I have uploaded the sequel to this story "Romance, Love and Desire". It is the continuation of this story line with many more lemons and a lot more fun :) Well not all fun I guess we forgot Victoria…..anyway I hope to still make it fun. I would like to thank Rebeccap, ECISLove2010, shannoninn369, Nena1981, elaine67,tracybuie and nicolleio for their lovely reviews! You are the ones that keep my spirits up and encourage me to write more! Hope you like the new story too.

Bella's POV

I walked slowly towards the car park. I could see the Volvo clearly. Edward was leaning against the steering wheel with his head in his hands. I knew this gesture he had been in this exact same position when he had first wet his pants and I had taken him to my place. I could tell for sure that he was very upset. This gave me courage to take the next few steps. I had to make things better between us. It was my stupid behaviour that put us in this mess in the first place. He suddenly looked up from his position in the driver's seat and got out and came around to me. He stood at a distance of about four feet. He made no attempt to even open the door for me or offer a lift home as he usually would have.

"Bella I'm so sorry… I don't know what to say… I.. I…."

I glanced around the parking lot several students were staring at us….

"Edward can we get inside the car. I want to talk to you."

"Yes. Sure. I'm sorry for not offering. You can ride home with us."

"Charlie's coming. I just want to talk to you."

"Oh. Sure."

He quickly held the passenger side door open and I barely managed to get in, in my hurry without hitting my head on the door frame. Edward carefully closed the door behind me and got in to the drivers side.

"Bella, before you say anything I want to make a formal apology for everything I did today. First taking advantage of you in the closet, then for getting us caught. I knew that Jessica and Mike were coming Alice warned me. I just wanted to show everyone that you were mine… I'm so sorry for what they thought… I know you had a hard time at gym because of it .. I .."

"What do you mean?"

"I heard people making fun of you saying you were hitting on coach Clapp….it's all my fault that they think badly of you… how can I ever…"

"Wait just a second… did you say hitting on coach?"

I burst out laughing. I knew this was not a laughing matter but I just couldn't help it. Who would ever hit on coach Clapp? Let alone joke about it?

"Bella….are you alright?"

Edward was now looking even more worried. He must be thinking I'm hysterical.

"Yes… yes….god Edward. That was so funny. I hit coach on the head with a ball today and everyone was making fun of that. The usual teasing, I didn't really mind."

"So they were just teasing you for that?"

He was pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Yes. Everything is ok. No one made any more comments about the closet, only Jessica and Mike gave me some weird looks that's all. Even they didn't talk to me directly about it. I think finally they got the message that you and I are together. I was a bit embarrassed at first for getting caught but it was really ok. We are supposed to be two teenagers going out together right? So it's a normal thing that .. that we…"

Now Edward's eyes were widening. I could tell I had taken him by surprise. I remembered what I had done to him in the closet. I looked down at my hands they trembled I could no longer look into his eyes. I was ashamed of my behaviour. I'd bitten him! I'd bitten the Victorian virgin on his nipple!

"Bella…" He sighed and moved closer to me, touching my cheek.

"I'm sorry if what we did in the closet made you uncomfortable. I got lost in the moment Bella. I hope I didn't handle you too roughly…..did I hurt you in the gym was that why you were crying?"

"I….I thought you were upset with my behaviour in the closet…"

"No Bella…. I never thought I could feel so much pleasure just being with you…. I completely lost my mind. I barely heard Alice's warning. But I didn't want to stop. I wanted to be there with you forever never letting you go….. it felt so.. .. I really don't have the words to explain it. I think I finally understand why poets and writers describe desire… as a sort of insanity. It is like a drug. I feel it is even more potently than the blood lust. Not once did I think of the thirst Bella, which is incredible considering how close we were. But I was still very scared that I would hurt you with my strength. Just one move made unconsciously might ….."

"Edward…..I don't think you can ever hurt me….."

"I still have to be careful Bella."

He took my face in his hands and kissed my forehead. I felt a shiver run down my back. I still didn't look into his eyes.

"Bella … if it wasn't what happened in the closet… was it the way I surprised you and kissed you in the locker room that upset you… please tell me love… I heard you crying… I felt so helpless to comfort you…. It must have been something I did…"

I shook my head no but he continued.

"Bella… I knew that you were in the locker room alone and I knew you didn't have time to start undressing .. I timed it exactly so that I could kiss you before the others entered the room. I just couldn't wait another second without having you in my arms… I lost control Bella. I love you so much. Please believe me when I say I never intended to invade your privacy or catch you in a state of undress. I would never do that to you. I have never done that ever. Please you have to believe me love… I'm not a pervert. I have never used my abilities to get that type of voyeuristic pleasure. Please Bella look at me… tell me you believe me.. tell me you forgive me…. I can't live without you Bella… You mean everything to me…."

His words came fast and urgent. I was having a hard time understanding what he was saying. I know he spoke this way when he was upset or excited and forgot that I couldn't keep up with the speed. But I did catch everything he said… it just took me longer to process it….. Edward thought that I was upset with his kiss.. I had to make him understand ..

"No no Edward that was fine. You just took me a bit by surprise.. that's all. I know you've never done anything like that to anyone."

He seemed to exhale in relief at my words.

"Then what Bella? What made you cry? I heard you crying and saw you through Angela's eyes. You were very upset love. It has got to be something that happened in that locker room. You were fine before even when I stole a kiss in the class room. Believe me I've never done such a crazy thing ever."

I smiled at that. I have to distract him and make him forget about my crying jag. What was my excuse? There was no way I was going to tell him the real reason.

"Oh is it? What about the mud bath you and Alice took in front of the whole school?"

I tried to make a joke of it.

"That was just a mud fight but today was absolute madness …getting caught in a broom closet making out with you, kissing you in class .. stealing a kiss in the locker room….. I felt so happy Bella so carefree and light headed…."

"We had a quite an interesting day didn't we?" I couldn't help blushing as I remembered everything.

"You weren't upset by any of it?"

"No. Come to think of it.. I can't think of a time that I had so much excitement in one day in such a good way. It was fun being the crazy reckless teenager for once."

"If you also had a fun day why were you crying Bella? Please.. there has to be a reason."

I felt myself blushing crimson as I remembered the real reason behind my tears.

"I guess all the excitement just got to me… I don't know what happened.. just you know I was feeling emotional and all…"

I knew I was blabbering. I hoped that Edward would believe me. I didn't dare look him in the eye. I knew I wasn't a good liar and Edward was very good at reading my eyes.

I saw him shake his head.

"Bella… Bella…. What am I going to do with you….. I know you are lying sweet heart… your heart rate is up and you are blushing … I know all the signs…. Tell me love.. what did I really do to upset you… mmm?

He tried to lift up my face so that he can look into my eyes. I quickly closed them. There was no way I was going to tell him what upset me. I shuddered even thinking of it….

He drew my face closer to him.. "Bella…" he whispered softly. I could feel his intoxicating breath on my face…..he softly touched my jaw with his lips…

Oh my…. I felt my whole body go weak….and I took a deep breath breathing in the essence of him.

"Bella…..I love you…..why don't you tell me what is bothering you. Mmm?"

I managed to blurt out

"No. It's nothing."

I could feel my voice coming in a throaty mumble. He was planting soft kissing all over my face now… getting closer to my lips… I turned my head so that his lips met mine.

"Oh Bella….."

He started deepening the kiss, kissing me more and more passionately. I held onto his hair and dragged his face down.

"Bella… tell me what's wrong love? Mmm?"

He pulled me even closer if that was even possible and his tongue came out and I felt cold moisture against my lips. He was tasting me. I heard a soft moan coming from me some where deep inside.

"Bella … do you think we are moving too fast?" His voice sounded husky.

One of his hands moved down from my face to my neck and I felt tingles running down my neck where he traced patterns.

"No…I … I…like fast….."

I was barely able to answer. But I was so scared he would just stop it all if he felt I was hesitating.

"Mmm so you like it… being close to me this way…?"

I nodded my head vigorously. His hand moved down from my neck to trace along my neck line now….. I felt my nipples harden in anticipation. Was he ever going to touch me there?

"You want to go further?"

Was he crazy… of course I did… I pulled on his hair and angled his face so that I can kiss him more deeply.

"Tell me… you want more?"

I barely heard his soft murmur.

"Yes. More"

I breathed out and shivered as his finger went under the hem of my neckline. I was sorry I had worn a blouse with a very high neck line today.

"Are you scared love..?"

I answered without thinking.

"Yes."

I felt a slight hesitation in him and I quickly got hold of his shirt collar pulling his chest against mine as far as possible. The arm rest in the middle of the car didn't make it possible to be as close as I wanted to be but I struggled to get closer..

I felt his lips smile against me. I knew he understood that I wanted to get closer.

I felt his tongue trace along my collar bone. Oh god….oh god…I wanted him to go lower…..instead I felt the coldness along my neck and he whispered against my ear.

"Why… why are you scared?"

"It's too big"

I said the words that came into my mind. Oh god I still feel the tingling along my neck line. His finger was moving to the button in front of the blouse….

"What is too big love?"

He licked my ear the same time he started playing with the button. I felt myself shudder. I wanted him so much….. His breath was intoxicating… his face just inches from mine….…I looked into his eyes…..they were smoldering orbs of desire… dark and glowing… He moved his face even closer…I closed my eyes..

"What is big love?"

… the button gave away and he planted a kiss on my lips…

"You.. you.. would never fit inside me."

I felt my voice breaking. I could barely speak. I moved my lips against him.. my breathing was erratic…..it took me a minute to grasp that he was not moving. I opened my eyes. Edward was frozen in place. His eyes were closed. He was not moving….I touched his face….

"Edward…"

He didn't respond. Was something wrong? What had happened to him? He was still holding me to him. His finger on my button which was now open. I hesitantly fastened it. I slowly took stock of our surroundings we were still in the car park. It was almost deserted now.

"Edward.. can you hear me?"

I tried to shake him but he didn't respond. I went through everything that had happened. He had been talking to me whispering in my ear and then kissing me passionately while playing with the button. What had he said? He had asked whether I was scared and I remembered telling him that I was but showed him I still wanted him. Then he asked why and I said…..I said…what did I say? I said…. Then it hit me … I had said it was too big…..oh dear god.. what else had I said… then I remembered. I remembered exactly what I had said. I had blurted out the truth…. I was mortified….what had he thought… if I go by his response …..he was petrified… I was horrified now. He must have heard me….. he must have understood. Was he in shock? Can vampires go into shock? I was scared now. I was embarrassed but it was nothing compared to the fear that I felt now. Something was wrong with Edward. Something had happened to him…. I needed Alice…. I needed to take him to Carlisle. I couldn't move he was holding me so tightly.

"Alice…"

I whispered she might be too far away to hear me because she said she would give us privacy she would have moved out of hearing range. I called out more loudly and then decided I needed her help desperately. I knew she would get a vision of it.

"Alice I need you…..Alice please come…." I was nearly in tears now.

"Bella"

I heard her voice near my window and I frantically gestured to her pointing to Edward.

Edward suddenly moved and let go of me and I nearly fell on to the dashboard.

"Sorry Bella…. You just took me by surprise.. everything is ok…..trust me.. I'm sorry…"

I couldn't form a reply. But I nodded my understanding.

I heard Alice get into the back of the car.

"I called Charlie Bella. I saw that you would like to ride home with us."

"Oh! Thank you Alice" I'd forgotten all about Charlie…

Edward pulled out of the parking lot without saying anything else. He drove slower than usual. I saw him turn to look at me but I kept my eyes averted.

"Bella are you alright? I'm sorry if I frightened you. It's just that I was so surprised…and I …"

"I'm ok Edward. I was just worried about you."

I was blushing from head to toe now. I had told him …..gosh….. I felt so embarrassed. I let my hair fall forward to hide my expression from him.

I heard him sigh…. It was all his fault for dazzling me into admitting the truth. Before I knew it we were in front of our house. I was just about to get out, when Edward put his hand on mine.

"Wait Bella…. I still want to …."

I heard laughter from the back seat. We both turned in surprise to look at Alice. I'd forgotten she was even in the car.

"Sure Edward measuring would be a good idea… but I think..

"Alice…."

I heard Edward fiercely roar at her. I sat back in my seat in surprise.

"But honestly Edward a measuring tape is much better than a ruler believe me when I measure….."

"Get out before I throw you out…"

Edward's voice was very loud and frustrated. I had never seen him this upset with Alice. I couldn't believe what all this was about. His face was a mix of mortification and fear.

"Bye Bella see you tomorrow."

Alice gracefully exited the car and immediately blurred into the forest.

"And don't you dare tell anyone else about this do you hear me?"

His voice was threatening.

I heard a soft tinkling of laughter from far away.

Edward's head was back in his hands on the steering wheel.

Now what? I was staring at Edward in surprise. I couldn't believe what upset him so much. He actually seemed to be handling my stupid declaration well on our way back from school. I was still feeling embarrassed about it but it was nothing compared to the look on Edward's face when he'd looked at Alice and the way he was now hiding his face in his hands.

I touched his shoulder.

"Edward what's wrong?"

No response. Just solid stone. So we were back to the stone act were we? Guess I will have to figure this one out myself. What were they talking about? Measuring something? But measuring what? Holly shit!... measuring …measuring …..what I thought was too big for me… now it was my turn to be embarrassed. He was thinking of doing that and Alice had seen it! God…he must be mortified with his sister knowing this. I felt really bad for him. I was actually in this with him and it was my own stupid imagination that got us into this fix anyway. It was just like Alice to point out that a measuring tape was better than a ruler. She was right anyway..and I could may be help him measure. What was I thinking….. get a grip on yourself Bella… you have to make Edward feel better.

"Edward it's ok….please don't be upset….."

"You don't know what I was thinking…." His voice came muffled through his hands.

"Edward I know what you were thinking of doing."

"What?"

He lifted his head to look at me and saw the truth in my face. I was blushing beet red again there was no mistaking the reason. He looked horrified.

I simply smiled at him. He saw the humour in my face and I saw my favourite smile spread across his face.

"Oh Bella…..I'm foolish to even have thought such a stupid thing. And now Alice saw it…"

"Come on Edward…..It was not foolish it's a practical thing to do. I'm glad you took what I said seriously and that you were trying to find a solution for it."

We looked at each other and we simultaneously burst out laughing.

"Bella… Bella…what are we doing…. I think we are both loosing our minds….and I'm supposed to be a medical doctor for heaven's sake this should not be such a problem for me to figure out. It's just that I never really gave it much thought….."

"I know…"

His face grew serious again.

"I'm sure there would never have been a problem if I was human Bella…..but I don't know whether I've changed when I became a vampire….my human memories are very vague.. and I never really….." He didn't finish the sentence and I could tell that if he was able to blush he would be red all over.

"I could talk to Carlisle about it but I feel it's too early to be so concerned Bella…. I…I want to make love to you but not right now…..I want us to be sure about what we want and you to be sure you love me Bella."

I tried to speak. But he held out a hand.

"Bella take all the time you need….I'll still be here for you love. I promise that I will never leave you. You know how much I love you. I want to give you everything you would ever want if you decide to spend your life with me. I want to have some sort of a commitment before we go that far. So let's not worry about it now ok?"

"Yes Edward."

I felt relieved. I was not ready for a commitment right now. The only thing I knew is that I wanted to be with Edward for now and I wanted to see how things would go.

He took my hands in his.

"I love you Bella…..now and forever…that will never change. I hope and pray that you will learn to love me again some day, until then…..I'll keep trying…."

He leaned in and kissed me passionately on my lips. I returned his kiss without a thought. I don't know how long we held each other and kissed but eventually Edward pulled away.

"Bella do you want to get caught kissing me again?

"What?"

I was barely coherent. My head was swimming. I think I forgot to breathe that well again.

"The werewolf on guard duty today is almost here… I could stay if you want."

"No it's ok Edward."

"Then I'll see you tomorrow at school love. So we'll take things as they come ok? And please talk to me about anything that you are worried about. I don't want to go through another misunderstanding like today."

"I know…bye Edward, thank you for the lift."

He leaned across the seat and planted another kiss on my lips.

"It was my pleasure Bella."

If the look on his smoldering eyes was anything to go by he meant more than the lift he'd given me. I carefully got out of the car. I was still feeling a bit dizzy. He waved and took off at break neck speed. I stood there watching after him for a long moment.

I didn't know what the future would hold for us. But I was sure that we can work things out together. I was beginning to believe that Edward would never leave me again. I was looking forward to our future dates.

So this will be the last chapter for this story. I hope you enjoyed it. But it definitely is not the end of the story line! I still have so much to say when it comes to Edward's and Bella's dates and there is also the matter of the lemons. This is simply not enough. So I'm continuing it in my new story "Romance, Love and Desire". I have already uploaded it. It will be based on Bella's and Edward's dates with more lemons and more fun! I really need your feedback on what you want from the new story. So please please review and let me know. If you can tell me the chapters you enjoyed best in this story it will also be very helpful since I can then get an idea of the type of things you enjoy.

I have uploaded the sequel to this story "Love, Romance and Desire". It is the continuation of this story line with many more lemons and a lot more fun :) Well not all fun I guess we forgot Victoria…..anyway I hope to still make it fun.