner with a friend," she said firmly.
"Hisagi, Kuchiki, or Kenpachi?" Shunsui asked in a dull tone.
"Hisagi," she said evenly. "What would Kuchiki-san or Kenpachi Taicho want to do with me?"
"Heard Kuchiki was out front of the 8th feeling you up pretty well and half the Seireitei thinks you and Kenpachi had sex in the women's baths this morning," he said with a shrug trying to act like he didn't care. "Heard about it after lunch."
"Everyone needs to mind their own damn business," Nanao growled. "Kuchiki-san is just helping me with my shunpo, not feeling me up, and Kenpachi Taicho just came to collect Yachiru-chan."
"You can go apologize to Hisagi now if you like," Shunsui said. "I'm sure he'll forgive you when you explain."
"Stop being a child. I'm not going anywhere," she said decisively. "And he will forgive me whenever I tell him or else he's a waste of time and not a very good friend at all."
"I don't think he's so worried about being your friend," Shunsui grumbled.
"Just because a man talks to me doesn't automatically mean he's trying to get into my hakamas," Nanao said rolling her eyes.
"Not automatically no," Shunsui agreed folding his arms across his chest. "But Hisagi is trying to get into your hakamas, and that's just a fact."
"I don't need to defend myself or him to you," Nanao said with a sigh.
"No, you don't," he agreed sadly. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat and glanced back at Jyuushiro. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked. Forget it. Thank you for coming despite your plans."
"Always," she said simply. "Family comes first."
"I'm just not good at being helpless," Shunsui said morosely and Nanao wasn't sure if he was referencing Jyuushiro's illness or her dating. It was probably a bit of both.
"I know," she agreed quietly. "I understand the feeling."
After a few moments of silence Shunsui finally asked, "Want to play a game of Go?"
She agreed if only to escape the awkwardness. It was one thing when they were both terrified for Jyuushiro, it pushed everything to the back, but when they were just waiting for him to wake up everything started bubbling up again. What she hated most of all was that she was somewhat glad for the excuse to be with them both, and she knew that was a sick thought to have when one of the most important people in her life was lying in a hospital bed.
A/N: Did you guys miss me? Glad you all like the last chapter at least! Sorry for the long delay. Moving was nuts and then my mom was in town visiting. As much as I love fanfiction, moms always come first :)
Hope you enjoyed it!