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This makes no money.
Copyright infringement is
last thing on my mind.
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AN:
I'm having a ball
writing these crazy haikus.
Thank you for reading.
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Season 4 in Haiku
4.01 Scarlet Ribbons
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RINSE AND REPEAT
Worst take back ever
We (and Lisbon) think deed's done.
Nope. Back to the hunt.
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CRAZY BITCH
Carter's wife deserved
freaking Oscar, pretending
To be bereaved spouse.
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4.02 Little Red Book
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ERROR MESSAGE
Bertram decrees that
Jane will work without Lisbon?
"No, I don't think so."
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SHORT STICK
Eventually
Tork will get Jane back for this.
Nearly gets him killed.
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4.03 Pretty Red Balloon
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PAST
Jane sees reflection
of his former self in Glass.
Feels shame and regret.
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PRESENT
Lisbon lends support.
Jane confesses to client.
Gets absolution.
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FUTURE
Jane thinks love is strange.
Then thinks about a sandwich.
Is proposal next?
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4.04 Ring Around the Rosie
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IMPROVISATION
Jane's Texas accent
Trumps Wainwright's naivety.
Sax soothes Teresa.
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ET BAZINGA
Sheldon Cooper and
Patrick Jane prefer same couch
spot. Coincidence?
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4.05 Blood and Sand
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NO MAN IS AN ISLAND
Teresa's grumpy.
Jane enjoys nature's beauty.
These are good old days.
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4.06 Where in the World is Carmine O'Brien
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ALIENATED
Grown up Elliott
disrupts Reece's peace of mind.
Lisbon should phone home.
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STORING INFORMATION
Jane's adorable
letting Lisbon vent. But it's
a family affair.
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4.07 Blinking Red Light
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WHAT A WONDERFUL WORLD
Jane manipulates
Wainwright. Karen Cross. Panzer.
And finally, Red John.
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CASE OF THE NEAT MEDICINE CABINET
Advice to bad guys:
If Patrick Jane asks to use
your restroom, say "No."
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LENS OF SACRIFICE
Blinking Red Light sees
Jane expose his own secret
to stop more killing.
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4.08 Pink Tops
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GUM SHOELESS
Jane is in rare form.
Uncovers cop on the take
While in his sock feet.
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FELINE VIBE
Not many people
Could make Cho cry like baby
Meet Summer Edgecomb.
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4.09 The Redshirt
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TRICK PLAY
Jane gets confession
By talking to "dead" athlete.
Assist from ear mic.
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HARD EARNED WISDOM
"The truth hurts. I know."
"When you're dead, you're dead. Until
then, there is ice cream."
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4.10 Fugue in Red
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QUITE MEMORABLE
Sleeping together?
Yes, they are working toward it.
Can't miss anything.
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JANE'S ACRONYM
I Left On Vest, Else
"T's" Eyes Red. Eyes Say All Love
Is Safe Bet, On Norm.
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4.11 Always Bet on Red
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CHASING MONSTERS
Guilt ridden father
kills himself. Jane's quest - better
coping strategy?
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4.12 My Bloody Valentine
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BS
Grace wanders woods with
a surly hooker. Saved by
Spirit Craig? Oh, please.
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4.13 Red is the New Black
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DUMBO
Darcy's back on case.
Wainwright's in over his head.
Feather solves the case.
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4.14 At First Blush
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A GOOD MAN
Eve was innocent.
Decided once and for all.
Jane's good deed proves it.
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THE WHINE WITH MY CHEESE
Kimball and Summer.
Hot elevator lovin'.
Not Jane and Lisbon?
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4.15 War of the Roses
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THIS WILL BITE YOU IN THE ASS
Rascal Jane mostly
likes making Lisbon jealous.
Why does he do that?
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4.16 His Thoughts Were Red Thoughts
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TURN STILES
Creepy drones abound.
Jane's elegant plan puts Brett
in debt to Patrick.
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4.17 Cheap Burgundy
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DARCY SHOULD HAVE READ SOME SHAKESPEARE
The fool doth think he
is wise, but the wise man knows
himself to be fool.
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SO MARRIED
"I need your help." "I
have to go, Jane needs me." "I
missed you." "Missed you too."
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4.18 Ruddy Cheeks
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WHO WEARS HEMP?
Tygers. Stinky Tea.
Jane smokes out gold digger wife.
Catches toxic nurse.
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4.19 Pink Champagne on Ice
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JACK'S BOX
Lisbon popping out
of box made this episode
Totally worth it.
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4.20 Something's Rotten in Redmund
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PATRICK JANE TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE
Petty tyrant pegged
by Jane's bathroom graffiti.
That pervy perv perv!
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THERE IS METHOD IN MY MADNESS
Jane knew, because marm
was meaner to lover. Like
Lisbon is to him.
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TEARS
"Yeah, he is gorgeous."
This scene made last White Orchids
scene much more poignant.
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4.21 Ruby Slippers
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WHY, OH WHY CAN'T I
"Dead" kid reborn as
person he wanted to be.
Maybe Jane can too.
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4.22 So Long, and Thanks for All the Red Snapper
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"THE" TERESA LISBON?
The one and only!
Jane's a kid in candy store.
Lisbon's past revealed.
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CABIN BY THE POND AWAITS YOU
Lisbon's not wistful.
Intense and particular's
just Patrick Jane's type.
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4.23 Red Rover, Red Rover
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I WILL HURT YOU BADLY
Jane threatens Wainwright.
There's simply nothing hotter
than Protective Jane.
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HARD CHOICES
As Jane drinks himself
Into stupor, he knows what
he has to do next.
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BE HONEST, NOW
Can anyone say
that you didn't enjoy Jane
telling off Wainwright?
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4.24 Crimson Hat
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KIND GREEN EYES
Alone at night in
seedy Vegas hotel room.
What did Jane think of?
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THAT THING HE SAID
During moment of
crisis, Jane's defenses fall.
And the truth slips out.
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ALMOST
Darcy sure likes to
visit the morgue. Her clumsy
meddling ruins Jane's plan.
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WAIT, YOU LEFT THAT LAST PART OUT
He contacted me.
He sent me a message and
I screwed her brains out.
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I hope you enjoyed
This version of Season Four
Season five is next.