Chapter 11

"We're selling the house" Greg declared, as they lay in Mycroft's bed. "Elaine is moving in with Robert and, well we didn't actually say it out loud, but I guess we're getting divorced as well." It was the first time he'd said the words out loud. And even though there was no place he'd rather be than right here in Mycroft's arms, it felt weird. He would be divorced. He would no longer be somebody's husband.

"Are you okay?" Mycroft asked him in a soft voice. Greg was silent for a while, then he turned to face Mycroft and broke into a big smile. "I really really am." he said, truly meaning it. "We should have done this years ago really, but better late than ever I guess. It will be nice having my own place too, closer to work."

"Your own place? You're getting a flat of your own?" Mycroft asked.

"Yeah, that was the plan." Greg answered.

"Oh Greg" Mycroft sighed, suddenly sitting up.

"What? What's up?" Greg asked, rising his head so it rested on his palm.

"Have I ever called you an idiot?" Mycroft asked, voice stone cold.

"Uhm, no." Greg answered, a bit surprised.

"Then it's about time. You're an idiot. You're a complete and utter idiot if you think for one second that I would let you buy a flat and not move in with me." he said this very slowly, as if speaking to a child. Greg just stared at him, unable to believe what he'd just heard.

"I…" he started, and swallowed. "I didn't think you wanted me here all the time. Wouldn't I just be in the way?"

Mycroft sighed again and this time he actually rolled his eyes. "Greg, how many times have I called you an idiot?"

"Well, one so far. But I have a feeling I'm about to hear it a second time." Greg said, and he couldn't help a small smile.

"You're damn right. You're an idiot. How can you possibly think that I wouldn't want you here? If it were up to me, you would never leave this house. I miss you every time you walk out the door, and it doesn't feel right until you're back again." he said this very casually, but Greg knew he meant it, and he was surprised.

"But… you always say how boring people are, and how you can't stand being around them for too long." he said, remembering how many times Mycroft had complained about how he was living in a world of goldfish.

"And you thought I meant you?" Mycroft asked.

"Well, yes."

"Then you're an even bigger idiot than I thought." Mycroft concluded.

"So I've heard." Greg said, not able to keep the grin of his face. "Okay then...roommates?" he asked, stretching his hand towards Mycroft to shake.

"Definitely" Mycroft answered, and were pulled back down into bed by Greg's hand.

Three weeks later Greg and Elaine stood outside the house, the "sold"-sign in front of them, swinging back and forth in the wind. They stood there for a long time, not speaking, each of them lost in their own thoughts. Greg looked at the big green lawn and remembered their plans to put up a swing set and a basketball-hoop, possibly an inflatable pool in the summers. He looked at the outdoor furniture and the grill, purchased with the idea of barbeques with the neighbors while their in-laws played with their grand-children. He looked at the small wood-storage he'd built their first summer in the house, with racks for outdoor toys and bicycles that had instead become a house for spiders and bugs after years of empiness.

Greg swallowed. It was safe to say that their life hadn't turned out the way they had hoped. All of their plans and dreams for the future had been put on hold while awaiting kids. And then the years had gone by, and suddenly it was too late for them. Too late to save what they once had. He turned his head to look at Elaine and saw that she was crying. Silent tears streamed down her face and at that moment Greg felt an immense warmth towards her. He took her hand and she smiled weakly. "What went wrong with us, Greg?" she said quietly. He was silent for a minute, then said simply "Everything." He pulled her to the door. "Come on. We should start packing".

They worked all day, packing up their life together in brown boxes. The cold feeling between them was long gone and now they were resembling the good friends they had once been, before they had started dating. They joked about their ugly curtains, and took turns throwing platters, that they'd received as a wedding gift and that they both hated, on the floor so that the shards flew. That was fun until Elaine got a shard stuck under her shoe.

They watched old photos and divided books and movies between them. At nine o'clock they ordered pizza and Elaine found an old bottle of wine, that they'd decided to save for their 30th anniversary, but seeing as that day now wouldn't come, they opened it. They sat on the kitchen-floor, wine-bottle almost empty and the pizza all gone. After a while Elaine said "I wish it were different. We could have been so great together, and instead we just let it slip. We ruined us."

"I know" Greg said, leaning his head against a counter. "I know".

"We did love each other though, didn't we?" she asked.

"Of course we did" Greg answered, looking at her.

"Then we were lucky. That's more than some people get in a lifetime"

He nodded. She was somehow much closer now. So very close, and she smelled vanilla and her eyes were gleaming and they were kissing. Desperately kissing and tearing at each other's clothes and it was so very familiar. It was twenty years ago and they kissed for the first time. It was their wedding and they sealed their vows with a kiss. It was their honeymoon and they kissed under the stars. It was their whole life together, the pain and the sorrow and all the good times they'd had. But she felt too short. And Greg's hand tangled in her hair and he suddenly missed Mycroft short soft hair and, shit shit shit. Greg withdrew from Elaine quickly. It had gone from familiar and nice to horribly wrong in a second. Greg shook his head "We can't" he said.

"I know. I know, it was stupid." she agreed and at that moment her phone rang and she walked out of the kitchen to answer it. Greg remained on the floor, his head in his hands, feeling terrible. He wasn't sure it was considered cheating if you kissed your own wife, but nevertheless, he'd kissed someone other than Mycroft.

Elaine came back in the kitchen. "Uhm, it was Robert. He's picking me up, and he's here in a few seconds. Is it okay? You look like you could use some sleep anyway."

"Yeah, it's fine. I'll just throw this out and head home."

She nodded. "Okay, I'll come back tomorrow to pick up my stuff. Let's just keep in touch, yeah?"

She left, but came back a second later. "Oh and Greg? Don't beat yourself up for this" she gestured between them both "it never happened, okay?"

She left Greg on the kitchen-floor. He felt weird. But he was sure of something now, he really loved Mycroft.

Some time later that night, Greg sat in Mycroft's kitchen, Mycroft standing in front of him. Greg had told him about the kiss, he had to. He didn't want to start this with lies. Besides, he was pretty sure Mycroft would find out one way or another, so he figured it was best if he heard it from him. Mycroft had been silent for a long time now, and Greg started to freak out, wondering if he'd messed it all up. Eventually Mycroft said:

"Was it only a kiss?"

"Yes."

"Will it happen again?"

"Of course not"

"Then I see no point in dwelling on it any further. You're mine now, and I'm going to spend every day trying to prove how much I love you." Neither of them had said it before.

"You… you love me?" Greg asked.

"Of course I do. Do I need to call you an idiot again?"

Greg shook his head and smiled, then pulled Mycroft to him. "I love you too, you silly silly man."