AN: Ok I'm putting this at the top this time... To those who were wondering, yes this does have a plot :-) and yes :-) there will be plenty of smut to be had... I'm working up to it. Since John has been so wonderfully trained, it would not do for me to keep you all from seeing just what he's got planned in that lovely dirty mind of his. :-) Love to you all and on with the show...

SH/JW

He had never expected this. This was not what was supposed to happen. He hadn't planned for this. John was supposed to have been eagerly anticipating rescue because he was in pain and being tortured, not because he had been turned into a… whatever it was that she had turned him into. It was disturbing and not just because he hadn't anticipated John being like that when they had found him. His own reaction to seeing John like that, naked and anticipating, was probably what was disturbing him the most. He didn't do… It was too messy and emotional. He knew the chemistry and mechanics of course, regardless of the fact that he had never put his knowledge into use. He was not supposed to have a reaction to seeing John naked like that. He was not supposed to become a… a… aroused by anyone. But he supposed if he were to be… attracted to anyone at least it was his blogger. John at least cared for him and had never run from him because of how he was. John was the only one he cared about himself. His blogger was his only friend as he defined them, the only one he trusted that much. But still he would never act on it. At least he had never believed that he would and now…

He considered how they had found John once more, turning the image over in his head again, and once more couldn't help but shiver from the tingle of arousal that slid down his spine.

This was not part of his plans. Not at all. Emotions were too messy and complicated. He wanted nothing to do with them.

He would have to find some way of fixing John he supposed. They would be alone together at the country house in Sussex for a very long time after all. It wouldn't do for him to develop feelings for his friend, especially not while they were in hiding and he was trying to help John to recover from his ordeal at the Woman's hands. As it stood, they weren't John and Sherlock any more either. Their names were going to be different now. Holmes and Watson would disappear in a rather permanent way today. However, John would always be John to him.

He cleared his throat as he pulled his mind back to the here and now and brought his attention where John had been sitting quietly in the back of the car for the last hour and a half.

'Are you alright Sherlock?'

He looked at Lestrade and nodded slightly, relieved that the other man only gave him a tight smile in return. He had likely sent word to their team in London by now. Mycroft would not be amused, but there was nothing he would be able to do. Lestrade had even been cautious enough to have them leave their regular mobiles in Baker Street and use temporary prepay mobiles. 'Thank you.'

Lestrade shook his head, 'No thanks needed Sherlock,' he paused, a rueful smile on his lips. 'Sorry, Heddwyn.'

'Heddwyn?'

John's voice was quiet, but Sherlock was just glad that he had actually said something. Looking back at John he answered his blogger's inquiry. 'We are not going back to London.'

John nodded, 'I noticed. So where are we going then, Portsmouth? Brighton?'

'Worthing, actually.' Sherlock pulled a manila envelope out from under his seat and handed it back. He waited until John had their new ID's in his hands before he continued. 'We are disappearing. My name is now Heddwyn Lestrade and you are to be my husband, Iain MacDougal-Lestrade. We have only been married for three months and are just purchasing our first home together.'

'A farm?'

Sherlock nodded. A farm stead had been his idea. Mycroft would never suspect him of wanting to stay somewhere as quiet as a country farm. He would still help Les… that is Greg, when he could over the computer, but he was essentially retiring for John's sake.

'So you are Greg's cousin and I'm Scottish?' His eyes were fixed to the papers he held, fixed on the civil union license with his forged signature on it. 'How did you manage this Sherlock?'

Lestrade cleared his throat, 'I did.'

'You?'

'Yes.' He met Sherlock's eyes, and the detective could see the unease that lingered in the Inspectors mind. He too was worried over what the Woman had done to John. 'Sherlock would have been too noticeable, me not so much. I took your place for the proceedings after Sherlock had taught me how to forge your signature well enough to fool the government.'

Laughing softly he caught the laughter in John's eyes. 'No one thinks twice of Lestrade dragging me in on an ASBO.'

'You should have heard the lecture he got from his brother for that one.' Lestrade let out a humorless laugh of his own. 'Damn bastard.'

'So a farm in the country then?' John nodded, 'Alright. Good… that's fine.'

He sucked in a worried breath and studied the slightly smiling face of his partner. There was no indication that John would fight him on this. His face was filled with determination and understanding. This was good. They could work with this. John seemed almost normal now that he was in the car and away from her. 'All fine?'

'It's all fine.'

SH/JW